Elizabeth gets up, Brian already off to work. Which in a way she was glad, she couldn’t hold her emotions in. They were still up and down. She saw last night how fast her world could come crashing down. That you can think you have everything, then it can be lost in an instance. For the first time in the last two months, she saw that this could be broken, it seemed every now and then she was reminded of that. Things only going smoothly for a short period of time before someone coming in and blowing it up again.
She had to admit, her old life might have been boring but at least it wasn’t crazy like this. Ethan and she had their moments, but nothing like this. For the most part, it was quiet and dull, she never thought she would wish for that back. To be the plain ordinary everyday housewife. With the highest stress being about dinner or homework. Maybe it was better to be with someone you just cared for and not loved?
It was sure less stressful, but then you didn’t have Ethan and a Victoria in the past. There was just Karen and Joe. They were saints comparing to Victoria and Ethan. You could ignore them and stay far away from them, only seeing them on holidays. This shit was all year round!
Elizabeth gets herself out of bed and goes to see her darling son, who she loves more than anything in this world. She is so happy to have him. She just looks at him and smiles, knowing he was the best part of her and Brian. What she wanted most was to give him a happy family. One she thought she had, then she feels don’t think like that, One you do have.
She has to admit to herself that Victoria rattled her more last night than ever. To see her lips and hands on him like that, just hurt her to the core. Even though deep down, she knew that Brian didn’t want her, she still had this little voice in her mind saying what if he did? What if Victoria would change his mind? What if he would go back for Tylor? Then she thinks if he wanted to do that, he already would have. She had to get this out of her mind before it drove her insane.
She takes her son and dresses him for the day, taking him downstairs to feed him. Spending a lot of time with him in the morning before heading to her office to work. She leaves her phone in their bedroom not wanting the distraction. At this moment, she is trying to finish this book and get one thing out of her way. It just seems, as she sits in her chair, nothing comes to her.
She even rethinks the ending. Would Zach and Racheal split? Everyone else does, what would make them so special? Not everything always ends in a fairytale way. Hell, from what she saw nothing ever did. True love? True marriages? Even the best marriages really weren’t, what they seemed on the outside. There was always something hidden, some lie there. Just neither one of them willing to admit to it. Nothing was what it seemed, it always looked better from the outside. People stayed in marriages they thought were good when it was all a sham. The man or woman cheating the entire time. Or going behind their spouse in some way or another. It just brought back last night, making her sick to her stomach.
She knows she can’t write feeling this way, her own emotions are in the way and taking over. It's not what she wants for the book. She just gets up, and goes to her room, sliding on a cute tank dress with cute little white sneakers. She puts her hair up in a ponytail. Grabbing her phone and purse. Not even looking to see if she missed any calls.
She goes downstairs where her son is swinging in his swing and she picks him up. Putting him in his stroller.
“Mom, I am going to go for a walk with the baby,” Elizabeth says.
“Ok, do you need company? Is everything ok? You seem distant? Did Something happen last night?” Joan asks.
“No, I would like to be alone if that is ok. I just need some space. Everything is fine, I just need time to think, and clear my mind. I just can’t seem to write anything.“Elizabeth answers not telling the whole truth.
“Things will be fine with that damn book, you let it get to you more and more. Whatever you come up with, it will be wonderful. The last two were, your putting way too much pressure on yourself and you're not enjoying the better things in front of you. You have an adorable son and a great husband. You need to enjoy it and not let the little things get in the way.” Joan says.
“I know your right. I also have a contract, I need to make sure I complete. It's my bread and butter. My freedom, my independence.” Elizabeth comments.
“Brian isn’t like Ethan, Elizabeth. He would give you, he already has. This home is beautiful and I couldn't imagine you asking for something and him telling you no.” Joan responds.
“That’s just it. I don't want to have to ask. I know Brian is different, I appreciate everything he does for our family. I just like my independence.” Elizabeth states.
“I understand that. Just it's nice for a man to take care of you once in a while. It doesn’t happen often.” Joan laughs.
“He does, everything isn't on me. We share the house duties. Yes, there are times I still do everything but I don't mind it. I know he appreciates it and is busy. Then when I am busy he helps out. It is nice. We have it nice that way.” Elizabeth answers.
“You two have it nice in a lot of ways. I am so happy for you both.” Joan says with a smile.
Elizabeth just smiles back, hiding her true thoughts at the moment. She didn’t want to bring her mother into this. It wasn’t going to change anything. She gets the stroller and heads out. Just needing the time alone.