A/N: more adult content and language. Honestly, this chapter is purely smut. Feel free to pass up.
My eyes fluttered open at the sound of his heavy breathing. I knew he must have been exhausted, not getting any sleep the last few days and with everything that we had been through. I myself had only managed to get a few hours of sleep the past few nights and given our recent “activity” I was more than exhausted as well.
My body ached. My hip joints throbbed and muscles I didn’t know could be sore screamed with even the slightest movement. I wasn’t entirely surprise that I had fallen asleep shortly after curling up next to his chest. Clearly both of us needed it. By the looks of the sun hitting the window it was still mid afternoon. Meaning I had at least caught up on an hour or so of sleep. But it wasn’t nearly enough to settle my heavy eyelids.
He lay on his side next to me, his arm draped over my tiny frame. His chest was at my eye level while his chin rested on the top of my head. I nuzzled my face into his body wanting no space left between us. My arm snaked under his, grabbing a hold of his back not wanting to ever let go. Wafts of his sharp fougère cologne brushed against my nose causing me, by some instinct, to pull my body closer to his. I wanted to be consumed by it, by him.
I tilted my head up to look at his face. All I felt was an overwhelming sense of love. Honestly it felt a little like I wanted to vomit all of my feelings out. For the first time in as long as I could remember I was happy. No, not just happy. Ecstatic. Loved. Relieved. Safe. It made my heart race at the thought of finally having everything I never imagined I would have.
I could only stare at him for so long. I could feel my eyes bounce back and forth upon his face. He looked peaceful, truly. I had gotten used to seeing him as two entirely different people. He had two personalities; one for work and a completely separate one for me and occasionally his siblings. But now his face was an empty slate waiting for the day to decide which personality he would have to choose between.
His eyes twitched under his eyelids. He parted his lips letting out soft breaths. My hand gently brushed over his arm moving towards his face. It was second nature to cup his face with the palm of my hand. The pad of my thumb caressed his cheek causing him to turn his head away from me and position himself on his back. I wanted to memorize every inch of his skin, the feeling of his touch against mine.
We never bothered to put clothes back on earlier in the day after… well, you know… it was still terribly difficult to say it out loud. Made love. It was something I never fathomed I would get to experience. I would have never in a million years thought that I would be blessed to have this man laying in front of me, naked. If you would have asked me a few years back what I envisioned my life being like, this was far from it. Part of me knew I would have eventually been killed. Another part of me knew that if Daniel never killed me, he would at least continue to make my life a living hell. And then there was the tiniest sliver of hope that had been suppressed for as long as I could remember. Hope to escape. Hope to be in the arms of someone who would always protect me and love me unconditionally.
That tiny sliver of hope was all I needed. All of it was sitting right in front of me now surrounded by a massive bed in a gorgeous home filled with people I would always consider my family. I wasn’t just blessed. My life had turned into a miracle and I would be damned if I was going to waste the opportunities I had been given.
Deep in my thoughts my eyes caught the contour of his abs causing my skin to become heated with only the passing of a second forcing me out of my own head. I had no control over my hand. It quickly moved from the sweet caress of his face to lightly treading over each hill and valley of his muscles. My touch was light enough for him to not notice but rough enough to feel my breath quicken the further down my hand traveled.
It was like hormones filled my head with desire and lust in one instant. A devilish smirk crossed my face and I cautiously got to my knees grabbing his manhood in my hands. There was never a point in my life where what I was about to do I did for both him and I. Any sexual act had always been forced upon me until just a few hours ago. It was like Adrian had flipped a switch in my mind opening me up to this other world I didn’t know existed. A world filled with love that poured out at his touch and only grew stronger the more intimate we had become. He enlightened me, enlightened my mind that loving someone and sharing that intimate connection with someone was nothing like what Daniel had done to me. Every move, every touch, kiss, was soft, serene, beautiful, pleasurable. If I ever had any doubt in my mind about Adrian’s feelings towards me, I no longer had them now.
However, I had no knowledge or previous experience on how to perform any sexual acts correctly on my own without any prompting. But every cell in my body urged me to keep going.
At first I made small strokes around his shaft with my hand attempting to not wake him but enough to force the blood to rush through his veins. I crept closer to his body until my thigh brushed against his skin forcing a shiver through my nerves. I felt like I was in autopilot mode. My body, my emotions took over for my brain. Whatever felt good, whatever felt right I did. Even with no experience, everything felt like a second nature to me.
I bent forward bracing myself with my free hand on the bed. My lips pressed lightly onto his collar bone. I wanted to savor every damn inch of his body. My kisses were light at first hoping to slowly wake him out of his groggy state as my lips descended slowly from the crook of his neck progressing further down his chest. Every nook, every crevasse, every muscle my lips paid attention to. No part of his body was going to be neglected by my lips. The further down his body I traveled the harder my lips pressed. The more my tongue drew small circles on his skin before being consumed back into the depths of my mouth. My hand grasped around his cock, lengthening out each stroke the harder he became at my touch.
