Chapter 31: Guilt
“Whenever you want me to, Luna,” Danny said with amusement in his voice, I could already see the image of his stupid face smirking.
“Just pick me up two hours from now, I’ll text you the address later,” I said to him with an annoyed sigh.
“Okay, I’ll see you tonight then.”
He said shortly after before hanging up, holding the phone against my ear still...I couldn’t believe that I was gonna go through with this. I could feel my hands shaking a bit with fright and worriedness about my decision. There’s no going back though, I have to do this. I need to know what happened, I have so many questions that have to be answered...
“Elijah, please...come back to me. I miss you...so much.”
I said to myself as I placed the phone down on my bed, holding on to my stomach the fear of being pregnant began to overcome me with fear as I slowly began to cry. Is it so wrong of me, hoping that I am pregnant, even a little? I know I’m not in the right state of mind to have a child, I know I’m far too young...but this is the only attachment I have left of Eli if I am with child.
“Luna! Dinner is ready!”
I heard my mother calling out from the kitchen, quickly wiping away my tears. I approached the mirror in my room to make sure my makeup wasn’t ruined. But as I looked at myself in the reflection...I saw a girl who I couldn’t recognize. Who is this fragile person that looks so easy to break, is it me?
Gently placing my fingers against the glass, I tried to look deeper inside. Trying to find any kind of strength I had left in me, to stop myself from going insane. I’m afraid of being alone, I’m scared of never being able to see Eli again. It terrifies me...how pathetic of me.
“I don’t want to break...I wanna be strong. Not just for myself...but for the people I love.”
I quietly spoke before leaving the room, making my way to the kitchen. I saw that my mother had already eaten her dinner...
“Where’s Dad? Is he not gonna eat?”
I asked while taking a seat and began to eat my food...
“He already ate earlier, and what time are you going to Alexa’s house?”
“About two hours from now,” I replied as I tried to finish my food quickly.
“Oh, okay then. Do you need me to take you to her house?”
Mother kindly offered in a tender smile, though it pierced my heart with heavy guilt.
“No thanks...I’ma get picked up instead,” I responded as I tried to avoid her stare.
“Well that’s good, It gives me more time to take care of your father.”
She said with a little laughter in her voice, however, I could see the tiredness in my mother’s eyes. I know she’s been stressed and tired lately, she’s been so busy taking care of me and now she’s having to take care of my dad. She really doesn’t have any time for herself these days, I really need to repay them somehow? They’ve done so much for me...
“Well, I hope you have a fun time over there. Tell Alexa I said hi and make sure you girls behave.”
Mother said in a stern response before getting up from the table...
“Okay...I’ll behave,” I answered in a bittersweet smile as I looked down at my ring.
After I was done eating dinner, I took the time to dress into something simple before texting Danny my address. I want to look as plain as possible, the less attention the better. Especially since I’m having Danny picking me up in a few minutes, I don’t want him to do anything weird. I’ll make sure I have my guard up tonight, no matter what! Soon the ringing of my phone suddenly went off! Excepting it to be Danny, I didn’t bother to look at the caller ID as I answered.
“Luna! Are you fucking kidding me! Tell me it’s a joke and that you’re not going to that stupid party right now!”
Hearing his sudden yelling, I instantly pulled my phone away from my ear! I didn’t even need to look at the caller I.D. Just by the sound of his voice, I could easily tell that it was Ren.
“What are you talking about?”
I responded trying to sound clueless about what he was asking of me...
“Don’t fucking play dumb right now! I called Alexa earlier to see if you’re doing okay, and she sounded very weird on the phone. She was also avoiding my questions when I was asking her about the party tonight, so I know you’re there!”
He raised his voice more in anger...
“What, are you my fucken stalker now!? I’m not even at the party yet!”
I voiced out with annoyance as I tilted my head back with frustration...
“What do you mean not yet? Luna! Don’t you dare fucking go, you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into!”
He said with a strict tone as I gripped the phone more tightly...
“You know what Ren! You’re not my Mom, you’re not my Father, and you’re sure as hell, not Elijah! I’m going to that party tonight...and Danny is taking me. So I don’t care what you have to say!”
Immediately cutting off the call, I refused to listen to whatever he had to say. He has no right to tell me what to do with my life! But just as I was about to throw my phone across the bed, I got a sudden text from Danny! Without even opening his message, I looked right out the window and saw that he had up pulled up next to my house! Quickly grabbing my bag, I stuffed my phone in my pocket before heading out!
