Amidst Brokenness Memories and Impossibilities

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Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Morning light began to shine onto my face, and the sound of the birds just outside the window were enough to begin to rouse me. I had the worst headache imaginable, and I felt like my head was literally going to split open. I reached for my cellphone almost automatically to check the time, but instead of hitting my sister’s bed stand, I hit a warm body beside me. I slid my hand down to gently coil around the warm frame, assuming it was Belle, and I cracked my eyes open slowly, and was instantly met with an unfamiliar sight.

“Fuck!” I breathed out, and sat bolt upright as I noticed that the warm, naked frame next to me, wasn’t my sister at all, but it was Anna. Her best friend.

It took a few moments, but the events of the night before were slowly beginning to come back to me. How I had helped her up the stairs, and into her bed, falling onto it beside her. Then the atrocities that came after. My body wasn’t just Belle’s anymore. I flicked my eyes shut, and tried to shake away the memories. Anna was already sitting up beside me however, and she looked just as mortified as I did.

Moving to grip the bedclothes she moved them up to cover her chest, but it wasn’t as though she needed to. I had already seen her form the night before. I lowered my head into my hands, and I instantly regretted everything. Why had I decided this would be a good idea? In what alternate reality did I not return home to my sister whom would never forgive me for this?

I clenched my jaw together, and finally shoved the covers back from my form, beginning to gather my clothes off of the floor. I was putting them on quickly, before pulling my phone out of my pocket. It was already eleven. Belle probably wondered why I hadn’t even bothered to come home last night. I should have went home. I shouldn’t have come up here.

“This didn’t happen.” I breathed out as I moved to stand beside the bed, looking down at Anna. “Belle, never finds out about this…it was…it was fucked up, and wrong, and we didn’t fuck, okay? I didn’t take your virginity. Got it?” I asked her in an outright panic, trying to cover all of my bases inside of my head, knowing just how wrong everything was.

“I would never…tell her.” Anna breathed out, tears were welling in her eyes, and I felt awful for snapping at her in such a cruel way.

“I know…Christ…I do know that.” I admitted, and I sat back down on the bed, and sank my head back into my hands. How could I do such a thing to her? I had fucked her over, along with my sister. I couldn’t believe that I had just stolen my sister’s best friend’s virginity.

“But you can’t tell her…I was a virgin either.” She insisted, and I stared at her as though she were insane.

“How the hell would I know you were a virgin if I didn’t fuck you?! Christ Anna!” I stood back to my feet, and began to pace the room in a frantic mess. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. I shouldn’t have come here, why the fuck did I come here?! I was shaking, and desperately trying to make it stop.

“Right…you wouldn’t.” She mentioned as though she too were losing her mind. Perhaps we both were together, and that was alright too.

“Why would you lie to her about something like that anyway?” I asked still trying to wrap my head around another having touched me, and claimed me that I had willingly allowed to do so.

“I wanted to seem cool at the time. I didn’t want anyone to know I was a virginal cheerleader, so I made it up…alright? I am not perfect, but neither are you.” She snapped at me, and stood to her feet, finally finding the motivation to begin pulling on her own clothes.

“Whatever. All I know is that Belle is going to lose it even more than she already has, if she ever finds out I so much as kissed you. We can’t ever let her know. I got drunk, and I crashed on your couch. That is it, alright? I never touched you, you never touched me. We can’t let her know what we did.” I insisted, and she nodded as she looked at me softly.

“Fine, Gabriel. I got it.” She straightened her hair as she finished changing, and I tapped a quick text to my sister, letting her know I was awake, and coming home.

“Good.” I took a step towards her, and kissed her forehead, before I turned from where she was standing, and walked out the door. The house was trashed to say the least. Beer cans, and alcohol bottles littered the hallways, and it was evident someone had gotten into the toilet paper, and had thrown it at one another. Other people had clearly gotten ahold of dart guns, and been shooting them. The place was a class A nightmare, and I knew she would probably spend most of the day cleaning it. I stepped over passed out bodies, and other madness as I made my way down the stairs, and towards the front door. I took one final look around, taking in the madness of the situation sprawled out before me, seeing balloons, literally the floor, and trash literally everywhere. Cups, and household objects strewn from one side of the living room to the other. I felt a pull in my stomach that told me she needed someone to help her clean up the mess, but then I remembered how I had texted my sister, and told her that I was coming home immediately. I couldn’t just stay even longer, I didn’t want her to think I was avoiding going back. So I released a low sigh and pulled the door closed behind me, heading towards the car to leave.

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