I walked into school the following day with Rosie. I didn’t make eye contact with anyone as I made my way to my locker.
Rosie said, looking at me with her eyes full of concern.
“Yeah, of course. Its a real shitty situation. I am literally the worst girl ever.”
I sighed as someone leaned on my locker door, causing it to shut.
He glared at me, his arms folded. He looked furious.
“You have got to be fucking joking me Gretchen. You’ve ditched Luke for that prick? I can’t believe you would do that to him. You know how much he adores you. He could’ve had anyone.”
He looked at me in disgust and walked away, swinging his bag over his shoulder. Rosie stared at the floor. Why didn’t she defend me?
“Come on, lets go to class...” She mumbled, her voice trailing off as we saw Krystal standing at the bottom of the corridor, staring daggers at me. I rolled my eyes and followed Rosie into class. I looked around for Cal, but he wasn’t there. I slid into my seat and tried to avoid the stares from everyone. I got my phone out and texted Cal.
Where are you?
He replied instantly.
Bit of something to deal with at home. I’ll text you later...are you ok?
I texted back furiously,
You aren’t coming in to school?! Cal don’t leave me on my own here- It’s fucking horrible.
I put my phone in my bag and held my hands over my eyes. The door opened and Finn, Ethan and Luke walked in. I looked out of the window, trying not to make eye contact with any of them.. All eyes were on me as Luke sat beside me. I got my books out of my bag causing my phone to drop out between us on the floor. He glanced down and saw the envelope with the name ‘Cal’ on display. His eyes met mine.
“So where is he? Left you to face the music alone? What a lovely guy.”
There were a few sniggers around the class.
“Then again, I don’t suppose he gives a shit about you, or school.”
The teacher cleared her throat. I closed my eyes as I felt tears pricking them. I suppose I deserved that. I opened the text from Cal.
Relief coursed through me, I could not wait to see him. Luke glared at me.
“How could you do this, seriously?” He hissed at me.
“Luke, do you have to, here? I have said I am sorry...”
He pointed at my phone, “Yeah you keep saying. So why are you still fucking texting him?”
The teacher addressed us then, hands on her hips.
“Is everything alright there Romeo & Juliet? If you would like to have a lovers tiff you can do that in your own time.”
Nervous laughter broke out around the room as I felt my cheeks flushing.
“Fuck this.” Luke stood up and stormed out of the class, followed immediately by the teacher. All eyes turned to me.
“This is none of your business, why are you all so fucking involved!” I snapped. I gathered my things up and left the class. Luke was sat on a bench as the teacher walked back towards the class.
“Deal with your trauma, and get your asses back in here. We don’t have time for these ridiculous games. I won’t have it disrupting my class. In here working, or the principals office. Your choice.”
She glared at me, then shook her head as she walked away. I stared at Luke.
“Sorry. Yes. You said. Do me a favour Gretchen and don’t fucking talk to me again. You’ve made your choice.”
He stood up and pushed past me into the class. I sat down on the bench and realised I couldn’t stay in school today. It was too much, too hard. I walked out of the doors and straight into Cal. I fell into his arms, tears falling.
“I can’t do this Cal, its fucking awful. He doesn’t want to speak to me and the whole school hates me.” I sobbed as he wrapped his strong arms around me.
“Come with me.”
He held my hand and took my bag.
“Fuck this shit today. We don’t need it.”
We walked to his car and drove away from the school. I sniffled and stole a glance at him. His hair was messy and his eyes looked tired.
“Are you ok?” I asked, concerned.
He shrugged. “I’m alright, don’t worry about me.”
He pulled into a deserted car park near a crappy diner.
“What happened?” He turned towards me, listening intently as I told him everything.
“Babe if you ever left me I would be fucking angry. If you left me for someone else, well...”
He didn’t finish the sentence, but then he didn’t have to.
“I wouldn’t.” I said firmly.
He tilted his head and looked at me. “No, you wouldn’t. You won’t ever leave me.”
My heart soared as he pulled me over to him.
“Are you mine yet?” He breathed into my neck as he kissed me softly. I kissed him back, unable to believe he wanted me as much as he did.
