Words seemed to escape her or maybe came out the wrong way. At nineteen, there is no clue she is not ready. Things are fine until Mark says, “Trenda, I really want this to be something.
You know?” Trenda didn’t know. Trenda is scared but he did everything. Mark sees her with another guy; he holds on. He brings a girl to her home. ‘Come driving up the parking lot, introducing her;
Acting like he thinks that girl is going to be Trenda’s best friend but that girl sees the sparkle in his eyes is her. She hears the familiar tones in their voices when two people bond. Mark never retreats and how come it doesn’t register with Trenda? How come she doesn’t perceive the tender words they keep; preserved in a flawless gold box just for them?
On a cool summer night the front door is open. Trenda and Mark linger on his mother’s old century couch. The lights are low. The light of the moon is coming through the screen. They kiss. She takes his kiss and molds his lips with hers.
Marks lips are full, firm and blousy, three times bigger than hers. She loves them big and waiting. He said afterwards, “The next time we kiss I want have much lip left” and he smiles at her. Trenda doesn’t think anyone ever kisses him like that. She smiles slowly too at Mark saying that to her. The kiss tells her who Mark belongs to.
He doesn’t depart but she never realizes that fact until the last hour. She hears he is moving to his mother’s home state. Desperation began. Every day in her heart and mind, she scrambles for a plan. It needs to be her doing the chasing. There is a group outing. Trenda and Mark will pair up for the last time. Like old times.
She began thinking, “This is the perfect night. Maybe, this is my chance.” The night ages and they find themselves on the front steps. He leans in telling her good bye…for the last time.
Mark is so sweet and promising but it isn’t enough. Is it possible to get past the last year? When she ignores his advances after telling him, “We can still be friends?” She knows he is crushed. So is it she, not recognizing the haunting of her fears?
Frantically, she races to the phone the next day to call Ms. Anne, rehearsing apologies. Begging doesn’t hurt right now. Mark will forgive her for not knowing the child she is but the young lady she should be.
When Miss Anne answers the phone, she says, “Mark isn’t here.” She sounds a bit too delighted. Trenda knows she won’t tell him she called. Mark is letting go. These are Trenda’s tears from being released by him. She is going to beg Mark not to go but he won’t hear her. He did… everything.