“I don’t think that what you are trying is very wise.” I glare at the guys and throw the money at him.
“It’s a good thing I didn’t ask you then! Now give me my stuff and let me leave.” Shocked, they guys stands frozen for a moment before reaching into his bag and handing me the stuff I bought.
“Thank you.” I then left the store and peered into the bag getting an uneasy feeling in my stomach.
Am I sure about this? Is it something that I really want to do? To finally say goodbye?
I then took a deep breath and closed the bag before putting it into my back pack and walking to my car.
When I got inside, I put my bag on the seat next to me and looked over at the picture on my dashboard “four weeks, love. Four weeks and although it still brings me to tears every time,” I take a deep breath and look up to will away my tears.
“It is getting better.” I smile sadly and put my finger softly next to Ava’s cheek in the picture. Feeling her cheek under my hand.
I smile up at the picture and start my car. I listen to the loud roar of the engine and smile pleased before I back out of the parking space and leave.
I drive in silence the whole way with nothing but my thoughts to haunt me. I stop at every stop and go whenever I should.
Soon, I stop at the final robot and find myself deep in thought.
Would it have been the same if Averly and I’s positions were swapped around? Would I have told her my plans?
Would I have planned something like this? Would Ava be on the verge of death because of losing me?
The questions never end.
Why was she the sick one in the first place?
All these questions and all these thoughts. They haunt me every passing second.
What would our life together have been like? Our children?
I put my foot on the gas and go while imagining a child of ours running around. Suddenly, I hear a loud horn and look left to see a huge truck coming my way.
Panic immediately fills me and I freeze in my seat, while watching this truck coming right at me, yet he looks like he may stop in time.
The last thing I think is: maybe if I die, I will see her.
Averly’s mom’s p.o.v.
“Don’t cut the gas pipes you idiot!” I yell at the TV. while watching Wild Hogs. This is what keeps me calm.
Watching stupid movies where I can think of how stupid they are instead of how I am not at the hospital where my Ava should be.
It has been four weeks and if I don’t keep myself distracted, I might just want to do something to myself.
It was such a great surprise when Jonathan phoned me and said he wanted to come over today, I actually showered and I cooked.
If it wasn’t for him, then I would be completely alone. I am expecting at any moment and pause the T.V. when I hear the doorbell ring.
He is here.
I haven’t seen or heard from Jonathan since the funeral and by the way he sounded on the phone, I knew for a fact that be wasn’t coping and I know what is constantly going on in his mind.
I then make my way to the door and plaster a smile on my face. However, my smile immediately falls when I see who it is.
“What do you want here?” Dr. Dimitri stands with sadness in his eyes and a teddy bear in his hands “I am so sorry.”
I cross my arms “I just came from the hospital and I needed to come speak to you in person.”
I shake my head and as I am about to tell him to leave, I am cut off “you better get out of here and go carry on ruining lives right now!”
I look over and smile at Jonathan who comes and stands next to me protectively. “You have no right to be here when you did what you did.”
He shakes his head “I did nothing wrong, she had the right to refuse treatment and I did try to convince her otherwise.”
I shake my head and grab the teddy beat while ordering Jonathan to go inside my home. “Leave Dimitri.”
I then turn around and slam the door shut in his face “how are you doing?” Jonathan asks as I turn around.
“Fine, why?” He raises an eyebrow and point at me “you have bags under your eyes.”
I nod and point at him “you too.” He nods at my allegation “I know, I feel like every breath I take is a waste of time.”
Immediately my stance softens and I walk toward him and then give him a hug. “It’s okay my boy.”
I comfort him with tears in my eyes and him hugging me with his tears falling onto my shoulder “I just miss her so much! I thought that it was getting better, but I saw her in my thoughts and then it all started to fall apart again.”