The Inconsolable

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Summary

Unfold into this traumatic, mysterious short story all about love, loss, ​and heartbreak. Alyx is a college student at Kansas State University. She was enrolled in a fiction​ writing class and began to explore different genres, She came across the idea to use a personal story and recreate into something more meaningful. As Alyx was not allowed to turn in this short story due to the wrong type of genre and scene, she would love to put this short story out into the world and continue writing.

Genre:
Romance / Mystery
Author:
Alyx Bishop
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
1
Rating:
4.5 4 reviews
Age Rating:
16+

Chapter 1

It was spring, I look outside my rustic window, the glass is smeared, raindrops bruising the pane. The thunder’s roar shaking the ground like an earthquake. We had plans for a picnic down by the park on Lincoln Street. I call you, smiling at your dorky voicemail I just can’t get enough of. The rain settles down and I start making your favorites. Wheat bread with American cheese and turkey, with just a small dab of mayonnaise, Lord knows you’d have a fit if you could taste it. The phone rings but it’s not you. My hands become numb, the glass pitcher of lemonade falls to the floor, shattered glass in every direction. My body falls, dazed.

I never thought it would end like this. Lost, broken, full of unforgiven fumes that run through my body. What do I do now? The one person, the only person I have ever loved is gone. The police call to ask me questions, ones that I do not have the answer to. I just can’t stop thinking of the park, just five minutes away. Five minutes. We could have been there, laughing, smiling. You are giving me your love affectionately. Holding our hands together, the perfect fit. My mind moves on, glass in my hands, punctured into my knees, my legs. I should have given you every single part of me, I should have picked you up five minutes earlier, we would have been at Lincoln Park. Why couldn’t the world have taken me, not you? You had your whole life ahead of you. Kids, your new job you were so ecstatic about. My bloody hands furrowed into my hair, knees up to my chest, screaming to God on what I do next.

People come and go, bringing me meals we would both hate. The fridge full of lasagna, pies, and flowers scattered among every inch of the counter I have. I pick the petals off one by one, asking “can I do this?“, “will I be okay?“. I look through our pictures, your smiling in every single one. You never took a bad picture, I swear the most photogenic person I had ever met, and now you were gone. There will never be another smiling picture of you, of me. I turn the frames over, not bearing to think of what we could have had.

Days have gone by and I still haven’t heard from your parents, your sister. I’ve called, many times, I’ve driven by their home, no one is ever there. You would have told me to calm down, that they’re probably just busy. I always cherished the connection I had with your family, they felt as though they were my real parents, always supportive and giving in anything I would need. Now I feel as if they’re gone too, another part of my life gone. I lay in my bed tonight, talking to God, asking if I can join you. In the world of unlimited happiness, a world where we could be together forever, with no worries or problems. “God, I may not know the answer to this now, but will I be okay? Will I survive this? Am I strong enough?”. Frightened, I know the answers to all those questions and then I stop. I feel as though I am useless and not even God himself can help me. I’ve pushed aside everything, everything including the planning of your funeral. I know, I know this is unlike me, you’re always reminding me to stop and breathe, stop and breathe in the fresh air and enjoy the sun. Right now, there is no sun and I fear I won’t ever see it again. No fresh air, no birds chirping and singing. All I can hear is your voice, your laugh. I am completely unavailing. Little by little I am falling apart, hoping that one day all my little pieces will come together.

It’s Saturday, our favorite day. I wake up and make your preferred breakfast. Cherry pancakes in the shape of smiley faces. I try my hardest to pour the batter in the shape of a smile, but I can’t. You would be so disappointed in me. I whisper, “I’m sorry”, hoping that you can hear me, hoping someone can hear me. I thought that I had everything ready for our favorite breakfast, but the only thing missing was you. I can barely eat, picking out the cherries and just eating the pieces drenched in syrup like you always did. I always wondered why you loved cherry pancakes so much, even though you never ate the cherries. You were so funny.

I push myself out of the house today, we always went to the store on Saturdays. Your funeral is two days away, and I am dreading every second of it. I walk past Miller Street, then Arrow. Lincoln Street is next, the park is full of children playing and laughing. Husbands holding their wives’ hands, looking at them, thanking them for the beautiful life they have. We could have had that, we could have been happy, but why weren’t you? Why were you so unhappy that you had to leave this world, that you had to leave me, us? That question comes into my mind every second of every day. I then pass the cemetery where you’ll soon be, only five minutes away.

