The emptiness was.
Her eyes showed absolutely zero emotions. Her actions didn't seem forced by any means but it still scared him deeply.
She wasn't alright and he wasn't sure what to do. He had come with the idea of not leaving her alone, even for a second. He didn't want to lose the only person he had to hold onto as well.
He wasn't going to let her lose herself to the darkness. Sadly, he wasn't aware that she had already given up to it.
"We're here," Jax turned the car off, turning towards Ann and pausing when he saw her staring outside the window aimlessly. "We're here, Ann." He said once again, this time she turned towards him so quick he was scared that she must've snapped her neck.
She looked at his face for a while before nodding and stepping out of the car. He quietly followed behind. She turned around, confused as to why her friend was following her.
"Why are you following me?" Her question felt more like a statement and once again it lacked any signs of emotions.
"I thought we should be going to check up on Selena, no?" Those were the first words that came to his mind and he mentally cursed himself for his stupidity.
"But we just got here."
"I'm really worried, Ann. We should go check up on her." It wasn't a lie, his words spoke the truth. He had been worried for their friend. Whenever he would call her, she would either say she was busy or not attend at all. It was very unlike her.
"Fine, let's go then." She gestured for him to take the lead which he did. He silently made his way back to his car, worry starting to gnaw back at his chest.
He would be lying if he said he wasn't scared.
Taking in a deep breath, he willed for his nerves to calm down. It helped to a certain extent but not as much as he would've hoped.
He opened the door and took his seat, Ann following his actions. He switched the car into ignition and the both of them drove off to their friends house.
No words were exchanged during the ride, the silence was unnerving but none of them wanted to break it. It oddly felt good. It allowed the both of them to get lost into their own worries in silence.
"We're here." He whispered, stepping out of his car once again and staring at his friend's house in worry and fear. He really hoped everything was alright.
"Let's go inside." Jax said once again and went to lightly knock on the door. No one responded at first so he knocked again, this time louder. Still he received no response.
Please let everything be okay.
He mentally prayed before twisting and turning the door knob and starting to knock on the door louder. He paused for a second when he heard his friend whisper some disturbing words.
"She's also dead, because of me." Her words lacked emotion as they had been for the past couple of hours, moreover the laugh that bubbled passed her throat, that cold and sinister laugh was what chilled him to the bone.
He saw the tears glistening in her eyes but he also saw how her face was completely void of emotions.
She was chained in the back of her mind by her own demons
"Please don't say that, Ann. I'm sure she's okay. Let me call her." He quickly brought out his phone and dialed Selena's number. His movements were rather jerky because of his trembling hands.
Bringing the phone to his ear, he waited for her to pick up. Waited for her to say 'What do you want, bitch?'. Waited for her to scream at him for ruining his sleep.
But none of that happened.
His hope died and so did his heart. He stuffed his phone back into his pocket, failing at the first attempt because of his blurred vision from the tears clouding his eyes.
"S-she won't pick up, Ann. I don't know. She won't pick up." He whispered before knocking at door violently again. He heard her make a sound of disapproval.
"I told you, he killed her. Just like he did to all the people close to me." Her words hurt him deeply knowing that she believed each and every word she had just said. It hurt him.
He moved back a bit before loudly pouncing on the door, successfully managing to break it apart.
He sighed in relief before turning to Ann."Let's go now." She nodded her head and followed behind. Jax felt a wave of de javu hit him seeing his surroundings.
They brought back such good memories.
"Selena, where are you?" Jax yelled, his voice echoing throughout the eerily quite house. He threw a look behind him to see if Ann was still following him and sure enough she was.
"Selena!" He yelled out again, still receiving no response except silence. "She won't respond." Her words were meek, he had barely caught onto them. He paused for a second before continuing again, not answering her statement. The statement that he feared.
"Let's go check her room." Grabbing Ann's hand, he took the both of them to her room which happened to be on the second floor.
Climbing up the stairs, they made their way to her room. The door was closed but light seeped through the little space at the bottom. Taking in a sharp breath, he knocked at the door, waiting for a response once again.
He knew Selena wasn't a deep sleeper but in the moment he really wished that was the case.
"She's not going to open it, break it." Ann added, lightly rocking on her feet as she stared at the door ahead of them. He nodded his head but decided to check if the door was open already or not and to his surprise it was.
He didn't want to open the door but he knew he had to. Lightly twisting the knob, he opened the door.
Nothing could express what he felt at that moment.
Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw.
There hung a pale and gaunt looking Selena with a noose tightly wrapped around her neck, the rope turning her skin blue from the pressure.