“Mom, I’m leaving,” I said to her as I hurried out the door!
“Alright, do you have everything you need?”
She asked as she watched me opened the door...
“Yes, I have everything in my bag. I’ll see you tomorrow...”
I responded with troubled doubt, I really wish I was going to a simple sleepover. What misfortune I have...
“I love you, call me if you need anything.”
“I love you too...”
I said in a guilty sigh before leaving the house, once I shut the door behind me. I saw that Danny was in his car waiting. Slowly making my way towards his vehicle, I was starting to feel on edge. Opening the passenger side of his car, I sat myself down and kept myself quiet. Though I could feel his stare growing tense as he kept looking at me...
“You’re a brave little girl, Luna,” Danny said with a smirk.
“Just take me to the party,” I responded coldly while avoiding his gaze.
“Whatever you say, you know...you’re kinda cute when you act tough.”
He said with a flirtatious tone as he began to drive off. For the rest of the car ride, Danny didn’t speak to me, though I would feel his eyes looking at me from time to time. Trying my best to ignore him, I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction that he was intimidating. Squeezing my bag tightly, I kept looking forward not wanting to coward in fear. Perhaps I’m still shaken up by what Danny told me this morning at the lockers, he looked so scary and I truly believed that he was going to hit me...
Suddenly, the sound of the radio could be heard playing! At least he broke this awkward silence between us. I’m just glad we don’t have to talk to one another, I just wish this car ride didn’t feel so long. Nevertheless, I felt utter relief when I noticed we were finally approaching Luke’s house. My tensed shoulders dropped and I felt a bit more relaxed, however, once Danny was done parking the car he suddenly faced his body towards me! He began to lean his body closer toward my direction! My body went back to feeling tense as I panicked with fright! Is he going to hurt me? Is he still mad at what happened in school today?
“What are you doing?!”
I asked in fear as I saw the scar on his lips, the many bruises across his face were very visible as he closed the gap between us! What’s worse is that Danny wasn’t responding to what I was asking!
“Stay away from me!”
I yelled at him, only this time I tried to sound more upset than afraid! Though he completely ignored me as he reached out his hand, instinctively closing my eyes. I held my bag tightly against my chest as I waited for his hand to touch me! Though nothing happened as all I heard was a clicking noise and something opening! Reopening my eyes, I saw that Danny had opened the glove compartment and was searching for something...
“You overact too much, you’re not my type. I prefer easy girls that don’t complain all the time...but if you’re ever horny. I could always fix that for you...”
Danny explained with a sneer as he pulled out a box of condoms from the compartment! Watching him shove them in his jacket, I almost gagged at his proposal as he stepped out of the car.
“Don’t flatter yourself, you’re a disgusting pig that gets a rise out of hurting others,” I said to him with annoyance as I got out of the car. He really is a fuck boy just like Alexa mentioned...
“You should really watch how you talk to me, or else...I won’t be responsible for what happens to you tonight,” He said with a dangerous smile.
“Is that suppose to be a threat?”
I asked him as we both approached the front door of the house...
“You can take it however you want, I’m just saying that you’re gonna regret fucking with me,” He replied with a hateful stare...
“Aren’t you gonna answer that?”
He asked as we both heard my phone going off!
Opening the front door, he blended himself within the crowd until I could no longer see him. So once he was out of sight, I pulled out my phone to see that it was Ren who was calling me! What the hell does he want now?
“You know, you’re really starting to get on my nerves,” I said feeling frustrated as I made my way through the thick crowd of people surrounding me.
“Luna, I’m on my way to pick you up.”
He casually said as I came to a full stop!
“What?! No, why are you coming here? I didn’t ask you to come! And I’m not going back home, just stay out of my business-”
“I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
He said nonchalantly as he hunged up the phone shortly after! Is he being serious right now?! How much more stubborn and stupid can he get!? It’s like nothing I say gets through to him at all! I swear... I don’t know who’s more stubborn at this point? Ren or Elijah... wait! Why am I even comparing them, they’re both completely different from one another?
I wonder if I will see him tonight? The chances are slim, but there has to be someone here that knows what happened to him. It’s just going to be difficult to talk with people with this loud music playing in the background, even the heavy scent of marijuana could be smelled filling the room! This place really isn’t my atmosphere, but I will go through anything if it means finding him...