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Best Friends Don't Sleep Together

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Raking a hand through his hair, I sighed. "I love you, you know" I mumbled in a sigh, eyes half closed. "I've always loved you and I always will", I remarked, gently caressing his hair. He didn't move, actually, he seemed soothed by the movements of my hand over his scalp. "And I might sound arrogant, but while I really do wish you the best, I also know that, no matter what, whoever it is that'll gain your heart, she will never love you like I do. Because no one can". Closing my eyes, I dropped my head back and sighed. Even breathing hurts, but I can't do else. It's the only way I can be close to him. It's the only way I can have him in my life. Even while hurting so badly.

Romance / Drama
Artemis Watson
4.1 61 reviews
Age Rating:

Chapter 1

“You can close your eyes from the things you don’t want to see,but you can’t close your heart from the things you don’t want to feel.” - Johnny Depp


Raking a hand through his hair, I sighed. “I love you, you know.” I mumbled in a sigh, eyes half closed.

“I’ve always loved you and I always will.” I remarked, gently caressing his hair. He didn’t move, actually, he seemed soothed by the movements of my hand over his scalp.

“And I might sound arrogant, but while I really do wish you the best, I also know that, no matter what, whoever it is that’ll gain your heart, she will never love you like I do. Because no one can.” Closing my eyes, I dropped my head back and sighed. Even breathing hurts, but I can’t do else. It’s the only way I can be close to him. It’s the only way I can have him in my life. Even while hurting so badly.

When I woke up, I felt sore. And not in a pleasant way ... of course, I’d been sleeping seated, back against the headboard. That’s not really good for my bones.

Looking down on my lap, I noticed Chris was still there, deeply asleep. When he popped up at my doorframe yesterday, with such a distraught look on his handsome face, my heart dropped and without even asking for explanations, I pulled him in and gave him my special cheer-up treatment, the one I’ve been giving him since years every time he came to me all gloomy.

Whatever the cause, I always had my remedy ready for him. Just like a good best friend does, right? Problems for me started when the reason for his gloomy mood became girls.

The thing is, Chris is handsome, and hot and sexy and girls want him, but ... unlike so many other guys with good looks, he has a truly bleeding heart, gets easily fond of people and when they hurt him or betray him, he feels lost.

I’ve lost the count of the times I’ve told him to be more careful, but in the end, he is like that, trusts people without really thinking it over and I like that, especially because it’s opposite to me.

He’s tried being one of those one-night-stands boys, but never succeeded, not because he ended up calling the girl, but because he then felt guilty for not doing it. He simply isn’t made for that. He’s the kind of guy that will give you his whole heart if he thinks you’re worth it, but it’s up to you not to spoil the occasion.

And so many girls have ... it’s like this is the exact opposite to the usual, where normally it’s boys who use girls, but in this case it’s girls who exchange my poor Snuggy Bear for a gigolo. Not that he is always innocent, I mean, he has broken hearts, many of them, but there have been times when it was him to be hurt and every time, I was right there for him.

What’s changed now is that my feelings have been tormenting me since forever and at his point, it hurts more than I could ever explain with words. He doesn’t know, just ... doesn’t know that his best friend feels broken because of him. But the thing is, while I am broken without him, then when we’re together it’s all perfect, because he’s the best friend I could ever have and even while it’s painful to just be that for him, there’s no way I could ever imagine a life without him.

Now, yesterday, he didn’t tell me anything about why was he so hurt, but I have the fair feeling that it’s about a girl. It’s always a girl. It’s like they see him handsome and sexy and they think he’s the usual jerk, but he isn’t, he gets his heart broken more than due and I hate that.

I have faced a few of his girls, you know. Because I just couldn’t see him like that and ... they all said the same: the problem is not him, the problem is me ... he’s too attached to me and they feel like, and that’s hilarious, they feel like I’m competition. A competition they feel like they can never win because I’m his best friend and, as those girls said, sooner or later best friends take that path. Whether they want it or not.

Well, I would have so loved to reply that if it had been for me, Chris and I would have taken that path so many years ago, but he doesn’t look at me like that. I’m like a sister to him, because we’ve grown up together, basically, to each other, we’re siblings. I’m only child while Chris has an older sister that’s about to get married, and an older brother that’s always traveling around the world.

Now, since both Meredith and Adam are older, poor Chris was left playing alone, he’s the puppy of the family and so loved, but his siblings had their things already, so when my family moved in that I was 5, our mothers, who were friends already, were always together, so Chris and I found ourselves always together as well and we stuck to each other because we liked it. Our mothers were so happy about it, they never even argued about anything we did together.

Neither did our fathers. I mean, while my dad would have freaked out about any boy entering my bedroom, even if only for studying purposes, when I was in high school, he was perfectly ok with Chris and I sleeping together in the same bed even during our hormonally frenzy teenage years. Because each of our parents took for granted that we were like brother and sister and there was no way we could ever make that kind of mistake.

