I run up to the house as fast as I could, not bothering to even lock the car. How could I? My baby was probably lying helpless in his room and bleeding. It didn’t occur to me that something like this would happen, but that was because I had never really thought to understand the magnitude of his situation. I knew it was something he did, but I hadn’t stopped to think it was this severe and that he was this fragile. It hurt to know that he had done this just to cope with my being angry at him, just as he done with the drugs when he hurting from being lied to by his parents.
I knocked as loud as I could and the door opened to reveal an older looking woman who I had never met before. She looked to be in her fifties or late forties. I knew she wasn’t his mother since I had met both of them before but definitely not the woman who stood before me.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“I’m here to see Aiden” I stated desperately and pushed past her to enter the house. I run ahead to the stairs, my main focus being to get to him as fast as I could. I stopped dead in my tracks when I realized that I had no idea where his room was. I turned back to the woman and she was looking at me with sad eyes, making me wonder, did she know?
“Second floor, first door on your right” she said and with a nod of thanks, I run up to my baby.
I wasn’t thinking straight. When I got to his door, my first instinct was to knock it down, thinking that he had locked it. But then, after entering, I realized wouldn’t know what to do as I wasn’t even sure how he looked like. I had never experienced this sort of thing before.
So I took in a fee deep breaths and pushed the door open gently.
“Oh baby” I gasped when I saw Aiden sitting on the floor against his bed holding his wrists and crying in pain. I rushed there instantly and knelt beside him.
“Aiden” I called softly to get his attention since his eyes were closed. His eyes shot open and locked with mine. I couldn’t decipher how he was feeling just by looking in them, I wasn’t sure if there was pain or relief or a mixture of both. Without much thinking, I embraced him gently whiles on my knees.
“I’m sorry” he sobbed against my chest, “so sorry”.
I tightened my hold on him, hoping that it would comfort him in some way. I hated hearing his voice crack in such agony. What had I done to my beautiful boy? I honestly had no idea what to say because I didn’t think any amount of words could comfort him. I simply allowed him to cry against my chest for as long as he wanted.
When his sobs died down, I pulled back from him, ignoring his protests and took a look at his wrists. The bleeding had stopped, and thankfully, I knew a little bit of first aid from working in a bar for so long. I still thought he needed medical attention because who knew how much blood he had already lost to begin with?
“Baby” I whispered against his ears.
“Mmh?” he hummed making me bite my lip.
“I’m gonna take you to the bathroom okay?” I said and he nodded. I carried him, bridal style in my arms and walked to the adjoining bathroom. I couldn’t even stand and admire how big it was. I set him in the tub and asked where he kept his first aid kit. He pointed to a drawer beneath a broken mirror. It was then that I saw that broken pieces of glass scattered all over the floor.
I bit my lip in anger, not at him but at myself. Why had I let him leave just like that? I should have known something like this would happen. Kyle told me and I refused to listen.
Sighing, I hurried to get the kit out of the drawer, although making sure that I did not step in any piece of broken glass. I felt his eyes on me as I administered first aid to his wrists.
I wanted to talk to him, to hear why he did this but all I could think of was, how could I help him to overcome this?
When I was done, I carried him again and took him to his bed, setting him down gently. I pulled the covers on him and tucked him in.
When I went to leave the room to tell the lady about the mess in the bathroom, Aiden stopped me with the saddest voice ever.
“Please don’t leave”.
I nodded at that and went to lay beside him, effectively spooning him and holding him to my chest.
“I’m sorry for what I did” he apologized, and at this point I wasn’t sure if it was about my family or about his habit of cutting.
“You are okay baby” I whispered and kissed the top of his head. “I’m sorry for being angry”.
“It’s okay” he whispered back. “I understand why you were angry. I should have done that. I crossed a line and it wasn’t my place to do so. I’m really sorry, I hope you can forgive me. We don’t have to go if you don’t want to” he said.
“Thank you” I answered, kissing the top of his head again. At least, now we had talked about it. This only made me realized that there was no need to be angry on my part but at that time, I couldn’t have helped it. It wasn’t every day that your loved one betrayed your trust but after talking about it, I realized it shouldn’t have gotten this far.
I spared a glance at his bandaged wrists. I really wanted to talk about it but I couldn’t think of a way to bring it up. ‘Hey, why do you cut?’ didn’t seem like a nice conversation starter. Besides, it was quite sensitive and I didn’t want to trigger any bad memories or pain. It also wasn’t right to force it out of him and I had to wait until he was ready. I really did want to understand why Aiden felt as though he needed to cut. It even made me wonder, was he suicidal?
“I’m assuming you want to talk about this?” Aiden asked, gesturing to his bandaged wrists.
