Chapter 1
Hello. Thank you for starting this story. This story is set after "Love After Rejection" Which is available for FREE on Kindle Unlimited. However, you do not need to read that book to read this one. This book is set five years later and can be read as a stand alone. The book is complete, however only the first five chapters will be readable on Inkitt. The full book will be edited and free on Kindle Unlimited. Until then, Thank you for all the support and please enjoy reading.
Flicker
I’m not much for roll call. I’m not much for anything that involves my name being called at all. My name isn’t an ordinary name. I don’t know why my parents gave it to me and I don’t know why I haven’t legally had it changed yet.
“Flicker Danes?” The professor called and of course, I sighed and raised my hand.
“Here. And you can just call me Fil.” I told the professor just like I had been telling everyone in my life since I was six years old.
“Fil?” he questioned and looked down at my name. “As in P-H-I-L? Which is short for Philip?” Ah, he was one of those. Okay then.
“Well I spell it F-I-L but, I won’t ever spell it on my papers. I just prefer to be called Fil.” I explained to him and everyone else in the class for what I’m sure wouldn’t be the first time today or at all this semester.
“That’s a little unorthodox, don’t you think?” Professor Wiles said taking off his glasses and cleaning them with his shirt. “Why not just got by your middle name if you don’t like being called by your first name?” he put his glasses back on and looked down at the roll sheet. “It says here your middle name is...” he paused and seemed to be at a loss for words. Yup, that seems about right. “Your middle name is Lux? Your parents named you Flicker Lux?” The class didn’t erupt in laughter but they did all chuckle. Ah, college: where we are so much more respectful than high school.
“Mmhmm.” I nodded. “So, Fil?”
“Right, very well then.” He jotted something on the paper presumably next to my name. “Moving right along...Timothy Drake?”
And that was pretty much how every class went. Maybe changing schools my second year of college wasn’t that bright of an idea, but this school was much more affordable and it seemed to have ties to some werewolf Alpha, so they don’t discriminate towards my kind. I’m a half-werewolf so I could still shift.
Not all of my siblings can, though. We have three sets of triplets in my family and then me. The sole, non-clone, normal child, if that’s how you want to put it, of the family, and I was the first to shift. I’m also the youngest. Not that we have that much of an age difference. My oldest siblings are only 4 years older than me.
Somehow, my mom got super unlucky, though some would call it lucky, and got pregnant with triplets two months after each set was born. That’s right, my mom and dad had three sets of triplets right after the other. And then there was me. Their normal child. Their normal pregnancy. Their FLICKER of light. Hence the Goddess-Forsaken name “Flicker Lux”. I am my parents light.
It didn’t help matters that I shifted when I was twelve. It also didn’t help matters that when I shifted, I had strange markings on my fur that resembled faces. Now, I say that very loosely. They resembled faces if you squinted with one eye and didn’t look out the other. But of course, my marking did look like circles which lead my siblings to say that they were faces, which lead them to say that I really was born a triplet and I just devoured them in the womb.
Siblings—amirite?
But my wolf was still a nice color. It...didn’t help that my wolf’s fur was a russet red color like that of a fox. Completely red, meaning I had no other markings anywhere on my fur, around my eyes or ears, unless you counted the “faces”.
My wolf is also male.
There’s the big kicker and another check mark you can add onto my list of oddities.
Which, due to my siblings already teasing me about the “faces” in my fur, I never did tell anyone. But it didn’t take long for them and my parents to find out. So, we had to move before anyone caught wind of that little tidbit hanging from my legs. I’m not exactly sure if it is normal. But I know that nothing in my life is normal. The whole reason we are here adds on to the not normal.
The past year has been a hard one. I found my mate last year after most of my siblings had already found theirs. Since I am was only 19 at the time, I wasn’t really going around looking for my mate. I was never excited about the thought of being tied down at such young age to a guy I only looked at then instantly fell in love with. My parents said, that with them, since my mom is human, she didn’t feel the pull so my dad had to date her and win her over. My dad said that it was torture every second he was away from her. My dad is a drama queen.
