After the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a long time, I gradually slip back into consciousness. At least I think I do because pictures flash in my mind of Jack and me, leaving me wondering if it was all just a dream - a hot and sexy dream - and if I were still in the middle of it.
But as I shift a little, I feel a slight sting between my legs inside my core that’s pleasantly aching from last night’s activities and already starting to get damp again at the thought of what happened.
And damn, did things happen. After the first mind-blowing orgasm induced by the one man whose touch I had been craving for months, and two more in the shower, I still feel exhausted from all the emotions and sensations that our first intimate encounter brought about. I take a couple of deep breaths and try to calm down my racing heart.
Despite the heat that rushes through my body, a certain sense of cold takes hold of me all of a sudden because contrary to my expectations from last night, I don’t wake up wrapped up in strong arms. And before I open my eyes, I almost expect Jack to be gone.
But relief washes through me when my eyes flutter open and my gaze falls on his linen-covered shape. He’s still here. All the way over on the other side of the bed with his back turned to me. I have a strong urge to move closer to him, but I’m somewhat reluctant to do so. Maybe after last night, he needs some distance? I don’t want to overwhelm or suffocate him with even more physical contact.
So with a small sigh, I get up, grab my panties and sleeping shirt, and quickly go to the bathroom to relieve my bladder that the little peanut is jumping on again. Thoughts like that still make me chuckle, and I shake my head in disbelief. Peanut - my little peanut.
After I washed my hands and splashed my face, I stand in front of the sink and look down at my belly, gently stroking the bump. Less than five months to go. Five months!
And out of nowhere, all the worries I had when I first found out that I was pregnant come back. How am I ever going to be a decent mom? What if this baby doesn’t like me? There are so many things that I could do wrong. And what about Jack? What’s his role going to be? Will he still be around once the baby is born, as he promised?
I inhale deeply and slowly, but I can’t prevent my eyes from filling with tears. Shit, where is all of this coming from all of a sudden? Just a minute ago, I was happily reliving last night, and now I’m a sobbing mess. I lean on the sink, head bowed, and close my eyes, trying to calm down, inhaling through my nose, exhaling through my mouth.
I flinch as two strong hands stroke my arms and cover my hands. “Hey.” Jack’s soft voice brings a subtle smile to my face and comforts me at once. “What’s wrong?”
With another sob, I lean back into his muscular chest, and his arms encircle me, taking me to my favorite place. He rests his chin on my shoulder and looks at me in the bathroom mirror.
“It’s all good,” I say with a deep sigh. “I’m just freaking out a little over this whole mom thing again. And then there’s you-” I avert my gaze as I let the sentence trail off.
Jack’s body tenses up when he hears my words. He loosens the embrace and turns me to face him. “What about me?” he asks with a frown.
I wrinkle my nose with another sigh. “It’s just - uhm - you-”
I still can’t meet his gaze, so he lifts my chin and makes me look at him. “Emma-” His still soft voice makes me tremble, and I let out a shuddery breath. “Please, don’t tell me I’m the reason you’re crying.” He cups my face with his hand and gently strokes my cheek with his thumb.
I shake my head and wipe away the few tears that ran down my face. “I’m not sure how to act around you. I don’t know if you need a little distance now, or how that will work in the future - if you need some days apart after a night like the last. Or if there’s ever gonna be a night like the last again. Are you over it? Can I touch you whenever I feel like it? Which is, to be honest, all the time. All these crazy thoughts, you know?” I want to avert my eyes again because I feel a little uncomfortable, maybe even a little afraid of his answer, but something in his gaze captivates and at the same time reassures me.
A small smile plays on his lips. “You want to touch me all the time?” He laughs when I give him a casual shrug. “Let’s get back to that later. But first - If I’m completely honest, I don’t know either. We’ll just have to wait and see. Right now I’m very much enjoying your touch.” He looks down at my hands that I placed on his bare chest and covers them with his. “And I will let you know if that changes. We will always talk about this, okay? I will let you know how I’m feeling. So please, no more crazy thoughts. Agreed? Especially not about me.”
