SevenConsciousness hit me in the face like a tonne of bricks, awakening me from a nightmare deemed horrifying by all accounts. Sweat-covered and disorientated, I searched my surroundings by extending my left arm and was met with nothing but silk sheets slipping over my skin, alarmingly so.
My enquiry was left unanswered, prompting me to leave the bed in search of my missing boyfriend. Maidenhead was peaceful by all accounts, meaning silence was no stranger to these parts. What was strange, however, was Spencer’s need to disappear in the middle of the night. Restlessness had become a familiar friend to us both as of late and the thought of him enduring yet another sleepless night alone worried me.
Sat, giving me the old stink eye at the top of the landing was Gatto-the-fucking great; Spencer and Leila’s very sly, very evil cat. The creature was anything but tame and held a deep vendetta against me. Why? I had no fucking idea. I had shown the thing nothing but compassion.
Rationality pushed thoughts of the devil-cat from my mind as I made my way downstairs, finding nothing out of the ordinary. It too, was blanketed in complete darkness. The doors were all locked and the grandfather clock Spencer had insisted on situating in the hallway was loudly ticking away into the early hours of Wednesday morning.
Yet again, my voice went unheard and as I drew closer to the living room door, I found his still figure lying on the sofa, earphones in. An audiobook played to him as he leisurely stretched; eyes closed as though deep in sleep, but I knew better than to believe it. His heavy breathing and twitching foot were both indicators of anxiety; an emotion he had mastered this past week.
“Hey you,” I soothed, gently resting my hand on his shoulder.
A sharp jerk startled him into sitting up, his blindness prompting a reaction in the form of panic. “It’s only me,” I ensured, caressing the creases from his forehead.
“Sorry.” He breathed, pulling the plugs on both ears. “Is everything okay?”
“I woke up and couldn’t find you,” I explained, taking huge comfort from his warmth. In my haste to find him, I had forgotten to grab my dressing gown. “I was worried.”
“Don’t be. I couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to disturb you,” he smiled, pulling my body on top of his. “Stephen King has been keeping me company,” he added, showing me a snippet of what I assumed was Carrie on his Kindle.
“You’re making good use out of your Christmas present then?” I smirked, dragging my lips along his roughened jaw.
I loved the texture of his gravel-like stubble and took great satisfaction whenever he grew it out, which wasn’t very often. Never one for possessing sloppy tendencies, he would always take a trip to his local barbers and have it shaved before it developed into a full blown beard.
“I love it almost as much as I love you.”
He’d had the device all of one week and was already half-way through his TBR list. Not that I blamed him. With just about every office in London closed for the holidays, Spencer had very little to do in the time it took for him to organise an emergency meeting with his lawyer. Christmas and the events of such a heart-breaking night still weighed heavy on our hearts, though with sunrise marking the second official day of the New Year, he was desperate to get the ball moving. We all were. Catherine and James had expressed on more than one occasion their desires to get the police involved, stating Alister’s actions as nothing less than kidnap. Spencer hadn’t wanted that and in the end, decided to go about things the way his lawyer had advised.
“I’m glad I take priority over your reading habits,” I smiled, pulling away.
The slight glow coming from the Kindle wasn’t enough to offer us a substantial income of light and wanting to change that, I attempted to move off and switch on the lamp. Unfortunately, Spencer had other ideas and practically moulded my body to his, unrelenting in his need to let go.
“Lie with me?”
At times, he didn’t need his sight. Very rarely did Spencer require the ability to actually see and I loved that most about him.
“Why don’t you come back to bed?” I suggested, stretching my long limbs next to his length.
“Because I won’t sleep. I know I won’t.”
“Are you nervous about tomorrow?” I asked, suspecting he was.
I grabbed the blanket he had draped over the back of the sofa and positioned the soft material over our bodies, snuggling further into his brilliant beast of a chest. The slight coating of golden hair he held on it tickled my cheek and rubbed against my bare shoulder, filling my mind with inappropriate thoughts.
“I am. What if I’m told I’m not fit enough to look after my own daughter?” he stressed, plunging his nose deep into the crevice of my neck.
