Heal My Heart

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Chapter 8

My dancing competition was over and my mom pulled our family to celebrate. Not that Tania – she had also participated – or I had won – though I did get second place. She just said she had something important to tell us and she will when we leave.

Which I’m not sure how she is going to do since she invited Carly and Stacey because they were my friends and Delia and Shauwn, they happen to be Tania’s friends. Then she even invited Cam and Leo and Mina when they came to congratulate me, for getting second place. Then Tania wanted to ask Darcy to come with us as well. So Darcy and her guy joined us as well, some guy from the team, named Damson.

I pointed out to her that she couldn’t drive everyone in her car and Cam and Shauwn volunteered to drive as well.

And that is how all of us ended up in this fancy restaurant, where we were having dinner. Everyone was talking of something and it was such a clatter.

It was half-way through the meal that my phone buzzed. When I checked I had a notification from facebook.

NATE ANDREWS COMMENTED ON YOUR PHOTO.

I raised my eyebrow at my phone. Nate was a good and great friend. He went to Nick’s high school from before we moved. He used to be close friend with Nick. That is how I met him, but I was also very close with Nate. I also used to date Nate’s best buddy, Mark.

*Shake head*. Okay I’m not going to think of that now.

Anyway, when we moved I lost touch with him completely. This was strange a little. Though I did sing in to FB and look his commented out of curiosity.

LOOKING AS CUTE AS EVER. BUT WHY IS MY LITTLE ANGEL CRYING??? L

He had commented on the pic that Nick took on the first day we moved in. the one where I was crying and pouting at the same time. I hadn’t singed into FB and there were a lot of new pics in here. Mostly from my brother, who had updated every embarrassing thing I had done he could capture. There were a few from Leo as well, all tagged.

I shook my head at that too and went to Nate’s comment. I laughed re-reading it. It was just like Nate to just casually ask something like that. I replied to him.

JUST WAS ANGRY AT FOLKS FOR MOVING… :D

AND I WAS MISSING SABER, DEARLY…L STILL AM.

“Nick, guess who just commented on my photo?” I asked once I was done commenting. Nick gave me a clueless look and I handed him the phone. I had taken Nick by surprise, but his reaction when he read it was the same as mine.

“Well…” Nick started and trailed off as if not sure what to tell. “I guess he is the only one to not get snapped at with a comment such as that” he said carefully picking his words and making sure to not mention my ex. He knew how I felt about it all. Just a big fat mess, but it doesn’t hurt any less knowing he was only just playing with me.

“He even got a proper reply from you” Nick stated when I didn’t say anything in reply to him.

“Your right,” I agreed with him. “He is the only one who’d ask anything like that as casually, as he did. So he’d be the only one.”

AW… THAT’S CUTE ;D

YOU PHOTO TOO

I got two replies from Nate and I read it out loud to Nick, very aware of the fact that everyone at our table was listening in to our conversation. But since it was not that private I didn’t care. I had to talk loud, because I and Nick were sitting on opposite ends of the table.

THANKX, BUT YOU DO KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE TO GET A PROPER REPLY FROM ME WITH A QUESTION LIKE THAT… RIGHT???

I replied to Nate and when Nick asked I said it out loud to him as well. Even my mom was listening in. but I couldn’t care less. “Typical” Nick said when I read my reply out loud, and pulled his phone out, signing in to FB. How I knew this? Because shortly after a Typical appeared on my comment from him.

ACTUALLY I DO.

Nate replied and I laughed, now that I didn’t have to tell everything to Nick our table was quiet.

Before either me or Nick could reply another comment appeared. I read:

SO WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS??? LOST CONTACT FOR WAY TOO LONG… LLL

This simple question lost me. I had no idea how to answer that. I mean the last time I saw Nate we both were kinda pissed at each other and we had not made up for it – which was solely his fault, because he wouldn’t answer any of my texts or calls and kept on ignoring me.

Now I had no idea where I stood with him. I didn’t even get to tell him a proper goodbye when we left, thankx to him still ignoring me. He had tried to make me stay and not leave, but I had no other choice but to leave. What with all the heartache I was having after my breakup with his friend.

Its funny how I used to think I couldn’t live without Mark and now I didn’t even like to hear his name mentioned. Well I still get hurt at the mention of his name not so much that I don’t like to hear it. But I’d rather not hear it than remember all the great things we used to do…

My brother anyhow beat me to replying. He had been quick to give all the details from street name, state to address. They must be in good terms then. Seeing as how quick he was to give our address. He hadn’t even thought twice before replying.

I looked at Nick startled when I read his reply and he looked at me with a look in his eyes that asked is-something-wrong?

