Chapter 60: Present Time
*Flashback Dream 13 Years Ago, Caught Up To The Prologue *
“Mommy! Daddy! Where are you!”
That’s right, I remember why I hate being so alone, why I fear the dark so much. I was only 7 years old back then...
I was shouting out for my parents when I got lost near the lake, all I could do was cry and hope someone could find me. But how will someone see me when I’m so small and what was worse was that night time was quickly approaching. I shouldn’t have ran off on my own so carelessly, but I really wanted to play in the sand and make some sandcastles. All I could do was keep walking down the lake bed, my little feet were beginning to get tired. But I couldn’t stop, I had to keep going and find my parents. Or else.....I don’t know what might happen to me.
My sobs grew louder and my fear began to grow. The splashing of waves hitting against each other mixed with my cries was going to be difficult for anybody to hear me at this point. That was until I looked straight ahead to see a tree with not that many leaves on it. Fall was already here so it’s no wonder all I mostly saw we’re just branches, the wind was also starting to become cold as I watched the sun finally disappear and the moon slowly rise. I couldn’t stop my tears from falling as I was completely alone in the dark and unaware of my surroundings, I could feel my little heart beating at such an alarming rate that I felt like falling on the ground and cry in a panic. I was so afraid, what if my parents don’t care to look for me, what if I never see them. What if I never get to play with Eli again...
“Can you stop crying already, it’s not gonna help solve your problems little one.”
“Huh? Wh...who said that?!” I cried out in fear.
I heard an older guy’s voice coming from the same direction as where the tree was. So I stood completely still, I was scared of who it could be! Was it a ghost?! I wasn’t a hundred percent sure who was talking to me, but my mommy said to stay away from strangers! So that’s what I intend on doing, however.....what if I stay lost forever and this is the only chance of getting help?
“Me? I’m no one....just a monster..”
The guy responded heavily as I could paint out his body frame leaning against the tree. I was cautious when I slowly began to approach him at this point. My life is already in danger with me being lost so what else can I do?
“A monster? You don’t look like a monster...”
I responded truthfully as I got closer, though I couldn’t help but sniffle as I tried to hold back my tears as I spoke. Rubbing my eyes, I looked at the man just sitting there as the wind began to pick up.
“You humans are so easily fooled.” He said sounding amused.
"Wha...what...are you talking about mister? And why are you here?” I stuttered underneath the chilling winds.
“It’s nothing child, and I could ask you the same thing. What is a little girl like yourself doing all alone here at night.”
I could feel my tears starting to fill up again as he asks me that question, I didn’t want to be reminded that I was still lost!
“Don’t start crying again, it’s annoying.”
“I...I...I can’t stop though...I just want to go home and see my mom and dad!” I yelled out at him as I sat on the floor, I was beginning to feel like I will be lost forever.
“Your mother and father...why do you wanna see them?”
“Well...be... because I miss them and love them-”
“Love...how can a child know what love is?”
I was confused by his question, and I wasn’t sure how I would answer that. But he was right, I don’t think I know what love feels like.....what is love? Is it when you miss someone when you care for someone? Unable to stop thinking about them? Always yearning to hold them?
“D...Do you know what love is?” I asked the strange man.
“I thought I did....but I’ve come to realize. That it never was love...just desperation.”
“What’s a desperation?” I asked confusedly, I never heard of such a word.
“Forget what I said, now tell me. How did you end up getting lost?”
He asked while standing himself up, he then began to walk towards my direction as I sat there unable to move. I’ve grown tired of walking for so long and I’m sure my little feet have gotten blisters by now. So I tried to wipe my tears away from my face until I saw the man more clearly in front of me. My eyes locked gaze of the color of his stare...
I spoke out in disbelief as he bends his body forward to look down at me.
“I know, their ugly-”
“They’re really pretty,” I responded truthfully as I cut him off admiring how beautiful his red eyes reflected so brightly once the moonlight shined on them. However, once I said those words, he looked at me so surprise as he opened his eyes wide to my reaction.
