Need Of Love
Every passing second felt like hours. I stood there with my jaw clenched, waiting for a response from her.
Then, suddenly, it happened.
Her silence was replaced by a sob and a soft murmur of a ‘yes’. Her head bobbed up and down furiously. Her heartfelt reaction made a huge grin spread across Dane’s face.
He stood up and walked towards Kiara.
He held her hand and gently placed the ring on her finger. With the ring on its place, Kiara threw her arms around Dane’s neck and started sobbing.
And with that, the whole cafeteria broke out into cheers, grins lighting up their faces.
I felt a sense of gratification which brought a genuine smile upon my lips. The heavy guilt upon my shoulders finally lightened.
It felt good.
It felt good to know that I fixed what I’ve broken.
I cleared up my mess.
No, it didn’t change the fact that I let my anger get the best of me or the fact that I almost ruined the relationship between two people.
But, it did change the fact that I was the cause of their love dying or the fact that I was the cause of them drifting apart.
So, I was satisfied with myself.
The newly engaged couple stood up. They were still in each other’s arms, looking like they had no intention of letting go. But, nobody looked like they minded as they walked ahead to offer their regards and share their joy.
And, then I felt the all too familiar feeling of not belonging. I didn’t mind feeling cause I never really belonged, but, this time it was different.
I felt lonely.
Looking at the laughing couple, smiling and accepting all those love-filled blessings to have a bright and happy future, I realized I didn’t have that.
I didn’t have someone to hold and neither did I have the promise or blessing of a lit-up future. I didn’t have anyone to stand by me if I fell and neither did I have someone to look at and smile when I rose.
In honesty, I didn’t have anyone.
I haven’t felt this voidness and loneliness for so long that I thought I finally got rid of it. I thought I became strong enough to finally be able to block all of it.
Sighing, I looked at the exit and then back at the couple. At the sight of their burning happiness, I realized that my job was done and I was not needed here anymore.
So, I walked towards the door, ready to reach my empty home before I lost my composure.
Before I lost the image I built of myself.
The corridor was dark with almost all the light switched off. After all, the working hours were over.
When I almost reached the elevator, I felt a hand on my arm, stopping me.
“Where are you going?” Pierce’s voice made me shut my eyes and clench my teeth. I wasn’t at the state for this.
“Ivy?” his voice was somehow, softer.
“Can you just let go. I-” I sucked in a breath, “I just want to go home.”
His ocean eyes softened. “I can take you there. That would be faster and you are not in a state to drive.”
“I am fine. Besides, are you going to bring me to my office tomorrow too? I need my car” I snapped.
He smiled his Cupid-like smile. “Yes. I will.”
He didn’t wait for any other response.
Suddenly, his hand was on my waist and I was pulled against his lean frame. On instinct, I shut my eyes.
The tingling feeling crept into my skin and then it was all gone.
“We are here” He gently whispered into my ears. I opened my eyes and noticed that I was in my room.
I didn’t want to step away from his warmth-filled arms but I still did.
The sudden loss of heat was too overbearing, so I hugged myself, trying to stop the growing void and losing heat.
“I should leave now. I will see you tomorrow, Ivy” he said and I didn’t know why but my heart spoke without the consent of my brain.
“When will I find my fated?” my voice wasn’t the usual monotone and sarcasm laced with anger, but small and hopeless.
“I just- I can’t take it anymore” my voice broke and so did I.
I broke down in front of him and the tears started pouring like rain.
Within seconds, his arms were around me, again, and my head was tucked in his chest.
And I cried harder.
For the first in 18 years, someone held me when the weight on my shoulders got too much.
I don’t know how long I stood there, in his arms. But, I stood there till my sobs got muted and only tears poured. I stood even when my tears dried up and I tried and failed to get a hold of myself.
But, I didn’t let go of him. I just couldn’t.
“You don’t need someone fated for you to feel complete. To feel loved, Ivy.”
“I need someone, Pierce. You said you know souls. Can’t to see mine? I need some warmth” I whispered
“And I will help you find it. I will help you find it within yourself. Not in someone else. Just give me a chance.”
“Trying to act like the Cupid you are, Huh?” I chuckled, my throat dry and husky.
“I am not joking, Ivy. Just think about-”
“Okay,” I whispered.
I am sorry for being gone this long. But, I am back now and I promise to update within every two to three days.