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Couple-Items for Our Eyes Only

Leo released a high-pitched sound close enough to match a female walrus in heat. Of course, I just made that up, because the description sounds fitting.

I don't know how a female walrus in heat sounds.

And I don't want to.

Anyway, Leo was laughing his ass off as I told him how my date with Brandon ended up last night. I guess it was indeed funny in a sense, but he was laughing just a bit too much.

And he wasn't even there.

Nichole rolled her eyes at her exaggerating boyfriend as she gave me an amused smile.

"I mean, c'mon!" Leo choked out, his chuckles getting the best of him. "What a loser! Screaming at some horror movie."

I gave him a look and was about to ridicule him but Nichole beat me to it. "At least he only screams. You on the other hand almost pissed in your pants when we were watching Insidious 2 the other night."

Leo's laughter stopped abruptly. I could see the small glare he was giving our best friend, but I was determined to make it worse.

"Aha," I smirked. "Just as I thought. You're just a chick with a dick. Just like Brandon."

"And you're a dick in a chick." He quickly replied. He probably thought he sounded smart until we stopped and stared at him. Leo thought about what he just said for a moment and then rephrased his sentence hurriedly. "I mean, you're a dick disguised as a chick."

Pft. What an idiot.

"That's gross you two," Nichole wrinkled her nose, but she was concealing her laughter.

The bell cut our pleasant conversation short and we were forced to say good bye and go straight to class. Unfortunately for me, I had no classes with neither Leo nor Nichole. And fortunately for them, they had the same classes together.

Stupid lucky couple. They always come and go as a package deal or some sort.

After we parted ways, I advanced to my next class. And as excited as I was to pay attention to our new history lesson about a dead guy who used to wear a curly white wig and a pair of tights (not to mention the tacky pumpkin shorts), I just couldn't help but wonder: where was my stupid potato? And what was he doing right now?

I was just curious. No special reason.

I entered my classroom and as soon as my butt touched the seat, our teacher began the lesson. Oh goody.

"Let's go on another date, gossip potato," Brandon said a little bitterly as we made our way to his car. Nichole wanted to buy a new pair of shoes so I was compelled to go with her. And of course, Leo got dragged along, and as usual, Brandon was our ride to the mall.

Leo was still snickering behind us, making fun of Brandon. "He just wants you to forget about your first date."

He shot Leo a glare before I cooed at him and pinched his cheek like he was a ten year old. "Don't mind him, loser potato."

He irritatedly took my hand off his cheek and stomped to the driver's seat. I couldn't stop my giggles. He was mad because I told Leo and Nichole about our date and how he screamed like a girl.

It really wasn't that big of a deal. Wonder why those two took it so seriously.

When we got to the mall, Nichole pulled me towards the women's shoes department immediately. Leo and Brandon just quietly followed us from behind.

It took us at least two hours until she finally found the pair she wanted. And it was the first pair she chose too.

I'm a girl and I still don't get it. I buy clothes and stuff too but when I look for something, it's not that time-consuming. I see something I like, fits me perfectly and if it's affordable, I buy it.

Nichole was a different case though.

"Why don't you go buy yourself some clothes too." She offered when she noticed the bored look on my face. "I'm gonna buy Leo a new shirt to go with mine. It'll take time, you know it."

I was about to protest until Brandon put his hand on my head and patted it. Not in an affectionate way, if anyone's curious.

"Ooh couple-items," he sounded like he just got another bright idea. I narrowed my eyes at him suspiciously but he just grinned deviously. "We'll look for things like that too. Right potato sweety?"

I gave him my best fake smile. Don't back down Mira. You can take him. "Of course my potato darling. But don't forget rule number one."

"Who could forget rule number one," he chuckled as his hand fell to my shoulder. He was side-hugging me. "We pay separately as usual."

He gave me another grin before we both turned to our best friends. "Text us where you are when you're done."

"Okay!" Nichole chirped happily.

If this guy was playing another game, then he better expect to lose.

"How about this one?" He pointed at the two shirts in front of us. I studied it a bit and shook my head.

"No. Too common."

It was a couple shirt. It was red and one shirt read 'he's mine' with an arrow pointing to the left while the other shirt read 'I'm hers' with an arrow pointing to the right.

Brandon quietly agreed with me and we proceeded to find a more suitable couple-item for us.

I don't understand why we need to get one since we're not a real couple anyway, and we were just playing a stupid game.

But I still went with it. Why.

Something caught my eye but as I was about to show it to him, he quickly took my hand pulled me to the opposite direction.

"What - "

"This." He smirked as he stretched the fabric to my face. I gaped at him. "This is perfect."

It was...

Oh my God I can't even say it. It's so embarrassing!

Pause for dramatic effect.

Okay. Here it goes.

It was a potato-patterned shirt set. A shirt and pair of boxers for the guy and a cropped shirt with matching shorts for the girl. It was a pyjama couple set.

I can't believe it even existed.

I grabbed the tiny pair of shorts Brandon was holding to my face and put it back on the hanger. He gave me a playful questioning look.