“Your... a very strange little girl.” The man said in a low chuckle as he continued to look at me carefully.
I questioned him unaware of how close we’re, I was so enchanted by his gaze that I couldn’t help but want to touch his face. He didn’t seem real, his skin was smooth and pale, yet he looked so sad...
“Don’t you find me.... hideous?” He asked of me as we both felt the wind passing by us.
“N...no....I think you’re very...special...I’ve never seen anyone like you before,” I responded to how I was feeling, he looks beautiful. Why would he think he looked so ugly? So I slowly got on my own two feet in stared directly at him.
" Never in my whole life, has anyone called me.... ‘special’....so to have a human girl say that it’s very strange.”
He explained as he suddenly leaned his body back to stand up straight. He then reached into his sweater pocket and pulled out a white flower, while still looking down at me. He hesitantly stretched out his hand while holding the flower in front of me.
I wasn’t sure what he was doing, but it looked like he was trying to give it to me. So I slowly raised out my hand and accepted the flower in hand. I was very careful about not dropping it as I looked at how white it was. Why did he have this flower in his pocket, to begin with? As I was asking myself that, I suddenly felt someone grabbing my hand and pulling me along with them. So I quickly looked up and saw that it was him... He was holding my hand as he kept walking silently.
“Umm...mister...where...where are you taking me?” I asked worriedly as I tried to tug my little hand free. I was terrified of where he might take me, but most of all...will I be okay if I go with him?
“Calm down child, I’m just helping you find your parents and nothing more.” He responded calmly as he loosened his grip on me. Hearing him say that, I felt very relieved and so incredibly happy!
“Really! You’ll really help me, mister!” I yelled out with excitement not noticing how tightly I was beginning to hold his hand.
"If I don’t help you, I’m sure all you’ll do is continue to cry. An that would be bothersome for me, because then I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my peaceful night.” He explained quietly while keeping his steady stare straight forward.
We kept walking hand in hand for a while without saying a word, but that was fine by me. Because as strange as it might seem, I felt safe with having him by my side...
“Huh? Why did you stop?” I asked the man once he stopped walking.
“Those humans over there, they’re calling out a name...Luna.” He responded hesitantly as he immediately let go of my hand.
“Hey, that’s my name! Who said that? I can’t see or hear anybody with how dark it is right now and the water splashing against each other makes it hard for me to hear?!” I asked him excitedly as I began to look around desperately!
“Just keep running straight from here, and I’m sure you’ll find what you’re looking for.”
He suggested, he then gave me a light little push from my back. So I did what he said and ran as fast as my little feet can carry me, and the more I ran, the more I could hear my name being called out!
“Mommy!! Daddy!” I yelled out in tears once I was able to make out where they were at.
“Oh my god! Luna! Where were you! We were worried sick!” My mother sobbed out once she saw me shouting out towards them.
“Don’t you ever go running off like that again! Do you understand!”
My father shouted angrily with worry, he then picked me up and held me tightly like it would be his last. I couldn’t help but cry as I snuggled up to my father’s arms while still holding on to the white flower in hand.
“I’m sorry.....I just really wanted to make some sandcastles-”
“Luna, where did you get this rose?” My mother interrupted me as she took the white flower away from me.
“It’s a rose? An...he gave it to me.”
I answered as I pointed behind me. However, once I turned my head around, there was no one there but darkness.
“He? What was his name? What did he look like?” My father asked worriedly as he began to walk us back to the car.
“His name....” Now that I think about it, I never asked what his name was. But I do know one thing!
“He had red eyes! And he was pretty too.” I responded truthfully as I looked up at the moon shining bright on us.
“Sweetie, there’s no person in the world who has red eyes.” My mother said while holding my hand.
“I know what I saw though...he helped me find you guys and-"
“Luna!” I heard a boy yell out my name with fright and worry.
“Eli?” I questioned myself as I turned my head to see a boy running up to me and my dad.