“Yes.” I breathed. He groaned and kissed me harder.
“Cal,” I pulled away from him and stared into his beautiful green eyes. “I need to go back to school. My parents will kill me if I don’t.”
He nodded. “Whatever you want.”
I moved back to my seat, biting my lip as I stared at him anxiously.
“Are you mad with me?”
He frowned at me as he pulled out of the car park.
“Why would I be mad with you?” He seemed genuinely puzzled.
I felt a flush of embarrassment as I mumbled, “You know...for not....”
“Fucking me in the seat of my car?” He laughed mischievously. “Not at all. It will be worth the wait, I have no doubt.” His hand squeezed my thigh. “Lets go face these fuckers.”
When we got back it was lunch. He squeezed my hand as we walked into school, as he lifted our joined hands up to me.
“Is this ok?” He checked, as I almost burst with happiness.
“Yeah....although I don’t think Luke will....”
Cal put a finger to his lips.
We walked into the canteen and a hush fell. I saw Rosie and Sienna sat with Ethan, Luke and Finn. My heart was in my mouth as Cal and Luke stared at each other. Ethan whispered something to Luke and I saw the hurt in his eyes. I pulled Cal towards a table away from them.
“Cal,” I whispered, “Cal please....”
I tugged his arm and pulled him away from the staring competition he seemed to be in with Luke. Luke stood up and Ethan tried to pull him back down, as Rosie stood up and came over to us, glancing at Cal with clear dislike.
“Gretchen, why don’t you guys leave? Its really raw for Luke right now...”
I stood to leave whilst Cal remained seated.
“Why? She has apologised. She can’t help how she feels.”
His voice was low and strong, making me sit back down beside him. Rosie glared at him, as she licked her lips, preparing to do battle.
“Because its courtesy, CAL. Less than twenty four hours ago Gretchen was his girlfriend, or did that slip your memory?”
Cal fixed his eyes on her bemusedly.
“I’m sorry, I thought you were Gretchens best friend, I didn’t realise you were the president of Lukes fan club.”
Her eyes widened as her mouth dropped open in shock.
“Cal! Rosie, I am sorry, we should go...”
Rosie folded her arms and shook her head, walking back to the table. Why was she being loyal to Luke? I didn’t want to voice this in front of Cal, as I knew he would probably waste no time telling her exactly what a shit friend she was. Luke glared at us, Ethan and now Finn were now sat either side of him.
“Cal, please...” I was aware my voice was pleading with him, I didn’t know what he was capable of and I didn’t want Luke to antagonise him in any way, no matter how wronged he felt. Cal turned and looked at me.
“He will see it sooner or later. He may as well get used to it.”
He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it, my stomach filling with butterflies as his gaze swept over me briefly.
“If you want to go, we will go.”
I nodded pathetically. He swung his legs out and, still holding my hand, he gestured for me to walk ahead of him towards the exit.
Lukes voice rang through the canteen. I froze, my hand gripping Cals. Cal turned slowly.
It felt like the whole school was holding its breath.
Luke stood, flanked either side by Ethan and Finn, who glared at me and Cal.
“You’re welcome to her. She’s frigid as fuck and I’m glad to be rid of her.”
His words cut through me like a knife. Cal didn’t blink, as he tilted his head to the side, studying Luke pitifully. Rosie’s hand flew to her mouth and she stood up in my defence.
‘Luke, you can’t say that..!’
Luke put his hands in the air, ignoring her.
“I’m a single guy now girls. Let the games begin.” He smirked at me directly as he sat down, smiling wickedly as a few whoops went around the canteen.
“Good luck cuz. You will need it.”
Cal turned to me and held my head so I was looking into his eyes.
“Listen to me. He is hurting. He’s behaving like a fucking prick because he has lost you. If you want me to go and deal with him, I will. But I think the fact he hasn’t got you anymore is punishment enough. I really don’t mind punching him in the mouth though, the disrespectful little bastard.”
Cal turned his head sideways towards Luke who seemed to be taunting him by opening his hands out in a beckoning gesture. I shook my head and he put his arm around me and we left the canteen. Rosie ran up behind us, her hand on my arm as I whirled around to face her.
