Out of the Light

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Ten | Cleo

It had been days since I last saw Terrin. After he had burst into my house and warned me not to look for him, he was gone. Coda had left that same night and now I was alone.

Sebastian and I couldn't even continue on as normal because he was still trying to wrap his head around everything he'd learned. So naturally I did what I did best these days and I let my work consume me.

I had killed over five people in the span of a week, not willing to let myself rest and allow myself to worry. Terrin would be fine, he could take care of himself well enough. Besides, I knew that Syn wouldn't let him be unprotected while in harm's way. It was also because if this that I didn't bother to look for Terrin. My werewolf friend knew as well as I that if we made contact there would be a high likelihood of a lycan catching wind that I was very much alive.

My scent would stick to Terrin which was why he was always very cautious of ridding himself of my scent whether that meant making contact with many others to muddle my scent or by spraying himself down with perfumes and other scents to overpower my own. I had to do the same after each visit with Terrin. Not only did I not want a certain lycan catching wind of me while thinking I was his mate, but I didn't need my cliental to know about my collaborative work with Terrin. We were both well known and our services were highly sought after but we didn't need people linking us together as that would only create trouble.

It was late one night that I came home, not having been lucky enough to escape the heavy down pour of the storm. I headed straight for the bathroom upon my arrival, needing a good soak to flush out the icy chill that seeped into my bones. What I didn't expect when I approached the bathroom, was for the door to be closed, the light to be turned on as evident from the glow coming out from under the bathroom door and the sound of sunning water.

The door was unlocked so I gently pushed it open, taking a step into the bathroom.

Sebastian was standing under the running water, his forehead pressed against fist that was resting on the tiled wall. I could tell he was deep in thought, going through something that was weighing him down. I should have approached him, I should have talked to him and offered comfort but that just wasn't who I was anymore.

I exited the bathroom, padding back down the stairs into the kitchen to make myself a hot cup of tea. While I filled the teapot, I wondered what had brought Sebastian here. We had been on a break I guess and I hadn't seen him since the day he found out about Hakota. He needed time to mull it over and I was more than happy to give it to him.

Turning on the stovetop, I let the water start heating and leaned against the counter as I waited. It wasn't long before I heard the bathroom door open and heard the light footfalls as he made his way downstairs. He spotted me standing in the middle of the kitchen and halted in place. I could see him weighing his option as he though about his next move.

Making up his mind, he came into the kitchen and grabbed a mug from the cabinet and then filed through the variety tea bags in the bucket on the counter. He waited for the water to boil and then poured it into the mug, tossing in the lemon and ginger teabag and let it steep. My eyes followed him to the fridge where he pulled out the milk and splash a tablespoon into the mug just the way I liked it. He handed me the mug and leaned against the opposite counter, crossing his arms.

I set the mug down as it was too hot to drink and met the werewolf's eyes. Sebastian's dark hair was still wet and looked like a haystack because of the way he had rubbed at it with the towel. He had thrown on a white t-shirt and some sweatpants, the drawstrings of which remained untied.

I waited for him to speak his mind, allotting him all the time he needed to gather his thoughts.

"I'm going to be completely honest with you," he started off. "I was really pissed that you lied to me about your mate," he admitted, "but I lied to you about not being part of the Lunars so I guess I can't really hold it against you."

"You joined the Lunars?" I questioned. I had always know there was more to it than he let on but Sebastian was a terrible liar so I was quite surprised he had been able to lie to me about his involvement.

"No," he shook his head, "I was with them from day one, before we even met. I'm actually one of the leaders of the intelligence and spy network we have set up."

"Oh," I replied because that was really all I could say. "So are you going to inform the Lunars about me or get word to Hakota that I'm still alive?" It was a simple question on my part. My voice was bland, no anger or fear present through my tone.

Sebastian clicked his tongue and after a moment he exhaled a breath, "...no."

I rose a brow in curiosity, wondering what his reasoning for that was. It wasn't like we loved each other or were anything close to true mates. We had a dysfunctional relationship because I was a dysfunctional person. "Why not?"

The werewolf seemed shocked by my question. "Why not? Rala, I'm not going to use you like a pawn or put you in danger. I want your support and help, yes, but I want you to do that of your volition."

"Well, that's awfully thoughtful of you considering I had no qualms about lying to you about Hakota and therefore putting you in immense danger if he were to ever find out about us," I said gesturing between us.