Her eyes were closed while her mouth was slightly open. Her lips had lost the red tint they used to possess, they had now become a chilling shade of blue and purple.
Her cheeks were gaunt and pale, also lacking the warmth they once possessed. Her cheekbone was protruding just like the bones on her ribcage which was visible through her cropped shirt.
Cuts littered her arms and legs, they were a clear sign of self infliction. Her usually shiny hair now had seemed to lose its shine and looked ashy.
Terrified. That's what he felt. He was having a hard time believing what he was witnessing.
"No." It was a quiet whisper, very quiet. He barely heard it with the sound of his pounding heart. Slowly turning around, he looked at a terrified Ann, her expression matched his.
There was just one thing different. Her face was blank and so were her eyes but if someone stared deep enough, they would see the fear clawing at her blue orbs.
He quickly stepped up to remove the rope around her neck while also mindlinking some warriors to bring an ambulance.
He wanted to find out what had caused his friends death. He knew the signs were of suicide but he could never be too sure. The ex-beta was a cunning and sadistic wolf.
Gently removing the rope, he laid her down on the messy bed. He turned towards a frozen Ann. She looked pale.
"Y-you should go sit in the car, okay?" He mumbled, hesitance clear in his voice. He didn't want to let her out of his sight. He was afraid to do so but then again he didn't want her here, seeing her friend like this as well. She was already harboring so much guilt, he didn't want to add on to it.
She gave him a single nod before leaving. Bringing his hand up, he rubbed his eyes to remove the tears clouding them.
He looked around the room and saw a single note lying on the vanity. Carefully, he went towards it and picked it up in trembling hands.
Unfolding the paper, he stared at the cursive words in utter fear and hatred.
Two down and you have already broken down love. I can't wait to see your face when I kill your mate in front of you.
He tore the paper in such an aggressive manner that one would think he was deranged. Throwing the pieces away, he clutched onto his blonde locks, looking up at the ceiling with tears streaming down on his face. He wasn't sure if the tears were of sadness or pure anger.
"Why moon goddess? Why are you doing this to her?" He whispered, falling down on his knees as he sobbed with his head in his hands.
His friend had never even hurt a fly then why did she have to pay such a huge price? She didn't deserve all this hurt, she only deserved happiness. It had been so long since he last saw her genuinely smile. He couldn't even remember the happy girl she used to be.
The distant sounds of sirens made him stand up. Just as he did, he heard various sounds coming from the ground floor and knew the warriors were here.
He glanced at Selena and felt a lump form in his throat. He had abused her, it hurt him deeply to know their friend had to go through so much all because of that fucked up man.
That man deserved pain and he would be damned if he didn't give him that.
"Beta." A couple of warriors came and gave a nod to him which he returned. They brought a stretcher with them on which they laid Selena.
"I'm not sure where her mother is but please arrange a burial for her. We are not sure how long her body must've been here." It felt so odd referring to her as a body now. It disturbed him.
The warriors nodded and left. He silently searched around the room for evidence, just something but couldn't find any. The rope had also been taken by the warriors.
With a sigh, he left the room. Suddenly a thought hit him. A terrifying thought.
He had left Ann all alone.
He felt as if the breath had been knocked out from him as he ran downstairs quickly. Scary possibilities started playing in his mind as panic and fear took over him.
He finally arrived at his car and released a huge sigh of relief when he saw that she was quietly sitting inside the car.
He quickly sat inside the car and without saying anything, drove off back to the house.
Not a single word was exchanged between them throughout the whole ride. It was quiet, except for the occasional sniffles by him.
He stepped out of the car as soon as they arrived and waited for Ann to get out as well. She quietly stepped out and started moving towards the house, her pace was slow and it seemed that her body had also given up on her.
"Are you alright?" He wasn't sure why he had asked that question when he already knew her answer.
"I'm fine." Her response was slow and an absolute lie. She was anything but fine. He nodded his head, clearly not convinced but decided not to question.
"You haven't eaten in days, Ann. Please eat something." He pleaded, hoping she would listen to him and surprisingly she did.
"Fine, let's go." She whispered before changing her direction and moving to the dining room. He nodded his head and went to the kitchen to request the maids for food.
"Can you please prepare a meal for two?" He asked as soon as he stepped into the kitchen. A young girl who must be around the age of nineteen nodded her head with a bow before starting to prepare the meal. He muttered a small "thanks" to her before leaving.
Sitting down next to Ann, he observed her. She was playing with her hands that sat on the table, her eyes focused on them.
