Chapter 1- "You'll never be free."
The sun peeked through the slightly parted curtains as they swayed with the steady wind casting a bright glow on the sleepy teenager’s face. She peaked through her eyelids and quickly shut them then turning to face the door.
She jolted at the sound of glass breaking.
She cautiously opened her door and sneaked towards the staircase.
Peering over the railing and she saw her drunk mother sitting on the floor beside a pool of dark liquid. It was alcohol.
She hurriedly descended the stairs and rushed to her mother’s aid.
Raven may not have had the best childhood or experiences with her mother but that doesn’t keep her from loving her.
She lives with the hopes of one day waking up to a loving mother once again.
Her mother wasn’t always like this, no, her mom was the best mother any child could ask for.
After her father’s tragic passing, her life was never the same. Her mom has been drinking ever since.
It was pure luck that Raven was old enough to cook and do everything for herself at that time.
Her mother often left her home alone for days and she had to feed herself. Whenever her mom, Carmen came home drunk after being paid, she would steal money in order to sustain her needs. It was shocking how Carmen never noticed.
She slowly began picking up the glass shards, careful not to get cut. Her mother had already dozed off right there on the floor. She cleaned up the mess and draped a blanket over her mother’s shoulders before getting ready for school.
School was her second home. It was her thinking place. A place where she could relax and feel free, well, whenever she was not given unwanted glares or rude remarks from the guy who used to be her best friend, Alex Knight.
He would tell her anything and would often encourage others to join. Apparently, the entire school hated her.
I exhaled deeply as I entered the school building, desperately trying to ignore the disgusted glares I received. No one here thinks I can talk, they all think I lost my voice but have no idea how. Alex does too. It’s another thing he bullies me about. It’s really sad to know he was my best friend and to think I confided in him. What’s even sadder is that he’s my neighbour.
I finally made it to my locker and I collected the books I needed for today. First period was Chemistry, and sadly, Alex had it too.
It was one of those periods that everyone looks forward to since he always embarrasses me.
I entered the empty classroom and sat at the very back. I waited as the other students filled in and soon after, the teacher entered and began the lesson.
Looks like Alex won’t be here today. I guess he’s skipping classes again.
Halfway through the lesson, the doors burst open and Alex waltzed in like he opened the place.
His eyes met mine and I sucked in a breath as I immediately averted my gaze. I had once tried to look him in the eye and it didn’t end well for me. I was suspended for three days. He had his ‘girlfriend’ testify that I beat her. All the evidence lead to me and I had no proof of my innocence. Ever since that day, I never dared to look him in the eye or retaliate when he bullied me. I eventually became reserved and two months later, I quit speaking overall.
“Mr. Knight, I would appreciate it if you not interrupt my class or at least try to make it on time.” The teacher snapped and Alex only glared as he walked towards his seat. I could feel his stare burning into the side of my head but I dare not look up.
The teacher begins again and I was once again lost in thought. I was pulled from my thoughts as something collided with my head. I looked down and saw the ball of paper. I looked around but everyone was looking ahead so I opened it.
“Ms. Black, would you be so kind as to share what you have written on that piece of paper?” Ms. Pamela asked and I shook my head.
She approached me and snatched the paper before I could do anything.
She looked at the paper then back at me. She scowled and shouted “detention after school for one hour” I stared at her, mouth agape as she walked away.
The class erupted into giggles and snickers that only ceased when Ms. Pamela looked around.
I glanced at Alex and saw he was smirking evilly at me.
I lowered my gaze and blinked back tears. I hated how emotional I could get. It was natural for one to cry when they felt hurt but I couldn’t afford to cry here. No. It would give him another thing to bully me about so I blinked rapidly and displayed my emotionless mask.
The bell rang signalling it was lunch and I waited for everyone to leave before gathering my stuff. I was walking out the door when I tripped and fell into the hallway. I hit the ground hard and flinched as I realized my knee was bleeding. I turned around to see Alex with his right foot in the doorway.
I guess detention wasn’t enough then.
I sat up and opened my bag and took out a band-aid. I brought these since I knew stuff like this would happen. I wiped away the blood with a tissue and placed the band-aid on top. I rose to my feet and walked to the cafeteria. All the while, ignoring the pang of hurt that flared in my chest at the thought of his smiling face.
I thought we were be friends.
Will I ever get the old Alex back?
When will I have a normal life again?
I pushed open the doors of the almost empty cafeteria and went to get my food. Classes had just finished so the children were still talking or putting their books away.
I took my tray and sat at the far end of the room. This table was near the bin but not too close so I preferred it since no one wanted to sit here. I had no friends and I was quite happy that way. I don’t really need friends and all those newcomers who began talking to me left in fear of being bullied before I actually talked to them. That was way before I stopped talking.
I took a bite of the sandwich and smiled slightly as I recalled a memory of my parents and I making sandwiches one day. We were going for a picnic and I was super excited.
I heard the other children enter and get the lunches. The room was immediately filled with the loud chattering of the girls and the bickering of some jocks.
I knew Alex had entered due to the many girls that crowded one specific table. He had always been popular among the girls. I always had a small crush on him but I never let it affect our friendship, besides, he had a girlfriend. Even though she hated my guts for hanging around him, I still showed her kindness. I guess she knew I liked him but she should know I would never get between them.
The day went on peacefully and a sense of dread washed over me as the bell rang.
I had detention.
Mom would kill me when I got home.
I walked though the hallways and pushed the doors to the detention centre open.
I looked inside and my breath hitched. There, in the front row, sat Alex Knight and he was staring at me intently.
Why is the world so cruel to me?
I sat at the other end of the room and pulled out a sheet of paper and a pencil.
I began doodling, anything to avoid remembering I’m in the same room alone with my bully.
When I was finished, I place my pencil on the table and admired my drawing.
It was a black wolf running free in the forest at night. I smiled down at my drawing.
Drawing was one of the few ways I displayed my emotions. This one shows how I want to be free and able to live without having to care about others thoughts and not be afraid of anyone, just like this alpha wolf.
My day dream came to an abrupt end as the page was removed from my line of sight and I looked upwards.
There he was. Alex stood there gazing at my drawing. He too knew about me expressing my emotions through drawings and I would not be the slightest bit surprised if he knew what I was trying to express through the drawing.
“You wish to be free?” He asked rhetorically and snorted. I looked away for a moment but my head snapped back when I heard paper tearing.
Alex was tearing my drawing. Each rip showing me what he meant.
“You will never be free as long as I’m alive. I’ll make sure you never are.” His words stung as the reality of it all brought tears to my eyes.
I really was never going to be free unless I got help which I’m too scared to do.
I’m really going to be bullied until I move away from him. I can’t wait for college to come.
I opened mouth to speak but nothing came out.
“Pathetic, can’t even talk” he retorted as he threw the pieces of my once so beautiful artwork in the air, leaving them to float down around me.
He then took my pencil and snapped it in half.
“Don’t ever forget, you’ll never be free!” And with that, he went back to his corner.
I sat there staring into space. I let my thoughts consume me as I let the tears flow.
I really wish it was me who had died.
That way Alex would not have hated me.