Loving Ammah

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Chapter 25

Ammah's POV





It's been five days since Faisal dropped me off at home and five good days since I've heard from him. No calls, no goodnight texts, no goodnight kisses, no showing up randomly at my room, no flowers delivered early in the morning, no cheesy romantic quotes, nothing nothing. I've called him and texted him more than hundred times but no reply.

What is wrong with him? I've heard from ya Abba that aunty Hawwau is in ICU for the past five days and Faisal is slowly losing control. The twins spend most of their days in my house with Humaira, mama and I. Today was quite different though cause mama made her delicious chin-chin and chocolate chip cookies to cheer everyone up and Khalifa should be here any minute from Kano, he is starting university on Monday.

"Amna please help me with the banner" Hummy said climbing the stool.

"Sure" Amna replied as they put on the welcome Khalifa banner. Mama wants him to feel at home and welcome so were decorating the living room for him.

I check my phone for the up tenth time to see any message or missed call from Faisal but I got nothing. Why do I have this little hope in me that he will come back to me. He can't just stop talking to me, and start avoiding me without any explanation.

The living room was wonderfully decorated and Amna was happier than anybody. She rushed to open the door when she heard the door bell ring and immediately wrap him in a big bear hug. Aww how cute!

"Ehem! Ehem! Khalifa my dear I still exist you know" Humaira said sarcastically and he laughed

"Hello my beautiful cousin" he greet hugging her

"Hello partner in crime" she greet back.

"And Safinat is alive too" Saf coughed and he walk over to hug her.

"The queen of books" he teased and she pinch him on his cheek

"And the king of cheerfulness" she teased back.

"Then there is my dearest of them all, hi Ammah" he hugged me

"Fish head" I ruffled his hair and he frown

"You had to do that" he said trying to make his hair perfect again, boys and their hair of a thing! Huff.

"Finally my human diary is here" I muttered sadly.

"I'm always here when you need me" he said and I smile warmly.

"I know" I stated and he kiss me on my cheek before walking to the kitchen to meet mama.

After we ate the small chops and cold Chapman I made earlier, Khalifa and I lay on my bed in my room and stare at the ceiling.

"So know you guys don't talk" Khalifa said as I finish narrating what happened between Faisal and I.

"I miss him" I hiccupped hiding my face in the crook of his neck and inhaling his scent. Fuck too much deodorant! Typical Khalifa..

"Don't cry over a boy, he does not deserve your precious tears" he said and I cry more.

"You do when you love him so much" I add

"You see the problem of girls they fall in love when they are not suppose to" he said and I sit up to face him.

"What do you mean?" I ask

"_we should love not fall in love cause everything that falls gets broken. -Taylor Swift" he quote and I smile.

"You always know what to say to make me feel better"

"Yeah I do. Now promise me you won't cry over a boy ever again"

"I will try my best not to" I gave him a small smile and he roll his eyes at me.



***




"Ammah, mama is calling you" Safinat inform as I finished reading the holy Qur'an.

"Okay" I simply replied standing up, I didn't bother removing my hijab as I keep the Qur'an on my study table and fold the prayer mat.

Walking over to mama's room, I see her seated on her bed holding a rosary in her hand, her eyes were closed as her lips parted slowly indicating she is reciting her azkhar. I watch her for a few minutes as her chest fall up and down rapidly.. Mama looks so tired yet beautiful.

I sit by her bed and massage her legs softly and she flip her eyes open.

"When did you arrive?" She asked

"Few minutes ago. You sent for me?" I asked

"Ah yes! I've been meaning to talk to you since we returned from Kano but I didn't get the chance" she said taking a deep breath

"My baby you know mama will always wish good for you, no mother will want to see her child last or not succeed in life. Ammah you are no more a child, you are know old enough to make your life decisions but I'll always be here to guide you towards the right path.

As your mother I have the right to choose a suitor for you but the marriage will not take place without your Consent. Ahmad is a great child, he will keep you happy. You know since day one I saw him, when he came with his family to ask for your sister's hand in marriage I admired him." She said softly yet her words hit me like a thrown piercing my skin. Hot tears stream down my cheek slowly as reality hits me.

"Mama are you fed up of me already?" I croaked out my voice coming out hoarse.

"No my darling I will never be fed up of you, It's just that I want to see all my children married and see them settle in life. I want to see them making new and beautiful memories with their spouse and create a new family. This old woman here wants to see her grandkids before going back to her lord.

Let me tell you something my love, In the name of Allah the most gracious, the most merciful said; "He there not been over man a long period of Time, when he was nothing–(not even)–mentioned?

Verily we created man from a drop of mingled sperm, in order to try him: so We gave him (the gifts) of hearing and sight. We showed him the Way: whether he should he grateful or ungrateful."


So tell me do you want to be grateful to your Lord? If yes the only way to do that at your stage is to get married and complete half your deen that way you can please your Lord and In Sha Allah enter paradise" she finished and I let each and every word she said digest into my head. I hold my knees to my chest and cry quietly as the words sink into me.

"Mama I will marry whoever you want me to, I know you will choose the best for me. I trust you." I said laying my head on her lap and I could feel her smile patting my head.

"Alhamdulilah. Allah ya raya min ke, auta na"

"Ameen.." I whispered before drifting into sleep.



-



It's been two days after my conversation with mama and seven days without Faisal. Many questions are running in my head.. Are we dating? Are we not dating? Are we together? Or are we on a break? So many unanswered questions ya Allah. More to add to my problems I gave my word to mama that I will marry whoever she chooses for me. Why is my life so confusing?

"Hey Ammah where are you lost at?" Yesmin asked me snapping her fingers.

"Sorry, what were you saying?" I asked and she sigh

"Your thinking about him right?" She asked placing her hand on top of mine smiling sadly "I over heard him and Abba talking that the doctor's are losing hope on his mom's case. He is depressed, he needs love but his ego is not letting him to get the love from you" she said

"Do you think he will come around?" I asked with the little hope left in me.

"They always do" she smiled making my heart at ease. The door to my bedroom opened and Amnat came in panting heavily, her eyes are red bloodshot and her face was covered in tears.

"She is gone." She whispered before collapsing in the floor.


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