Loving Ammah

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Chapter 27

I give you Faisal's POV.... :)

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The woman who gave birth to me,

Who nourished me,

The one who held and fed me,

Who understood me better than I understand myself,

The one who cleaned up my mess, who was always with me through thick or thin.

She was the one who was with me when I was sick, she stayed up all night holding me tight to her warm body. She is the one who picked me up whenever I fell, clean my cut and no one but her cared the most. She was the one whose hugs were always the best, the one who wipes away my tears with kisses when I cry and knows all my fears. Who really cared... She was not fake like the others she was really real and know she is gone.

My mother.. My beloved amma is gone. She left me all alone in this world, everything is too fake to be real. How can she leave when I still need her, who will correct me when I'm wrong exactly no one cause she left me.

What did I ever do to her that she is tired of me and she left? I gave her all my love, I listened to her advice and I was so close to her that it was actually pretty hard to separate us. I gave her my respect and honour, I obeyed all her command's and wishes, I pay good mind to her when she was talking, I took good care of her and her needs, I thought only of her when I was away from my family members, I stayed right close to her amidst strangers and never said no to her upon all that she really did leave me.

I hit my fist on the wall and my hand start dripping from blood. It's been three good days already and it feels like years locked in a dungeon which is actually a hotel room. I left home cause I couldn't bring my self to meet Ammah after what I did to her.. Ina lilahi. I hurt her for goodness sake, what has gotten into me. I'm shunning people out of my life I'm hurting the people who still care about me, I'm running away from my responsibilities of taking care of my younger ones this is so not me.

I ignored my girlfriend for a week and asked her brother not to tell her anything about what happened.. I don't need her to know. I indirectly told her I don't trust her which might have hurt really bad but she's gotta understand I'm still trying to figure out myself too, I promise I'll figure out us soon.

The door to the hotel room opened and Abba came in. He is the only one that knows I'm here, he dropped some food on the table and look at me then my bleeding knuckles.

"How many times I'm I going to tell you hurting your self is not the solution?" He asked getting the first aid box. I decide not to answer that question so I watch him dress the wound concerned.

"I'm fine" I assured as he bandaged my knuckle.

"Yeah you look fine" he scoffed keeping away the box and opening the pack of KFC he bought.

"I'm not hungry" I mumbled and he glare at me.

"You didn't eat since yesterday morning" he rolled his eyes "now eat!" He command and I sigh seeing I have no choice.

"The twins have been asking me about you" he start after a long silence "they want to see you, Faisal they need you please go back home"

"They've got Ammah and your mom they will be fine"

"They need YOU stop acting like a big baby and go help your siblings. Your being stupid they are as devastated about the death like you are. Don't forget they also lost their mom but do you see them acting like you? No because they are acting matured and accepting the fact she will never come back and they are dealing with life how she would have wanted them too. I'm sick of seeing you like this, quit moping around and hiding in the hotel room it ain't gonna do you any good okay?" He finished standing up, he dropped the keys to my car on the table and look at me

"Your choice" and with that he left.

-

I drive home as the gate opened immediately recognizing my car, I drive in and park the car in front of the house that holds so many memories of amma. Getting off I hand the driver the keys and he proceed to parking the car at the right place.

I entered the house with a heavy heart and went to the kitchen and standing is Ammah cooking, when she heard footsteps she turned around and our eyes lock. She smiled at me and I couldn't bring myself to smile back at her so I put the hood of my hoodie over my head and walk out of the kitchen.

I walked to the twins room were they were both on their devices and talking among each other. Amnat was the one that first saw me and when she did she ran and hugged me tight.

"Ya Faisal where have you been?" She asked with tears in her eyes

"Do you know how worried we were?" Safinat asked hugging me too.

"I'm so sorry" was all I could say

"I missed you, I miss amma too and Ameera" Amna the sentimental one cried

"Baby please don't cry, you know I hate it when any of you cry" I plead and she sniff.

"Ya Faisal when will Ameera be back?" Safinat asked

"In a weeks time In Sha Allah" I replied

"Can I ask you something?" She continued nervously

"What is it?" I asked frowning

"Is baba in Nigeria?" She asked quietly

"Were never talking about him, understood?!" I yelled

"I was just asking.. But understood" she said and I take a deep breath calming down

"Sorry" I whispered

"We get it don't worry yourself it all feels so new and hard for us but we will get through this as long as we are together" she said and I smiled hugging her

"Eyee! When did my baby sister become so smart?" I teased and she blush covering her face

"Ya faisallll" she dragged and I laughed

"Now can we please go shopping, Khalifa and Humaira will be here in five" Amnat said getting up.

"Your still in touch with that guy right? I thought I told you my decision"

"Ya Faisal it's not like that, he is just really nice and he helped me over come amma's grief again we are just friends I swear I will never date him or anyone unless you give your permission" she said

"They are just friends, I promise" Safinat add and I rub my hand over my forehead

"Just defending your twin huh?"

"Nope, aswear it's the truth"

"Fine I believe you guys. I'all he in my room have fun" I said getting up

"Ya Faisal you are forgetting something" Amnat said placing her hand forward in an attempt to collect something from me

"What?"

"Your ATM card"

Don't you guys have your own?" I asked confused

"We do but i'm saving my own money on something and Safinat is not sharing her ATM with me ever since I last spent fifty thousand on a bag without her knowing"

"And that was so not funny" Safinat barked and I laugh

"You selfish monkey. It's all yours but stay in your limits"

"Your the best, thank you" she jumped on me and kissed me

"Love you guys" I say before going to my room. I take a long refreshing hot shower before changing into my adidas black sweatpants and a black plain vneck t-shirt, I put on my black hoodie where yet again I bumped into Ammah, she hugged me placing her head on my chest making me so shocked and confused.

"I missed you baby na" she whispered standing on her tiptoes to kiss my cheek. She watch me closely waiting for a reply instead my eyes trail down her body where I hurt her, I pull her shirt up trying to see the wound clearly but she stop me.

"I'm fine" she said stopping me

"Let go" I whispered yet determination lacked in my voice. She slowly remove her hand from her shirt and I pull it up revealing scars on her breast and chest. The scars are deep and just looking at it could make you imagine the pain. I touch it gently and she shriek, it's paining her. I trail my hand on the scars feeling the need to kill my self, I did this to her. I hurt Ammah, my baby Ammah.

I look at her face, tears were streaming down and her eyes are closed. She is in so much pain and I cause it

"I'm sorry" I whispered wiping away her tears "I'm so sorry please forgive me" I plead

"It wasn't intentionally okay?" She reasoned opening her eyes

"I can't take this anymore" I say moving backwards. "I think it will be better if I'm nowhere close to you" I add

"Faisal no" she argued "I'll appreciate it if you don't ever cross path with me or talk to me. enjoy your life single lady!" And with that I left her crying my name out.


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