“So who is this guy you two are talking about?” my mom asked breaking the silence that fell when me and Nick started using the phone and not yelling out the comments. I and Nick looked at each other wondering how to reply to that. My mom was definitely not a fan of Nate, mostly because of Mark.

“No one” I said at the same time my brother went “her guy.”

I glared at my brother. Nate was so not my guy. I didn’t like him that way and he doesn’t either. Were just good friends – though I have no idea whether I could introduce him that way anymore.

My mom looked at the two of us amused waiting for us to come to a conclusion.

“He is so not my boyfriend. I mean my guy.” I said in a hard tone to Nick glaring at him through slit eyes. “Oh please, you are so totally in love with the guy” Nick scoffed glaring at me as well.

I chocked on the piece of food I accidently swallowed when he said that. Carly tapped my back and I yelled “Am not” when I was able to breath again.

“Are too”

“Am not”

“Are too”

“Am not”

“Are too”

“Enough, both of you.” Mom called. She knew better than anyone that the two of us would go with it for hours and not get tired of it, since both of us don’t give up.

“What make you even think that?” I asked Nick completely ignoring mom. Though she did roll her eyes and shake her head going back to her food.

“You didn’t see your face when you said Na- he commented on your photo” Nick said accidently, almost letting on who we were speaking of. Mom looked at Nick with a suspicious look then at me but she didn’t tell anything, thankfully.

“I was happy, just happy. He ismy friend no matter what you think” I said, my voice just bellow a yell.

“You two, we are in a restaurant. Behave please” mom said in a stern voice and both of us just glared at each other not saying anything else. Now that the two of us fell silent I couldn’t help thinking of my relationship with Mark and how exactly Nate had helped me with it, which would be a lot.

Thinking of it more would only make me cry I knew that, but now that we had been talking of it my mind couldn’t think of anything better to distract me. Feeling that I wanted sometime alone to get my feelings straight I excused myself and half ran half walked to the washroom.

I pulled my phone out planning on talking to someone when, with a pang I realized everyone I could talk to was already here in the restaurant. Perfect, just what I want right now (sense the scarsm).

I didn’t return to the table immediately, I hung my head over the sink taking long deep breaths. I had to keep it together only unlit we leave I said to myself, reassuringly – though it did nothing to help. I just wanted to forget the last few minutes, even if it was for a few seconds, but seeing as how that won’t be a possibility I might as well go out and pretend nothing is wrong like I always do.

I was just about to sit in my chair when Nick pulled me from the elbow and dragged me out. I’m sure that looked a scene to see. He stopped when we were standing a little ways away from the entrance to the restaurant and turned to face me.

I looked at him with a crooked eyebrow and cocking my head to the side for effect. I have to say though, outside felt nicer and much cooler than inside. Sure there was and air-conditioner, but I always had loved natural wind and outside was very windy, making my hair dance and smack on my face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked me and I looked at the traffic without uttering a word. He must have seen that I was upset or at least felt it. Nick knew me too well for me to cover anything from him. I heard him groan frustrated, when I gave him no reply.

“Wanna talk?” he asked now sounding more concerned than frustrated. I turned back to him and closing my eyes I looked up still not uttering a word.

I felt a warm hand on mine and I looked down and saw it was only Nick’s hand. I looked up at his face and he had a warm smile on his face, a smile that was only reserved for me. His made me smile a small smile. “I… don’t know where I stand with him anymore Nick.” I finally said in a small voice. “I don’t know how he thinks of me anymore and I couldn’t help remembering how we left things and it was not so great”

His hand that wasn’t holding my hand ran through my hair making me close my eyes again and lean into his touch. I loved it when he did that, I just felt like heaven. It always made my mind go blank and it was a great feeling and it was something I really needed right now. I was sub-consciously leaning in to his touch, with a blissful feeling.

I heard him chuckle, but only heard it because when he runs his hand through my hair nothing registers in my mind. “You’d do anything if someone stroked your hair won’t you?” he asked me still chuckling. “Mm…” I said agreeing with him still in a blissful state.

Suddenly he pulled his hand away and I leaned against his hand and bumped on his chest making my eye fly open. I have to stop doing that! Or one of these days I’m gonna find myself in trouble. But I did throw a pouty look at Nick. Mostly because I like it with my mind gone blank, it was a perfect feeling.

“We should probably go in” he stated making me pout even more and my face fell.

“I don’t wanna go just yet” I whined stomping my feet like a small child. I stopped storming my feet and looked at Nick through my bangs before asking “Have you forgiven him?”

He had an irritated look when I looked at him but at my question he threw me a sharp look. “What is that supposed to mean?” he demanded but it was answer enough for me. He had no idea what happened between me and Nate. He didn’t know of the way the two of us fought.