“Hey Gretch, wait up.”
Cal rolled his eyes and pulled out a cigarette as he leaned against a locker.
“Can we have a minute?” She snapped at him.
He looked into my eyes and kissed me softly.
“I’ll be outside.”
I watched him leave longingly.
“Rose please don’t be mad with us, we can’t help it...”
She shook her head. “Listen to me. There are rumours. Bad rumours. You need to be careful. ”
“Rumours? Started by Luke probably.” I said sadly.
“Its his family Gretchen. He wouldn’t spread rumours about Cal, you know how much he values family. Despite the stunt Cal has pulled, Luke isn’t like that.” She hugged me tightly. “I love you Gretch, please be careful.”
She turned and walked back to the canteen.
My mind reeled. What rumours? Where had they started? I realised I knew nothing about Cal really, other than the fact when I was with him everything felt right. The rest of the day passed agonisingly slowly. When I left school Cal was waiting for me by the stairs, as he gazed into the distance. His jaw was clenched as he sighed, and my heart ached for him. I walked over and he pulled me in close, kissing me deeply. I apologised for keeping him waiting.
“As I said earlier, you are worth waiting for.” He breathed. My entire body screamed for him, his touch making me shiver.
“So, what we doing tonight?” I asked in between kisses. A smile played at his lips.
“I have a few ideas...” He murmured as he kissed my forehead softly, his hand dropping to my ass as I gulped nervously.
“We need to work on our presentation...” I reminded him weakly as his arm circled my waist, bringing me close enough to feel his hot breath on my face.
‘Ah yes, therapy. Come to mine now and we will work on our....presentation...’ He laughed and I silenced him by kissing him. I felt giddy I was so happy. I know what Luke had said was hurtful but I also know Cal was right, he was hurting. I followed him to his car to find Luke sitting on the bonnet.
“Get the fuck off my car.” Growled Cal.
Luke jumped down and stood squarely in front of Cal. “See I thought seeing as you was fucking my girlfriend I could sit on your piece of shit car.” He spat angrily. I held Cal, feeling his body tense as he replied.
“She’s not your girlfriend.”
“Oh, but you ARE fucking her?”
Luke pushed Cal and I begged him to stop. “Luke, please don’t.”
He continued as though I hadn’t even spoke. I saw Cals eyes narrowing as he took a deep breath.
“I don’t want to hurt you Luke.” He spoke through gritted teeth.
Luke pushed him again.
“No? You should’ve thought about that last night you slimy bastard.”
He swung his fist out suddenly, connecting with Cals face with a crack. I shrieked and tried to drag Luke away, as he threw me onto the floor.
“This is all your fucking fault. You could’ve said NO!” He hissed. I fell back then, moving backwards as he towered over me, his eyes wide with rage. He turned back to Cal.
“Did she tell you we kissed yesterday? Twice actually.” He sneered. I saw confusion pass over Cal’s face as he registered what he said. I scrambled to my feet and stood close to Cal.
“That’s bullshit and you KNOW it Luke. You kissed me and I kissed you back out of habit, I stopped straight away. It was you that forced yourself on me the second time after I had said no.”
I started to cry, how had this happened?
Cal grabbed Luke then by the throat and held him down over his bonnet.
“I asked you fucking nicely. She doesn’t WANT you. She wants ME. She is MINE. Get that into your fucking skull. If you ever touch her in any way again, I will fucking kill you and no one will find you. Do you understand me?”
He spoke so calmly it frightened me. Lukes hands pulled at Cals, as he strugged to breathe.
“Cal, let him go, let him go!” I screamed, pulling at his arms desperately.
Cal threw him onto the bonnet. “Get the fuck away from us.”
Luke sat up, gasping for breath. He stared at me in horror.
“You chose this? This fucking monster?”
He slid off the bonnet and started to walk away.
“Oh and Luke,” called Cal, “She’s not frigid, not in the slightest.” he smirked as Lukes face fell.
“But you said, Gretch, you said...”
Cal stood in front of me, his eyes glittering dangerously as he glared at me.
