Chapter 31 - Dominic
Chained to a cross with heavy silver cuffs and chains over my body to keep me from shifting, I have nothing else to think of except her death. They chained me because I refused to listen. I lashed out and will attempt to kill anyone who entered my cell. I couldn't control my beast. I didn't want to. I was too busy missing her and me missing her only increased my wolf's agitation.
In a way, it was for the best. Now that I am alone, I am truly feeling the after-effects of it all. In that brief moment that I got to hold her in my arms back at home in our room, I got to feel her wolf.
I had her.
She was awake.
I did everything I could to save her.
She fought me in her already weakened condition. She was already weak when we picked her up from the Superior Court. Both of the sisters were weak and unconscious.
Every time I close my eyes, I can still smell her blood. I can still feel how cold she was. Her parents told me that her skin was as pale as the cement floor she was lying on. Her lips were blue.
From the moment we brought her home her fever never stopped rising. Soon after injuries got infected. Even the antibiotics that we tried pumping rapidly into her body wasn't helping. Still, I did everything I can to keep her alive.
On the seventh day, her fever broke. The doctors took her off the antibiotic and oxygen tube as she was finally breathing on her own again. I had hope.
She was recovering—at least we thought she was until I heard how faint and slow her heartbeat was. Until I watched the life leave her eyes in my arms. Until I watched her stopped breathing.
I knew something was wrong. I felt it in my guts. The doctor said it was a last surge of energy that her wolf had left. Her last attempt in reaching out and dying in the comforts of my arms. She pushed herself to wake up for me even if it is for the briefest moment. It hurt me, even more, to realize she died fighting to feel the bond again.
It was hard to believe she is dead then but now I am grieving.
If anything, I welcomed my punishment. If they gave me death, it will be merciful in comparison to this agonizing pain and grief. It will be better than a lifetime of loneliness. Werewolves can mate again after their mates have died but I have no intention in doing so.
The contract is long gone now. So is my mate.
The sound of multiple heavy footsteps sounded down the hall. It grew closer until it stopped in front of my cell. I knew who it was even before they spoke. They have visited me almost every day but every day I have pushed them away.
"Alpha Dominic, your mates funeral is today," Alpha Superior Lance began.
I opened my eyes and turned towards his voice.
Her funeral is today. She is truly dead. I welcomed again the wave of pain that rushed straight to my heart, clenching it and if I was standing, I would have fallen to my knees.
"And?" I rasped.
I heard him pull out a chair and then shuffling noises. I have only met him a few times only but Lance is the newest member of the Alpha Superiors. He took over after his father handed him his position.
"We investigated your case. I sent two elite mercenaries out to Antarctica to question the guard who guarded your mate that night. When questioned, the guard admitted in receiving orders to perform another third torture session on your mate," Aloha Superior Rebecca announced.
I curled my hands into fists. I'm enraged by this information. Hearing it is different from assuming it. Growling inhumanely, I struggled against the chains.
"You must think we all planned this but I can assure you, we didn't. None of us were aware of what was happening. Emerson ordered it behind our backs," she continued.
"You are all stupid to fall under his plan. None of you noticed or paid any attention to what he was doing. You all grew comfortable warming your asses on the throne, you failed to notice that one of your own is corrupted. That he had full intentions and abusing the laws," I snarled, pulling my teeth back to bare my canines. "You're a pathetic lot who claims to be Superiors to our race!"
Alpha Superior Rebecca growled her displeasure. Her pride is getting the best of her. She charged and clutched my throat in her hands.
"Becca, please," Alpha Superior Lance scolded.
"Kill me. It will end my suffering," I said defiantly.
"You think I can't kill you? You are nothing, Dominic. You are nothing but a small rock under my shoes. Worthless," she grounded.
"I know you can kill me but I am unafraid of death. There is nothing more in this life for me. There is no reason to live."
"You can mate and mark another female. Love doesn't end with one person. You will fall in love again," Alpha Superior Rebecca added, her voice softened a little in sympathy.
"Lilac was mine one and true love. With her gone, there is nothing left for me."
"Which leads us to why we are here today." Alpha Superior Lance clapped his hand once before I heard him stand up.
"With the charges against you, it is more than enough evidence to order your immediate death. However, we all have discussed and come to a conclusion. It is unconventional, really, but we agreed that it is something that needs to be done.
There was a moment of silence.
"Alpha Superiors positions are not earned. They are birthrights. You killed one of us easily even through your blindness. That takes a lot of strength and power. Therefore, we are offering you the fifth Alpha Superior title," Alpha Lance continued.
I scoffed before laughing. Are they fucking serious? They want me to be one of them?
"I killed one of you, what's to say I won't kill the rest of you once I am freed?" I threatened lowly.
"Because you are smarter than that, Alpha Dominic," Alpha Superior Lance countered.
