His eyes went wide. He backed up and let go of me. I just stood there, I didn't know what to say or even what to do. I couldn't even think straight. My eyes looked around him and I saw Josh standing there with a look of horror on his face. He had some woman in his arms. I felt arms touch my shoulders and I looked to see Abby looking at me. "Oh god." I heard someone say. I looked and it was Josh. "Come on man, let's go." He was saying to Spencer who was still just looking at me. I felt a pain in my heart when my eyes met his again.
"Come on Page, let's get out of here." Abby was saying as she was pulling my arm. Then reality hit me and my pain turned into anger. I moved closer to him and slapped him fully across the face.
"How dare you," I said and it all hit me so hard. Tears fell down my face and I just waited for him to say something. His hand went to his face and he just looked at me. "Say something you cowered," I said, but still he said nothing. Abby started to pull me away from him and I just kept my eyes on him. My tears were so much that my vision was starting to blur. Abby and Chris got me outside of the club and it was raining. Both girls were trying to get us a cab. I just stood there in the rain and felt so broken. He was the last person I ever thought I'd see. Especially tonight. I took a deep breath. Abby came over and took my hand to lead me to our cab. I looked back at the door and Spencer came running outside. His eyes found mine and I just turned my back on him. My tears just fell. I haven't seen Spencer in so long. He was still as beautiful as the last time I remember him. I held onto my heart and all these hidden feelings came rushing back to me.
It crushed me right there and then. I couldn't stop the tears from falling. Abby just held onto me and Chris was on her phone with Aiden I believe. "Abby, I don't want to see anyone," I said through my tears. I didn't know why I couldn't stop crying.
"Shh, Page you need us tonight." She said. I didn't argue. I just looked out the window until we pulled up to my apartment and Aiden and Seth were waiting outside. I got out of the car and my legs gave out on me. Aiden grabbed me in mid-air and carried me up to my apartment. I wrapped my arms around him and held on. He took me in my bedroom and sat me down on the bed.
"Why Aiden? Why do I feel this way?" I asked him as he was removing my shoes. "I should hate him," I said again.
"Oh baby, I don't know." He said. I just kept crying. He went into the bathroom and got a towel for me. He started to dry off my face and I just felt numb. He went back into the bathroom and started a shower. "Come on sweetheart. You need a shower." Aiden said and I got up and went into the bathroom and got into the shower. I just stood there in the water feeling so fucking confused. I just didn't understand why I felt like this. I got done and covered myself with the towel and went back into my bedroom. Aiden was sitting on my bed and came to my side right away. I haven't felt this broken in a long time. After I got into a teeshirt. Aiden brushed out my hair and laid me in my bed. He kissed the top of my head and left the bedroom. I cried myself to sleep.
I woke up the next morning to Aiden sleeping in the chair in my room. I got up quietly and made my way out to the living room. All my friends were sleeping. I smiled at them. They really were the best of friends. I took a deep breath and went into the kitchen to make coffee. "How do you feel?" Aiden asked me as he came into the kitchen. I just looked over at him and went back to making my coffee. "That bad?" He said. I took a deep breath.
"Do you want coffee?" I asked him.
"Yes please." He said. I went to make his coffee and I just grabbed the counter. Aiden's arms came around me. "Come on Page let's go have a seat," He said as he took me over to the table.
"Why do I feel this way?" I asked him again.
"Page, you loved him. He was your whole world. He mattered to you. Why wouldn't you feel this way?' He said.
"But he left me to die," I said. Aiden took a deep breath.
"I must be crazy. He didn't leave you to die Page. He honestly thought he was doing the right thing." He said. I just looked over at him.
"What are you saying Aiden?" I asked him.
"He left you to protect you. He knew the Bailey's weren't going to hurt you. He knew that Page and they didn't hurt you. In fact, you got a family from them and you love them." Aiden said. I tried to process Aidens words. I was even more confused now then before if that was even possible.
"I don't know anything right now," I said.
"You need time Page. Please take your time before you do something you might regret." He said. I took a deep breath and just sipped my coffee. I didn't really do much that day. My friends stayed most of the day with me. When the sun started to set. Everyone but Abby headed home. Aiden gave me a very big hug and I said goodbye. Abby was sitting on my couch. I went in and set next to her.
"Let's talk, Page." She said.
"What do you want to talk about?" I asked her.
"Your life." She said. I just looked at her. "Page, you came home to find yourself and I think you have been doing a good job of doing that, but you can't just ignore the issues you have. They will never be resolved if you just set them off to the side." She said.
"What am I suppose to do Abby?" I asked her.
"I can't tell you that Page. This is your journey, not mine, but whatever you choose to do. We will be here for you." She said.
"I'm just so confused Abby. My heart just won't tell me what to do." I said.
"So, what's your head say?" She asked me.
"To run away," I said.
"Well, I think we can both agree that's not a choice." She said. I just took a deep breath.
"I just don't know what to do or how I feel. I'm just so sad," i said and laid my head down and cried again.