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Ceiling Gazing

By InnerPaperCowboy All Rights Reserved ©

Romance / Other

"Ok."

"Fuck," I lean back on my pillow, grab my pack, fish a cigarette and my lighter out. "This shit is getting old, man, I'm not even surprised anymore." That gratifying snap of the flint wheel as I press down. "Every night, every god forsaken night," The flame takes as I breath in heat and smoke. "All I ask is one night!" My exclamation falls around my head just as listlessly as the dust coming off of the rafters. I exhale.


Let me explain. This is a story of nihilism, degradation, and worlds separated by wood beams. My life five months prior to writing this was innocuous. Passed by with the same excitement as the drive to work that you've made daily for twenty-two years, wait, that's too uneventful. Maybe it's a little more like having your teeth cleaned, that may be more apt. You knew when it was happening, showed up, had someone painfully jab at your gums while you tried to mumble polite conversation past the awkward amount of foreign objects being shoved into your face, lied about flossing, made another appointment and showed no actual attempt to have the next one go any better. Yeah, that'll do much better.

Now, in those twenty-two years, I'd fallen into one of the cracks of society that so many of my generation do. These being filled with ennui, vices, and mediocrity. How could I not after following same path as nearly everyone else. Graduated, moved out, went to college, started working at a medial job and trying to finding something to stave off tedium when Netflix didn't have any good suggestions and you'd already binge-watched all of your favorites. I've found that bourbon helped immensely for me.

I actually took it in stride even if I might frame it darkly, I fit the role of the forgotten quite well. My ancestry being best described as mutt. My features are a hodge-podge of western European hum-drummery, dark blonde hair in a trendy, short cut and a pretty adequate "dad bod." I was happy to just fade into the background of where ever I was, a seat filler, a quite life. My job, a 24/7 Laundry mat, also was perfect trimming to the bland feast of my early adult hood. Countless days spent, slightly hung-over, listening to the constant pwush-cachunk-pwush coming out from the walls of beaten, pea soup green washing machines. The soft tumble and buzz of dryers finishing up their tasks. That unique thunk as the customers pushed the coins into the machines' innards and inadvertently my paycheck. I would often lose myself for hours listening to my mechanical colleagues in between smoke breaks and the occasion of customer interaction.

My life was metered out in cigarettes and loads of wash. I was ok.


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Tinkerbelle Leonhardt: I'm such a sucker for this story, yes there are small spelling mistakes normal human errors, nothing major. you fall in love with the characters and wish to be apart of their lives from the start. You feel their happiness, their sadness and I found myself smiling through most of it, I love that i...

Starryeyedreader: This story is fantastic! I enjoyed reading this from beginning to the end!

Sabrina_F: Amazing story. Love good, thoughtful "bad boys"! Those are rare to come by in life!! Can't wait to read Jake's story now!!!

Nashy.: I think the story and plot overall is really great. Though, her updates throughout the story are very time consuming.

Sinn: The story overall is short and sweet with a little something extra to spice it up. This made me cry and laugh and it really touched my heart. It was a bit too short for my liking but an overall great story that I definitely recommend.

Thenicia Roberts: I've always found simple straightforward romances to be rather enjoyable 😊. Great work!

Katie Drake: got started on wattpad and came here to get the story faster lol but now i still have to wait but i will

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alice: the main characters are super relatable and charming. they have a realistic reaction to the troubles they face in life and nothing is too overdramatized which is a refreshing change from other books that are similar to this plotline, that I have read. I would definitely recommend this book to any...

Marianne Mareda: Love all the books. Please keep updating.

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Harshna Haswaani: The story had its own beautiful line. The problem loes with grammar and character development. There was a constant change between 1st person's point of view and third person's point of view. Personalities of characters can be more defined

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