The Moon Inside of Me

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Who are you and what you did with Claudio?

“Everyone knows how to love in his own way; the way matters little; what is essential is that you know how to love ” - Machado de Assis, Resurrection.

We talked a little longer before the bell rang and I had to return to the last classes of the day. Claudio pestered me to find out what I was doing so much in the library, and I successfully avoided all his attempts.

Soon my best friend got tired of Natasha and got bored with the life of a lone wolf. For the first time, I wasn’t there, waiting for him with my open arms to welcome my friend, and that made him very uncomfortable.

- Are you seeing someone? - At the end of the last day of the week, almost a month after my visit to the Museum of Tomorrow, he stopped me in the hallway with the brutality of a rhino, holding me so I wouldn’t escape.

“No ...”, our eyes met for a few seconds. If it were any other time, the shock of those green orbs would kill me with tension, but now they reminded me of a mountain of fetid moss. “And even if it were, that wouldn’t be a problem, would it?”

- It would be. - The words escaped like a whisper from those big lips. With the yellow light of the lamps, his tanned skin turned a strange shade of gold, like that of a statue.

My heart stopped.

- Why would it be? - That’s all I could say.

“I don’t know ...”, he answered, widening the distance between us with a step back. His big hands were in his pockets, something Claudio did only when he was really upset. - It just would be.

- It doesn’t make much sense since until a few days ago you had a mountain of walking hormones stuck to your pants. By the way, where’s Natasha?

- I shit for Natasha. - Again, the brutality of his words filled my chest with anxiety. In all the years we studied together, the boy had never acted that way. “Before, you were always with me, we did everything together, and now I need to do what to see you? Schedule an appointment?"

- I’ve only been busy ...

- With what? - The nervousness in his gaze had given way to a dangerous feeling: Impatience. I felt that if I didn’t get out of this situation soon, things could end badly.

- We’re in a school, Claudio! For God! I’m busy studying! - Using a ferocity previously unknown to me, I pushed his body away and fled like a madwoman, running and panting through the halls of the school.

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