Flour to Blood
Rain and fog covered me from wondering eyes as I held my breath; trying to keep myself from being seen as I looked around the house holding the cat in my arms.
Gang activity from the M8s was common but never near me. But there is Dad, why are M8s talking with my Dad he’s a cop?
My body didn’t move, was I supposed to move? Would they care? Would they tell me to keep quiet? I wanted to go to Dad but something told me not to move but we were supposed to be going on a trip. He texted saying we needed to leave?
The discussion looked to be coming to an end making me relax as they would be gone. The main guy looked back to his guys before turning back to my Dad. I watched as he grabbed a gun and shot him in the head, a scream coming out from my mouth making eyes fall onto me.
The cat jumped from my arms as I spun around running as hard as my legs could take me but I found myself tripping over them in desperation. My body tumbling down a hill into something wet and hard. Looking down I could see bodies littering the bottom of the hill and blood covering every inch of me as gunshots rang.
My body jolted up, my breathing hitched as I tumbled out of my bed falling on the hard floor, my legs scrambling up towards the bathroom as I emptied what little in my stomach into the toilet.
With my stomach emptied I collapsed onto the cold tiles of my bathroom, memories swirling in my head, my body shaking. I felt so cold, so dead inside. I never thought about it or else it would consume my soul and I would break. Closing my eyes I focused on my breathing to calm down. I have no idea when this would end; the torments of memories and fear that I will be found.
I just want to be safe again, to be free to sleep one night, to be okay in the day time, instead of keeping to the shadows.
Getting up from the floor I walked over to my drawer taking out the burner phone checking for any voicemail messages.
“Yes, I am calling to confirm housekeeping sometime tomorrow or the day after for a full clean. I hope this late notice will be fine. The dogs will be out of the house at day-care so you won’t have to worry. Good night.”
Esposito’s message came to a conclusion leaving me to stare at the phone thinking about what he wants to talk about. He always made a call to give me time to be around for a catch up once a month. The message in code in case his phone is tapped to make it seem as if he called for a maid, not me.
Sighing I knew what I would tell him; that I followed orders working at night, not seeing anyone with nothing out of the ordinary. However, in the times I have talked to him since being here and the times of seeing him in person I have not mentioned Ryker. As far as Esposito knows the only people I talk to are the ones I work with. Ryker is a secret. I can’t very well tell the detective that I am talking with an MC Sergeant of Arms multiple times a week.
My legs rubbed together as I felt the heat spread whenever I saw him or thought of him.
I may have very limited social skills but I saw how hooded and dark his eyes when were close. He was attracted to me, maybe because of what’s between my legs but if I am going to leave here soon then fine, I would be happy bringing him back here for one night if that is what I can get.
I wasn’t a virgin, I lost it a couple locations ago and have had sex a couple times. But… it wasn’t anything special I mostly did it because I was bored of missing out life. If that makes me a slut then shut up and don’t think about my sex life.
As much as I tried not too, my legs pushed together to stop the spreading heat and thoughts of Ryker, the way he walks into the diner. The power that strolls off of him, that calmness telling me that he knows every part of my body. He would command me, having me beg and feeling things I have never felt. I could imagine him without his cut, showing me his tattoos, my hands moving to finally feel his hair that I have been thinking about since I saw him. Those same hands moving down the rest of his body as his arms move-
The burner phone began to continuously beep asking if I wanted to delete the message bringing me back. Shaking my head to rid the thoughts of Ryker I quickly delete the message and thought back on Esposito and the anxiety of my life. My life wasn’t a romance with a hot biker where everything will be fine in the end, its running for the rest of my life… Right?
You are too good for this world. A voice echoed around my head, bringing back the person who I was just thinking about but giving me a calming reaction instead.
But I’m not, I’m one who watched cruelty be put in it and did nothing but run, always running.
Looking over at the clock I see that I need to be at work soon. Though today won’t be anything special since he won’t be coming in… Hopefully that means no one will come in and I can bake in peace. I hate it when customers come in, the chance someone could know me was the only reason why I bake all during the day protected in the kitchen then can take over the whole diner during the graveyard.
