I've been playing the game of life for over 21 years. It hasn't gotten any harder. It depends on how old you are, and where you've grown up on what type of path you go on. You can either go on the path of riches, where you go to college, you get a job as a lawyer, then have a large successful family.
Or you can be like the other half, you can grow up in the slums with nothing. Then become nothing. Now I should mention, some people have an exception. Some people are on a rich path then lose everything, and some people are in the slums and then become world-renown surgeons.
It all depends on what you want to do with life.
My mother once told me the story of the two sons. The story goes that there was once a family, one drunken alcoholic father, who was abusive. He had two twin sons. One son became an alcoholic just like his father, while the other became very successful.
People sometimes like to blame their upbringing on their failures in life. I like to think that is bullshit. You can do whatever you want, even if you have nothing. It all matters if you are a hard worker or not.
But once again there are exceptions, some people who are in the slums, even if they work so hard, they don't make it. It just happens.
Life sucks. Life is filled with pain and regret. Some lucky people are lucky enough that they can succeed. But you have to remember, that not everything is all rainbows. Even some of the richest and most successful CEO's have a shitty life.
They may look tough or they may look happy with their lives. But so much happens behind closed doors. Lies and betrayal happen behind the walls of those large mansions.
Like I said earlier, some people are in the middle of the rich and the poor. That's where I am. But I am in the worst part.
My name is Beverly Santino. I am the daughter of the largest Mafia leader in Italy. now, as I said earlier, things happen behind closed doors. I am rich, but nothing is as good as it seems. I go to school for the rich, I have a beautiful car, I have a rich and successful family and boyfriend. I look like I hit the jackpot on life.
But if you truly think that, then you are dead wrong. I mentioned that lies and betrayal happen behind closed doors. Now replace the words lies and betrayal with murder, and drugs.
Now the words lie and betrayal sounds like rainbows next to those words. My life isn't easy. This whole bullshit princess act that I carry around with me at the campus is not who I am at all.
Behind closed doors I am a murder, I am a trained assassin. My whole life I have been getting ready for my take over. But I will get into that later.
Right now, I have to sit through another 2 hours of class. It sucks so bad. I am in my mat class that is crazy hard. I hate the teacher too, they truly suck donkey balls.
All they do is fucking lecture all damn day and it just makes me want to blow my damn brains out. "Hey, Bev. How was your weekend?" Meredith asked me.
"Shitty. My father made me spend 5 hours shotting at the same damn target in the middle of the night. He's such a fucking asshole sometimes. Like shit, I'm only 21, I don't want to stay up to 3 in the morning shooting a damn gun that I already know how to shoot."
Little side note, Meredith and I have been besties since grade school. She was the new girl and she was getting picked on, so I stood up for her and we've been like sisters ever since. She also knows everything about the mafia so it's easy to talk to her.
"I'm sorry Bev, I hate that he is so hard on you. I wish that he could understand that you understand all of this stuff." Meredith said looking at me. Her eyes softened and she gave me a small smile. "Don't worry, it will get easier, we just have to take it one day at a time." She told me.
"It's easy for you to say, you don't have your dad so far up your ass," I said rolling my eyes. "Well, I don't have a dad for starters." She said and I instantly regretted what I said. "Shit Meredith, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it in a mean way, I shouldn't have said that." I said regretting my words.
"No, no, I'm totally over it. He was a huge fuck face in the first place. I never liked him anyway. I don't care. But your dad is just pushing you to become the best damn leader that has ever lived." Meredith explained.
I shook my head. "No, he is just making sure that when he dies, I don't die. He doesn't want his daughter to die just like my mom did." I told her. "Do you still think about her?" Meredith asked me. "All the time. My father obsesses over her." I told her.
"Is he seriously still trying to find her killer? It's been 15 years!" Meredith asked me comely surprised. I nodded. "It's insane. I think Claire is getting sick and tired of it."
"I would too if my husband was still looking for revenge on his ex-wife," Meredith spoke. "I would too, but you can't blame him. One group just came into the house and shot her multiple times with no warning, he still blames himself. I think that if it wasn't for me, he would have killed himself a long time ago, to be honest." I said.
"Let's stop thinking about this, it's getting way too dark. Let's just focus on what Mrs.Fern is talking about." Meredith said and instantly switched her attention over to the math professor.
"Good morning! I know it's Friday and you guys are tired from the long week and can't wait to get back to partying and drinking, but we still have 3 hours left in the day and we still have to learn!" Mrs.Fern explained.
I rolled my eyes. "What a bitch," I mumbled. Mrs.Ferns eyes went instantly to me. "Do you have something to say Ms.Santino?" she asked me. She put her hands together in front of her and glared at me. I shook my head not wanting her to call my father and tell her that I am this close to getting kicked out of her class.
"No Ms.Santino, please tell the class what you want to say." She said walking toward me. Meredith and I were in the 3rd row of the classroom. As soon as she was standing in front of me, my heart stopped. I may be a strong kid and all, but when it comes to my father, I am use to backing down and listening to him.
“ I said what a nice day,” I said and smiled at her. I turned a Meredith who looks like she was about to burst out laughing. Meredith thought this was funny as hell.
Mrs. Fern rolled her eyes at me. After that, she headed back down to her podium. She began to teach the class and I wasn’t listening to a damn thing she was saying.
While she was teaching, I was too busy drawing in my notebook. That was one thing I love to do when I was stressed out. Drawing. I especially love to draw people.
I love to draw myself into a world that I would love to be in. One where I was happy, had the perfect boyfriend, had the perfect family.
But I guess, especially since the world that I live in, none of that will ever happen. My current boyfriend Connor is just a big douche. All he cares about is making sure he stays with me. And if he does, then he can be the second in command.
And that’s all that men one, power. Am I right? I mean not all men are like that. Just the men in my world.
They are all deceiving, lying, manipulative bastards. My guess is, that if I do end up marrying and having children with him, he will have a mistress. Most men in the business do.
To be honest, even though I’ve barely told anybody this, and when I say that it means I’ve only told Meredith.
My father cheated on my mother, no matter how much he said that he loved her, he did cheat on her.
I remember this, when I was four years old I remember walking in on him with one of the women that he was working with, and she was sitting on his desk with him between her legs.
I never told my mother about that, because I thought it was normal. I never gave a second thought about it.
I wish I told her, maybe it would’ve saved her from her death. Up until I was about 18, I blamed my father for my mother's death. I would tell him that I hated him and that it was all his fault.
I knew deep down he loved her, but for some reason, he couldn’t just keep it at his pants. My mother's death drove my father crazy. Because when she was killed, not just one person died.
At the time, when my mother was killed, she was six months pregnant with my baby brother. My guess was, that this time was perfectly planned out. Whoever killed her, knew that she was pregnant and that they were killing the future leader.
As I said earlier, the world that I lived in is completely fucked up.
I don't know how else to describe it.
Love is a crazy thing, and right now, I've never felt true love. Or any type of love other than family love. Love is a weakness, it ruins people.
I always thought I would never fall in love, but I guess that's not what God has planned for me. Because soon, I'll meet somebody that will change my life forever. Somebody that will make me do things I never thought I would ever do.
Love is a crazy thing, isn't it?