There was a knock on the door and I looked up to see Elliot standing there.
“Is she asleep?”
“Yea, I need to get to Sophia.”
“Let me switch you spots.” I kissed her forehead and carefully pulled her off me. She whimpered and Elliot lay down and she stopped. I sighed and went back to Sophie’s where Sophia still was. I walked in and Sophie gave me a half-smile as I walked over to her.
“How is she?”
“The best she can be, we talked a little bit. Before I left she fell asleep, Elliot is with her now.”
“Good. I’m really worried about her.”
“Right now she just needs us to listen and be there. I’m worried about how she would be with the girls. I think she would be okay with Soph, but I don’t want to take that risk.”
“Thank you, Rickey.”
“Your welcome, if she needs me or you guys need any help just let me know.”
“Daddy, we go.”
“Yea, go say bye to everyone.”
We said goodbye to everyone and headed back to my place. I carried her inside where Cammie was watching a movie.
“Hi.” I set her down and she wrapped her arms around my leg. I sighed and brought her over to the couch and she curled up to me.
“I want to see mommy.”
“I know honey. She’s still pretty upset right now. Uncle Elliot is there with her now.”
“When can I see her?”
“Soon okay.” She sobbed and got off me and went over to the door.
“Sophia,” I yelled.
“I want mommy.” She opened the door and I quickly ran after her before she got too far. I scooped her up and she screamed while she sobbed.
“I don’t want you, I want mommy.” It hurt, but she needs her mom right now. I brought her back inside and just rocked her.
“Mommy.” She sobbed.
“I’m trying princess okay.” She pulled away from me and went to her room slamming the door.
“What is happening?” Cammie frowned.
“Colin was killed by a drunk driver, to be expected McKenna is not taking it well. She doesn’t want to see the girls, she just wants to be alone. They haven’t seen their mom since yesterday morning. Sophia knows, but doesn’t understand it.”
“That is so terrible, did you see her?”
“Yea, we talked for a little bit then she cried herself to sleep.”
“That is so sad. Did you tell her we would help?”
“Yea.” Sophia finally stopped so she must have fallen asleep. I got up and went to her room finding her on the floor asleep, so I picked her up and set her on her.
“Love you baby girl so much.” I kissed her forehead and went back into the living room.
“So you want to go to bed?” I nodded and we went into my room and changed before curling. I held her close remember how good McKenna felt next to me.
I woke up to Sophia curled up next to me and I sighed. I hated seeing her like this, but there is nothing I can do. Hopefully, McKenna will want to see them. They need her just as much as she needs them.
“Can we see momma?”
“You’re going to nanas and I’m going to try and talk to mommy.”
“I want to see her.”
“I know.” My heart aches for my little girl.
I woke up surprised to find Elliot next to me.
“Hey, little sis.”
“Where’s Rickey?” I frowned looking around for him.
“We traded. He stayed with Sophia last night.” I nodded and sighed. I missed my girls, but I’m just not ready to face them.
“Are you hungry or anything?”
“You need to eat.”
“I don’t want to, now just leave me alone.”
“Get the hell out of my house,” I yelled. He sighed and left leaving me alone. I know everyone is just trying to help, but they can’t bring him back. There was a knock on the door making me groan.
“I said go away, Elliot.”
“Good thing I’m not Elliot.” I looked up finding Rickey smirking as he came and sat at the end of the bed. I reached for him and he moved to lay next to me pulling me into his arms.
“I don’t want to make you mad or anything, but Sophia wants to see you.”
“I’m not ready.”
“Okay.” I nodded.
“I miss them, I do, but I just can’t look at them especially Ellie.” He nodded and just kissed my forehead as he held me.
“I miss him so much. He is so amazing.”
“He was, he was so good to you and the girls.”
“What am I going to tell Ellie?”
“Well right now you don’t have to tell her anything. You will tell her that her dad was a great guy and tell him all the amazing things he’s done.”
I hate this so much. Ellie is never going to know just how amazing her daddy was.
“Does Sophia know?”
“Yea, but of course he doesn’t understand it. She’s just asking for you right now.”
“Do you think it would be good to see her? I don’t want to freak her out.”
“Yes, you need her just as much as she needs you.”
“Fine, go get her.”
“I’ll just text your mom.” I nodded burying my face in his chest.
“Thank you for being here and just listening.”
“It’s what you need. You don’t need someone bothering you. I will make you eat and shower though.”
“We’ll see.” I smiled and he looked up at him finding him smiling at me.
“I’m glad I got you to smile.” I pulled away from him and went to the bathroom before coming back to lie down.
“Where are you going?” I frowned watching him leave.
“Our daughter is here.” I nodded and lay back down as he went to get Sophia.
“I see mommy?”
“Sure are princess.”
The door opened and I heard Rickey set her down.
“Is she sleeping?”
“No,” I said.
“Come here, baby.” I felt her climb on the bed and she crawled right into my arms. I kissed the top of her head as I wrapped my arms around her while she snuggled into me.
“Mommy.” She cried.
“I got you.”
“I miss you, I don’t like when you’re sad.”
“That’s why you’re going to be with daddy and Nana for a little bit. I don’t want you seeing me like this.”
“No, I want you.” She held onto me sobbing. I knew I shouldn’t push them away, but they didn’t need to see me like this. I looked up at Rickey and he looked broken. I looked back down at Sophia and pushed the hair out of her face.
“Baby look at me.” She looked up at me and wiped her tears away.
“I love you so much, but mommy needs to be alone and wrap my head around this. I just need time.”
“I never see you.”
“Yes, you will.”
“I don’t want to leave you.” She sobbed.
“You have to.”
“No.” I was breaking our hearts, but she needed to understand.
“Soph come here.” Rickey tried pulling her. She only curled into me more and held onto me tighter as she sobbed.