My father used to wake me up every morning for school, and at least four times out of seven he would find me snuggled up to Chris, but ... he never said one word about it. Because my best friend and I had been sleeping together so many times since childhood that really, it was perfectly normal. And my father knew he could trust Chris blindly.

Those other three times when my father wouldn’t find us in my bed, it was Chris’ mother to find me and her son all wrapped up in each other, deeply asleep, or, either he would come fetch me to drive us to school, but more often I would go fetch that sleepyhead not to be late.

He’s a real sleepyhead, not that I’m a morning person, but Chris ... when he falls asleep, he would sleep for ages. So every morning, when we didn’t sleep together, I would go to his place and wake him up. Funny how the thing is different now ... it’s him to wake me up in the early morning. Oh, our apartments are across each other, so it’s not rare that we also fall asleep on each other’s couch or why not, bed.

I remember two years ago, my ex dropped by to bring me breakfast before going to work, and ... oh, he was so mad when he found me snuggled up to Chris! I kept explaining that we’re best friends and we’re really used to it, even Chris assured him that it was perfectly normal for us to fall asleep wrapped up in each other without doing absolutely anything, but ... well, the boy didn’t want to believe it, said he always thought Chris was a threat to our relationship because I’m too attached to him.

Funny, huh? We’re both single because we’re both a threat to each other’s relationships according to our ex’s. I am too attached to him, he is too attached to me. Laura, my other best friend, says he’s too dependent on me and vice versa. I tell her we’ve grown up together, we’re just so used to having each other in our lives that we just can’t see an alternative. Well, I can’t. But I’m sure that neither does he.

When I felt Chris move, I smiled, caressing his hair soothingly, like I know he likes, and he hummed in his sleep, clearly pleased. He was resting only his head on my lap, the rest of the body was sprawled on my bed. You must be wondering, how is this angel she seems to value so much?

Well, my lovely Chris really does have all the features of an angel: sandy blonde hair, deep green eyes, perfectly masculine face but softened by his adorable smile. I won’t describe the rest because ... well, it’s not really wise for me to remember how damn hot and sexy my best friend is, but just know that he works out, he’s a sportsman, but doesn’t overdo, I mean, he’s lean in his muscularity. Like ... a soccer player, or something of the sort. Lately, he’s been keeping this beard that gives him a quite ragged look that makes him even sexier. And I’m not the only one to notice, because girls are even more around him lately.

Luckily, it was Saturday, so we could spend the day the together, as I was already figuring. Yes, I know, only last night I said that even breathing hurts by now, but the thing is, and that’s one thing that keeps me anchored to my doom, it hurts even more without him.

I am just so used to his presence, he’s like the other half of me, or better, a complementary part of me, like ... an extension. We’re inseparable, our parents says. So bond to each other that when we both said we’d move to New York, neither of them was surprised, actually, what took them off guard was that we wouldn’t be living in the same apartment. Just that.

In reality, we did plan on living together, but then I found this cozy apartment where I’d live with two other girls and while even if in theory boys weren’t allowed, I knew my roommates, once they’d seen my best friend, wouldn’t have argued, I didn’t want him to fall for one of them, so I used the excuse of the owner not wanting boys and girls to live both under the same roof.

Chris obviously found an apartment near mine, though, so what I wanted to avoid, happened anyway ... I’ll spare you the details about how tough it was for me when my only love not only dated my roommate, but also kept telling me about her, like a lovesick fool would. And I had to listen to her babbling about him too, so imagine my state in that period ...

Then, it all went out of the window and I actually don’t know why. Chris just told me they broke up and since I couldn’t face Karen again and I’d be forced not to have my best friend come over because of that, I just decided I’d move in. Chris suggested I’d move in his apartment, so we’d live together, and I almost accepted, but the truth is, I wanted to go far from Karen. Both because I knew Chris was hurt, because he’d truly fallen for her, and because I didn’t want them to have a fallback. Selfish, I know. Especially because I knew that if I moved in far from there, Chris would follow me.

And he did, so since then we’ve been living across from each other, both alone. And we’re just fine like this. Even though my mother says that we could just spare some money and split the rent.

Seeing Chris was half asleep, even though his eyes were still closed, I lightly tugged on his temple, gaining a light groan, as I spoke: “Hey, Boo ... wanna let me get up so I can go make us breakfast?”

Of course, he only grumbled sleepy nonsense, which made me chuckle, because he looked just cuter like that. I know I’m biased, but he’s adorable, truly adorable. I pressed my index finger on his temple again.“Come on ... I’m gonna make you blueberry pancakes. Your favorites.”

He growled and my smile widened. “It’s Saturday.” He grumbled in his sexy husky but groggy and hoarse voice, and I giggled, pinching his cheek. “Yes, but we gotta have breakfast before it becomes lunch.”

“We’ll have brunch.” He bargained. I rolled my eyes, although secretly smiling.

“Come on ... what’s better? An unhealthy brunch or a very yummy breakfast?” I asked, raking a hand through his hair. No response. Duh, this boy is so stubborn sometimes ... “Come on, you just have to let me get up, then you can go back sleeping ...”