It’s now Monday, the day when I finally say my last goodbyes to you. I slide on my pale black dress, the one you loved. You always made me feel beautiful in this dress, you always did. My knees are still bruised and cut from the glass pitcher and my hands are the same. I feel as though you are telling me to calm down again, but I can’t calm down, damnt! I just can’t. Before I leave, I get on my knees and talk to God one more time, hoping your kneeling right there by me. “God today is the day I am not ready for. Help me, help get through this day.” I take a deep breath, the deepest breath I have ever taken. The feeling in my chest is unbearable. I feel as though someone has just stabbed me a million times.

I am surrounded by many of your friends and family, almost everyone except your parents and sister. I can’t feel anything; my mind is racing with unconscious thoughts that won’t go away. And then, I see them. Your mother, wearing a beautiful black dress, your favorite scarf of hers wrapped around her neck and a Kleenex box in her hand. Your father, holding your mothers’ other hand, kissing her forehead. Your sister, resembling you in every way, her arm around your mothers’ shoulder, whispering in her ear. In her other hand is a piece of lined paper, unfolded and wrinkled. She gives me a soft smile and hugs me, she hugs me tight. She holds one of my hands and places the paper in the other, she whispers “you need to read this, not now, but later.” My heart drops.

The funeral ends with your father reading his eulogy, he loved you so much. I watch as your casket enters the ground, slow and despairing. I have so much I want to say to you, so much I could have said. But now as I hold this wrinkled paper in my hands, all I can do is say goodbye to you.

Days, weeks, months have gone by and I still haven’t touched the paper. Not only am I terrified of what it could be, but what it could say. I walk five minutes down the road to Lincoln Street, where you’re buried. I sit down, and I talk with you. I tell you about how stressful work has been, and I breathe. I pretend you’re sitting in front of me holding our perfect fit hands together, counting through our breaths. I reach into my pocket and pull out the wrinkled sheet of paper from your sister. It reads, “To my lovely Katherine, I don’t know how to say this, but I guess now I have nothing to lose. If you’re reading this, I have left this world. You may have not known this, but I am very broken inside, to a point where I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep. These days I see no light in the world. There was a time where I saw my life with you and our future. You were wonderful to me, I didn’t deserve you, I didn’t deserve your love. I don’t want you to think you can’t survive without me, because you can. You are the strongest woman I have ever met, and I know you can get through this. I bet you have been breathing as we do together. I am proud of you, always know that. I know you don’t understand now, but you will. You will understand your worth in this world, but right now, it wasn’t with me. My love, you will get through this. I love you, always.

Goodbye for now,

Charlie.”

The deep feeling in my chest is back, I can’t stop the tears from falling my eyes. I scream I scream like there’s no other living person on this world who can hear me. I know that this world will not stop for anyone, not for me, not for Charlie. I rock back and forth, crying into my knees. That paper, that simple wrinkled paper consisted of everything my heart knew it would be. I stop, and I breathe, out two, three four, in, one, two three… I stand up and walk. And here I am again, walking down Lincoln Street passing the park I’m only five minutes from. Now only five minutes away from you, and all I can say is “Goodbye Charlie”.

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Kaitlyn: So good! Thank you for this alien adventure in space with this sexy couple. I will be trying your other works as well!

Dorothy Marcinkowski: Amenzing story can't stop reading

JuliMin: La historia me encanta, lo tiene todo, los personajes son los mejores, el trama te absorve y es dificil parar de leer.

ogunbayoaderemi: The lead actor and the supporting actress are both interpreting their roles well. The director and every crew and cast member are on point with the exception of the photographer.

World of: This was a amazing story, I loved the character development.💕💕

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Julian: Juss amazing♥♥♥♥💚💕💕💕💕♥♥♥♥♥💚

Raven: I love troy to the moon and back on how he loves and treasure Lucy, thank you so much Laura for this wonderful novel..good luck and more inspirations for you..god bless

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Angela L Serrano: Such a great story. I started and finished the entire thing in one sitting. Great job.

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