"Why buy it when nobody'll see it?" I said, trying to make a point.

"It's not for anybody to see," he took it again and gave the female set to me. "It's for our eyes only."

I shoved it back to where it belonged. "When and where are we going to wear this, exactly?"

"When we have a sleepover, duh." He took it again and gave it back to me as he took the male set. "Unless of course, you have other ideas?"

He smirked as I raised a brow. "A sleepover, really? With just the two of us?"

"Yup," he wagged his brows suggestively. "Doesn't the idea sound exciting?"

I was about to punch him for even bothering with the idea when I remembered: we were just playing a game. There was absolutely no harm in this.

I changed my attitude and smiled at him, holding my set firmly against my chest. I think I'll have a little fun with this.

"Okay," I said, linking my arm with his. I looked up to his smug expression and grinned innocently. "Let's try these things out then."

He returned my grin. "Wanna share the same dressing room? It'll be more convenient for everybody."

The corner of my lip curled up. I was open to the suggestion. I was ready for the challenge. "Let's."

We were currently inside the dressing room, and luckily it was big enough to fit the two of us and left enough space for us to move around.

There were two full mirrors on the two walls in the room, and the light was great. Not to mention the many hooks on the vacant wall. It was so convenient.

The small space between the two of us kind of made me panic there for a bit, but after seeing his smirking face, the panic slowly dissolved into determination.

We'll see Brandon. We'll see who flinches first.

"Okay. Undress," I gestured to him as I hung my bag on one of the hooks. His eyes widened when I said that.

Oops. A little too misleading, wasn't it?

"Slow down my feisty little potato," he chuckled. "Although I do like that part about you too."

I laughed. "You're yet to like the whole of me then. Now hurry. Undress."

If I'm not mistaken, I think I saw a hint of panic cross his face. Oh. Was this scaredy potato just bluffing when he suggested we fit the couple set together?

"Why just me?" He said. "You should too."

"What," I challenged. "Not confident with our body now are we?"

He looked offended and I just wanted to laugh. Why oh why did I find this so funny? Or maybe I was just getting excited.

He quickly took his shirt off, revealing his perfectly toned muscles. I forgot he was an athlete, I forgot what sport. He may not have the ideal six-pack, but it was all good. It was all damn good.

I tried to act like I was used to seeing men's bodies and was silently hoping my cheeks wouldn't give me away.

I nodded my head as if I was approving. When I looked up at him, he was grinning. I bit my lip unconsciously.

I'm digging my own grave I knew. Sue me.

"Now let's try this thing on," I quickly took the potato-patterned shirt and wore it over his head, which was a bit of a challenge in itself since he was taller than me.

It was a perfect fit. I tried to wake up the inner seductress in me so I can make this whole process quicker and win the game, but it was a risk.

How stupid will I look, oh God.

Well. Might as well try anyway.

I pretended to pat the the shirt on him while in fact I was feeling his abs underneath the cloth. My hand was slightly trembling.

What the hell what the hell what the hell am I doing.

"Fits perfectly," I silently wished my voice didn't stutter.

"Yeah..." His voice sounded strangled. When I looked at our reflections in the mirror, I almost - almost - flinched. Why was he looking at me with that dangerous expression?

I'm not scared. I can be... Scarier.

"Now for the boxers," I avoided his gaze and looked down. My hands were on the button of his jeans before I knew it, and I mentally hit myself. Was I getting a little too into this? "I'll help you take your pants off."

"No!" He was quick to react. I withdrew my hands immediately. His ears were getting red and I just knew he was getting flustered. I was relieved to know I wasn't the only one. "I'll - I'll do it. Thanks."

He did it pretty quick. As soon as he took off his pants, he slid the matching potato-boxers up his legs up to his waist. After he wore the whole set, he grinned at his reflection a little childishly, making a few ridiculous poses at that.

"I rock this potato-pyjama-set."

"You sure do," I laughed, taking my phone out to take a picture - no - a lot of pictures. This was just too great an opportunity to pass.

Brandon was no kill-joy either. He practically made every stupid pose known to man. It was such an epic attempt, imitating Victoria's Secret angel's poses and facial expressions.

It was so disgusting it was hilarious.

When our fill of pictures and laughter were satisfied, he smirked at me.

"Now it's your turn." He said as he took the female set off the hanger. "Now, undress."

Was I laughing just a while ago? Suddenly I don't know what's so funny anymore.

I tried to keep my breathing steady. I started this. He's just copying what I did to him. I can't be flustered. Otherwise, I'd lose.

"C'mon Mira, potato baby," he teased, wiggling the shirt in front of my face. When I was unresponsive for a few seconds, he grinned triumphantly. "Not confident with our body now are we?"

Damn him to hell for using my own words against me. Damn me too for using it without thinking.

I straightened my back and gave him my best game smirk.

Screw it.


Hungry asf. I was craving for cheese the whole time I wrote this chapter. French fries. Hash browns. Cheesy food. Cheese. Mmm.

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