Honesty to Oneself
There was a dragging weight to Kira when she woke that Monday. Not of getting up and returning to the day class, but the fact she had not slept since Saturday morning and ran on nothing, but adrenaline. Jake called her that morning and offered to take her to school--Kira saw it as his chance to flee his future in-laws and refused. It was likely he was worried as well, today is the first time she has gone back to the day class since then. Kira paid no mind to it, she didn’t care because now it was likely they would leave her be.
Outside the Headmaster waited for her, asking for Kira to follow him to his office and discuss an issue from the locker room. In his office, before the main room Kira passed three girls: Jess and her two minions whose names Kira paid no attention to know or care.
“Kira, there were some concerned people who reported that you’ve been bullied and that the Friday before your absence things escalated violently.” The principle recited from memory.
She was not physically harmed--mentally she recovered, but for a full-on report to be filed it would be an unnecessary trouble on the main house. As she has always done Kira will bite her tongue and remain silent.
Kira shrugged, “We got into an argument, but nothing happened really.”
“Are you sure?” Headmaster did not know about the night class, nor about vampires to her knowledge. He would not understand her situation therefore it would be difficult to explain.
“You know you can come to me, anytime right?” He continued, “I know you’re a part-time student, but you are still my student.”
Kira smiled when rising and shaking the headmaster’s hand, “Thank you.” Upon leaving she slowed at the three girls, but continued walking.
“What did you say?” Jess asked fearfully but was ignored as Kira returned to class. The room was quiet at first, but then everyone swarmed her, flooding each corner of her personal space. Kira was too dumbfounded to speak.
“We heard what those seniors did to you!” People rushed her in all directions, “Are you alright?” It was a shock, “Let us know if you need anything!”
News spread fast--no rumors spread often. There were more than seniors in the locker room, even one or two girls in this class were there. They stayed further to the back and in silence kept their heads low. Kira had never had this many human swarm her, rather it could be the fact they are going out of their way is what surprises her the most. It was an odd pleasantry for them to be around be and talking to her. It was nice they all knew her name, but she didn’t know any of theirs aside from teachers and Jess.
“I’m fine.” She stuttered, “I had some guests visiting my house and an audition, that’s the only reason I was gone.”
Everyone breathed easier. Kira tilts her head quizzically, were they worried about her--she stood her head, of course not, that’s wishful thinking.
“Hey is it true? That you left with a guy, after he came busting in to the girl’s locker room?”
Kira became coy, embarrassed that she had to be rescued by her friend from the night class. They would not know about that class; therefore, a quick lie is the only way to dismiss these stories. An evil idea appears in her mind:
“Why don’t you ask those two.” Pointing to the girls hiding in the back, all attention is diverted to them. Like wolves on sheep half the class charged, while the others sat down and engaged in conversation with Kira. After a time without the teacher the door opened to Doctor Addy entering with a folder.
“Mrs. Brown is out today due to illness. Fortunately for you all I’m also certified as a teacher and will be your substitute until she comes back.”
Kira felt relieved. No more problems from seniors, no more distractions at home, no more confusion--everything was falling into a place of harmony. For once, regardless the reason, Kira was happy that her classmates were talking to her. They felt the same, many never knew how to approach Kira, who often looked she never wanted to socialize or was so fragile they were afraid she would break. Doctor Addy noticed the lightness in her human companion’s mood and felt an accomplishment has been met toward Kira having somewhat of a normal life. Class concluded, but the servant stayed behind as the room emptied.
“I think this has been the first ‘normal’ day you’ve had.” Doctor Addy laughed lightly when leaning forward.
“Yeah...it was really nice. I didn’t think humans could be as nice as vampires--” Emily cut her off, “Might as well say ‘us’. You’re about as close as a human gets to being immortal, maybe even more.” The doctor corrected, having a temptation to pop a smoke shortly. Kira smiled lightly when pulling a chair beside the desk and sitting.
“How are you feeling? Given how loud your heart was beating, I’d say things went fairly well at the ball.”
Kira mumbled, “I’m fine...but...at the ball...Eona she...”
Doctor Addy moved closer, engaging an interest in this subject. Kira is slowly becoming a school-girl--coiling from shyness and embarrassment, the racing of her heart provides a clue to the fluttering emotions this human is experiencing. How can such a firm and unwavering young woman have such a frail heart that it would be thrown off this much?
“Did she ask if you wanted to be turned?” The doctor asked without warning.
Kira burst red, “N-no! She wouldn’t do that--she’s done everything to avoid that! I’m not--!” Kira averted her gaze, “There’s no reason to turn me, I’m just a human servant.”
“How thick-headed are you?” The doctor growled.
“What?” The human blinked surprised.
Kira is taken to the back wall; all doors locked, windows shut and blacked out allowing a faint trace of light to pass into the room. She listened when rising from the ground. This human is either very obtuse to another’s feelings, or quite good at hiding her own.