I shrugged. Of course I wanted to, but was now the time? “We don’t have to if you don’t want to” I stated instead.
“Bullshit! That’s just what people say when they really want to talk about something” he stated and if not for the smirk on his face, I would have thought he was angry. “Don’t worry I want to” he said.
“Okay. Why?” I asked.
“It just helps. With the pain, I mean”.
I frowned, confused as to what he meant by that but that didn’t do any good since he couldn’t see me.
“Not physical pain. Mental and emotional, I guess. It’s just that I can’t really handle the mental and emotional turmoil of having to go through something that I can’t really handle, in simpler words. When I do it I feel that pain on my body instead and with that, I can simply tell myself that it doesn’t hurt as much and that it will stop soon enough” he explained.
I couldn’t say that I understood because I didn’t. No amount of explanation would make me understand why someone would want to hurt themselves like that.
“Stop judging me. You won’t understand”.
“I’m not judging you baby” I stated immediately, because I wasn’t. I wouldn’t. “It’s true that I don’t understand it and I really don’t think it’s right sweetheart. I think that you’re hurting yourself even more when you do this. It’s causing more harm than good” I explained.
“Don’t you think I know that?” he shouted at me, getting up from the bed and away from my arms. “I’ve been told times without number that it’s causing more harm than good, I’ve had enough lectures to know that. I don’t need you judging me for it too” he said angrily. I couldn’t help it. I just really wanted to hug him until he could no longer feel pain.
Before I could say anything, Aiden laid back down, took my arm and placed it on his torso. I smiled as a deep blush coated his cheeks. “You’re adorable” I whispered to him.
“I’m not a child” he pouted and I couldn’t help but smile even wider.
“Baby, I’m not judging you. I just want you to know that you don’t have to do this. If you’ve had this lecture times without number, then you can understand why I’m worried. I’m here for you. You can always vent your anger or whatever pain you’re feeling with me. I love you and I don’t want to see you in pain, whether it’s mental, emotional or physical. Do you understand me?”
“You love me?” he asked, his voice soft and small.
“Yes, I do. I can’t think of a moment when I didn’t love you Aiden”.
“I love you too” he says as he sits up to look at me. Hearing those words come out of his mouth made my day brighter than it had ever been. “I love you so much Brian, you don’t even know how much” he whispered and captured my lips in his, kissing me deeply and softly.
My hands immediately went to his waist and I pulled him closer to me as my tongue explored his mouth. Aiden straddled me and run his hands through my hair. He was perfect. I loved how our mouths moved in sync, proving how perfect we were for each other. I loved every part of him, I realized. I traced a kiss to his neck, sucking and biting at the flesh and making him moan.
I loved hearing him moan.
Aiden rolled his hips against mine making my cock even harder than it already was. This boy always got me hot and hard. He kept doing it over and over again and it was killing me inside because no matter how much I wanted to be inside of him, I couldn’t and I needed to settle with this.
“I love you so much baby” I said against his skin.
“I love you too” he moaned helplessly. Before I knew it, Aiden’s hands were fumbling with the string on my pants. “I want you” he whispered and kissed me again. “Please” he said.
I tried stopping him. Believe me, I tried but Aiden was much stronger than he looked. “We shouldn’t...ah fuck” I moaned as I was cut off by Aiden’s hands on my cock, stroking me as fast as he could while his other hand was working to remove the belt on his jeans.
“No. Please. You don’t understand, I need you. I need you inside me” he said huskily making my eyes roll back.
This boy was going to be the death of me.
I flipped us over almost immediately such that I was lying on top of him. I removed his belt and opened his jeans as fast as I could. Without wasting time, I pulled them down, not bothering to be gentle. I couldn’t be, not with how he was looking up at me with such desperate lust-filled eyes.
The moment I got him naked, I took my time to admire how gorgeous his skin was. He was clean shaven, his cock was up and ready, pointing at me. I licked my lips in anticipation. I couldn’t wait to get my lips on that. But first...
“Aiden, are you okay?” I heard Kyle’s voice shout from outside the room.
“Fuck off Kyle!” I shouted at him.
“I just want to check up on him”.
“I’m fine, now fuck off!” Aiden shouted even louder than me and I smirked.
“No need be rude. I just wanted to check up on you. It’s not like you’re having... OH MY GOD!” he screamed and I laughed. I waited a few seconds, sighing in relief when I heard a pair of footsteps running down the stairs.
“Fucking cock block” I laughed.
“I know right” Aiden shook his head.
“Now, where were we?”
“You were about to fuck me, hard and rough”
I drew in a sharp breath. “I love it when you talk like that” I admitted and he smirked.
“Please hurry” he begged.