"In this world, we have lived long enough to know that if there is no leadership, there is no ground to stand on. The world can be a very scary place when there is chaos, Dominic," Rebecca said next.
"And if I still say no?"
"Then you will die."
They are tying my hands. Forcing me to become one of them. If I say no, I won't be able to see Lilac for the last time. If I say yes, I am handed a title I do not want. A seat that is stained with the blood of a sadistic asshole.
"The funeral is today at noon. You have three hours to consider this. Alpha Dominic, you must understand that this offer is a one-time offer."
I clenched my teeth in anger. Slowly, I listened to their retreating footsteps. Alone again, I am basked with sorrow and pain. Lilac is gone. She's being buried today. My heart throbbed painfully in my chest. Fisting my hands, I let out another mournful howl of pain.
Several hours later, the sound of footsteps made me open my eyes again. I looked ahead and saw little silver of lights moving. Alpha Nathaniel's scent entered my cell.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
"Honestly, I don't know either," he replied. "You took my mate and left me yours."
"When are you going to get over it? You don't love her," I growled.
"I'm a petty person, Dominic. You'll just have to take it," he said casually before I heard the sound of a chair scraping. I listened to him settled down and exhaling.
"I'm going to ask again. What are you doing here?" I snapped in irritation.
"It's one in the afternoon and you haven't made a decision."
"I'm not discussing this with you."
"You will discuss it with me because you don't have much time, Dominic."
"Get the fuck out," I growled.
"No," he countered arrogantly.
"Whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it."
There was a moment of silence. I knew he hadn't left the cell because I can still smell and hear his breathing.
"I'm sorry that she died. I don't know how you are feeling but I can imagine how painful it is." He spoke up after a while. The arrogance was gone from his voice.
"Those rats sent you down to convince me?"
"Quite the opposite. I hate them as much as I hate you. Nonetheless, I am here to visit you, but I am also here to give you friendly advice."
"Believe whatever you want, Dominic. I know there is no way in hell you would accept that position, but I also know that Lilac's death must mean something. You need to bring good out of this tragedy. I have never met her, but I think she would not want you to grieve like this. She would want you to be strong and make a difference. You have an opportunity here, Dominic. An opportunity that never comes by. You can change our future kind by ruling with the Alpha Superiors. Even you know that you can't do that with the title you have now." He stood up and walked over to stand before me.
I hate to admit it but he's right.
"This is not for them. This is for her," I declared.
"It's for her." Nathan agreed.
Even though I do not want to move forward, even though I am more than happy to wallow in my grief and die alone, I did the one thing she asked me to do.
I didn't give up.
~ ~ ~
I stood over her coffin wishing that any minute now, I would wake up and this would all be a dream. That she didn't die and that she is sleeping in my bed, recovering. That all this pain and heartache was nothing else but a dream.
I reached out and touched her cheek. There is no warmth to her skin. My thumb grazed her lips and couldn't stop the onslaught of tears from escaping. I didn't give a fuck who saw me.
I love you. I will always love you. I want to believe that this is a dream and that any minute now I will wake up and feel you sleeping next to me. My love, I have failed you as a mate. I wasn't strong enough. When I did finally fight for you, it was already too late. I hope you can forgive me and wait for me. We will meet again, I prayed silently while moving my hand to clutch hers in mine.
When they lowered her casket into the ground, I felt my heart and soul died with her. I am no longer the same person. I stood there listening to them throw the dirt into her grave, but I made no move to walk away. How can I leave the person I love? How can I just leave her there alone? I can't and so I stood. I stood there listening and comforted her. She shouldn't be alone.
When I was finally alone, I dropped down to my knees. I'm dying inside. Crawling on my hands and knees, I placed my hands on her dirt-filled grave. My heart is buried with her. The immense pain causes me to howl. Tears seemed to be unstoppable at this point.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, gulping down the lump in my throat.
I'm sorry I couldn't protect you. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I'm sorry for allowing this to go this far.
"I love you, Lilac. I will always love you."
Finally, Peyton had to come and dragged me away from her grave and take me home. Truth be told, going back home is unrealistic. It felt like I wasn't in my own home. It didn't feel the same.
Walking up those stairs, I stopped outside our bedroom door and I couldn't move. I couldn't open it. This was our room. I held her in this room. We bickered and fought in this room. I kissed and made love to her in this room.
I am afraid to enter alone. Closing my eyes, more tears slid down my cheek. I can't do this.
I turned and walked into the guest bedroom.
Bear with me, guys. We can do this. Put your faith in me. I often say to my readers, I love ripping you all apart and then piecing you all together piece by piece with 'I'm sorry' bandaids. Expect emotional trauma and if you need a shoulder to cry on, I will be here. *pats shoulder* but I will not forsake you. I promise.