Chapter 18: Anxiety
Waking up the next morning fully energized, I did my morning routine like usual. Taking a shower, eating breakfast, and getting my school things ready. It sucks not having a phone though! Like seriously how am I suppose to contact anybody? I still have to tell my parents about it, and I don’t think they’re gonna let me go with just a stern lecture this time, there’s the possibility of them grounding me for this.
“Dad! Can you give me a ride this week to school!” I yelled down the hall as I fixed my hair up in a ponytail. I then heard heavy footsteps nearing my room.
“Sure sweetie, but doesn’t Eli usually pick you up?” He said questioning me as he entered my room, he then took a sip of his morning coffee.
“Yeah....but I don’t know if he’s coming this morning?”
“Have you tried calling him?” My father asked finishing the last of his drink.
“Umm, I can’t call him for a while...” I answered him hesitantly while grabbing my bag.
“And why not?” He said raising his eyebrow curiously.
“I’ll just tell you on the ride there, ok Dad? I don’t wanna be late for school this morning.” I told him briefly, avoiding his stare.
“Alright then, let’s get going.” He responded as he headed down the hall.
Putting my flats on I followed my father out of the house. Though I didn’t see my mother in the kitchen this morning, maybe she’s still sleeping? I thought to myself closing the door behind me. I then started to make my way towards the car, where I could see my Dad already waiting for me to get in. Honestly, I wasn’t looking forward to telling him about my phone, but it’s best to just get it out of the way!
“Dad, before you start the car....there’s something important I need to tell you..” I said sounding serious, giving him a worried look.
“Oh no...Luna, you aren’t... pregnant...are you?!” My father asked worriedly with a horrific look on his face.
“What!? N..No, of course, I’m not pregnant! Are you crazy? What would make you think that?”
I couldn’t believe what my father just asked me. I was completely surprised and shocked that he would even think that. Do I come off as becoming a teenage mom in the future to him?!
“Oh okay...that’s good and I’m sorry sweetie I just wanna make sure, I mean you’re starting high school now. Well, you kids sometimes try to grow up too fast and that leads to very irresponsible decisions.” My father said breathing a sigh of relief.
“Well, I could assure you that I’m not pregnant! So let’s stop talking about this, it’s weird! Look....what I wanted to tell you was that...I kinda misplaced my phone at school yesterday..” I responded not being able to look him in the eye.
“You mean you lost it.” My father voiced out sternly turning on the car. He then pulled out of the driveway and began driving me to school.
“Ok...fine, I lost it. An I’m sorry that I did Dad, I guess I was just distracted with my classes and work to notice it missing.” I replied feeling a little bit calmer now that I finally told him, but I’m still a little scared of what my punishment might be?
“Well...I’m glad you told me, sweetie. An...you know what, it’s alright. Your mother and I could just buy you a new phone, but! You have to promise me that you won’t lose this one and that you’ll be good on your grades, do you understand!” He said demanding an answer.
“What? I mean, yeah definitely! I won’t lose it this time, I promise! You don’t have to worry about my grades Dad, I did get honor roll last year. But, I’m a bit surprised and mainly confused that you’re not like, grounding me or something?” I explained to him feeling a little speechless.
“Hmm...I should ground you shouldn’t I?” My father responded with a playful smirk.
“Huh!? No! I take it back, don’t ground me!” I pleaded out feeling stupid for what I said earlier.
“Haha, I’m just kidding sweetie. Ah! By the way, that kid Ren is a really good boy. Before you came he asked for my forgiveness for the commotion he caused that night with Elijah. So I’m glad you made a friend like him, though Alexa on the other hand. I know she’s a wild child by the stories you told me about her.” He responded smiling, letting out small laughter.
“I’m glad he apologized to you personally, but Ren’s friendship with me is a bit complicated,” I said to my Dad while grabbing my school bag and throwing it over my shoulder.
As we approached the school parking lot, I get a sudden flashback of what Eli and I did here last time! Oh my god, I can’t believe we did that in his truck, so embarrassing!
“Well, hopefully, you work things out, and are you, okay sweetie? You look a bit red, you aren’t getting a fever are you?” My father asked with a concerned look as we pulled up near the school.
“I...I’m fine, just a little hot that’s all. Anyway’s, thanks for the ride dad. I love you and I’ll see you later.” I said shyly placing a quick peck on dad’s cheek as I hurried out of the car.
“Luna, do you want me to pick you up after school?” My father quickly asked me.
“Uhh, no it’s okay Dad. I feel like walking today.” I answered him with a smile as I waved him goodbye.
“Alright then, well I love you and take care.” My father waved back as he started to drive off.
Turning myself around I headed towards the front entrance of the school. I wonder if Eli is here yet, I mean I didn’t see his truck parked in the parking lot. So maybe he’s on his way still? I should have asked him yesterday to come to pick me up this morning, that way he could’ve shown me around the school. Though I guess it just slipped my mind considering the conflicts we were going through.
