Eight | Syn
I couldn't believe the nerve of the werewolf who had pulled me down so easily to steal another kiss. He was caressing my lips so easily like it was something we had done a thousand times, like I hadn't been left wondering for years what it would be like. The fact he was being so causal about it pissed me off even more.
Cupping the back of his neck I took control. He didn't deserve something so gentle, so sweet. I bit at his lips forcing them to open for me. I swept my tongue inside, wrestling his tongue that didn't stand a chance against my attacks. I reveled in tasting every inch of his mouth. I could tell Terrin was beginning to get nervous as I dominated him. He stopped responding, alerting me he was thinking about it too much instead of just letting himself feel. Still he did not pull away, it was almost like he was forcing himself to just stand there and take whatever I gave him. Seeing how far I could take it, I pulled his tongue into my own mouth and sucked on it, letting my sharp canines graze it.
And just like that Terrin shoved me away and I let him, running the back of my hand across my mouth slowly while keeping my eyes locked with the astonished werewolf. Terrin's tongue darted out to lick his lips, frowning as he tasted the metallic coppery taste of blood.
"Did you get it all out of your system now?" He demanded.
I scoffed and planted my hand on his chest and pushed him back into the wall, pinning him there. "If you think five years of frustration, anger, desire and rejection are so easily fixed by one kiss then you have another thing coming."
Terrin grabbed my wrist and pried my hand off, stepping away from the wall. "That was a freebie Syn, don't expect me to kiss you again so easily."
"I would never expect you to make things easy Terrin," I drawled, "which is why I have a feeling you aren't going to stop seeing Heidi." My eyes narrowed as his expression morphed into one of surprise. I was annoyed he again believed I couldn't see right through him. Crossing my arms, I prodded him, "So go on, lay it on me. How in Lune's name do you plan on giving me a chance if Heidi is still in the picture?" To say I was irritated was an understatement. Leave it to Terrin to find out a way to give me what I wanted without actually giving me what I wanted.
"You're right, I don't plan on leaving Heidi during this trial period," my eyes narrowed further, "so I'm going to date both of you at the same time."
"Lycans don't date," I responded flatly.
"Well you are," Terrin snapped. "It's this or nothing Syn. If this doesn't work out, I'm not losing my chance with Heidi too."
I hated the way he talked. Hated that he was basically doing this out of pity for me. As closure for himself so he never had to wonder if everything I told him was true. Wonder if lycan mates were really everything I said they were. I hated I had already lost the race when the starting pistol hadn't even fired yet. "The fact that you've decided Heidi has already won tells me there is no way that this can ever be fair. How can I expect to have an equal chance with you when in your mind Heidi will always be the winner?" I wanted to know if he would even deny it, lie that he hadn't already chosen in his mind.
"If I know anything about you Syn, it's that you don't give up when things get hard." His eyes sparkled mischievously as he added flippantly, "If lycan mates are truly all that you claim, it should be easy for you to steal my affection and attention away from Heidi."
My hands clenched into tight fists. I really wished Terrin would use his cleverness for something other than throwing my words back in my face and his smart mouth replies. "And what if the female doesn't agree to this? What makes you so sure she is willing to share?"
Terrin shrugged, "I just do. Besides, if she doesn't, then I will still date you. I'm not going to retract my offer just because she says no, if that is what you are worried about."
I quirked a brow, "Why?" I was a little surprised that he wouldn't use this as an easy out to get out of this.
Sighing the werewolf slouched against the wall, "because you made me realize that you deserve this and because..." he sucked on his lower lip, a red flush creeping up his neck, "and because I don't want to let you go unless I'm absolutely sure there could never be anything like that between us."
Again, I was irked by his wording that easily exposed his intentions. "So you are going into this with the mentality that we aren't going to work." I huffed out a frustrated breath, "This isn't a fighting chance, this is to give you peace of mind."
The werewolf pushed off the wall and shoved his hands in his pockets, "That's not what I meant. I just meant that you have proven to me that, at the very least, you are genuine and won't walk out. I don't want to just throw away that loyalty and dedication without being sure I don't want it."
"So you want me to keep chasing after you while you 'explore your options'?" I made air quotes with my fingers and used my tone to express my severe dislike of his implications.
Terrin's own brows furrowed like he was actually confused, "You haven't had a problem with that until now."
I had to bite my tongue to keep in a growl. I didn't deny it because it was true, but the fact he believed I had so little self respect pissed me off. Did he honestly think I was fine with chasing him all these years? Did he think the humiliation didn't eat at me with every rejection? Terrin really didn't know me at all. "You expect me to be okay with you leading me on, exploiting my feelings, just so you can be sure you don't want me?"
My mate at least had the decency to look embarrassed. "Err... would it help if you thought about it like I am doing this so I can be sure I do want you?"
"No," I responded flatly, "because that would be implying you even believed you might."
Terrin tossed his hands into the air in exasperation. "Come on Syn, I'm giving you a chance, isn't that what you wanted? Isn't that enough?"
"No," I snarled, " because you aren't giving me a chance, you are humoring me." I clenched my jaw in disappointment and frustration. Shaking, my head I turned away muttering, "I should have known you would be too selfish to be fair."
As I turned my back on him, Terrin snatched my bicep before I could take a step, "Wait—just wait." I kept my back to him, giving him a moment to collect his thoughts and think about what he wanted to say. After a few seconds of silence, Terrin took in a deep breath, "Alright, tell me how I can make this fair."
Turning just enough to meet his eyes I stated my own demands. "I want all the same rights you've given that female. I want you to take me on 'dates' and vice versa. I want to be able to touch you–nothing extreme–just holding your hand without you glaring at me. I want to be able to cuddle and kiss you without you trying to punch me in the face."
"Syn..." Terrin groaned looking pained. He tried to give me a sad pleading look to retract my demands but I stared down at him coldly, refusing to budge. Finally the werewolf caved, "Fine." I had to hold in a look of victory, "but you can't sabotage Heidi."
"Agreed," I stated with a single nod, "and that applies both ways." Terrin nodded in affirmation. Then to finalize this, and give him my final condition, I bored into his eyes with all the seriousness I had, "Now tell me," I said slowly "the honest to gods truth," I pinpointed every word, "look me in the eyes and swear before Lune that you will promise to try. That you will give me a fighting chance."
Terrin's lips pressed into a flat line but he didn't look at all surprised I was making him swear such an oath. "I swear before Lune, and all the gods, that I will open my mind and heart to the possibility of there being an us."
He raised his brows in a silent question asking if I was satisfied. "Don't break your word," I warned him even though the both of us knew that his promise was anything but true.