“Tell me, why do you think Lady Eona attacked you in the first place? Our Pureblood Queen who has never once shown weakness, how is it that she attacks a human that she has so carefully raised?”
Kira bit her tongue, knowing one truth: she is a human and Eona is a vampire; prey and predator. Kira came to terms long ago, that one day she may be used to quench the queen’s thirst and even if it’s for a short time Kira was content with that. Whatever that was at the ball...it couldn’t be real--nothing good will come out of the two of them being together like that.
The doctor was not as content because Kira has no idea what vampires feel. It’s not her fault either that she could not...as a child, but now it is not so, now she is no child and not blinded by the ‘adult world’. Its rather arrogant on Kira’s part though; to play the fool and ignore such things because of her own bindings ‘her’ definition of right and wrong. Something like this has happened before, pushed into a corner and at the mercy of a vampire.
“Stop playing the innocent act—high-ranking vampires don’t attack blindly, and you know it. Something else happened at the ball—!”
Kira spun around and seized the doctors arm. She—! At once the blinds opened and allowed light into the room once more. There the two stood, one wore a frustrated glare and the other gave a small surprise at the speed of the other.
The doctor continued, “A vampire’s thirst can only be satisfied by the one they love. Remind me again whose blood Lady Eona fed on.”
The high school-er releases the doctor and slams her fist into the wall breaking thru it. She clenches it harder, causing the blood to drip on the floor. The queen could not love her, she could not afford for the queen to love her! This was the first time Kira had heard these words out loud, but she knew it was true; she forced the very idea to be buried the moment it came to mind.
It was an unconscious defense against her personal emotions interfering with her duty. Purebloods are few to begin with and it is only natural that they keep the bloodline pure and marry and reproduce with other Purebloods. Species was out of the question seeing among lower class vampires it was rather common. The doctor hates what Kira is doing to both her and the queen. Is the queen exempt from knowing love as well? The most powerful of vampires and the mother of them all is subject to the laws of her children?
The doctor leaned forward, “Kira did ‘you’ try to confess?”
“No! I do--I can’t have those feelings for her!
Kira’s heart has become as hard as stone now. This has happened before, when she closes herself off to everyone and wears a false smile. It becomes impossible to read her at that point and when she degrades to that level. If that’s all...then its time, then. The doctor takes Kira hand and changes their positions within an instant.
“So say I’m Lady Eona and I confess to you now, offer to turn you and spend all of eternity you would say...”
“What are you...” Kira’s sentence trails off as she is backed into a corner, feeling something different than the other night.
Doctor Addy came closer whisper into Kira’s ear, “No you don’t love me or no you don’t want to be turned...”
Kira found herself have no force to her words, “This isn’t funny—”
“I’m not joking. If the queen is serious about you…” The doctor explained, “Then I’m preparing you for what will happen.”
Her words were kryptonite, draining every ounce of strength Kira had. With Eona it was different, Kira was as prey beneath hungry eyes, drawn in hypnosis, feeling like a magnet to the enchantment of the queen. Now she felt an excitement, a heat in her body by the closeness of the woman in front of her. This was not what Kira imagined would happen. The doctor’s lushes, thick, brunette hair smelled sweet like vanilla as its held high in a ponytail. She pins her knee between Kira’s legs and stops there. Those eyes, crimson glowing capture the human in their trap, dropping the defenses that are helpless against this power.
“Have you forgotten? Lady Eona is a woman too, she knows what will make your body and mind bend to her will yet has held herself back--for now.”
Kira went red, her body and mind recalling the sensations from the other night causing her to lose her self-control for a moment. The doctor turns her attention to Kira’s bleeding and bruised hand. Her eyes returned to blue and her fangs were pulled back when tending to the hand. Kira deserved to be bullied this way for being both inconsiderate and arrogant. Unlike Lady Eona however, she knows there is a limit to what Kira can handle. Her master seems to like to push those limits which can inflict harm to Kira on an emotional and potentially physical level. A window is opened and the bell rings, thankfully there was no second period for this class.
The doctor withdrew her presence, “I’ll write you a pass.”
Kira sat on the desk as her hand was cleaned and wrapped. Nothing worth stitches, though it’s possible her wrist had been sprained.
“I don’t remember you hitting that hard.” The doctor examined the wall, recalling a similar incident in the girl’s locker room not long ago.
Kira said nothing.
“Be angry all you want, but you need to stop living in a fantasy that things will remain as they are.”
“At least I stopped.” She sighed when inhaling another puff of her smoke that hung in her mouth as she performed her craft, “I’d never force you to do anything.”
“I’m not mad at you...” Kira mumbled, “I was just surprised.”
“What that I stopped? We could always continue if you want--”
Kira blushed, “A-as if! I just didn’t expect you to do that! I mean when Lady Eona kissed me—!” Kira imminently bit her tongue.