Oh baby, the things I’m going to do to you, but not that. Because I knew that he wasn’t ready for that, not yet and after what had happened, I couldn’t take advantage of him like that. What I could do was give him the pleasure he deserved. I pushed his legs apart and took a good look at his glorious pink hole. Perfect, I thought and placed my lips there, kissing softly.
“What are you doing?”
“Relax baby. You’ll love this” I assured him with a wink and went back to working on his whole.
By the time I was done licking and sucking at his beautiful hole, Aiden was a hot and sticky mess. He moaned and bucked at every thrust of my tongue to his hole. I enjoyed rimming him just as much as I enjoyed hearing his desperate moans of need and pleasure.
I pushed further into his hole, making it slick and wet with my tongue but not enough to actually stretch him. I would have to leave that for later. Whiles still enjoying the taste of his ass, I stroked his cock with much fervency, making him buck and thrust into my arms, fighting for release.
I felt it coming before he said it and immediately engulfed the head of his dick in my mouth, sucking him to completion and then drinking every bit of him until he was calm.
“That, that was...” he stuttered as his eyes rolled back and he backed limp on the bed. I smirked and kissed him softly.
My baby, I thought. I loved him so much.
“Let’s do it again” he said when I pulled back. “But I want to do it this time” he insisted and I laughed.
“Have you ever rubbed your cock on another boy’s cock?” I asked, effectively taking his mind off that.
“No” he admitted, blushing deeply.
With that, I straddled him and aligned our cocks. Even though Aiden wasn’t as big as me, he was still close enough in length so it worked out perfectly. I trusted my hips up, making our dicks rub together messily before stroking us both with my hand.
I placed my free hand on the back of Aiden’s neck and kissed him deeply and with so much hunger. In a few minutes, we came undone and I licked our essence off his chest as he looked at me with love.
“I love you baby” I said.
“I love you too” he replied.
We were still in his bed together, cuddling when I received a text from my boss informing me that Zander had woken up. Aiden was about drifting off to sleep but I knew I couldn’t leave just like that since he also wanted to see Zander. So I woke him up and helped him dress up.
We went downstairs to find Kyle and Niall sitting in the kitchen, talking with the lady.
“Zander is awake” I said to them. “We’re going to see him now”.
Kyle nodded at that and picked up his car keys from the counter.
“Go with them baby, I’ll be out in a second” I said to Aiden and kissed his forehead. When he left, I spoke to the lady whose name was Maria, telling her of the mess in Aiden’s bathroom.
She nodded with a grim look on her face and I understood that this was wasn’t the first time it had happened. When she assured me that she’ll take care of it, I went to meet up with them and together, we went to the hospital.
Zander had been moved from the intensive care unit to a normal ward and apparently, he was still as chatty and rude as ever.
“Hey asshole” he greeted when he saw me.
“Nice to see you’re back to normal” I rolled my eyes. He said nothing at that and went to look at Aiden.
“Hey pumpkin” he smiled at him. “I heard you found me”.
Aiden nodded. I could tell that he was at a loss for words and honestly, I would be too if I were in his shoes.
“Come here and give me a hug” Zander beckoned.
“Are you sure?” Aiden asked, his voice small and unsure.
“Of course. I’m okay now, remember?”
I watched as Aiden went to hug him and couldn’t help but smile with pride. When everyone had come to see him, I took Aiden to the nurses’ station and asked that they took a look at his cuts. He protested at first, saying that they would take him to a psych ward but after assuring him that they wouldn’t, he agreed.
Although, I had to make sure that the nurse was aware that he wasn’t suicidal and that he was already seeing a therapist.
Somehow, I thought that Aiden’s parents should also be made aware of this because no matter how I looked at it, this was serious. Not only could he have been seriously injured, he could have died and I hated the thought of losing him.
“So, what happened with lover boy’s arms?” Zander asked when I went to see him again whiles Aiden was getting treated, with Niall and Kyle comforting him.
“Just stuff” I shrugged but he looked at me weirdly making me spew all my frustration to him. I didn’t want to, given as he was in a hospital bed, but that was the thing with Zander. He always cared about others, more than he should.
“You’re an idiot” he said when I finished talking.
“You’re the biggest idiot to have ever lived. Don’t you think it’s time to finally get some closure from that rat bastard you call father?”
“I don’t know Zander; you know what he said to me”.
“Yes, but you’re grown now. I think it’s time for you to show him that even though he abandoned you, you still managed to stay on your feet. You’re better off than he could ever hope to be. And you also need to do this for yourself, your mom and your sister. I know how much you miss them”.
“You think so?”
“I know so. Go tell lover boy how much you love him and that you’re ready to face your demons. Now get out of my room idiot” he said, shooing me away.