There, he sniffed as though taking his next hit of cocaine and relaxed further into my embrace once the effects of my scent took over.
“They won’t,” I ensured, stroking his torso. “You’re biologically her father and the system will want you to play an active role in Leila’s life. It’s just a matter of proving Isy and Alister wrong,” I stated, squeezing hard on his bicep tattoo.
“I can’t lose her, Jess. I’ll die if they take her away for good.”
His bold statement robbed me of my breath, possibly forever. Thinking of him as anything other than happy and alive was simply not an option for me. He’d already been close to death’s door a few years ago and that was something I thought about a lot. I often wondered what it must’ve been like for him to endure such a scary thing alone. His wife (AKA, busy Isy) was off fornicating with another man and all he really had left to fight for was Leila. Take her out of the equation and he had no purpose, no will. Nothing.
“Please don’t talk like that,” I begged, thrusting my face into his chest in a last minute bid to hide my displeasure.
Before I could fight back against his unthinkable strength, his thick fingers grasped at my chin and pulled my face up to meet his. He was possibly the strongest man I knew and I hated seeing his resolve crumble before me.
“I’m sorry.” He sighed, resting his forehead to mine. “I didn’t mean that.”
“I just hate it when you slip into that mindset. I understand how tempting it must be but you can’t leave me, Spencer. You just can’t.”
“I won’t,” he promised, lowering his lips to mine. “I’m sorry, my love.”
“I’m worried my love isn’t enough,” I admitted, feeling the need to express such a thing.
He instantly shook his head. “You’re doing everything right, bellissima. You’re my perfect.”
Hearing him refer to me as such a thing had me immediately grabbing his cheeks and smashing my hungry lips to his. I needed assurance that after tomorrow, everything would be okay. I rarely lacked confidence but there was always that small chance everything we were fighting for would come crashing to the ground and I couldn’t let that happen. I couldn’t let myself think that way.
“I need you,” I stated, caressing each beautiful arm. “Sir...”
His features darkened and every muscle in his body stiffened in preparation. I knew what was expected of me, yet still felt the need to test him. Perhaps pushing him to his limits was what he most desired? Or maybe my judgement was clouded by what was potentially the most important meeting of our lives. I was to attend tomorrow’s hearing and with plans already set in motion, I had very little influence on the matter. As Spencer’s girlfriend, it was expected of me to show up and play an active role in the overall back and forth. Too bad Alister was to do the same. At best, I wanted to watch him fail. At worst, I’d like to kill the fucker myself!
“I refuse to satisfy you if your mind is elsewhere, topolina mia,” scorned Spencer, bringing me back to reality.
He was unimpressed and followed it through with a firm tug on my hair, prompting my neck to snap back in an instant. The action was unexpected but no less thrilling in its pursuit.
“Where is your head at, Jessica?”
“It’s here with you, sir,” I whispered, trembling with need.
He grunted his satisfaction and loosened his grip on my hair, caressing it gently thereafter. Within seconds, my pyjamas were fully removed, as were his lounge pants, leaving us both completely bare and indescribably aroused.
“How would my queen like it? Royally rough or vigorously vanilla?”
I laughed in response.
“Vigorously vanilla? Have you swallowed a dictionary?”
“Perhaps, now chose before I tie you up and gag you,” he threatened.
I thought for a moment, wanting more than ever his darker side but for obvious reasons, decided against it.
“I think it will look bad if I turn up to tomorrow’s meeting with evidence of our shared night together. So for that reason, your queen would like to be satisfied slowly but surely.”
“Yes, your highness,” he smirked, teasing me by circling my opening with one perfect finger.
I soon came to regret my decision for ‘slow’ and almost cried out in frustration when minutes had gone by and I still hadn’t received penetration. Not once did his finger dip further into my wet folds and instead, he focused his efforts on my aching clit, prolonging the inevitable.
“Shhh,” he soothed, brushing away the stray hairs that clung to my sweating forehead. “A queen must always possess patience.”
“A queen must always receive her orgasm!” I countered, borderline desperate. “Please, baby!”