Sebastian pursed his lips, "Yeah, thanks for that reminder." I shrugged and picked up my mug, blowing on it in an attempt to make it cool faster. "Rala, I know we agreed on a physical relationship, a give and take sort of thing, but I still care about you. More than I should, grant it, but I can't turn off my feelings."

I sighed, "Sebastian–"

"No, let me finish." I clamped my lips shut as per his request. "Rala," he began, "I know you can't return my feelings and that you probably never will, but now I get why. When Hakota hurt you that day he damaged you in more ways than one. You have a half broken bond and a lot of emotions to accompany it. I know you have to shut it off in order to survive and I will never hold that against you. I will continue with the way things are between us, but only if you are certain this is what you want. If this is going to hurt you in the end I need you to be honest with yourself and tell me."

My fingers tightened around the mug as I stared down at the water watching as the steam wafted up. "Why do you think our relationship would hurt me?" I finally asked. Then looking up I said, "What happened with Hakota has been long buried. He made his choice and I made mine. So why would I let one chapter in my life ruin the rest of my story?"

"I don't known." He sighed, "Don't you feel like you're...cheating on him?"

I scoffed, bringing the mug to my lips. "There was that whole part where he ripped out my throat and told me something about being his biggest regret and greatest lesson, so no. I can't really say I feel that way. Besides, he slept with someone even though he knew about me being his mate, I'd say this makes us even if anything." I took a sip relishing the way the hot water burned down my throat.

"As long as you're sure," Sebastian said.

"You're really not mad at me?" I asked, setting down my tea.

He pushed off the counter and came over to me, brushing a strand of my semi dry hair behind my ear. With a sad smile he answered, "I wish you had just told me but I understand why you didn't." He then wrapped me in a hug, kissing the side of my head before pulling away.

I cleared my throat, a little thrown off by his action of affection. "Thank you, for willing to keep my secret for me." And I was thankful because if he told me he wasn't going to keep my secret I would have killed him then and there. I would never be able to hide from Hakota if he knew I was alive. By thinking I was dead he was searching for the people he thought had my body but the moment he started looking for me, breathing and living I was doomed. He would find me, no matter what corner of the world I hid in, or how far I ran, he would find me.

"Yeah," he ran a hand down his face and I knew then that this was not the end. "While we are being completely honest with each other, I found something out today that you probably are not going to like."

I crossed my arms, taking note of the way Sebastian tensed and the strain in his voice. I braved myself for the worst, waiting for him to tell me that Hakota knew about me anyway or that Coda had been caught by my mate and killed. What he said though was worse, so much worse.

"The lycans took Terrin before we could get to him. Terrin was going to help us, he was going to tell us everything he knew about the lycans because he didn't want them ever getting to you and hurting you again." Sebastian ran a hand through his hair. "He must have had the lycans tailing him because all the Lunars he was supposed to meet with were dead and he was gone. I'm sorry Rala."

I turned away from him running a hand down my face, tugging at my hair as I absorbed this information. That idiot, that stupid dumbass moron was going to get himself killed. There was a reason Syn didn't take him back to the pack, there was a reason Syn didn't bring him to Hakota.

I knew Syn, and I knew he probably told Hakota about Terrin being his mate, but he also probably told Hakota that he wanted to do this on his own terms without any help. Hakota would have respected his wishes as long as Terrin didn't prove himself to be a liability but now that brainless twat had given the lycans every cause to take him.

And mate to Syn or not, I knew enough about Hakota's current predicament and the rumors of his insanity to understand that if Terrin ever let anything slip about me being alive, he would be as good as dead.

"I'm going back to the Lunar Kingdom," Sebastian told me, his deep voice cutting into my thoughts. "I know this is bad timing but maybe we can rally some help to get Terrin back. There's nothing to be done here."

He was right, this city had long been conquered by the lycans and most of the people had accepted their rule and lived their lives quietly. It was why I had chosen to live here. But was I going to selfishly stay here and leave Terrin in Fate's hands? She'd been rather cruel as of late so I didn't really trust her to take care of Terrin.

"Are you coming with me Rala? The lycans have enough, they don't need the Lunar kingdom too. People are dying, innocent people. Hakota doesn't care who he hurts or the blood that is spilled. Come with me and help me find a way to compromise with them. Terrin needs you, we all need you."

I sucked on the inside of my cheek fighting an inner battle with myself.

Fate obviously wasn't going to allow me to just sit here and live out my days, and I couldn't allow Terrin to become another causality in this war. Raising my eyes to meet those of my lover's I nodded my consent.

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