Oh? So that’s what happened, I wonder if she is more flustered since that was her first kiss or that it was from the queen.
The doctor laughs when putting her forehead against Kira’s. As a young woman she hesitated because out of all the vampires (nearly all older than her) she has always been treated as a child. Dr. Addy is different, she doesn’t see Kira as a person, though she still teases like everyone else. The doctor is the only adult outside the main house that can be spoken to normally, without formalities.
“Either you’re truly oblivious or a very good lair. Still, you can keep pretending, you’re very good at that.”
The pass is finished, but not handed to her. Kira felt offended hearing that out loud and wondered what the gain in it was being said.
“I’m not pretending...there’s nothing to pretend about. We’re two different people, two different sides--it’s impossible before it would begin.” Kira stared are her wrapped hand, “Even if it could work...Lady Eona is the queen and has a responsibility to your people. As her servant it’s my duty to do what I can to keep her on the right path.”
Doctor Addy pulls away and puffs again, “So if it was anyone else it wouldn’t be a problem?”
“I dunno...” Kira fails at hiding her blushing face, “I never thought about it...falling in love.”
“And that’s your problem. You need to start thinking about what ‘you’ want, so from now on you’re going to spend your Sundays with me.”
Kira took the pass and went toward be door. She didn’t argue or resist, Dr. Addy is someone that can be trusted therefore if she wants something it only makes sense to do it. The following days people socialized with Kira, ate with her and slowly she began to understand her own kind just a bit more. All her life humans were deceptive, self-righteous and traitorous in her eyes. Kira believed herself the exception because of her living under the vampire gods and being under their guidance. Not all humans were as she thought and regretfully she placed them under the same category of those who abandoned her.
This was an unfair charge. The people here, they reflected her life among the immortal: funny, moody, angry, perky. If you compare, humans out number vampires in compassionate people. The same could be said in trust worthy people still. Vampires are loyal to their kin; protect each other (it maybe for the sake of clan preservation, but it’s something). Jess was alone today, all who feared her now abandoned her. Ironic how ‘loyalty’ has different meanings to different people.
On the last day before the weekend, Kira wanted to change things--if she could become friends with Jess faith within humanity would be restored. She sat down across from Jess whose presence was gloomy and heavy. No one dared approach them, but rather watched from afar, some even prepared to separate them during a fight. The entire lunch neither spoke.
Sunday came before she knew. Dr. Addy had given Kira her number, saying to text when she arrived at the cafe. She drove in a red convertible and for a moment Kira was in too much aw to realize it was the doctor. Always in a white trench coat it was a surprise to see her in jeans and a leather jacket--just dressing casual is a culture shock. Kira jumped in and the two enjoyed a quiet ride to a local arcade.
“Doctor Addy why--”
“We’re not in school, call me by my first name.”
Kira mumbled when the two walked into the arcade and asked the same question. The adult explained Kira had no real childhood. It wasn’t her fault because most of that childhood was either in a prison cell or playing catchup with society. Now she has the chance and because their queen refused the doctor would snatch Kira away. The arcade games were alien, they were not heard of nor played for that matter.
“...Emily?” Kira leaned over the rails as her friend competed against the computers on Dance Dance Revolution
“Why are you doing this for me?” Kira asked.
“You’re a junior in high school, you should be doing this with friends.” Quickly Emily spun around and pulled Kira onto the second platform. She followed the doctor’s moments
“I don’t...really have friends that would go out with me.” Kira asked breathlessly trying to keep up on the game.
“Oh? And I don’t count as a friend? I’m hurt.”
Kira quickly apologized but was ridiculed for being unable to recognize sarcasm.
The sun died after an entire day of games, running and surprises. This must be what it’s like to live what humans define as a ‘normal’ day. In the sky reds, pinks and oranges colored on blank canvas. As nature’s blend gave an unforgettable sight to the naked eye Kira and Emily sat on the hood of the senpai’s car and ate. They laughed at stories from the past--mainly Emily’s seeing as she has lived since the 16th century. Surprisingly though all her habits are modern, and she has no attachment to her roots in England.
“So, this will be normal? Every Sunday?” Kira asked quietly, fearing a change in mind.
Emily nods, shutting her eyes and feeling the breeze on her marble skin. Kira would never complain, never hate spending this time.
“This is nice.”
Slowly she exhales shutting her eyes and feeling the warmth of the day. Emily watches her carefully, every muscle, every vain, every beautiful feature her junior has. The doctor had forgotten--Kira is nocturnal and the fact she’s been awake this whole time is astonishing. Emily chuckles, Kira has already fallen asleep. When sitting up and sliding off the hood the vampire moves to the human’s side and takes Kira into her arms. She held the tiny girl in her arms and pulled her even closer before putting her back in the car.
Emily leaned her head forward and kissed Kira on the forehead, “I’m going to break your curse.”