A few small groans passed his mouth but his eyes never fluttered open. The trail of my kisses finally ended just above groin. I placed a few more small kisses on his skin that had been left untouched until only a few inches stood between my lips and his member.
I was nervous. Wholeheartedly nervous. I had never done this before. Daniel always forced this on me, forced everything on me. During my relationship with him I knew in the back of my mind that life was not intended to be like this. That I deserved more. I deserved love. But Daniel had a way of making me feel worthless and degraded. I never had a choice, with anything. Not the clothes that rested on my back or the food I ate. What he desired, he received. Needless to say, it gave me an uneasy feeling at times having this much freedom to make my own decisions with a man that valued each step I took on this earth.
One final breath released from my lungs before my eyes closed. My hand shifted with his hardened member positioning it towards my mouth. Panic rose in my throat as the nerves became too much to handle.
My mind raced over and over attempting to process what I wanted to do, what I was scared of and what had happened in my past. Finally I forced my mind to go blank as I stared at his bare body lying in front of me. Why the fuck are you freaking out Addi? This man loves you unconditionally. He is not your past. He does not judge you on what you have been through. If you do something wrong, there will be no punishment. Just… fuck it. Just do it.
I repeated it over and over in my head for what felt like a lifetime. My breathing finally slowed along with my heart rate. I looked up at his peaceful face once more before grabbing a hold of him positioning his shaft toward my mouth.
My tongue glided along the bottom of his member working its way to his head. I could feel the blood rushing through him. I repeated this motion twice more before finally placing a small kiss at the top.
More. I needed more.
The grip my hand had on him tightened causing a small moan to come from his mouth. I wanted this. Each moan that left his mouth forced my body to become more flushed. Each kiss, each stroke my tongue made left me craving more of him. Finally I caved in listening to what my body lusted for placing him in my mouth.
I motioned my head up and down, creating small strokes with my mouth on his member. My eyes fluttered open for only a second taking a glance at him. His breaths had become rapid. His hands pulled at the sheets. His eyes were still closed but had begun opening slightly. With each stroke his moans became more intense and came more frequently causing my core to throb for him.
“Fuck…” his voice was groggy as his sleepful state forced small breaks in the tone of his voice. It only turned me on more.
Fuck was right. Why the hell hadn’t we done all of this sooner?
His eyes opened completely as his brain caught up with his surrounds.
“Baby, what are…”
I lifted my tongue off of him for only a second looking up at him playfully, his cock still in my hand. “Shhhhh.” I quickly dove back in to my previous motions.
“What… the... hell… are… you… doing?” It was like his brain couldn’t function as he tried to get his words out. “Jesus, fuck Bella.” His eyes rolled back into his head as every playful flick of my tongue forced him closer to the edge. His hands released the sheets, linking under my elbows trying to pull me off of him. “Baby, stop.”
“You really want me to stop Adrian?” I teased him playfully. I straightened my back, leaving my full body on display for him. Drool practically escaped his mouth as my legs straddled his hips. “Or are you just not used to losing control?” My body bent down attaching my lips to his. Every move, every kiss, every grind of my hips sent feverish chills through my nerves. I never wanted to leave this bedroom.
He stayed silent, his lips attached to mine growing hungrier with each passing minute. I could feel the heat radiate off my center, the wetness dripping down my inner thighs. My hand reached back grabbing ahold of his cock one last time, positioning him in front of my core. My hand bracing myself gracefully above his body. I shifted my lips from his to kiss his neck, inches away from his ear.
“I think it’s time you learn to lose control, starting with putting your cock inside me.” my voice was hushed but accomplished what I wanted all the same.
The palms of his hands landed on my ass with force, pushing me down onto him. I opened my body up to him sitting with my back erect, my breast and stomach in full view. I braced my hands on his chest feeling every twitch of his muscles under my fingers.
With each grind of my hips against his the waves of pleasure rolled in. My mind erased any content while screams began to pass through my mouth begging him to keep thrusting into me. It wasn’t long before my body melted onto his as my core clenched around his length. I couldn’t focus on anything besides my body trembling at his touch, my legs shaking from the pleasure. His own climax wasn’t far behind my own.
I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want him to pull out of me. I wanted to stay connected like this for as long as possible. It was an indescribable feeling, sharing your body with someone who loves and cherishes you. It was a feeling I had yet to get used to, but I had already been craving every second of it.
I placed my hands on his chest, lengthening my spine once more to look down on him. His dark hair was tousled and a mess. His eyes were still filled with sleep but looking at me with wonder and lust. His hands rested on my thighs, rubbing every inch he could.
“What was that about mio amore?”
“Are you complaining?” my sly grin didn’t fade as I looked into the glimmer of his eyes.
“Not in the least bit. Just surprised to be woken up that way.”
I had no words. Part of me was fully exhausted and the other part of me craved to stay in this position for the rest of my life.
“Let’s stay in bed tonight. Eat crappy take out food naked. Watch movies. Catch up on sleep. Anything but you leaving to go do work.” I didn’t want to wake up without him next to me in the morning again. But I knew it was going to be my life as long as I stayed by his side.
He propped himself up on his elbows bringing his lips to mine. “Okay.”