chapter 2 the one where he knocks
Trinidad; somewhere in the North coast
12 years later
Kailey looked outside her window and closed her eyes. The sun wasn’t even up as yet. She loved the fresh clean air and the sounds of the waves, the ’no people’ noise except for the very few people that appreciated the solitude. Very soon she had to face reality as she had an early appointment to keep. Her staff were very capable of taking care of things but seem to not function with efficiency when she wasn’t around them. She smiled at that thought. Her seniors all had that thought it seemed. She loved her professional career choice. A doctor, at first because she hoped it would bring her closer to him. Now she loved being a pediatrician. She loved children. She often thought that she would have married him and have kids by now!
After a failed marriage she still thought of him! Heck, during her marriage she thought of him! Every girl on the street had a crush on him! Even her friends that came over to hang out with her! Their teenage years were spent mostly admiring Max’s one single curl of hair that fell across his forehead and her girlfriends’ envy of her being close to him. And Kailey loved it! Especially when he walked around bare chested knowing they were watching him playing the guitar in his parents’ garage. Sometimes he used to play for her and he was so captivating. The band didn’t make it though and just the memory of it, of him, filled her with joy and sadness. Oh well. Her day was about to start better get that coffee up.
As she opened her door that night at 9pm, Kailey felt the same as this morning. She missed him. Her daily life evolved around thoughts of him. As long as she was not on her job, she thought of him. It always was him and she hated him for it. Why couldn’t she keep him away from her mind? Sometimes she felt she was going crazy.
The last time she saw Max was three years ago. On her wedding day. Her eyes filled with tears at the memory of it.
She had gotten married to Dylan to prove to herself that she could live without him. That she didn’t need him. She recognized that it wasn’t healthy to be that way. To feel that way about him. Max only watched and never said anything to her as she took her vows. He knew how she felt about him. Everyone knew. Her parents begged her to forget him. Her mother’s tears were the last thing she remembered before agreeing to marry Dr. Dylan Chance. And he was perfect in every way.
They were right. Even the Walkers were right. She was waiting for a dream that would never happen!
Kailey almost collapsed on her chair from the headache she now had. She swallowed two pills. Every time she had thoughts of him she felt her head splitting. She just couldn’t seem to shake him.
Dylan knew. He found out when he accused her of having an affair a year and six months ago.
She laughed so hard back then. She wasn’t having an affair she told him.
“I don’t believe you.!!! Why are you so light-headed lately ?? You forget things. You don’t hear me at times when I speak to you!! You’re always thinking of him!”
Dylan looked so hurt at that moment. It pained her to see him like that. He was always a good husband and always tending to her every wimp. He was too good. He deserved better. Everyone should have a Dylan in their lives she often thought.
“I am thinking of a man Dylan but it’s not what you think.”
Her voice sounded so lifeless as she said it. She knew her marriage was over then. She had looked at him. Really looked at Dylan. Her husband was so handsome and treated her so well. Did he love her ? She hadn’t thought so at first. But he stood by his vows and took the meaning of the marriage deeply. When they were dating he was infatuated with her. And they did say they loved each other every day but did they ever really mean it.? She didn’t think so. He was always understanding and they had developed a sort of friendship over the years. They had been dating for a year when he proposed to her and another year before she agreed and four months later she was Mrs. Chance.
So in the name of friendship she told him. It hurt her too when she did. She saw his hurt. She never knew he cared so much for her. But no it wasn’t love. He just cared. He was hurt, she understood that, so when he took a few minutes to take it all in she was not surprised when he asked her to seek therapy. He still tried to help her. Even till now. They remained friends.
After all he was a psychiatrist. The ironic life she led.
She thought of her parents. And the Walkers. How they said that marriage to Dylan Chance is just what she needed. The good doctor is what they called him.
Kailey had felt so ashamed, of herself, having to tell her husband about her feelings for another man, who didn’t love her. Who just wanted to make sure she was okay. A man who made sure there was nothing romantic about their relationship at all. But seeing her husband’s pity for her made her agree with him. A few weeks after she spoke to him about Max and she agreed to see a therapist.
Dylan made her feel good somehow even through the separation. He was her friend. Until last week when they signed the papers declaring them divorced. And for the first time she saw his reluctance to be separated. It hurt to see him like that but she knew it was best for them both. She moved to the seaside. He would stay in the apartment until the lease was over and then go into looking to buy a house as they agreed. He had no family except his sister, Miranda. But she’s on her sixth honeymoon so he was basically alone. Sometimes she wondered if he was just so afraid of being alone that he got married to her.
She knew though that her ex-husband pitied her!
Kailey swallowed the pills, showered, ate, made it to her bed, wrapped two thick blankets about her body and then put a pillow over her head. No air conditioning or fan was needed as the atmosphere was always chilly at nights because of the cool Caribbean air and sea mixture. If she were inland she would definitely needed the A.C. unit on.Her bed felt lumpy although she knew nothing was wrong with it. As usual he came to mind. Max never left her alone. She was almost thirty years old and divorced with no children and fantasizing about a man that doesn’t love her.
A man that maybe doesn’t exist ....anymore.
The doorbell woke her up. She was startled at first blinking a few times in the darkness to make sure she heard correctly. It was the first time her doorbell rang since she, officially, moved in herself, a week ago, the day she signed the legal documents. Her belongings having been here about two weeks before and she herself having spent time here before she decided to buy it over from a colleague who was migrating. It was a steal of a deal.
Staying in her parents and her childhood home was exactly what she needed and being as her parents were abroad visiting relatives, in New Jersey, she had taken the opportunity. New Jersey also just happen to be the last call she had gotten from Max.
What a muddle.
Not hearing anything she relaxed a bit massaging her now numbed body. Probably the sound of the heavy rainfall woke her. Her headache somewhat better but not gone. Freezing, she wrapped herself in her blanket and sat down on the bed.
She thought of work. She might have to call in a sick day in the morning if it progresses. She didn’t like to cancel her appointments and she’s never had a sick day as yet either. She swallowed two more pills and downed it with the glass of water by her bedside.
Another loud knock.
She got up and put on her bedroom slippers and walked towards the bedroom door and stuck her head out towards the direction of the sound.
She stared at the wide door as another heavy knocking made her jump.
Her neighbour ?
Another knock made her walk out to see who it was. Through the peephole she saw only a t-shirt covered shoulder. Whomsoever it was, was leaning face forward on the door.
Nope. Definitely not the neighbour!
It was so cold! She wondered if it was Dylan. No. Her mind was groggy from sleep.
Kailey was not stupid to open it! She didn’t bother to put on any lights.
She knocked back as hard as she could and peeped again. Then she had a sudden panicked thought about a bandits! She was alone! She should have kept quiet!
The person jolted and stood up a bit to face her. She immediately recognized the voice and the soaking wet face at the same time!
“Kai?” His jawline moved and her mouth became dry.