Walking down the hall I made it to my locker grabbing my school books for my class. Shutting the door I gazed at the ring that Eli had given me yesterday, it really is beautiful. No matter how many times I stare at it, I always feel a sense of comfort. As if he’s by my side almost, instantly smiling I let out a small giggle and began walking towards my first-period class.
Approaching my classroom I felt someone’s hand pushing me from behind as well as someone’s foot tripping me. Causing me to fall over making me land on my knees first, though I was able to plant my hands on the floor to stop myself from landing on my face.
However, the sudden pain soon came from both my wrists since I landed wrong on both of them. I quickly got on my knees bring my hands up to shake off the stinging pain that my wrists were now in. Letting out a painful sigh, I looked right in front of me to see my books and papers were now all scattered across the hallway floor.
“Whoops, sorry haha.”
“Tch..so annoying that Eli is wasting his time with a plain-looking girl like you.”
“I know! He’s probably just f*cking around with her. Until he gets bored with this bitch.”
Hearing the many voices of girls talking behind me, I slowly stood myself up and turned around to face them. I instantly felt dizzy and began to shake with anger and disgust, it was that girl Priscilla, who I saw at the party that night. Just looking at her made me want to punch her in the face, but I didn’t stand a chance. Not with the group of girls that were behind her, in fact, they kinda look familiar...Oh! Now I remember, they were the same group of girls that gave me that dirty look on my first day of school when I was with Eli at the school parking lot that morning!
I could instantly tell they were Priscilla’s followers and the last thing I wanna do is start a fight I can’t win. So I chose the ignoring method, and honestly, I think that was the best choice to go by. Because each time I look at Priscilla’s stupid face, I just get a reminder of what she did with Eli. It still kinda hurts whenever I think about it, so I turned myself around and made my way to my books that were on the floor.
“Aww you’re not gonna do anything? That’s no fun.”
“Haha, I guess you’re okay with any girl making out with your ‘boyfriend’. In fact, he came over by my place last night to have a little bit of fun.”
I tried my best to ignore their rude comments as I crouched myself down to pick up my textbooks.
I then heard their footsteps passing right by me as they began walking their way down the hall, as I reached out for one of my binders one of the girls kicked it away from me as well as kicking my fingers in the process.
I quickly pulled my hand back in pain as I let out a groan underneath my breath. I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction that they were getting to me, even though what they were saying was hurtful.
“Don’t worry, Elijah will soon leave your ass after he’s done f*cking you. I mean, who wants to stay with an ugly bitch like you anyway?”
The girl laughed out at me as she made her way to the group of girls waiting for her. Raising my head I saw Priscilla who was looking at me with pure disgust as she began to walk away with her evil minions.
I could feel my body beginning to shake, I looked down at my trembling hands that we’re holding my books tightly. I no longer felt anger, just humiliation that was eating me up inside. I could feel my eyes wanting to tear up with sadness as well as my heart that was beating heavily with grief. I didn’t think girls in this school could be this mean...
“Luna? What are you doing?”
Raising my head again I locked my eyes with Alexa who was approaching me with a worried look in her eye. She bent herself down and began picking up my papers that were still lying on the floor. I didn’t want to worry her so I quickly pulled up a smile to put her at ease.
“Haha, I kinda tripped and dropped all my stuff everywhere, embarrassing right!?” I explained to her letting out small laughter.
“I swear you’re so clumsy sometimes. You know I called you yesterday and this morning but you didn’t answer?!” She said a bit annoyed handing me my school work.
“Oh! I’m sorry, Eli broke- I mean...I lost it somewhere in my house!”
I answered her, almost giving away the truth. As we made it to the classroom we both took our seats that were right by each other.
“Oh my God! An I’m the immature one!?” She responded jokingly.
“You are!” I answered back pushing her shoulder in a playful matter.
Throughout the day in school, I tried my best to avoid Priscilla and her group, but there would be times where they would call me names down the hall. It was starting to get to me since my low self-esteem was already bugging me enough.
As school came to an end, I didn’t see Eli at all! Did he even come to school today? I made my way to the school parking lot in search of his truck, but I couldn’t spot it anywhere.
“I hope he’s not sick or anything...”
I said to myself as I began walking past the parking lot. I then shifted my eyes to a boy who was getting in his car, it was Ren. I quickly turned myself around and began walking the other direction, I didn’t want to risk him seeing me since I’m still upset at him for what he said the other day.
I get it, he has every right to not like Eli after their fight. But calling him a monster, that was just too much. Of course, Eli is a freaking human...I mean sure he could be scary at times, but that’s only when he’s upset. But that doesn’t make him a monster, I’m sure Ren was just seeing things. However, I can’t shake off how serious he was being with me when he was explaining it.