I nod. “Okay. I’m just afraid that it’ll all be too much for you and that I’ll end up alone with a baby and screw it all up.”
He sighs. “That won’t happen. I’ll be there for you if you want me to, no matter how this between us proceeds. And you have my sister who is a loyal friend. And then there’s - Rob.”
I narrow my eyes at him after he hesitated a moment before he mentioned my best friend. “Then there’s - Rob?” I mimic his words. “Is something wrong with - Rob? Don’t you like - Rob?”
With a straight face, he answers, “Why wouldn’t I like him? He’s your friend and a great person.”
I throw my head back and laugh. “That was the biggest verbal eye roll ever.”
He looks at me with a stunned expression. “Excuse me? That wasn’t - Fine,” he admits, “he’s not my favorite person, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’ll be there to support you. So I’m glad you have him. Happy?”
I put my hand on his cheek and press my lips on his for a short and tender kiss. “Very. So how are you feeling?”
“You’re asking me this like the answer to that question could be anything but fucking amazing,” he answers with a huge grin. “And you? Crazy thoughts aside.”
I let out a small laugh. “Crazy thoughts aside, fucking amazing sums it up pretty nicely.” My gaze meets his, and I stare at him with a probably very goofy smile on my face. “That means you’re feeling comfortable?”
As his answer, he cups my face with his hands and lowers his mouth to mine. I open my lips when he runs his tongue along them, and as we deepen the kiss, Jack’s hands wander down to the hem of my shirt. He slips them underneath and gently runs them over the bare skin on my waist. His featherlike touch is barely there, but enough to make me feel, to send intense shivers down my spine, and make goosebumps erupt all over my skin.
After what feels like hours, but at the same time not nearly long enough, Jack pulls back. “If you were wondering - that means yes, I’m feeling very comfortable. Don’t ask me to make any important decisions though because right now my brain is on standby, and my dick is to be held responsible for my actions.”
With a smirk, I look down between us to said body part in charge that is straining the fabric of his boxers. “So I should be talking to him?”
Jack is about to nod but lets out a low growl-like sound when I reach into his boxers and grab him. “Damn, Peach, that’s some smooth talking,” he murmurs. And within seconds, my shirt goes flying, and he caresses my breasts with his hands and mouth and tongue, and even his teeth.
I have to hold on to his biceps with the hand that is not back in his underwear and lean back against the sink. Otherwise, I’d melt into a puddle on the floor. Even more so when one of his hands finds its way into my panties. It’s getting harder for me to concentrate on what I’m holding in my hand, and Jack hisses when I squeeze a little too hard.
“Sorry,” I moan, “but you - I can’t - damn, that feels amazing.”
“I agree,” Jack mumbles, his mouth still busy with my breasts. “And you know what would feel even more amazing?”
Before I can answer, Jack puts his hands on my ass, lifts me up and wraps my legs around his waist to walk over to the bed with me. He gently puts me down before he kisses me passionately, making my heart beat faster and faster. Now I’m a panting mess which I, without a doubt, prefer over the sobbing mess. It’s a miracle that I haven’t stopped breathing altogether, especially when he moves his lips down my body, over every inch of my skin, all the way to my soaking wet panties that he peels off me.
I arch my back and moan his name, and I writhe under his touch and the flick of his tongue. I groan when his mouth does all these marvelous things to me. And I groan some more when he slides two fingers inside me and curls them in just the right direction to hit that spot that makes me scream out in ecstasy.
He throws me over the edge without much effort. Now I’m a spent mess after yet another spectacular climax, and all I’m capable of is lying on the bed spread-eagled with only my chest heaving up and down.
“Giving up already?” Jack chuckles as he lies down next to me and turns my head so he can kiss my lips.