"Please don't hide your emotions from me, Ann. You are the only one I have right now." He suddenly blurted out causing her to turn and look at him. She stared at him for a while, her face still emotionless. Finally, she snapped away from their staring competition and shrugged.
"I would hide them if I had any." Her answer was simple and straightforward but she didn't realize the depth of her words. They held a dangerous depth to them, one that he didn't want to wander off in.
"You-" He started but was cut off by the maid who came to serve them. He decided not to continue and just quietly sat, watching as the maid served them.
He stared at the contents of the meal which looked absolutely delicious. There were steamed vegetables, cut meat, sour bread and tomato soup. It seemed like a mouthwatering meal.
But it only managed to make him even more nauseated than before.
His mind was still repeating the image he had seen barely an hour ago. It made him want to puke.
He decided to take a bite but got stopped by a hand around his arm. He looked at Ann confused as to why she stopped him.
"It might be poisoned." She whispered, staring at the food as if it were about to attack her any second. Her words made sense. With all that had been going, he wouldn't be surprised if the food was poisoned as well.
"What should we do then?" He wasn't sure how they were supposed to figure out if the food was poisoned or not.
Ann shrugged before saying, "I'll taste it. If it is poisoned and I do eat it, his whole plan would go down the drain because he killed the person for whom he was doing all this." He gaped at her, surprised that she thought he would ever let her do such a thing.
"You're not doing that. No way." He shook his head in disapproval. Ann just raised a brow at him before asking, "Well, do you have any better ideas then?" He thought over her words for a few seconds before nodding.
"We could cook for ourselves." She just shrugged, gesturing him to go ahead. They both stood up and went to the kitchen.
The maids working there looked confused seeing the Beta and Luna in the kitchen. Their first guess was that they had somehow messed up.
"Can I help you, Luna?" The maid from early asked, her voice wavering ever so slightly. Ann just shook her head.
"We just wanted to cook for ourselves." Jax said with a small smile, hoping to ease some of the fear the poor girl was feeling but his words seemed to have the exact opposite effect.
The girl's eyes widened in fear as she stuttered, "W-was the food n-ot good? I'm so sorry, I haven't been here for long. I tr-ried my absolute best." Jax shook his head quickly, managing to stop the girl.
"Hey, hey calm down. We just felt like cooking for ourselves. That's all. You guys can take your leave now." He said with a smile and the girl nodded. All the maids also nodded at his words before leaving the kitchen.
"What should we make?" He asked as soon as the maids were gone. A shrug was all he received.
"Well, I suppose we could make pasta." Jax muttered, searching around for the ingredients. He kind of regretted not asking the maid for the ingredients.
When he couldn't find them, he sighed and decided to mind link the maid. She appeared a few minutes later. Ann was still silently standing in the corner, seeming lost.
"Y-you need help, beta?" The maid whispers, staring around confused. He turns towards her and nods before moving his hand and gesturing towards the whole kitchen.
"I need ingredients to make pasta but I can't seem to find them," He pauses, his eyes moving to the salt lying on the counter, "Except salt."
The maid nods her head and gathers all the ingredients for the pasta, setting them all on the counter. Giving a slight bow, she leaves.
"Let's cook now I guess." He mutters, picking up a pot and filling it with water.
After about an hour later, he was done. Letting out a sigh, he dished out the pasta onto two plates.
"Here." He passed one plate over to Ann as the both of them ate in silence. Well, she ate a bit while he just played with his food.
"I want to go see Xavier after this," She whispered after a while, continuing once again, "I miss him." Jax bit his tongue at the sad expression on her face. This was probably the only time she must've showed her emotions and of course they were negative.
Why did he even expect something positive?
"Sure, eat first please." She nodded her head and continued eating her meal. He stared at the food in front of him in distaste. All he wanted to do was breakdown but he had no one. He had Ann but he couldn't do that, it would just add onto the guilt she felt. He didn't want her feeling anymore guilty.
"I'm done." He looked up at her words and saw her pushing her plate away, her plate that was still filled with food. She had barely even taken three bites.
"You have barely eaten anything. Your health is worrying me." Jax said worriedly. She bit her lip and gave him a smile. "You don't have to worry about it, you won't have to soon enough." She whispered the last part, her whisper was so quiet that even she could barely hear it.
He nodded his head warily before standing up. "You can go meet the alpha, I'll check up on Hazel and…" He trailed off, not wanting to continue his sentence. Ann just nodded her head and left the dining room.
A full blown smile settled on her face as she thought about meeting her mate. Jax looked at her from the corner of his eyes and smiled slightly when he saw the smile on face. What he didn't know was that this was probably the last time she would ever do that.
It was all going to end very soon.