I muttered a small ‘oh’ looking down at the concrete side-walk. Since he didn’t know I didn’t want to tell him. Unfortunately for me anyway I will have to, now that mentioned it he wouldn’t let go of it easily.

I looked back up at him and he was looking at me like he was trying to figure me out, for a person who already knew me inside out, it was saying a lot.

“Let’s go in” I said with fake enthusiasm and a bright smile, which I know he saw through. Before he could stop me I walked in to the restaurant, swiftly and quickly. Footsteps behind me told me Nick was following me but he didn’t say anything.

The rest of the evening went okay, I kept up my façade and Nick didn’t talk to me at all. That was a bit disturbing, but since I was occupied talking to Carly and Stacey I didn’t notice it much. Cam or Leo’d occasionally comment on something or pull me to there conversation, but nothing embarrassing happened.

It was as we were leaving the restaurant that mom’ phone rang, it was a big deal so I ignored it as we waited for her to hang-up so we could go home. It was when she kept the phone that hell broke loose. She said she had to leave in an emergency, a job emergency and she wouldn’t be back until tomorrow.

“Mom you run a flower shop” I pointed out to her, what sort of emergency could a person running a flower shop have that would keep them out all night? You tell me, something was fishy.

“Oh, no sweetheart I found a new job” my mom replied not realizing what she said.

“When did you find a new job?” Tania scoffed in a demanding way. She pretends to not care, because she was our step-mom but she did care. We all did grow up with mom after all, though only I call her mom (beside Dustin, but he is her son unlike the rest of us). Tania and Nick just call her Mary.

All of us hated our real mother and with a passion. She left us when we were very little to marry some rich business dude and ignored us for most of our lives. It was with Mary, mom that we grew up with. Our real mother had missed out so much in our lives to actually be able to forgive her.

But on the day we did meet her when she finally wanted to be with us again – two years ago- Tania changed. She wanted to be with our real mother and she started hating mom telling herself that she was the reason we couldn’t be a family again. But Tania didn’t hate mom as much as she claims to.

“Yeah” I agreed with Tania. “Is this why you are rarely ever at home. Ever since th...” I trailed off knowing now why she worked double time now. It was for me.

My face fell and I looked down when I realized why she had to work so hard. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Nick and mom look at each other startled-ly. Mom gave Nick a meaningful asking for help but he was just as lost on what to do as she was.

“Oh sweetie,” mom started cupping my cheek in her soft hand. “It’s okay, I’m not having a hard time.” She said making me look up. I was biting my lip to keep myself from bawling out. I was already in a bad mood and this was only making it hard to keep it together. “Keep biting your lip any more hard and your going to bleed” she said laughing trying to lift the mood.

But that was the last straw. My lips trembled slightly before I threw myself at her, still trying to keep even single tear from escaping. She hugged me and patted my back saying “it’s all fine honey, it’ll be.”

Finally I let her go when Nick patted my shoulder as well. He wrapped his arm around my waist and I let my hair fall on my face covering the tears that were threatening to fall. “We’ll talk once you get home” I said to her in a cracked voice, I felt Nick flinch at how cracked my voice was.

“Sure sweetie” mom said patting my cheek once again before getting into the car. But before she droved away she asked Nick to make sure we all got home safe.

Once she drove away Cam walked up to Nick asking whether we wanted a lift home. “Sydney?” Nick asked uncertainly. I was still hunched over with his arms still around me. If he let go I would fall since I was leaning on him for support.

I straightened when he said my name, but before I could reply Tania butt in chiming “we’d love to Cam, thankx so much.” Then she shot me a look that said you better not say no. Ignoring her I looked up at Nick twisting around to face him. “I don’t wanna go home” I mumbled.

Nick raised an eyebrow asking where then? Tania scoffed in a oh-please way and Cam’s reaction I couldn’t see because he was behind me. Then an idea hit me and I gleamed up at my brother and squirmed out of his arms facing all three of them.

“Well… do you mind driving us some place other than home?” I questioned Cam. Who was also looking at me the same way Nick was. Which happened to be questioning.

“Drive you where exactly?” Cam asked me curiously.

“A place” I shrugged in a carefree way. Cam looked at Nick for help, but Nick was just as lost as Cam was. I didn’t plan on telling Nick until we got there because if he knew he’d never agree to go otherwise. So it’ll have to wait. “Well…” I asked Cam expectantly.

“How can I drive you when I don’t know to where?” he questioned with a tone that said he thought I was a little out of my mind. I smiled at him and in a sweet voice went “if you accept I’ll tell.” I was merry again, the incident few minutes ago forgotten, for a little while. I know it’ll come back soon.

“Fine whatever” Cam said waving it off and rolling his eyes. Nick gave him what can I do? Sarcastic look.

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