I reached out in search of his erection and gently tugged on the soft flesh, applying just the right amount of pressure. Two could play at this game and given I was the most competitive person I knew, I was sure to win.
“Aren’t you feeling resilient tonight?” he tutted, enjoying my disruptive behaviour. “Does my love need reminding who is boss?”
“No, sir,” I replied, moving his hands away from in between my legs and positioning them on my chest. “Your love is just desperate. She may even beg.”
At this, Spencer firmly palmed both my breasts, paying special attention to my rock hard nipples. He licked and sucked on one, all awhile he fondled the other with his fingers, making sure both were seen to with equal deliberation.
“Let’s hear it, then,” he prompted, relieving my nipple with a small pop.
“Hear what?” I questioned, dizzy from his delicious assault.
“Beg for me.”
It took me a moment to register his demand but I soon settled into my role, understanding that this was exactly what we both needed.
“Please, sir. I’m begging for you to be inside me,” I moaned, surprising myself with such a detailed reply.
He responded with silence but carefully and slowly slid his thick cock into my greedy entrance, gifting me the perfect opportunity to release his name on a satisfied groan. My own was called out as he began his precise thrusts, all awhile I dug my fingernails into his broad back. I could hardly stand it when he was this loving. It terrified me to no end. Love for a family member was different. I couldn’t imagine life without my mum, dad, and brother though with Spencer, it was the exact opposite. I often found myself thinking about the idea of succumbing to a life without him and was disturbingly miserable afterwards. Without my family, I simply wouldn’t exist. Without Spencer, I would be lost. A wandering woman who had the unfortunate pleasure of knowing love, yet destined to be alone forever. Because there was no one else after Spencer. I knew I would never love another man in my life. He was it for me and that scared me more than anything.
“Everything will be alright, won’t it?” he asked, rather randomly seeking assurance.
“Of course it will,” I expressed, grabbing his face and kissing it senseless. “As long as we have each other, we’ll fight this,” I continued, almost losing myself in the sensations he was gifting me.
“I love you, Jessica Turner,” he whispered, moving his attention to my collarbone.
Inch by inch, he slowly snacked on my body, leaving me with nothing to do but pant my appreciation. I begged and pleaded for release, finally receiving it in the form of a very sexy, “Come for me, Jess!”
I loudly did as instructed and took him along with me, squeezing him with all my might. His huge body shook as he spilled his seed into me, howling my name like a man possessed.
“Will you come back to bed now?” I asked, breathing my enquiry across his flushed cheeks.
“Anything for you.”
He quickly pulled on his bottoms and sought out my pyjamas, offering me the creased up bundle soon after. Then, being a man of his word, he carried me up to bed using me as his eyes and settled in next to me.
“Thank you,” he murmured, cementing his front to my back.
I had no idea why he was stating his gratification but found I took a liking towards his warm body pressed into mine.
“For sticking by me,” he explained, burying his nose in my hair. “I come with baggage and you didn’t sign up for this.”
“I seem to recall only signing up for complete submission, which by the way, we need to discuss. Our contract is up for renewal.” I laughed, grabbing his hand and resting it over my stomach.
“I’ll have Calvin change the dates,” he joked, squeezing my hand in his.
There was a long stretch of silence and for a while, I was sure he had fallen asleep.
“Spencer?” I whispered, testing his consciousness.
“I didn’t sign up for any of this but what I got was so much more than what I could’ve hoped for.” I twisted in my position to face him. “Not only have I met the man of my dreams, I’ve also had the pleasure of getting to know his beautiful daughter.”
His features softened in the darkened room.
“I miss her,” he admitted, tone reserved.
“I do too but we’ll get her back soon. I promise.”
I watched as he closed his eyes and witnessed the very moment he nodded off, too afraid to look away. Instead, I continued to stare at his gorgeous face and remained there until the morning sun made its appearance. Attempting sleep was pointless and by eight O’clock, I decided to make us both a nutritious breakfast in the hopes it would set us up for the day ahead. Fruit, pastries, eggs. Perhaps I was overcompensating but I couldn’t help myself. I was nervous.
Tomorrow marked the most important day of Spencer’s life and possibly mine too.
We had to win.