“Luna are you okay! I was looking everywhere for you, you know!” Eli yelled out angrily once he got closer. My father then set me down and I could see Elijah’s mom coming from behind him.
“Oh thank goodness you found her, I was beginning to worry. And little Eli here was crying non stop searching for her.” Miss Red explained as she looked at me relieved.
“N...no I wasn’t crying, mom! I...I just had dirt in my eyes!” Eli shouted back as he looked away from me, I wasn’t sure if I saw this right but I could have sworn I saw his ears turn slightly red.
“Anyways, let’s all go back home.” My mother voiced out as we walked towards the parking lot.
“Here...” Eli said to me as he stuck out his hand.
“What are you doing?” I asked looking confused as I stared at his hand.
“Give me your hand idiot, that way you don’t get lost again!”
Eli yelled with embarrassment as he grabbed my hand swiftly. It felt nice holding his hand, even though he could be a bully sometimes. His hand felt nice and warm, however, that man’s hand I was holding earlier felt cold and lonely for some reason...
“I wonder what his name was.”
“What you say?” Eli asked while looking at me strangely.
“Huh...oh it’s nothing...”
I responded quietly, I do hope I see him again one day though, after all. I never got the chance to thank him for helping me find my parents and for giving me his white rose. I wonder who he was...
Suddenly a person with red eyes flashed through my mind until I woke myself up in a panic! I could feel my heartbeat heavily along with my rough breathing. Placing my hand on my chest, I tried to calm myself down.
“The same dream again...”
I said to myself quietly as I tugged the sheets closer to me. It was the same dream I’ve been having for the last month already, and I just can’t recognize who he is? With the frustration of my dreams waking me, I didn’t even realize when I fell asleep. I guess I dozed off when I was laying on Eli’s chest in the morning, I did have a lot on my mind I guess when I was drifting off to sleep...
So I immediately look to my left side of the bed and saw that Elijah was no longer laying next to me. It still hurts waking up every time knowing that I’m alone after being so close to Eli a few hours ago. As I continued to lay in bed, I placed my hand on the space that he was at. An felt how cold the sheets were, so I knew that Elijah probably left me right after I went to sleep...
“Eli...I’m sorry...but I can’t do this... anymore...”
I cried out in sadness as I gripped onto the sheets tightly! My heart could no longer handle this emotional abuse of love and hatred! It’s like I’m fighting with two different people inside of me! My heart tells me to stay, but my mind tells me to leave. After everything that has happened already, there’s still so much that I left out. I want Elijah to change for the better, although he finally agreed to let me leave this room after a whole month of isolation. It took so much out of me to convince him! I had to throw away my pride and what I believed in, just so Elijah can trust me again.
As I tried to sit upright, the sharp pain that I had before came back again! It was like daggers jabbing at my lower abdomen and there was no end to it! Maybe I should have had Carla heal me, but I would have been too uncomfortable with having her look at my naked body. Also, I didn’t think that I would be in this much pain after waking up. Looking out the window in discomfort, I saw that night time has already fallen. I guess I slept through the whole day...It continued to snow since the morning as I looked at the frost covering the windows. Not too long after, the light melody that I would always hear every night would start to play so sweetly until sunrise, and I knew that it was Felix again...
“You like that melody, don’t you, Felix,” I whispered to myself as I got off from the bed.
With the blanket still wrapped around my naked body, I slowly began to make my way towards the window doors. I remember the first time waking up in Eli’s room, I heard him play this melody. I wonder if this song is important to him?
Placing my hand on the glass, I couldn’t help but cry as I listened carefully to every key he pressed on that piano of his. The pain that I was in was too much for me to withstand, I could no longer stand on my own two feet. My lower waist still felt numb from letting Eli do what he wanted with my body. I gave everything I had, to Elijah.... hoping that he’ll see how much agony I’m still in. Coming down to my knees, I sat myself down and leaned my head against the glass door. I was no longer able to open these doors since Elijah cast a spell on all the knobs that prevented me from opening them. So I couldn’t leave this place, nor can anyone but Elijah himself can come in.
