Forbidden and Desired.

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Chapter 5


I sat across the small dimly lit table from the devilishly handsome Chase and all I could think about was the last dinner I shared with Blake. It was in a dimly lit Italian Restaurant. It was such a romantic evening.

"Would you like something to drink?"

"Sorry , what was that?" I say blushing at the thought that I never heard a thing Chase just asked me.

"Would you like something to drink my precious, you looked miles away for a minute there?"

"Uhm sure yes I will have a glass of red wine please, dry red" I answer still blushing at being caught with my head in the clouds.

Once our drinks arrived and the first few sips were behind us I looked over at Chase that could not stop staring at me. I was starting to feel slightly uncomfortable now. A thin sheen of sweat was forming on his brow.

"Alright Chase, you got me here for dinner, the one dinner I am allowing you so start talking, I am all ears" I say trying to sound calmer than the turmoil that is tumbling around inside me. I don't know If I pulled it off because all Chase does is sigh.

"Impatient are we,"he says shaking his head.

"Look Chase, I came here looking for an explanation." I snap before I could even process a decent response.

"Shit Gabby, I know, I know you have waited almost five years for this" he says running his hand through his hair.

"I just don't know where to start or if I am even ready to say it out loud. How can I start explaining to you, how badly I fucked up" Chase responds anxiously. I can feel the waves of terror flowing off him.

I pick up my black clutch as if to stand and walk away, when Chase suddenly reaches over and grabs ahold of my hand.

"Please don't, just sit okay my precious, please don't go. I will tell you, everything." He says. His eyes are glassy, as if he is trying to fight back the tears, that are threatening to spill.

My anxiety levels have just shot through the roof. Here I am sitting patiently knowing that I am not going to like what ever he was going to say but waited anxiously for him to start.

Chase takes a deep breath. .......

"Remember that football camp I went on like five and half years ago, well we weren't the only ones on that camp, there were cheerleaders there aswell, well one night a bunch of us guys were drinking. You need to realise, I was very drunk Gabby. Anyways I ended up fucking some cheerleader. We hooked up through the duration of the camp and when it was time to leave we exchanged numbers. I told her all about you, but she just didn't care.

When I returned, that's when I started becoming distant towards you, the guilt was eating me up inside and I didn't want to hurt you anymore than I already knew I had. Three months after that Claire phoned me to let me know she was pregnant." Chase stopped to take a sip of his drink. He looked over at me to see if I was okay.

My jaw was slack and I was battling to fight back my tears. My heart literally felt like it was being ripped from my chest. I needed my resolve back I needed my strength but it was all gone.

Chase took a deep breath and continued.

"It was then that I knew what had to be done. I spoke to Blake that night and I told him everything. He was understanding but boy was he pissed at me for being so fucking stupid. We devised a plan and made a pact that he would be there for you the day I left. He also promised me that he would never bring it up again, to you or anyone else. I knew this would crush you but he promised me he would take care of you. He loved you too and I knew it. I used that to my benifit as much as for yours" he looked over at me and tears were silently falling down my face.

"Knowing you were being taken care of and that Blake was with you just made the decision to leave all that much easier, again I am so sorry, if there was something I could do to change it, but I am so sorry for hurting you" He reached over to take hold of my hand and I let him.

"So what happened then. Where is your wife and child, oh my God, you have a wife and a child?" I stuttered out between soft sobs of unbelief.

"No my precious, not exactly but also yes. I have a daughter, Claire never wanted to keep the baby but I convinced her otherwise but the day Gabrielle....." I cut him off with shock etched in my voice and clearly on my face.

"You named your daughter Gabrielle?" I spat with all the hurt radiating off of me.

"I did, she is my world" he says proudly without skipping a beat. "The day Claire delivered, she just disappeared. She up and left the hospital and I have been taking care of my little precious ever since, on my own."

Now that just freaked me the fuck out he named her after me and he calls her my precious my sentiment what the fuck.

I feel for him I really do, none of this could've been easy on him, then he is raising his daughter on his own aswell.

I feel the walls closing in on me. I am battling to breath. Then everything goes black.

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