Anyway, when I actually did find my mate, I finally understood what my dad meant. Or, at least I kind of did. I was with my siblings and a few of their mates at a club when I felt a weird pull towards this guy. He must have felt the same pull because he turned towards me. We introduced ourselves, chatted, laughed, danced, and everything went well. Everything went well until I decided to tell him, the man who was supposed to be my other half of my soul, my secret. We went outside to the back of the club where we could be alone and in private. Maybe that was a mistake.
My mate didn’t like the fact that my wolf was a male. He thought I was a male pretending to be a female, which in itself was a stupid notion considering how our kind cannot hide our sex from each other. Unless we shifted, we couldn’t tell what someone’s wolf was thought. My shifted wolf lasted against my siblings because they were young but my wolf never could fool my dad which meant he couldn’t fool any wolf. The same goes for us in our human form. Its not possible to hide our gender, even if we wanted to. So, his notion was just stupid.
That lead to him rejecting me, which I stupidly didn’t expect. It hurt. It was like my heart had been dipped in boiling lava and then the skin had been pealed off. He felt it too because he fell to his knees in front of me. Once he caught his breath, he grabbed me by the neck and tried to choke me. He blamed me for everything. Said I was some sort of abomination. That he was going to make sure me and my family paid for everything.
But I wasn’t about to let that happened and neither was my wolf. I let my body go limp and gave over full control to my wolf. He came out roaring and held nothing back. He shifted so fast, I don’t think my mate—ex mate— expected it.
He was dead within seconds.
Of course, after that, we had to move again. What saved us is that everyone was looking for a male scent that was left all over my ex-mate’s body. Lucky for me, my wolf and I don’t share the same scent. Another oddity. Yay me.
My oldest sibling, Christopher and his mate Jen were the only ones who didn’t make the move with us. They stayed because they wanted to warn us if anything was ever sent our way.
Before all this happened, we always stayed together. Each move we made, or I forced them into, my parents, siblings, and even their mates, never complained. Before this last move, I told them I would go alone. They didn’t have to come with me. They didn’t have to be rogues or unattached wolves like me. But they each told me one thing: family sticks together. It what they told me when we had to move the first time and every time after.
I was sure Christopher and Jen would come to be with us once things died down but it’s been a year and they still say it hasn’t and they can’t explain why. When they looked up my mate, they couldn’t find any information about him. Christopher said he asked around about him as subtly as he could but no one was talking. They were keeping everything about his death and identity very hush-hush.
I shook my head as I trotted to my car. I was about twenty feet away when I noticed a man with was messing with my tire. I paused assessing the situation. I inhaled deeply and could tell the man was a wolf but what was he doing to my car? I was about to ask when I heard a girl behind me snicker.
“Is that Wyatt Lennon?” she asked. Her voice was low so I don’t think she meant for anyone else to hear. I didn’t need to inhale to know this person wasn’t a wolf. If she was then she would know that everything she said this Wyatt person could hear. With that thought in mind, I turned to this girl not sensing anyone else with her. She was definitely talking to me. I gave her a shrug in response. She leaned closer as if she wanted to tell me a secret. “Don’t waste your time on him, he’s a broken man. I don’t think he even smiles.”
Ouch. Well that wasn’t a nice thing to say at all.
“Uh...” I said at a loss for words.
“It’s just, I saw you looking at him and I wanted to warn you. He hangs around campus a lot but he never hooks up with any of the girls...or the guys. Some say he failed all his classes while his friends graduated last year. I heard that he likes to fight in an underground fight club. I heard this one story that he had this girl he loved and she dumped him for a billionaire and now he blackmails them to pay for college.”
“What is he using to blackmail them?” I asked humoring her because her stories seemed flighty at best.
“That their baby...the baby isn’t really theirs but his and his ex’s. He’s saying he’ll go public with the info.”
“Fascinating.” I said. I didn’t believe it mainly because I don’t think there were any “billionaires” in this area. We were practically in the middle of no where and not the middle of no where that you go when you have money and want to be left alone.
