CHAPTER 9 - LILAC
After fleeing the Blackwood’s Residence and running aimlessly around, I found myself standing in front of a pay phone. Staring at the device as if it had offended me in some way. Rain drenched my clothes and my shoes were dirty with mud. My hair clung onto my skin.
Do I call? Do I not call?
Slowly, I reached for the phone receiver, I picked it up and then slipped a coin I found sitting on the pay phone inside. I dialed the memorized phone number and waited as it rang.
She picked up at the second ring.
“Hello?” Violet’s voice came on the other end.
“Violet?” My voice came out hoarse and broken.
“Lilac? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You sound horrible.” She sounded genuinely concerned.
“I can’t do this, Violet. I-I can’t. You have to replace me. You have to come here. I can’t lie to him. He doesn’t deserve this, Violet.” Tears slipped down my cheeks. I have always been the weaker one compared to Violet.
“It has only been two days, Lilac. Is he really that bad?” Violet asked.
“He’s not bad,” I answered almost immediately.
“Then why are you so persistent in me coming?” She wondered.
“Because I can’t lie. I am not that kind of person. If you care about me at all, you would come and stop this before it gets worse.” I replied.
“Lily...I can’t. I can’t go there. I just can’t. I’m not ready.”
“You are.” I protested. “You will do fine. You are always the strong one!”
“I can’t!” Violet shouted back and it took me off guard.
“Why?” I asked.
“I-I’m not as strong as you think. I am not ready to carry the weight of Luna. I don’t want to be mated to an Alpha who manages over twenty thousand people. Will he ever have time for me? I am not like you, Lilac. I never studied. I never read a book in my life. Dad has always asked me to learn about the roles of the pack. We have been in the same classes. We were taught to lead and manage pack issues, but I have never paid attention to any of that. I am not ready, Lilac.”
“You don’t need all of that to be his Luna.”
“It is easy for you to say. You have always been perfect at everything,” she accused.
“No.” She said in a stern voice. “Listen to me, Lilac. I am sorry I have placed you in this situation. I will explain everything to our parents. I promise you I will but as for Dominic and me-it will never happen.”
“You can’t be serious,” I responded, “You are making me take your place. Do you realize what he calls me?”
“I’m sorry, Lilac. I don’t care what you do.”
“You are being selfish!” I screamed into the phone. Furious now at my own twin sister for abandoning me and leaving me to deal with her lies.
“I’m sorry.” I can hear her crying. “I am sorry, Lilac. Please forgive me.”
“No,” I growled. My own fury rising with each passing second, I remained on the phone with her. “What do you want me to say to him? How am I supposed to get out of this situation?”
“I-I d-don’t know,” she answered.
“Right at this moment, I hate you.”
" I’m pissed and I don’t think I can forgive you. I can’t talk to you right now because I might say something I will regret.” I hung up the phone, slamming it hard before turning on my feet and walking down the sidewalk. I heard Violet calling my name before the call ended.
She’s selfish. Throwing me into the water and letting me drown. This was her issue. This was her job.
I can feel my anger rising to scary heights. My canines lengthening at my extreme emotions. It poked the inside of my lips. The fingernails turning into claws and digging into my palms.
I turned into a dark alleyway and began pacing. Breathing techniques and trying to clear my mind before I destroy something. I was so consumed in my own thoughts that I didn’t hear someone enter the alleyway that I was in. The sound of an empty glass bottle being kicked caught my attention.
I whipped my head in its direction and saw a dark shadow. The person took another step and appeared underneath the street light.
He had changed his clothes to jeans and a loose black V-neck t-shirt. His hands stuffed into his jean pockets. His eyes were on me.
“Stop.” It came at a harsh snarl-animalistic. My wolf was taking over. All that pacing and breathing shit didn’t work.
He took another step towards me and my canines that were now out, poked into the skin of my lips. The smell of my own blood invading the air between us and mixing with the after rain. Dominic put his hands up to show me he wasn’t going to hurt me. I glared at him.
Another growl rumbled from me.
Dominic might not be able to see but he can sense a threat even when he is blind.
“Ok...” He whispered. “You need to think about what you are doing.”
I laughed but it didn’t sound like me. My face tilted to the night sky and my eyes were closed.
“I don’t know what I am doing,” I told him the truth.
“Then tell me.” He nodded his head which earned another laugh from me.
It tasted vile but it was charismatic.
Once it enters, it is hard to get rid of it.
My balled fist made an impact against the metal trash bin in the alley. The thing flew and hit the brick wall which cracked underneath the impact. Dominic zipped up to me. He had me pinned up against the walls in seconds. His eyes have changed color. His wolf was peeking out at me.
“Stop,” He ordered.
I clawed at his hands. My hands moving to his shirt where I clawed his shirt off. Claw marks filled his chest and arms. His own blood mixing with mine. I snarled and growled at him, refusing to stop.
“Stop,” He spoke firmer this time. One hand came to grip my cheeks to focus my eyes on his face.
“Let me go,” I demanded.
“Do not let your emotions take over, little mate. Think about something else.” He urged.
I growled while shaking my head. Refusing. It was better to let the rage take over than my own guilt. My own worries. I shook him off me. I’m surprised at how hard I did it. He flew and hit the wall opposite of me. Again, the brick wall cracked underneath the pressure. I blinked and he was back in front of me. Pinning me again. My hands above my head and his body locked on mine.
Another feeling started drumming through my veins.
I snarled again.
“Are you really blind?” I snarled.
“Blind as ever can be.”
“Then how?” I whispered. My anger quickly dissipating and replaced with another sensual sensation. One that has my body heating quickly and my heart beating against my chest.
