Once again I stood outside Caleb's doorstep with my bags, it felt like deja vu all over again.
I didn't need to say anything for him to understand, He stepped out and pulled me into a hug before taking my bag and welcoming me inside.
I settled on the couch and he went to get me a drink,
"So what now?" He returned with a bottle, settling next to me, "
"I don't know, I haven't figured it out yet." I said, taking the bottle from him. "I'm not going back to the firm either, I'm done with that." I only liked working at the firm because of Karl, I wanted so badly to compete with Jenna, to please him, I thought he wouldn't want to go from a highly educated woman to a babysitter/bartender, that didn't even matter at the end, "Kay offered me a spot at the club, as partner."
"Karl's brother.." I muttered and he gave me a look, "And, I know how that sounds, but I loved working at the bar."
"Del, no one is against you working at the bar, it's who you are working with that's the issue, you can't forget Karl if you keep seeing his brother every day...."
"There's a 10 to no chance of me running into Karl..."
"I still think you should reconsider, it's not your best idea."
"Besides It's either that, or I go back home and listen to a daily I told you so...."
"You are free to stay here as long as you want, I'm not complaining, your room is just as you left, I had a feeling you would come to your senses."
I chuckled, bombing his shoulder playfully,
"You're welcome, shower and rest, I have to get to the store, do you need anything?"
"No, I'm just going to lay down and rest."
I got up and dragged my bag into the room.
Caleb left soon after.
I placed my bags at the corner and took a look around the room before throwing myself on the bed with a huff.
"Well, now what?" I was back to square one, no job, no cash or even a place to lay my head.
"So what have you guys decided?" The counselors asked. Each of us doesn't say anything right way, I stared at Karl and Karl stared at me,
"Do you still want this?"
I gulped, muttering.
"Honestly, I feel we've been striving back and forth to make this work, with no result. Before now, we were in this enclosed bubble, surrounded by the anticipation and fear of getting caught, there was so much intimacy, and then we could confide on each other about everything and anything, now I don't even know where we are as a couple."
"Karl, do you have anything to add to what Delilah just said?"
"I honestly don't know why she feels that way, or even what lies ahead for us. I'm aware of what my actions might seem like in this case, to cause her to think like this. But I adore Delilah, she's become my entire world, I can't leave without this woman, I'm nothing without her, and contrary to what she might think, I didn't set out to love her because I was fed up with my marriage or because of some bubble, but only because I love her and I want to be with her."
"Well, It doesn't seem like it lately, you haven't said two words since you found I slept with someone else."
"I'm trying here...."
"That's not how I see it, Karl...I see you backing away, you can't even look at me."
"Delilah, I wouldn't be here if I didn't want this to work, but I also don't need the added worry that the woman I love would run off when things get harder, which they would."
"You are such a hypocrite... A few months ago you were going to dump me for your ex-wife, how is this any different?
"I didn't sleep with her." He blurted and I gasped.
He laughed mockingly, "Now we are cursing..."
"I can't believe you said that to me."
"You are so indecisive, I'm tired of you acting like a child--" I screamed at him,
"Why won't you make up your mind?"
"I don't know what---"
"Guys!" The counselor yelled louder, catching our attention,
We both cleared our throat and sat properly, I was beyond pained by his words.
"As a counselor working with couples for so many years, especially ones juggling out of illicit affairs, most of the time the other partner, let's say Karl in this case, they find it hard adapting to the change, they are indecisive, comparing their lives now and then, regretting, wondering if they made a mistake, it's overwhelming. At least that's how I see it. In the other case, let's say, Delilah. They feel insecure, constantly trying to make things right, just to meet the expectation of their partner. I honestly think you two need some time apart, you need to figure out what you want for yourselves before being with each other, try and use the time apart to figure out what you want... Like I always tell my clients, if it's meant to be, it will be, it is that easy."