In response, he simply wrapped his arms around my legs, so that I was blocked. “That’s childish.” I snorted. He snickered, confirming my idea.

“This pillow is too cozy to let it go.” He commented and I kind of blushed, but in the end, I am used to him calling me his favorite pillow, because, believe me, this is not even nearly the first time we sleep in this position.

We split, I mean, half of the times I do the pillow for him, the other half he does that for me. Seriously, we’re so used to being in each other’s arms like brother and sister that sometimes I even wonder how comes that I just find him so sexy and would so gladly have more, much more of him.

“Yes, but the pillow might shift into a good cook if you let her ...” He snickered a little but then replied: “Nah, pillow better.” He used his childish voice that, for what he knows, gets on my nerves, but in truth, makes him only so, so much more adorable. Like ... teddy bear adorable.

Well, he is my Snuggy Bear and I love cuddling to him. I have been since always. Also because he’s a touchy person, so he hugs and cuddles and everything, and since we were always together, I was his most favorite victim. Like I still am. You have no idea how my heart flutters when he just comes up, kisses my cheek and hugs me tightly.

I knew how to get him to move, though ... when I reached his sides and started tickling him, he started tossing and turning, complaining that I was cruel and unfair, because I know how ticklish he is, but I just laughed and in the end ... he moved, only to pin me down on bed, his left knee in between my legs, his hands tightly gripping my wrists.

I forced myself to smile innocently when his green eyes fixed on my browns, even though my heart was racing like a fool and I just had the most incredible urge for him to just bend down a little and claim those lips that have always been his and his only, even if he never knew.

Noticing that his green grass eyes darkened a little and twinkled didn’t really help, just made my heartbeat increase to a dangerous pace. I had to smack my romantic self over the head when she suggested that if his eyes were darkening like that, he was seriously thinking of ... kissing me. He wasn’t, I knew he wasn’t, because he just doesn’t see me like a possible flame. I’m simply his little sister. Literally too, because Chris is actually one year older than I.

I’ll spare you how dramatic it were for me the last months of my junior year as I kept thinking of how would he leave me alone for a whole year after that and who knew, he might find his soul mate and forget me ...

At times, I’ve felt guilty, because when we talked about that, I irrationally burst out crying, confessing I was afraid to lose him, because one thing is our little hometown, another is a big city, and there are so many distractions and he’d be busy, so I’d soon be out of his mind and it hurt me, because really I didn’t want to lose him ... in every sense, I acted truly childishly. Chris, having the truly heart of gold he has, promised to stall for one year and wait for me to graduate, so that we could begin college together. And we did, in very different environments, but same college.

Now ... Chris was still staring at me, his face molded into a very serious expression and I swallowed, really feeling like fainting, especially when he bent down a little.

But in the end, he grinned. “You’re too lucky I love you, so I can’t punish you.” I smiled at his statement, even if my heart ached at the awareness that he didn’t mean it the way I did ... he meant he loves me like a sister, like he’s told me more than once.

I bit my tongue not to reply. I think I’ve never told him that, possibly, the most I’ve come to tell him is that I care for him, nothing else. Because I’ve been loving him in a very different way from a brother since I can remember and when/if I tell him, I want it to be true and in that only sense.

Duh ... like I’ll ever even have the guts to tell him. It’d spoil our friendship and that would only destroy me, because he means really everything to me.

“Then let me go.” I mumbled, trying hard not to give away what I truly had inside. Chris smirked mischievously. “Have to make you pay for that, Missy.” I rolled my eyes at that.

“What this time? Cleaning your car? You know I won’t do your laundry.” He grinned. “Why not? I’m a very decent guy.”

“Duh, I wouldn’t touch your underwear for anything in the world.” He laughed, making the sound resonate in my ears and butterflies flutter in my stomach. Damn butterflies, I’m gonna need the spray.

“Ok, ok, how about ... you clean up my apartment?” I snorted at that. “Only for tickling you? No chance, sir.”

“You know I’m very ticklish.”

“Not my problem, sir.” I stuck out my tongue to him and he gave me one of his toothy grins that melt my heart, so ... that was time to move, before doing something very stupid like ... leaning in and kissing him. On the lips, that is.

I left him there, a bit puzzled, and stood up. I would have liked to be wearing some skimpy shorts and tank top that would have had him, despite everything, check me out hungrily, but no ... I was wearing my pink plaid flannel pajama that my grandma bought me when I moved to New York five years ago for college. My hair was even a complete mess, so yeah ... so sexy I looked ...

Chris instead, when he stood up, he straightened up his t-shirt and jeans but he looked hot anyway. No matter what. Before I could be caught drooling over him while staring, I got out of my bedroom and quickly reached the kitchen to make breakfast.

Meanwhile I could hear the shower being switched on, clear sign Chris had opted for showering at my place, again. Seriously, mom is right. We could just spare some money and live together because that’s actually what we do in reality. But the thing is, I am afraid I’d be seeing his girls and ... thanks, but ... no, thanks. It’s already enough tough like this.

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