Staring out at the balcony, I looked down and saw how white the garden has become. A sheet of snow had covered everything, just like the first time when I came here. Just how long have I truly been down here? Is this how I’ll live my life from now on? To live in this world and suffer a love that I can’t forgive? To let Eli take my body however he pleases and have me wait here for him every single day? With my mind growing darker, the melody could no longer be heard as I closed my eyes to escape the reality that I was in...
“Is this the life you want, Luna?” I heard someone speak to me, it was a voice that I haven’t heard in a very long time.
Opening my eyes slowly, I looked out the window and saw those familiar Red eyes staring back at me. Red eyes, just like in my dream...
I voiced out weakly as I placed my hand on the glass frame. With my eyes still crying pools of tears, I saw the sadness that Felix had on me when he crouched himself down to my eye level to look at me more closely. It’s been so long since I last saw him, along with Crow as well. In fact, the last time we spoke, was when he held me in arms.
“Don’t look at me like that, the last thing I want is for a demon to feel sorry for me.” I worded out to him with grief.
“Luna, you know what I’m feeling because of you. With everything that has happened to you since day one, I know how broken you feel because of what my brother has done. I truly wish things could have been different between us, but my blood flows inside you. I can’t change that unless you want it to.” He explained with sorrow in his voice as he placed his hand on the window frame as well.
“Why....why didn’t you just let me die that day? Why did you have to give me more of your blood? None of this would be happening right now if you just-”
“I couldn’t let you die, I don’t know why....and it terrifies me not knowing what these emotions are doing to me and my body. All I know is that I can’t stop thinking about you...I don’t know what it means...but I feel it has something to do with the blood bond that we now share...Luna, I apologize for making your life more difficult. I hope that you’ll forgive me..."
“None of this is your fault...I just.....I don’t know what I want anymore...I feel trap and I have nothing left to give. My family...my friends...Ren..and my unborn child...I no longer exist in their lives anymore....so what’s the point in staying alive when everyone I loved is practically gone...”
“I’m sorry Luna...I know you say that it’s not my fault. But I can’t help but feel like I’m still to blame for the loss of everyone you cared about. An as horrible as this may sound, you still have Elijah who truly does love you, and I know that deep down in your heart...you still love him.”
He said to me calmly, I then averted his stare and looked down at my hand. The ring that I’ve always worn, the gift that Elijah gave me shined so brightly now. It’s been so long since I last saw it shine so strongly like this...
“A few weeks ago, before Eli went out of control...Crow once told me long ago, that there are two paths that one must choose. The path to be with the one you love, or the path to be with the one you're meant to be with. Your soulmate, an I ask myself. Is Elijah the one that I’m truly meant to be with...or is he the one that I just love....” I choked out my words in sadness while gripping my hands into a tight fist.
Felix voiced out my name in heartbreak as he watched me drown myself deeper into darkness. Silence came upon us and all that could be heard was my muffled cries that I couldn’t stop shedding. As time went by, I watched as Felix stood himself up and he seemed like he was in deep thought by how serious his gaze was.
“If it’s too painful to stay here....would you like it, if I set you free.”
My heartfelt like it stopped beating for a second as I quickly looked up at Felix! Did he just say that to me!? Is he not afraid of what Elijah might do to him if he finds out about this?!
“Felix...I...You know I can’t just leave...he’ll find me. He’ll just bring me back, not only that...but..but he’ll kill you-”
“I won’t give him the chance.....Luna, if you say yes right now. I’ll break this enchanted glass and take you far away from here...but know that once we leave. We can never come back.”
Felix explained with such seriousness in his voice that it was almost frightening. But what mainly scared me was running away from here and always having the fear of Eli looking for me. I don’t wanna live in fear....but I also don’t wanna live my life like a butterfly locked away in a cage and unable to do what I want and always being tied down by Eli.....
