Secrects & Desires (ManXMan)

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Chapter 2: Unhealed Scars

Alexander’s POV:
“Check my schedule and see if I have anything after 9 p.m.,” I ask Lyla while checking the reports of our new deal with Nagasaki Enterprise.

“Sir, you have a appointment with Mr. McAdam at 9 p.m., then you have a conference with Alaska group at 9: 30 p.m. and after that you have to meet with Mr. Steve Angelo at 10:15 p.m.“, she answers slowly while looking at her iPad. “And after that your schedule is clear up to tomorrow 8 a.m.”

“Well, cancel all the appointments I have after 9 p.m. and make new schedule for all them.“, I order her.

“S-Sir?“, she squeak in horror. “Bu-But we can’t afford to change them now. You have a full packed schedule for this m-month and the next two months. It will be im-impossible to rearrange all those now”, she stutters while informing me.

“Well, I think you can arrange those. After all this is exactly for what you are here.“, I answer her with my no nonsense voice which seems make many people shut their mouth and I really am glad to see it works for her too.

Clearly frightens by my tone of voice, she flees from my room.

Jesus, this girl is just too much. She always takes too much time in everything she do. Can’t wait till Mathew comes back soon from whatever hell he had gone for last three weeks with his family. Well, I know I shouldn’t be mad at him for Lyla’s clumsiness but Mathew is always the person who arrange my schedule although he and Lyla are both my personal secretaries.

I notice the time showing in my laptop and surprise to see it is already 7:02 p.m.

Two hours to go.


I should have said no to him. I should not have let him make me agree. Suddenly I feel terrified of what I am going to face today.

You are sick.

Suddenly I hear her voice in my head so clearly like she is telling me now.

You are as much twisted as I am.

No, I am not.

Yes, you are.


You can’t live without me.

I cover my ears to shut her out but I can still hear her voice.

You will always come back to me, no matter how you try to resist. You’re nothing without me.


“Sir, are you alright?”

Suddenly Lyla’s voice brings me back to the present.

I remove my hands from my ears and look at her to find her looking at me in a strange way.

“Yes, I am,” I try to answer her while trying to steady my wild heart beat. Shit! I was about to have one of those panic attacks I haven’t had for last five years. I used to have those frequently eight years ago.

“Are you sure? You are sweating too much.“, she asks me in a anxious voice.

“Yes. What the hell you want?” I snap.

I know it’s not her fault that I am fucked up in head, but I don’t want to be reminded by her that I can’t even control this when I am inside the office building, doing work.

I am so ashamed of myself. I’m Alexander Neumann, CEO of this UMICO multinational and only son of Owner of this company, not supposed to behave like this. Someone like me, doesn’t have the luxury of wasting time by having panic attack like the pathetic boy I used to be eight years ago. I’m changed now and I will not let my past to hunt me just because I am going somewhere which reminds me of something.

I can’t let my family down by my behaviors.

“I came here to inform y-you that I managed to re-reschedule your appointments,” she stutters again with a weak pathetic voice like she is about to cry any moment.

Crap. Now I am feeling really bad for her.

“I’m sorry, Lyla,” I apologise to her in the my most sincere voice I could mange while trying to control my frantic heartbeat and also sweating profusely.

Lyla looks surprised by this.

“No, it’s okay, Sir,” she tells me in a normal voice and giving me a weak smile which I try my best to return.

“Is there anything more?” I ask, clearly wants to dismiss her since I still need finish my work.

“No Sir,” saying this, she let herself out of my room.

I heave a sigh of relief and make myself more comfortable in my chair after unbuttoning first two buttons of my dress shirt.

I rub my forehead when I feel a painful headache there. I haven’t get there yet and I am already this way. What the hell is going to happen after I go there.


“You are 29 minutes 17 seconds late,” I inform Andrew when I open the door of my car for him to take the passenger seat. I am really tired of waiting for him for almost half hour in front of his apartment building.

“Well, not everyone can always count the seconds they takes to breath,” he tries of mock my punctuality and justify his behaviour of always being late by making some smart ass comment.

I roll my eyes at him. Some people can never change no matter how much you try. Not that I want to change anything about him. I love my best friend the way he is.

“Nice car, by the way,” Andrew admire my new Ferrari FXX-K and it manages to bring a genuine smile on my face, even though I was in the foul mood for last 2 hours.

What can I say I just love my toys.

“Thanks.“, I replies him. “I only brought this one five days ago. It is just like a LaFerrari hypercar with 1,036 hp.......,” then I start telling him about my new gorgeous red car in details.


30 minutes later, I park my car in front of five storey building with the word DARK written on it.

“I know perhaps you already know but I just want to say this one more time,” I tell him after giving my car key and a large tip to the valet boy who seems to be too excited to see my car.

“I wasn’t joking when I said I will leave without you if you aren’t done after 50 minutes,” I tell him while looking at his eyes to show him I am dead serious. Although I cleared my schedule for today but I am not comfortable to be here more than necessary.

Why? Aren’t you going love in there?

Again I here her voice whispering in my ear mockingly and I shake my head to clear this.

“Okay. Alright. I already know that,” Andrew’s irritated voice, makes me aware of my surrounding again.

“No need to get your panties in a twist. We will leave immediately after I final the deal with Mr. Herrnann and get the papers I needed to finish my work,” fortunately Andrew continue to tell me totally missing my odd behavior few seconds ago. “Just don’t you dare to leave without me or I will tell your fiancée about your every secret girlfriend.”

“I never had a secret girlfriend.“, I manage to tell him evenly.

“Well, she doesn’t know that,” he tells me before giving me a wink and I have to laugh at him. Andrew always manages to make my mood better.

“So, are we ever going inside or not?” he asks me since we are still standing before the huge gate of the club.

“Okay. Let’s get inside,” I tell him after heaving a deep sigh.

We start walking in direction of front door and now about to cross it. Though I am sure, nothing is going to happen in there and we are just going there for Andrew’s work and leave immediately after that. But why I am having this feeling that everything in my life will change if I cross that door.

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