Who I Am Hates Who I've Been
Today I was glad to go to training; I needed to clear my head. I had to get out of the house so Kearn wouldn't get suspicious to why I was walking around moping even more so than usual all the time. I joined this training in the first place to get my mind off her, but it seemed to just make it easier for me to stalk her. Now, I determined I was completely dedicated to the program. I just couldn't let Audrey get under my skin, or Sean intimidate me anymore.
I closed my eyes and transported to the gym. I rarely used my favorite truck anymore. Honestly, I couldn't bare to take out the CD that Estelle had made for me. Many days I would just listen to the radio or nothing. However today it would cause too much anger to listen to it. Maybe one day when I saw how happy she was, I would listen to it again.
I walked into the training gym, and it was much different than usual. The lights were on, when it was always pitch black. Sean was sitting at his desk reading a paper, when he is usually training himself. He appeared so causal and laid back, instead of the usual uptight and aggressive personality. Best of all though, Audrey was no where in sight.
I cleared my throat to get Sean's attention, even though I was sure he heard me come in. "Have a seat, Henry." He took one hand off his paper to point to the chair in front of his desk. I walked cautiously over to his desk. I could never trust Sean and his antics. Then it all came back to me, all that happened before Estelle's party. I had been so focused with the aftermath of my gift that I had almost forgot. Audrey kissed me, and then I cussed her out. She must have told Sean that I was headed to Estelle's party. However, when Sean put down his paper, he didn't look angry at all. "You don't look too hot Henry, are you all right?"
I stumbled through my words, not sure if I should just go ahead and apologize first or not. "I-I guess that...you know, heard from Audrey?"
"Audrey. Hmm, she won't be training with us anymore." Sean said point-blank. He turned another page in his paper, determined to look at every last page before fully paying attention to me even though it was now 5 minutes after our training was supposed to begin. If I was usually even a minute late, Sean would rip my head off.
Definitely not the answer I was expecting. I wasn't sure if I wanted to ask why, but I knew that I had to. Curiosity would get the better of me. "Oh, why?" I attempted to not sound too excited.
"Well, it has come to my attention that you aren't very fond of her. So she is no longer needed. We have a change of game plan now. I had made a promise to her so I told her I'd give her a chance, but you did not click." Sean was serious now. He got out of his chair and began pacing behind his desk. However, what he said made no sense to me. Why would she leave just because I didn't like her? I thought this was just a training camp for new vampires to the clan. "I've been working on this for centuries, so she was useful to me for a time, and I felt like the least I could do was a trial run for her, but-" Sean trailed off before continuing again. "I would not let her ruin this for me." Sean paced around a little more. I wasn't sure what he was aiming for, a question or just some added suspense to what else he had to say.
"The first part of your training is done, the physical part. This next task is the most important one that I have told you to do yet." Sean stopped pacing and looked me dead in the eyes. "It might sound a little crazy. I didn't really want to go about it this way, but I need you to get back together with Estelle Gray." I searched Sean's face for a sign that he was joking, but there was none. He was completely serious.
"Hold up, I'm a little confused." I was the one pacing the room now. I looked him in the eyes, and shook my head. "You want me to get back together with my human girlfriend? The one that you always tell me to avoid. The one that you told me I couldn't stay together with if I wanted to be part of the clan."
A quick smirk crossed Sean's face, which sent me even more mixed signals. "Yes, that is exactly what I am telling you to do. I told you plans have changed, and I was figuring that this would not be a problem for you."
I walked back to a chair and sunk into it. Sean was not going to be happy about this. "Well, I wish you told me earlier." I thought back to last night; she would never want to get back together with me now. I didn't want to try to go after her anymore. We were done the day I told her I didn't love her. I should have realized that way back then.
"What's the problem? She loves you, doesn't she?" Sean seemed concerned now. His eyes were scanning my face.
"She did, but there is another boy now...Ethan." I couldn't help to say his name with disgust.
Sean's eyes went wide. "I'm presuming Ethan Clark. I can't believe this." Sean slammed his fist down on his desk. "That son of a bitch."
I was utterly surprised, how did Sean know who this Ethan kid was. Did literally everyone have some kind of relationship with this kid? There must be something about him. "You know what," Sean said, obviously a new idea was coming to him, "that makes it even better. You've shape-shifted into him before? You can do it again, and sabotage the relationship. That will really get..." Sean drifted off into his own thoughts.
How did he know that I had shape-shifted into him? I guess he kept more tabs on me than I knew about. "I have, and believe me I wouldn't mind doing that. However, I broke up with Estelle long before Ethan. I couldn't be with her because I what I am. I'm tired of the secrets and the lies, and I can't hid behind her parent's strict rules anymore." My mind flashed back to that horrible day when I first broke her heart; I shook my head to get it out. "I was obsessed these past few weeks, but last night confirmed that I need to get her off of my mind until she leaves for Chicago." I was assured in my new resolution.
"Ugh." Sean grunted. "I shouldn't have given Audrey that chance. She tried too hard, and in result you were too extreme with your fascination. I should have known you would have messed this up so badly that-" Sean realized that he need to regain his poise. He was going to say more than he desired to reveal. "Look, Henry." He was standing right next to me, and he had his hand on my shoulder. " You never hurt Estelle before, have you? You are one of the most controlled vampires I have ever met."
I shook my head, even more confused. "No, of course I haven't. However, she asked to marry me, and I couldn't..." I stopped because I looked at Sean's face, he seemed to be melting with happiness.
His grip tighten on my shoulder. "She wanted to marry you?" I could hear the giddiness in Sean's voice.
"Yes, we'd been talking about it a little. But Sean, this is getting too weird for me. I still don't quite understand. I'm not okay with this part of my 'training' either." I shook his hand off my shoulder, and started to head for the door. Sure, I would love to get back with Estelle, but we broke up for a reason. I might have even forgotten that these past couple of weeks. I was obsessed with this new power and not thinking clearly. However, last night was a rude reminder. I couldn't hurt her again. I was already at the door when all the muscles in my body were all the sudden frozen. There was severe pain as they kept attempting to thaw, only to be frozen in even tighter confines. I felt like I couldn't bare to move even one step, only the muscles in my face I could move. "What the heck?" I said trying to move. I couldn't just from the excruciating pain alone.
"I am much more powerful than you, Henry. I have powers you didn't even know were possible. So, I will make this very clear." By now Sean had walked in front of me and placed his hand back on my shoulder. His hand burned on my frozen muscles. "You will do whatever I tell you to do. Don't make me dispose of you like I did Audrey." With that Sean transported out of the room, as my muscles painfully came back to their normal state.