There are quite a lot of people in the café at the moment, that’s a good thing for me. More people - more tips. I don’t like to work until late because in the last working hours there are all sorts of freaks and harassers here. I can’t stand how they look at my ass or chest and discuss it. We must wear sleek short shorts and a t-shirt. The boss says it attracts customers, but I think he just likes this image. It’s not the first time any of us have seen his gaze. Fucking perv.
“Hello, what would you like to order?” I’ll ask you to come to the table where the woman and her little daughter sit. “Hello, we would like two portions of pancakes with caramel syrup and one serving of vanilla ice cream.” The woman says smiling, giving me a menu, I quickly write down and return to the kitchen to pass the order.
Time passed quickly, I got one hour of work left. Ignoring who was sitting at the table, I confidently stepped towards them. When I reached the table, I raised my eyes from my notepad and was going to ask what I wanted to order when I suddenly stagnated. The same new guys were sitting at my table. What a happy day, pay attention to sarcasm...
“Hello, what would you like to order?” I asked, trying to remain as professional as possible. Feeling the gaze of all of them, my face began to heat up. It’s just amazing... “Oh, you’re the one... What the hell?!” I think Luke is starting to say, but is interrupted by Dominyko. I wonder what he wanted to say..
“I want a hamburger with fries and a chocolate milkshake.” Luca said looking at my face when I looked at it, noticed that the gaze is pointing at the place where my mother hit me. When he feels my gaze, he raises his eyes and our eyes meet. Looking at his eyes closer, watching her extraordinary, her blue-like deep ocean, I am imprisoned with his gaze. Freeing me from his sight, I turn all my attention back to his friends, they are still arguing about food... “Have you already made up your mind?” I’ll ask you hoping I can get away from Luca’s sight as soon as possible.
“I want a pork rib with mashed potatoes and a vanilla milk shake.” Dominic says by closing the menu. “I can’t decide.” Luke pouts. “I would suggest our four cheeses pizza, it’s very tasty.” I make my offer, I hope he won’t be offended, but looking into his eyes, I realized that I chose the right dish. “Yes, it sounds very tasty.” I write down all their orders and, in a quick step, I go to hand over to the order chef.
I asked Olivia to take their drinks to them because wherever I went I felt Luca’s gaze. When I looked, I met his curious gaze as if he were trying to understand me. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I want his attention. I feel so pathetic.
At the end of my shift, I went to change clothes and said goodbye to my colleagues. I chose the main exit, hoping to see Luca for the last time. But to my disappointment their table was empty, they went out.
When I left, I noticed it was dark outside. It’s good that I was already in the store.
On the way home, I prayed that there was no one at home, but when I got there, I noticed that all the lights were on. That means she’s not alone, she must have brought some miserable man to our house. Every man who comes back with her is the same as her, a drug addict, an alcoholic.
Now I stand in front of my house and once again rethink my options, whether to go inside or turn around and get out of here. It’s quite late and a school night, nor do I want to bother Anna and Lisa. Fuck. I breathe fresh air, accumulate all the courage I have and I step toward the door. I hesitate for a few minutes, but with no choice, I open the door wide.
The first thing I see when I walk through the door is a man kissing my mother. They sit cozyly on the couch, surrounded by empty bottles of beer around them, this image makes me disgust. Not wanting to draw their attention to me, I quickly step into the kitchen so that I can put all the food in the refrigerator. But before I open the fridge door, I feel like someone’s standing behind me. I feel fear overwhelming my whole body, my heart begins to beat uncontrollably in my chest.
“Where are you going, little girl?” he says, whispering in my ear, at this moment I just want to vomit. Does he really think he is sexy?
“Get away from me.” I try to keep a strong voice, but it comes out like a whisper.
“Where are you so urgent? We could have fun together.” He says and I feel like he puts his dirty hands on my hips and slowly rises up to my shirt.
“Don’t touch me!” I’m going to call and push him away from myself with all my strength. Fortunately, he’s drunk, because if it were otherwise, I don’t think I would have been able to do it. But my mother heard all the noise in my misfortune.
“What the hell is going on here?” She asks while sipping her drink. Mom comes toward us and with a free hand wraps around that man’s torso, kisses his neck. “Your daughter is very disrespectful, I just politely asked her for a cup of water, but she started to beat me.” He says he knows exactly that she’ll believe every word he says. And I feel that all this will not end in good time, at least for me.
“I’m tired of you, you’re a ungratefull bitch. I gave you life, home, what else do you want?! I had to get rid of you when I found out I was pregnant with you.” She says looking right in my eyes, I feel like tears are gathering in my eyes. In so many years I still haven’t got used to her cruel words, no matter how long it takes, it’s still going to hurt me to listen to it.
“I will teach you how to respect older people and guests.” She tells me and grabs an empty bottle, hits me in the head. I quickly cover my hands to avoid a blow and protect my face from injuries. But I feel pain in the back of my head and I fall to the ground. “Clean this mess and get out of my sight, fucking whore!” She shouts at me and turns away, grabs the man’s hand and takes him to the living room.
Without thinking, I slowly try to get up from the floor, suddenly everything starts to revolve around me. I’m going to put my back on the kitchen cabinet, trying to regain balance and try to get up a little bit. With my hand, I touch a place that hurts terribly, when I look at my fingers I see red blood, it makes me feel even worse.
I’ve been working on the kitchen from the last strength and I’m trying to get up the stairs to my room as soon as I can. As I climb the stairs, I hear their laughter, music and the pounding of empty bottles.
When I get in, I make sure the door is locked, and I’m going to put my chair under the door handle so no one can get in. Without any strength left, I collapse on my bed and let the darkness take me.