“Get in the car. Now.” He barked, his voice shaking with anger as he guided my arm to the passenger door. Tears fell down my face, as I gulped, noticing Cals eye had started to swell and blood was trickling from his lip. He slammed my door shut, moving to the drivers side in record speed. I gazed at his wounds, my hand at my mouth as he shook his head dismissively.
“I’m ok.” He snapped as I put my hand to his face. “So you kissed him?”
He slammed his hand on the steering wheel, turning to face me. “He kissed you, and you fucking kissed him back? You are MINE.” He roared.
Tears fell down my face as I reached for him, despite my terror.
“I did it because I am used to it! It’s a shit reason but it is the truth. I felt NOTHING Cal, and I knew I was doing the right thing leaving him.”
He started the ignition and the car screeched away, causing me to fall into the side of the door. He looked at me in alarm and I held my hand up.
“I’m ok...” I mutter.
“Don’t ever kiss anyone else, ever again. Those lips are mine, you belong to me.”
His voice was husky, and despite the dark tone in his voice, my body felt alive with passion. I should have felt worried, scared or wary but all I felt was content. We drove to his house in silence. As we walked in we saw Alice at the kitchen table drinking a glass of white wine.
“Cal! Honey what happened!”
She barely glanced at me as I followed him in, exhausted from the day. I quickly sent a text to my Mom, telling her I was studying with Cal and that I would be home later. It wasn’t far from the truth, not really. Cal reassured his Mom he was ok and he held his hand out to me.
“Gretchen is...not with Luke anymore.”
Alice gazed at him, her green eyes seeming to mirror his.
“Is that what this is? You had a fight with your cousin over Gretchen?”
I put my head down in shame. Cal ran his hands through his hair.
“She is with me now.”
His mother looked over at me.
“I see. Well if you are happy, I’m happy. But try not to cause any more trouble with your cousin. I’m sure he is hurting quite a bit losing a beautiful girl such as yourself Gretchen.”
I blushed as I smiled. “Thank you Alice. Cal is...amazing.”
She nodded as she saw the two of us exchange a look.
“But we really do have a project to work on. So we will go and do that now if that’s ok.”
Cal muttered and pulled my hand towards the stairs.
His mother sat back down and drained her glass of wine.
‘I hope that girl knows what she is doing.’ She muttered to herself, massaging her temples.
We walked into his room, and he pulled me over to the bed. I kissed him carefully, avoiding his split lip as best as I could.
“I’m so sorry he hit you.” I whispered, my mouth close to his.
He licked his lip, wincing slightly as he shrugged.
“Its ok, you are worth it.”
He stared at me as he ran his hands through my curls and down my body. He continued to kiss me, lying me down on his bed, his hair falling into my eyes.
“I really want you. All of you...” He whispered.
I allowed myself to relax into his arms, unable to fight my bodies desire anymore.
“Cal I haven’t...I haven’t done this before.” I stammered as I felt my hands shake with my nerves.
He stopped and stared at me, frozen temporarily.
“Really? You’ve never slept with anyone?”
He was in total disbelief. I shook my head, biting my lip. His eyes moved to my mouth, before he sat back and exhaled.
“I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to do. I can always have a cold shower you know.” He smiled at me, then grimaced as his lip let out fresh blood. I leaned forward and kissed him.
“I don’t want to wait. I want to be with you in every way possible...”
He pulled me onto his lap.
“I’m not gonna lie, I really find it difficult being with you and not being able to completely fuck you the way I want to.”
I sucked in my breath as he began to slide my top over my shoulders, kissing me softly as I closed my eyes with delight.
‘So do it then.’ I breathed, terrified of what was about to happen, but at the same time feeling incredibly sure it was what I wanted. He was the most beautiful man inside and out, and not fucking him felt wrong. He gazed at me.
‘You’re perfect Gretchen, honest to fucking god. I have never felt this way, ever. But there are some things you need to know about me.....’
I raised my fingers to his mouth and said, ′ This first. Therapy after yeah?′
He laughed then, climbing onto the bed with me, kissing me so hard I could taste his blood in my mouth.
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