“When you are blind, you are forced to use your remaining senses to survive,” he answered, “Your scent is hard to miss.”
He released me as soon as he felt the threat was going away. I stood before him with a bruised lip from biting it too hard. Silence filled the air between us and I think he was waiting for me to speak up. Tell him what happened to cause me to go into a blind rage.
“Let’s go into the car. You are wet.” He told me.
I nodded and together, we walked to the car. It was nice of him to find me. I know it is hard for him to see at night. I thought he had gone to bed. I guess he heard that I have left the residence and came out looking for me.
When we were inside the car, he ordered Cody to turn up the heat a little. He settled into the seat next to me. I sat with my hands folded in my lap. My mind running through a million things at once.
Violet’s words echoing through all of it.
She made it clear.
She didn’t want him.
She didn’t want anything to do with this.
Lemons into lemonade.
I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat and looked at him. He had his eyes straight ahead. He wasn’t wet like me. My eyes trailed over his features. This man was beautiful in his own ways and it seems that each passing second standing in his presence makes it harder to not like him.
“Thank you,” I whispered, breaking the silence.
He nodded without saying anything. I played with my fingers before looking out the window. This whole thing was a mess.
“I’ll leave first thing tomorrow,” I told him and I felt him stiffen next to me but still he doesn’t say a single word.
“I’m sorry for everything. You deserve so much better than me, Dominic.” I continued.
“Stop,” he growled.
I was silent for a minute but I wasn’t done with everything I needed to say. I felt like I needed to say something. Explain why I am going.
“I am not the woman you think I am. I can’t stay here with you.”
“Don’t give me excuses, Violet.” He sneered this time. His eyes snapped to me and I can see the fury and resentment behind them.
“I know you are angry.”
He closed his eyes and inhaled slowly before exhaling.
I decided to stop talking. I turned in my seat and looked out the window. I guess there isn’t much I could say to pacify the situation. Telling him the truth and it could result in a breach in contract. He will possibly hate me and my family. It was better off if he didn’t know and that Violet didn’t want him as that is the truth.
We made it back to the residence. There I had gathered some spare clothes from the closet and headed to the guest bedroom. I took a shower and headed to the guest bed where I slipped in and pulled the covers over me.
Sleep didn’t come easy but when it did, I dreamt about him.
When I woke up the next morning and walked to the bathroom, my eyes were red from lack of sleep. I washed my face the best I could and brushed my teeth before stepping outside of the bedroom.
I took a few more steps and appeared in front of Dominic’s room. Placing my ear against the door, I listened for body movement. There was nothing. I pulled back and reached for the doorknob.
When I opened the door, he was nowhere in sight.
I guess he went to work early. I walked to the closet and began packing my stuff. In the midst of packing, I slipped in one of his t-shirts into my luggage. After I was done packing, I picked out a plain t-shirt of mine and some black lounge pants to wear.
I made my way downstairs. No one stopped me but everyone gave me a sad disappointed look. I hesitated when I reached for the doorknob to the front door.
I hesitated because I questioned if I am doing the right thing but I quickly smothered that thought and opened the door. Stepping out, I can see Peyton waiting for me. He was standing next to the car.
I walked down the steps and approached him.
“Are you ready?” He asked.
I nodded before entering the car. I’m surprised Peyton is waiting for me. He must have realized I would be waking up around this time.
When we were inside, the car headed out of the driveway and out of the gates. We pulled onto incoming traffic.
Silence fell around Peyton and me. I turned in my seat to look at him.
“Are you going to ask why I am leaving?” I questioned.
He turned and gave me a sad smile. “It is hard for you to commit. Our Alpha is blind and is weak. Two things that are something nobody looks for in a mate.”
“That’s not it,” I told him flat out.
“Then what is it?” He asked.
I couldn’t answer his question.
“I can’t stay here,” I told him.
“And why?” He asked. “Are we that bad?”
It was my turn to smile. Shaking my head, I looked him in the eye.
“You guys are amazing. For two days, I loved everything about Blackwood and this city.” I told him.
“Then what is it?”
I took a chance.
“If I tell you a secret, can you carry it with you without telling a soul?”
“For you, yes.” He nodded and I can see it in his eyes that he meant it.
“My name is not Violet. Violet is my sister. My name is Lilac. I switched places with my sister. It was her idea. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to lie to people. It isn’t as easy as when we were children.” I spilled it out quickly before I lose my confidence.
“I figured so,” Peyton said.
“What?” I asked in confusion.
“I have been told that John’s twin daughters is different in characteristic. Lilac is more calm and reasonable while Violet is hellfire and irrational.” He turned to look at me. “You are anything but that.”
I smirked and a soft laugh escaped me.
“But why can’t you tell our Alpha the truth?” He asked.
“Because I do not want to hurt him,” I told him. “I also don’t want bad blood between the two packs.”
“You care for him.” He stated but I answered it with a nod.
“He is a good man,” I added.
“Then stay.” He answered.
“I can’t. He will know. He knows my scent and he would keep calling me Violet. I’m not Violet.”
“Then stay as somebody else.”
“I can’t be Lilac either.”
“Then come up with something other than Violet and Lilac.”
“But I will still be lying to him.”
“You aren’t necessarily lying to him if you are giving him who you truly are. He just won’t know your identity.”
“You are doing everything you can to make me stay, aren’t you?” I asked.
He chuckled while I thought about his answer. He was right. I can’t be Violet because Dominic whispering Violet’s name was enough to make my skin crawl. He doesn’t necessarily know that I am Lilac but I can’t pretend to be somebody else. I am me.
I am Lilac.
“Twins carry similar scents. Sometimes it is even hard to tell the difference between the two.” I whispered this fact not to him but to myself.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I am coming back but as me.”