It’s been five years and I still live like the scared 16-year-old who watched her Dad’s execution.
Taking a couple deep breaths making sure I won’t go into a panic I slowly grab my burner phone and knife placing them in my jeans. I was told a gun would be better but they terrify me and I will never go near one nor trust anyone who has one. For all I know they will shoot me like I have seen and I could picture my head exploding.
My hand went to my mouth at the thought, bile coming back up that I push down. Knowing that I wouldn’t keep any food down I head out my apartment, walking out of the apartment complex and across the street where the dinner is.
“Good afternoon Drya.” My boss Samuel says as I walk into the kitchen.
Smiling I nod my head lightly as I wasn’t much of a talker. After putting my bag down I open the recipe book and got to work clearing my head of all that haunts me waiting for the next day someone comes in to try my baked goods.
“Drya, someone is up front for you.” Stacy one of the workers said to me through the window after only two hours at work.
My body went rigid knowing no-one should be coming to see me. As Stacy kept staring at me I slowly nodded finally moving to walk out the kitchen to the front, my hand going to my knife. However, the second I started to look around for a M8 I felt my body relax as it always does with him.
“It’s a little early for you to be here, isn’t it?” I asked seeing Ryker leaning against the counter looking exhausted as he chuckled softly to me, probably because my hair is up in one hell of a messy bun and I can guess I have flour on my cheeks.
“All-nighter at work and Tatt is cooking at the club so I got out of there fast.” He said making me shiver at just the sound of his voice as I leaned against the counter trying everything not think about my fantasy.
“Ahhhh, and since you think I am such a good person I may have food for you?” I joked to him feeling his calmness that has become a drug.
He looked at me softly and shrugged. Smiling I turned away from him walking in the kitchen before coming back to him at the register. “Fresh outta the oven, banana bread and egg, bacon, veggie breakfast galette.”
“You know me so well. Fancy with the galette today, you haven’t made those in a while.”
Shrugging I felt myself blush, it was true, I was beginning to know what he liked and didn’t like to eat and I ended finding myself adapting recipes to what I think he would enjoy, he was the only one to eat them so it does make sense. “I felt inspired.”
I rang him up as he passed me a twenty, “Baking anything new tonight?”
“Mhm, test 23 of a chocolate soufflé, not sure how to make it better.”
“Keep the change, and you like baking with lavender,” I felt my face scrunched up about the mix, “okay no… mint?”
A smile tugged at my lips as I looked into those eyes of his, “I could do a mint undertone, how often are you watching those baking shows?”
Ryker rolled his eyes at me shaking his head as he muttered under his breath, “You know when you become a famous baker I should get a pastry named after me. Night Drya, as always too good for this world.”
Looking at him I noticed how attractive he was again, that under his cut was a toned body. He would have to be with his position in the club, right? Keeping himself in shape for anything that his club needs. My thoughts from this morning slowly crept back into my mind...
“How do you eat all these goods and still have the body that you do?” I wonder out loud quickly slapping my hand over my mouth. Ryker raised an eyebrow cocking his head as a soft amused face came over him, “I mean, I just mean that you look fit and you are always eating here, not that I am checking you out or anything, not that you shouldn’t be checked out you are very attractive, more so than the all the guys around here not that I am sexually objectifying you or anything, I mean oh fuck me… no not fuck me! I meant that oh that’s not what I am saying it’s just you eat so many treats, not saying that you should be fat or anything that has to do with fucking but uh oh look there goes a timer bye!” I spun fast sprinting back into the kitchen hiding against the door seeing Samuel laughing at me.
My face burning in embarrassment as I had just told Ryker he is basically the hottest guy around here, to fuck me even though I was talking to myself to shut up and that he should be fat because he eats so much here... Why did I have to say all that? What the fuck is wrong with me.
“Drya sweetie, you need to get out of the kitchen more.” Samuel said laughing so hard tears were coming out of his eyes.
I just groaned getting off the wall getting back to work, needing to do everything and anything to get that whole interaction out of my mine.
Great, that is going to be the worst way to start the next conversation when Ryker comes in and he will... At least since he has come back twice today there is no way he would come back a third.