“Even...even If I wanted to run away...I can’t....not with how my body is right now.”
I said to him as I covered my body more with the sheets. The many markings on my body that Elijah has left on me will one day fade away, but the marking that he has left on my heart will always be permanent. I was too weak and too exhausted to move, so how can I run away from this place? Where can I even go? Backing myself away from the window, I felt a cold chill run up my spine.
“I’ll give you my blood.”
“Huh! N...no? I won’t let you do that again! I...I..can't always rely on you helping me-”
“It’s the only thing that I can do, to help you heal faster... and this might be the only time I can help you. I heard your thoughts, Luna, do you believe that Elijah...will truly let you leave this room. That he’ll keep his word, after what you’ve done already? He doesn’t trust you, and who knows when he will. Luna, pick the right path for yourself...and tell me....what you want.” He spoke out strongly as I watched him back away from the glass.
An as much as I hate to admit it, I know that he was right. I broke my promise first to Eli...so I know there’s no trust between us right now...and it’s just like Felix said. Who knows when he’ll fully trust me again...I hate how he can read my mind so clearly and feel what my emotions are. But in some sick twisted way, I’m happy that Felix can. Because at least, there’s someone in this world that understands me with what I’m going through. But I don’t think I’m mentally and emotionally strong enough to keep ongoing-
“Remember what you told me long ago, Luna.” Felix suddenly asked me while I was deep in my thoughts.
“You said, that you’ll try and stay strong for as long as you can. Because you don’t wanna forget who you are.” He said to me as he placed his palm on the glass.
That’s right! I did tell him that, but that was before Elijah was making me lose my mind for him. For these last few days, weeks...Eli would make love to me...hold me for hours until I pass out. An when I wake up, I’ll be alone again for a while until he comes back to the room and takes my body all over again. My mind, body, and soul were all he wanted, yet I refused to give him my full heart because I was afraid that he will break it again. And that’s when I knew...I wasn’t ready to give Elijah my heart yet. I don’t know if I ever will be...
“Please...take me away from here,” I whispered as I felt my body tremble with worry. Because I knew, that there was no going back from this.
“Of course,” Felix responded relieved, he then looked at the glass and I watched in fright as his eyes grew black just like Elijah’s.
His palm that he had laid to rest on the glass frame suddenly felt strong, as he suddenly began to say some words that I couldn’t understand. But as he finished chanting his spell, I watched the glass crack into a million small pieces. It looked like snow almost with how it fell so lightly to the ground!
As I sat there in amazement, I didn’t realize that Felix had pulled out a dagger from his pocket! He then began to walk towards me as he held the blade in hand. Just what does he plan on doing with that!? But before I could even speak, Felix had already cut his palm and began sucking the blood that was coming from his hand. He then wasted no time in coming down to his knees in pulled me close to him, he then held me in place and grabbed my jaw.
Cutting me off in what I was trying to say, I felt a pair of cold wet lips touching mine. My eyes grew wide with disbelief and I couldn’t push him away with the little energy I had left in me. All I could do was just lay there and take his blood again. The look on Felix’s face was warm and touching, it was as if he was trying to speak to me with his eyes...that everything will be okay. An not be afraid anymore. I guess he knew that I wasn’t going to take his blood so easily, so the only option he had left was to force it down my throat like this. This wasn’t the first time that we have kissed, but I wonder why I feel so strange when we connect like this?An just like that, the blood bond between Felix and I only grew stronger. Yet my heart continues to beat so heavy for Elijah...I wish that things could have been different when I first met Eli years ago. Feeling the blood pass down my throat, I felt a drop escape my mouth as Felix pulled his lips away from me. He then wrapped his arms around me and peered through my eyes with such sorrow. My vision soon became dark, an all that I could feel was Felix's arms holding me tightly. I soon felt the cool frost of snow hitting my skin and the last thing I was able to hear was his voice yelling out my name...
Eli...I’m sorry...that I couldn’t keep my promise...
End of Book One