I snort. “Never. Give me a minute, and we’ll continue.” I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I hear Jack laugh softly, and with that, feel his breath on my shoulder. And while his hand gently strokes over my belly, his lips wander along my skin until they reach my ear.
“Do you remember what you told me the night we met?” he whispers in a raspy voice that sends another one of those hot shivers down my spine. “You said that peaches taste delicious. And you were right, you are delicious, Peach.”
“Ah, damn!” I groan. “The things you do to me-” And without warning, I push him over onto his back, straddle him and show him that I’m far from giving up.
Later that afternoon, after a brunch with our friends who gave us some funny looks but didn’t comment on how close we were all day, Jack and I are on our way back home. The whole ride, I alternately look out the window and over to Jack as he’s driving. All with a silly grin on my face. I don’t recall any other weekend where I had as many orgasms as I did within the last 24 hours, and that sent my hormones on a new high. Thus the silly grin.
So here I am, smiling happily at the man next to me while holding his hand, and I’ve never felt more content and relaxed as right now.
“What are you thinking about with that huge smile on your face?” Jack asks when he gives me a quick look before he focuses his attention back on the road.
I chuckle. “Nothing in particular. It’s been an amazing weekend, and I’m still trying to wrap my head around everything that happened.”
With a silly grin of his own, Jack lifts our joined hands to his lips and places a soft kiss on my knuckles. “I agree.”
“Hey - uhm - I was wondering-” I clear my throat, suddenly a little nervous when I remember something. “Do you want to accompany me to my next ultrasound appointment tomorrow? Maybe we’ll find out if the peanut really is a boy.”
When I see the smile on his face widen even more, I instantly feel reassured. He gives me another quick look. “I’d love to,” he tells me.
Damn, my face already hurts from all the grinning.
And that makes what happens when he pulls up in front of my apartment building, a little difficult to take lightly. I had the rest of the day - and admittedly the night - already planned out in my head. So I unsuspectingly ask him, “Do you want to come in?”
I get more and more nervous when he avoids my gaze and clears his throat. “I - uh - maybe I should-” he mumbles. And then he finally looks at me when he says, “I think I should go home. I need some time alone.”
My eyes widen slightly, and I open and close my mouth a couple of times. I know I should tell him it’s totally fine, and that he should go if he needs some time to himself. But why does this feel like a rejection? Damn, I need to get my shit together.
“Are you okay?” Jack asks me when we stand next to his car. A deep frown is etched on his face, and I feel bad for conveying the impression that I’m not okay.
“Yes. It’s fine,” I lie because I’m not going to be that bitch. “Take all the time you need. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
He nods, and we say goodbye with a quick hug and an even quicker kiss.
I promised him to be supportive and understanding, but I can’t shake off the disappointment. Not when I enter my apartment alone, and not when I have dinner and sit on my couch to watch some TV alone. And most certainly not when I go to bed early and try to fall asleep and escape the depressing thoughts in my head.
But sleep won’t come. So I’m fairly certain that I didn’t imagine the knock on my door at way past ten o’clock at night. But I don’t get up to see who that visitor might be, not until my phone, that’s lying on my bedside table, beeps with an incoming text.
I don’t have to check who the message is from when I read. “It’s me... can we talk?”
I jump out of bed, run to my door and tear it open. And without hesitation, Jack takes a step forward, puts his hands around my face and kisses me passionately.
“I thought you wanted to talk,” I gasp when I come up for air.
“That was a lie,” Jack says and pushes me back inside my apartment so he can close the door. “I need to be close to you, I need to feel you,” he continues in between more fervent kisses. “I’m sorry I was so dismissive earlier, but what happened these past days scared the shit out of me all of a sudden.”
“And now it doesn’t scare you anymore?”
“No,” he says with determination.
I pull back and study him a minute, and for an instant, I wonder if he’s drunk again, but when I look into his eyes, I know he’s sincere and completely sober. So I let him be close to me, let him feel me because that’s what I need too.