“Yeah,” she nodded with a pitying look on her face. “It’s really sad.” I guess to her, fascinating and sad meant the same thing.
“You seem to know a lot about him.” I mused and her cheeks flushed.
“Yeah well, you see, I was new like you once and like you, I thought I could fix him. I just wanted to give you a heads up since no one gave me one. He’s not fixable so don’t waste your time.”
I gave her a faux pitying look. “You poor thing.” I said with exaggeration as I placed my hands over my heart. “You feel the need to fix people when you should really start with yourself.” I tuned, heading for my car and heard her give me a shocked gasped.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you!” she called out before I heard her turn and walk hastily back the way she came.
“Hey,” I said to this Wyatt guy. “What are you doing to my car?” He wasn’t facing me but he answered me without preamble.
“Your tire looked a bit too loose. I’m just tightening it as much as I can before you can get to a mechanic.” I stared at his back for a long time letting his faint scent of warm gingerbread cookies and maybe pine settle around me. His scent seemed muted.
What’s up with his wolf? This isn’t what a broken wolf feels like. I asked my wolf.
It’s sad. He answered. And lonely. It needs a friend. He pawed at me trying to get me to make a move. Sometimes my wolf was so childish.
No. I don’t need any friends. I have my family and that’s it. It’s all we need.
Just one?
No. He won’t keep our secret.
“That’s not a very blackmaily, thing to do. They might throw you out of fight club for doing something so nice.”
He turned his head back to look over his shoulder at me. A grin was plastered on his face. I gasped, clutching my chest in shock. I swayed and placed my hand on my car’s hood for support.
“They all said you didn’t smile!” I breathed. “I’ve been given false information. How am I supposed to get to fight club now?” He chuckled and turned back to the tire using his tools to tighten whatever needed tightening. Then he got up and dusted his pants.
“All done.” He said. This guy was tall, dark and handsome. His hair was looks like soft blond silk and his eyes were the color of blue ice. I don’t know why his wolf was so sad but I had to assume it probably had to do with him losing a mate. I hope I wouldn’t end up like that. I may never find that happiness again...
“Thanks.” I muttered suddenly saddened by the idea of never having a mate because I killed mine.
“Thank you for not believing what she said.” He said and I shrugged. He stuck out his hand and I took it, shaking it. “My names Wyatt. Do you belong to a pack? I haven’t seen you here before.”
“No, we just moved here. My family and I aren’t rogues really we’re just unattached lone wolves.”
“Hence the definition of rogue.”
“OH, I forgot you failed all your classes! I should really listen to you and your smarts.”
“So, what’s your name?” he laughed again.
“It’s...Fil.” I said slowly dragging out the L a little longer than I meant to. He cocked an eyebrow at that.
“Phil?” he asked dubiously.
“I feel like you’re saying it with a PH but no, just an F.” he looked like he didn’t believe me and was going to call me on that when I spoke first. “So, do you know any mechanics around here? I should get my car to one if it’s going to get fixed before tomorrow. He seemed to be mulling over my question when he finally nodded. Bending down to grab his tool kit, he rummaged inside before he grabbed a business card that had seen better days.
“They’re pretty close to campus and if you tell them I sent you they’ll give you a discount.”
“Thanks!” I said grabbing the card. I looked at it and began tying the address into my phone’s GPS. It was about ten minutes from campus and on the way home. I could drop my car off then call either Chandler or Ricky to come pick me up. “Nice meeting you.” I said unlocking my car door. He looked like he wanted to say more but I cut him off again. “Thanks again for fixing my car. I hope it doesn’t break down on the way to the shop.” I saluted him as I closed my car door, turned on my car and began to back out. I know it was pretty mean, but I didn’t want to risk my family moving again because of something I did.
This guy was a wolf. No matter how sad his wolf was, I wasn’t going to hang around him. Friends were something I couldn’t do. Friends aren’t family. They betray you and they won’t keep your secrets. The second you tell them you’re different, they see you in a different light that only shines on the bad things.
I don’t need another friend.
I have my family.
They are enough.
They’ll always be enough.
