I didn’t think it was possible for her to be any more gorgeous than she was at this moment wrapped around my body. Her face rested gently on my chest. Her hair was splayed across her face falling over my arm that wrapped around her body. Soft snores came from her parted lips. I’m pretty sure she was drooling on me but I really didn’t mind. She was beautiful either way. Occasionally her body would twitch from whatever dream she was having. She looked peaceful, happy. Out of all the times that I’ve watched her sleep this was the only time I had seen her look comfortable, and relaxed. I hated that it was coming. The inevitable.
I had let her sleep for a few hours now not wanting to separate her body from mine. I wanted to soak up every warmth her body offered my cold, dark one. But it was getting later in the afternoon and the final preparations needed to take place. All I wanted to do was close my eyes and wake up next to her, never having left her side. Maybe make dinner together, cuddle up and watch a movie. But that couldn’t be our life. At least it couldn’t be our life until Dominic was out of the way. I needed to do this, for her.
My head lifted off the pillow momentarily to release my arm that rested behind my neck. I pulled her small frame tighter to my chest using both of my arms wrapping one around her waist and the other around her shoulders. I didn’t want any space left between us. My lips found her forehead giving her a small kiss holding my lips on her forehead as my eyes squinted shut tightly as I another unfamiliar feeling rose up inside of me. It was something i had never really felt before she came into my life, fear and sadness. I swallowed causing my adam’s apple to bounce up and down. My lips pulled away so my chin could rest on her forehead, my nose nuzzled in her hair. I didn’t want to forget her scent. It was sweet, almost like flowers, roses maybe. She was the complete opposite of me. She was always so gently , so caring. I was harsh, and unforgiving. How the hell did she fall in love with me? Me? She deserved so much more than me. But I was going to be damned if I was going to let anyone else have her. She was mine, and I was hers from day one.
I gently pulled her body out from under mine. Her lips closed at the movement causing her pouty lips to turn into a flat line, almost like she was scowling in her sleep. Her eyelids tightened making her little wrinkles show up on either side of her eyes. I hated to admit it, but she was always kind of cute when she was mad. Not that I liked to piss her off, but when she was made I found myself refraining from laughing. She always thought she was tougher than she actually was. It was kind of adorable. But now I was far from laughing. I was afraid that she was waking up and I would be forced to wipe away her tears again as I knew she was going to go into a full panic mode when she realizes I’m leaving.
I knew I would always be there to dry her tears. But I hated it when I was the one that was causing them. Even if I wasn’t doing something to directly cause her tears. I was causing her to worry and that was just as horrendous. I understood her concern though. She finally admitted that she loved me and I would be damned if I didn’t keep my promise to make it back to her. I didn’t want her crying anymore than what she had already done. She deserved a life full of joy, full of accomplishments, full of anything and everything positive. She had been through enough of a hell. She had the damn scars to prove it. I would ensure that even in my dying breath that her life would never go back to that dark hole. She was far too beautiful inside and out to be forced in a life like that.
My body had finally become successfully free of hers as she cuddled her body into the pillows. I covered her shoulders with the blanket and brushed a lone strand of hair out of her face making her nose crinkle up as the strand tickled her skin. I didn’t want to leave her but I knew I had to. It was the only way for her to live a life that she deserved. Dominic was never going to stop. He had always been that way, acting like a toddler having a tantrum until he got what he wanted. He needed to be stopped. Someone needed to stop him. Addi deserved to finally feel free to live her life and make the choices she wanted to without living in fear.
Carefully I walked into the closet grabbing one of the few suits I had left at the loft in case I ever found myself in need. I grabbed the hangers ripping each article of clothing off of them, the pair of shoes I needed, a tie from the many drawers, socks, and my underwear. I tipped toed through the room silently unlatching the door to escape from her ear shot into the master bedroom to get dressed while she slept.
I stood in the bathroom, staring at myself in the mirror as memories surfaced from hours ago. My damn name escaping her lips in moans. Damn it. Her fingers digging into my skin as her body clenched around my fingers. The sweet taste of her lips pressed against mine. If she would have been any other girl I would have had my way with her, pinning her down and doing what I pleased. But Addi, that girl. She was changing me. I didn’t want this to be some random fuck. No, I knew it wasn’t going to be like that the first time it happened. I knew that Addi had enough bad experiences with intimacy. I wasn’t going to cause another hell for her. She didn’t need to beat herself up more than she already has. She told me she was ready but I could read her body language. She still guarded herself as small flinches would surface at touches that reminded her of them. I don’t think she ever realized she was doing it. Her body just reacted without her consent. I wanted her mind to be free of any thoughts of them completely before anything happened between us. I wanted her to feel like she was giving herself to me and only me, not to them. I knew not to push her even though what I wanted was to taste her, every... Damn... part... of her. Just like I know the minute she finally gives in to me, the moment she is finally ready, I am going to lose my damn fucking mind. I know it’s going to be an experience unlike either of us have had before.
I slipped my arms into my white button down shirt, buttoning each button meticulously, attempting to pushing any thoughts of her fucking amazing body out of my head. The more I thought about her, the more I knew I was never going to leave this damn place. Leaving the top two buttons undone on my shirt I wrapped the dark grey tie around my neck, flipping it onto itself quickly tucking and pulling through making the knot. I buttoned the remaining buttons and tightened the tie. I slipped my arms through the light grey suit jacket I had picked out buttoning the first button over my white shirt. I don’t know why the hell I was looking all professional for when the suit was just going to be ruined with blood later tonight. I slid on my neatly polished black, leather shoes finishing of the look.