“Hey look, there’s the garbage can!”
I was too deep in thought that I was completely unaware of who was driving up behind me.
Turning my head to the side of the street I saw Priscilla pulling up right next to me in her car, I also saw the girls from this morning in her vehicle as well. Before I could even tell them to leave me alone, they began to throw leftover cafeteria food at me. I instantly felt like vomiting from the strong disgusting odor that the food had. I tried to get away from their assault by running away from the street so they wouldn’t be able to follow me, however, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was running, since I ended up tripping in a puddle.
“What a f*cken loser!”
“Have a nice walk home sl*t!”
The girls yelled out at me with such mean laughter in their voices as they drove off.
“I guess I really am clumsy...” I whispered out to myself feeling pathetic.
Slowly picking myself up I looked down to see my clothes that were now ruined! One side was covered in disgusting cafeteria food that I think has spoiled a few days ago and the other side was just drenched with muddy water. Quickly looking around, I was relieved to see that no one was around to see what just happened, I was already a bit far from the school. But this is still embarrassing to have anyone look at me, I could feel myself wanting to curl up in a ball and just cry!
The cool air passing by only made my wet clothes feel a lot colder against my skin, causing me to shiver uncomfortably. The walk back home was very unpleasant and I felt very stiff not wanting my clothes to touch my skin.
The awkwardness of the many cars that came driving right past me was so embarrassing that I wish I would’ve just stayed home today.
As I finally reached my house I was relieved that neither of my parents were home. I quickly got in the shower letting the water warm up my body. I started to feel myself breathing heavily with anxiety as I brought my hands up to cover my face. Many tears started to fall as I let out the pain that I was holding in all day.
I cried out the whole time I was in the shower, I don’t know if I can handle this abuse at school every day from now on. I did nothing to any of those girls, so why are they being so ruthless to me! As I wiped away the tears, I began to dry myself off. I wasn’t hungry or even felt like doing my homework, all I wanted to do was just lay down for the rest of the day and that’s exactly what I did.
Wrapping my body with my blanket, I thought back as to why Elijah didn’t go to school today? I wish he was here to hold me right now though. To tell me that everything will be okay. Closing my eyes I began to feel myself drift off into a deep sleep, I had a very long and bad day today. So hopefully tomorrow will be different.....
“Sweetie are you okay?” My father asked me curiously as he drove me to school that very next morning.
“Yeah....” I answered simply, as I looked out the window, watching the many cars pass by.
“Okay, you’re just usually more chatty. You didn’t come out of your room last night when your mother and I came home. Oh, by the way, I’ll be picking you up right after school today, understand! I’m not taking no for an answer.” He said pulling up to the school.
“I’m sorry, I was just...under the weather. And alright, I’ll meet you here in the parking lot then, but why are you so strict about picking me up after school today? You usually don’t mind me walking home.” I responded to him stepping out of the car.
“Well, last night there was a horrible accident.” My father explained with uneasiness in his voice, he almost sounded afraid.
“Accident?” I asked with a questioning look.
“It’s nothing for you to worry about, we could talk about it after school alright Luna.”
“Alright then....bye Dad. I’ll see you later.” I said to him closing the door behind me.
“Okay, love you, sweetie.” My father responded as he drove away from the school.
I don’t know if I can handle another day of torment with those girls, but I have to be strong!
Hearing someone calling my name, I immediately turned myself around and saw Alexa running towards me as if someone was chasing her.
“Whoa! Alexa, slow down. Are you okay?! What’s wrong?” I asked worriedly as I watched her trying to catch her breath.
“I’m fine....but did you...see the news this morning?!” She voiced out completely breathless, she then placed her hands on top of my shoulders trying to keep herself balanced from the run she just did earlier, and gave me a shocking look.
“News? Alexa, you know I don’t watch the morning news or any news for that matter. Nothing interesting comes up except the weather.” I said answering her while I fixed her disheveled hair.
“Well, this morning something interesting did come up, though I don’t think I should be using the word interesting for what happened. I think the word scary and horrible is more suitable.” Alexa explained reaching for her phone in her pocket.
“What are you talking about?” I asked giving her a weird look, as we both started walking towards the school.
“Oh my god, I can’t believe you haven’t heard about it. Everyone is talking about it right now at school, here have a look!” She responded showing me her phone.
As I grabbed her cell phone I began to read what was on the screen. My eyes grew wide with shock from the words I was reading. The whole world seemed to have stopped moving in that very moment for me, I felt my heart drop for a split second and felt my hands beginning to shake uncontrollably with fright.
It was all of the five girls that bullied me yesterday including Priscilla. Their bodies were found in a ditch this morning decapitated as well as their hearts being cut out. They were...dead. Priscilla still remains missing, however, since her body has still not been found.
“What... the hell...” I voiced out with panic in my voice.