Chapter Fourteen – Confession
We were sitting in plane to London. I am so scared of Afnaan. What he will do? I don’t even know Where I stand in Zaeem’s life. I looked at him who is sleeping peacefully lying his head on my shoulder his hand around my waist.. He looks more handsome from near. I love him and I will fight for him.
Once we landed in London. It’s already night. Zaeem told me that we are going to stay in his house for the night. When we reached his house I was already very tired from journey.
Zaeem said, “Let’s order something from outside for dinner”
I nodded. When Zaeem was about to leave for his room. I said, “Zaeem I want to talk with you”
He said, “Sure Aneesha but first let me have a bath.”
I nodded he left.
I sat on sofa and was thinking how to ask him but when my gaze fell on freshly showered Zaeem coming down in white t-shirt and pants with wet hair like cherry on top. I was so mesmerized by looking at him.
He snapped fingers infront of me and said, “Where are you lost?”
I said, “Nothing. I will also just come. Please order something till then.”
He said, “Okay”
I quickly got freshen up and wore my night dress and came down. I saw Zaeem setting the table.
He said, “You are on time. I ordered burger and fries. Is it okay for you?”
I said, “yeah I am”
We started eating when I said, “Zaeem what you think about me?”
Zaeem said, “I don’t know how you will react after knowing this but I think hiding this from you is not right”
I said, “What is it Zaeem? You can tell me anything”
He said, “Aneesha... I- I am married”
I said, “I know”
Zaeem was shocked and said, “What? How? No one knows about this not even my parents”
Again again my stupid mouth.
I said, “I mean I am shocked so I didn’t know what I am saying. oh my god You are married??”
He said, “Yes I am. I am sorry I hid this from you but I don’t have any wrong intension behind it. Please don’t misunderstand me.. I -”
I said, “I am not misunderstanding you Zaeem. Do you love her?”
He said, “Yes.. No.. I don’t know. Her name is also Aneesha. I have not seen her face. I know it feel strange marrying someone without looking at them but Trust that time everything felt, right.
I was heart broken as my bride ran away from marriage. It was business marriage. I was just 19 at that time. I had my doubts I told my father about her but he told me it’s nothing but when she ran away I got to know that my father knew that she has boyfriend and was being forced by her parents to marry me. I was so hurt. I trusted my father most in this world but that I lost that trust. I felt betrayed. I ran away from Marraige hall.
It was new place for me. We were in India. Somehow I found one bar and went inside. I was sitting alone and sulking in my misery when I met Aneesha. She was wearing mask as it was that day’s theme. I was not wearing. She started talking to me and hen suddenly she proposed me to marry her.
Don’t me how I don’t want to recall that moments when I fell for her charming and loving words. In short I agreed to marry her. We did Nokah and then went to hotel and then consummated our marriage.
Next day when I woke up she left. No trace of her. I searched for her but I didn’t find her. She disappeared like foam. I searched a lot for her but didn’t found her.. I don’t know where is she? Why she left? But she is my wife officially. Even I went to police they said they want picture of her it will be difficult to find her by name. I was so lost but then my father found me and he brought me back to london. From then I started living alone here in this house that was my condition to return. She never contacted me.
After started looking for her through PI and I got to know she married someone else and shifted to turkey. He has the pictures of her but I didn’t see her. I don’t want to. She forgot me so easily. I trusted her but she betrayed me..used me. I hate her. I hate her with my whole heart.
I was shocked..Married..What the hell? Who gave him this false news? Will he believe me if I tell him truth now..No..No..He hates me. Let him love me as new Aneesha.
I said,“May be your PI mistook. May be he is not married and waiting for you.”
He glared at me and said,“Stop taling her eyes..He is the one. My PI sent her masked picture she look exactly same.”
I said, “I am sorry”
He said, “Why are you sorry? It’s not your fault”
I said, “What will you do if she comes back. Will you accept her?”
He said, “No.. I can’t. She left me when I needed her the most. Without any explanation. Without a word.. What if she does it again? I don’t trust her. Anyway she married someone else If I meet her again. I will give her divorce without second thoughts. Anyway it will bother her because she didn’t think of marraige as real otherwise o
she would have married without divorcing me.”
I gasped, “D-Divorce??”
Even though I had slight thought of telling him but not after this. He will divorce me.
He said, “Why are you scared?”
I said, “M-Me? No.. I am not s-scared”
He said, “okay if you say so.After hearing all this you still want to be with me?”
I said, “yes.. You were young. I can understand you can make mistakes”
He said, “Don’t call it a mistake Aneesha. I don’t regret it. I accepted her from heart if she would not have run I would have given my best to make this marriage work. Marriage is big thing for me. It can never be mistake.”
I felt really good after hearing this but sad as well because I lost beautiful life with my husband because of my impulsive decision.
I said, “I know it’s not the right time but will you marry me Zaeem?”
He was beyond shocked and said, “What? We just started dating. Don’t you think we are rushing things”
I said, “I don’t have time. I have to get married to Afnaan in one month. I can’t marry him Zaeem. Please will you marry me?”
He said, “You really love me or you want escape from him and think better option than him.”
I was hurt hearing this.
I said, “You don’t trust me Zaeem. I love you really. There will be no one for me other you.”
He said holding my hand, “I am sorry. but still I think we are rushing things. Don’t want to commit same mistake again”
I said,“I don’t want to lose you..Please you are not understanding my situation. Please Marry me.” I am on brink of tears.
He got silent and after few minutes. He said,“Okay..I don’t know If I am doing right or wrong but I will trust my heart once again.”
I said,” I love you”
He said, “Thank you”
I said, “What Thank you? You don’t love me”
He said, “Honestly I like you a lot but love I don’t know”
I said, “it’s okay I don’t force you. I love you and my love is enough for both us”
He said, “You know Aneesha. You are so much like her,.you name, you personality.. Everything reminds me of her.. I am afraid that I am using you as an rebound”
I said, “It doesn’t matter what am I to you. As long as you are with me. I am fine with everything”
He said, “Thank you for understanding.”
I said,“stop with serious topics. Let’s have some fun. Night is beautiful and we are together and alone. ”
I walked towards him and sat in his lap and placed my hands around his neck. He gulped. I bent down and kissed him and he reciprocated. He placed one hand on my waist and other on the nape of my neck then deepened the kiss.
I don’t know when, how we reached here but right now we are on bed. Kissing life out of each other. I removed my top and I tugged at his t-shirt to be removed but he caught my hand and moved away. I felt disappointed.
He said, “I think we should stop here.”
I said, “But why?”
He said, “We are not yet married and it’s not right”
I said, “Whenever it comes to me why you become Saint? ”
He sighed and said, “Aneesha.. Let’s sleep I am tired”
I glared at him and wore my top and turned around and lied on bed facing my back towards him. He lied beside me and wrapped arm around my waist. I pushed his hand away but again he placed his hand on my waist and pulled me closer my back collided with his chest. I lost my ability to think and lost in the rhythm of his heartbeat. He placed his head in the crook of my neck and kissed my collarbone and said, “I am sorry.”
I turned around and looked in his eyes. He looked sad.
I placed my hand on his cheek and said, “It’s okay. I overreacted. You are right in your place.”
I forget everytime that I am not his wife for him. I know he is my husband but he doesn’t so he is hesitant.
I kissed him on lips and said, “Good night”
He smiled and kissed my forehead. I placed my head on his chest and can smell his manly scent. I am totally addicted to him. He wrapped his arm around me.
I closed my eyes to sleep but I fear that what will happen when he comes to know the truth that I am his wife Aneesha.