Well, this is it. Time to go. I thought to myself, dreading the inevitable. I walked back over to my room where hopefully she still slept peacefully, undisturbed. I walked on the balls of my feet, attempting to quiet the clack of the dress shoes. I opened the door to my room slowly to dull the occasional creek the door made. There she was. Right where I left her. I leaned my shoulder against the frame of the door placing my hands into my pockets for the time being afraid of what my hands were going to do if I left them free to roam. Part of me wanted her to be awake. I wanted her to beg me not to go so I would have an excuse to back out and do this another day. But part of me wanted to get this done and over with. All I wanted was to lay in bed next to her in sweatpants and her in her cute pjs, her back cuddled against my chest with my arms wrapped around her waist. But this needed to be done so we could have countless nights and mornings just like that.
I couldn’t help myself. Without hesitation or control my feet started moving under me like some kind of invisible force drawing me toward her. I stood over her peaceful body staring at her small frame seemingly looking smaller than usual lying alone in a king size bed. Her eyes fluttered back and forth under her eyelids dreaming, hopefully of something bringing her joy. Lord knows she was going to need it before she woke up to see me gone. The palm of my hand cupped her cool cheek bring a little warmth back into it. I planted another small kiss on her forehead letting my lips linger on her skin longer than I should have.
Whispering my lips moved against her skin, “I love you Addi Elizabeth. Don’t forget that. I promise you I’ll come back. I promise that someday soon you won’t have to wake up to an empty bed. I promise someday I’m going to show you everything you deserve and so much more. I will show you what it means to be loved. Someday Addilynn Elizabeth, I swear I’m going to make you my whole life.” And at the last of my words my thumb ran over her soft lips before placing my own lightly over hers regretting not waking her up to say goodbye.
I stepped cautiously to the door closing it lightly not latching it completely. The minute I stepped away from her my face hardened. My eyebrows furrowed causing wrinkles to build up just above my nose. My lips drew into a flat line. I grabbed my keys off the island shoving them into my pants pocket. I was fucking angry. Angry at the fact that I had this perfect moment, this perfect day ripped away from me because some asshole wants to ruin her life more than he already has. I wasn’t pissed at her. It was him, Dominic.
Quickly I swung the front door open, preparing to leave. Joe one of my most trusted guards stood watch outside of the door in the hallway. If I had to leave her with anyone besides my brothers it would be him.
“Good evening Sir.” He always addressed me as Sir. It drove me fucking nuts, but at the same time I knew he meant it as a sign of respect. I rolled my eyes in annoyance. It was just another reminder that I couldn’t stay hidden away with her from this life I built. I was always going to be sir or boss. There was no getting out of this mafia shit. My family had been in it for their whole lives. And just like my grandfather did to my dad my dad did to me, to us. He trained us, prepared us, gave us the responsibility to take over the business once he was gone. Part of me understood, but part of me loathed him for it.
“Joe, I told you. No Sirs. It annoys the fuck out of me. Listen to me. I have a shit storm happening tonight. I need you to keep her here, understand? Under no circumstances can she leave.”
“Yes s-” He stopped mid sir gulping down the remainder of the word I didn’t want to hear. “Sorry, boss.”
“Better.” I started to walk down the hall towards the elevator. I turned my head slightly over my shoulder “I mean it Joe. She’s going to try to con her way into leaving. Don’t fucking let her leave.”
“Got it boss.”
I stepped into the elevator taking one final look at the front door with Joe standing guard. My stomach dropped feeling like it was intertwining with my intestines. I already had enough to worry about with shit about to hit the fan tonight. I didn’t want to worry about her. But all I could do was worry about her. Worry about whether I was going to see those dark, gentle eyes of hers peer into mine like she was trying to break down every damn wall I had built up. Worry about whether or not I was going to get to kiss those lips again, and feel her hair stand on end at my touch. Or hear her soft voice speak beautiful, effortless words. I worried knowing she was going to wake up to me gone. I knew she was going to be fucking livid with me. But I was only trying to do what was best for her.
What the fuck was she doing to me? Any other mission like this I would have been jacked, prepared for anything without a fucking care in the world. Now all I could think of was the girl who now lays in my bed. I never use to think of anyone else besides myself and my damn family. Now she was part of this crazy ass family and had my thoughts so fucking consumed with her face.
A short trip in the elevator brought me back to the garage where multiple cars were parked. I was feeling a little bit bolder than usual, if that was at all possible. It was time to bring out something other than my normal ride. If I was going to kick it tonight I needed to drive something a little more dangerous than my SUV. A little good luck tonight wouldn’t hurt either..
Sitting backed in the corner of the garage away from the rest of my cars was my rarely used pristine finished, bright red beauty; my two doors, 730 horsepower, sleek designed Ferrari F12 Berlinetta. God this thing could fucking purr. I opened her up, sliding into the the driver side placing the key into the ignition. I gently pulled the door shut wiggling in my spot until I found the most comfortable position. I didn’t know what it was about a goddamn expensive ass, beautifully made sports car but it made me feel like one hell of a nefarious son of a bitch. One had gripped on to the steering wheel feeling the cool, perfectly stitched leather under my fingers, while the other hand found the clutch. Revving the engine I pulled the beast out of the stall, bringing it out of the garage and pulling into the street. I glanced up to the rearview mirror seeing my eyes turn sinister, evil, like the cars power was coursing through my veins. A wicked smile crossed my lips. I didn’t care if it was mid day. I didn’t care if what I was about to do was illegal and put others at risk. I was going to drive as fast and as reckless as I possibly could. Why the hell not? I mean now was as good of a time as any. After all, this could be the last night I have left to feel that kind of adrenaline from the power and speed this car has to offer.
A/n: What do you guys think so far? What do you think is going to happen? Make sure to comment, vote and follow!