Third person's POV
She wanted him to touch her she knew she should move, say something but she simply stood there longing for his kiss, She pulled his jacket closer and willed the feeling away. He looked so aloof, standing there with his cigarette, the darkness gave him that aura of mystery he seemed so frequently to possess lately. How strange to remember the way she thought of him when she’d first met him. It felt like ages ago now but at that time she’d believed him to be an open book. A simple man. Predictable. Malleable.
But now he seemed so different. Now he practically oozed control and she was the one who felt off balance, unsure. She hated it and yet, she was fascinated by him.
“That’s quite a compliment,” he said, the timber of his voice warming her more than his suit.
For a moment she’d forgotten what she’d said. Then, upon remembering, she murmured, " its only the truth." and it was. She didn’t know how Janis would resist him. Janis, who’d already shown herself to be incapable of resisting much.
Mimi had the sudden disagreeable thought that soon Janis would not have reason to resist him. After all, in a few short months, they would be married, She could do what she wished with him, take him to her bed if she desired, legally, morally and without guilt. The thought caused unpleasant bile to rise to the back of Mimi’s throat. Holy mother of Jesus, she was jealous already, She was jealous and they hadn’t even met yet. She closed her eyes consumed by a foreboding sense of doom.
"Miss McCarthy," his voice startled her, so real beside her mental picture of him hugging Janis.
“Are you all right?” He asked. "Maybe we should go in now."
She swallowed hard and shook her head. She couldn’t go in now. Her emotions were written all over her face, she knew as she felt the uncontrollable intensity of the twisting of her belly.
" I’m fine. I- I don’t want to go in just yet.” He leaned back against the car and studied her. “All right.”
From the corner of her eye, she could see the orange glow of the cigarette as he put it to his lips. She had to give him up, It was crazy, She could neither admit nor keep up this proprietary feeling she had for him, She’d worked long and hard with him for the express purpose of saving her sister and save her sister she must. It was far too late now to do anything else though what else she might do If her sister were suddenly not in need, she dare not contemplate. She pictured Janis’s pretty sulky face and felt anger tremble inside her. No, she mustn’t let it. She steeled herself against the ugly feeling but still, the vexing fact was that Janis had herself into this horrified state and now she was to be not only saved but practically rewarded with a man whom Mimi had come to care too much about. The bitterness of it called her, the sensation of being cheated appalled her.
So, think you’ll invest in Marris’s boarding houses? He asked conversationally. Mimi pulled her attention away from her pettiness and sighed. "No." and I believe it was an apartment building.
“I don’t doubt it,” he answered.
He was bored out of his mind with her, she could tell he was going to be swept off his feet by Janis pretty, charming, sexy Janis. I like it. The words sprang into her head in the exact spine-tingling tone he’d used but he didn’t know, couldn’t know the tantalizing model of womanhood that awaited him If he thought Mimi was attractive enough to kiss, Janis would make him salivate with desire.
“Miss McCarthy, I wish you’d lose that Morbid expression,” he said. “You don’t have to worry. I’m sure Janis and I’ll like each other just fine.” It was almost laughable, how he misjudged hear fears but what could she do? Set him straight?
The idea of it intrigued her. How would he react, she wondered, if she suddenly turned and kiss him? He would respond, she felt sure, What man wouldn’t do to a willing lady? But the feeling she knew it would give her caused heat and melting inside that was delicious to feel his hands again on her body, his lips on her face, on her neck, on her mouth, She wanted it. Oh, how she wanted it but the disappointments he’d feel in her when he laid eyes on Janis was too much to bear, she wouldn’t be able to stand it, especially not if they were to repeat the folly of their attraction, He’d probably even forgotten about it but the feelings it awakened in her every time she thought of it were as vital and alive as if it had happened yesterday.
“Yes, I’m sure you will,” she said in a tiny voice.
He started. "What?"
She realized then how long it had been since he’d spoken. “I said I’m sure you and Janis will like each other.” Too sure.
He blew out some smoke then got rid of the cigarette. “Hmm. As much as you and I like each other?” She could hear the teasing in his voice she looked up at him, glad of the darkness. “Perhaps.”
“I wonder . . . .” his voice trailed off.
What is it you wonder?
“No, nothing, it was impossible.” Curiosity insisted she pursues it. - What was impossible.
“I only thought. . . . . .we never would have met except like this, because of these circumstances. Don’t you think? His voice was low.
“No. I don’t expect we would have.”
“But now, these circumstances. . . .” he frowned thinking.
Yes, she thought. that which had brought them together-these circumstances-were what stopped them from. . . .
Her heartbeat accelerated. “Yes, the circumstances are. . . ” her voice was barely audible above the noise of the train his hands caught her shoulders as the train steadied but he didn’t loosen his grip, She felt her nerves melt beneath his touch, felt the barely concealed longing within her rise up and make her lean into his hands, his eyes were on her she could see them despite the darkness and they were so close It was so dark and they were so alone on the back of a speeding train the knowledge of such privacy squelched the protesting voice inside her.
“What do you want, Mimi?” He asked, his voice husky, his hands not even through the jacket.
She was on the verge of saying it, of asking for what she’d wanted since she stepped out in this platform with him. Her breath came rapidly, and she parted her lips to speak.
“Say it,” he said his grip tightening. 'You have to say it'-Mimi
" kiss me," she said on a hot hoarse breath.
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