“I just got your mother into bed. She is clean and fed. I turned her shows on for her.”
“Thanks, babe,” I said as Tiffany took a seat next to me.
“Are you okay, you look like you have something on your mind?” She asked me. Yeah, a fucking lot. I said to myself.
“No, I’m just tired,” I said and leaned back in my chair. My head has been spinning since my angel bumped into me tonight. I tried so hard to hate her. Anything to get her out of my head. Nothing worked, her beautiful face stayed in my head. Even to this day, she was on my mind.
Life hasn’t been the easiest for me. When Candace my best friend and my angel left. Life got dull. Mason stayed with me. He helped me through the rough days. He missed her too. My family life has always been shit. My mother has always loved my older brother Sean more than me. She treated him as though he was a god. Even though he was one of the biggest scum bags to walk the planet. Even though he was addicted to drugs and stole money from her every time she looked away. He wasn’t always a loser. In fact, he used to be my hero. I don’t know what turned him, but he was deeply involved with the wrong people. My mother wasted all her money trying to save him. Our father was never in the picture and my mother always had different men coming and going from our home.
The only choice I had was to try and stay away as long as I could. Candace and Marcus became my escape. They were the only ones I had ever trusted. My two very best friends. Candace’s family was like my family. Then things changed and I fell in love with Candace. The only person I had ever truly given my heart to. I may have been in the wrong, but when she chooses to just leave both Mason and myself. I was angry and hurt. I don’t know how to deal with my feelings. In the first six months, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I was angry all the time. I even tried to sleep with other women just to try and make myself feel something. A month before Mason was to leave me for school. My brother was shot and killed in front of me and my mother. I’ll never forget that night.
I had been fighting with my mother about letting Sean come back to the house. He had stolen her purse the last time he was here. Right in front of her face. Here she was again letting this fucker inside. I had just happened to be home that night. Sean and I ended up in a fistfight in the front yard. My mother was screaming at me to stop fighting Sean. Even though he was doing a good job of beating my ass. That’s when about three guys walked up into our yard and put a gun to my brother’s head. The guy shot him and then pointed the gun at me. I just stood there with my own brother’s blood all over me. My eyes stayed on the shooter’s eyes. The guys ended up running off. We found out later that Sean owed these people thousands of dollars. They were caught and sent to prison for the rest of their lives.
My mother on the other hand. She lost her mind that night and ended up in a mental health hospital. Something in her mind never healed itself. She has never been cleared to function on her own. There was nothing I could do for her at the time. That's when my world hit rock bottom. I got into some drugs and if it wasn’t for Mason and Tiffany I would be either dead or on the streets. Tiffany ran into me one night at a party. The drugs were everywhere and I was higher than a kite. Mason had been trying to find me. She was there with some loser that was beating her ass and I stopped him. Even in my high state, I was able to kick this guys ass. Tiffany got a hold of my phone that night and let Mason know where we were. He came and got my ass out of there and took me into his home. Tiffany came around and did everything she could for me and after time I was nothing but grateful for her.
Mason is my true lifesaver. He got me to straighten myself out. He paid for me to go to college where I got my head out of my ass. Tiffany was gone during my college years. She was going back to school herself. Once I earned my business degree. I opened my own gun store here in our home town. I even offer free classes Monday through Thursday. I teach gun safety and drug control. My doors are always open to anyone in need. Once I was making my own money. I paid back every dime Mason had ever given me. I bought my own home and got my mother out of the hospital. I am her twenty four hour care. With the help of some nurses that come by twice a week.
I ran into Tiffany again and the two of us started dating. Tiffany had turned her life completely around. Her whole personality had changed. She wasn’t the hateful bitch we all knew. She was actually very kind and a wonderful help to me. I had always been grateful for her just being here. I felt almost like I owed it to her when she asked if I would have dinner with her. I have been with her for the last three years. She lives with me and helps me take care of my mother while she runs her own business from home. She is very good with my mother and my mother doesn't trust most people, but she trusts Tiffany. It’s a huge help to me.
I haven’t really questioned my feelings for Tiffany. It was almost like we just went through life together and things were smooth. I cared about her very much, but I had never asked myself If I loved her. I guess I do, otherwise, why would I keep her around. I know she loves me, she tells me all the time.
The one thing I have never told anyone was the fact that I never had a day go by that Candace wasn’t on my mind. I was grateful that at least Tiffany didn’t notice her at the store tonight. Candace’s name has never been brought up between us. I’m not even sure how Tiffany would react to Candace now. I was so pissed off that Mason didn’t warn me. At least let me know she was coming. Fuck me if my heart didn’t fall out of my ass when I realized it was her standing in front of me. She wasn’t the little girl I was used to. She was a woman and a fucking fine one at that. Even though she had her fine ass in some tight jeans and a coat. I saw her tattoo on her ribs. She had a half shirt on under her coat. I never thought she would get a tat. Her hair was cut to her shoulders and her skin shinned like silk. I knew I was screwed the minute I looked into her beautiful eyes.
Now here I sit rethinking my whole life. I chewed Mason out tonight but once again he put me in my place. Who the fuck was I lying to? Of course, I wanted nothing more than to pull her into my arms and feel her against me again. Mason said he would try and get her to come to see me tomorrow at the shop. Tiffany was leaving to go to her parents for the day. Not that I wanted to lie to her about Candace, but I needed to talk to her without there being any problems. If Mason couldn’t get her to come. I would show up at her parents. I at least owed her that much. Besides I also needed to know what her coming back into my life meant. It’s not a lie. I knew she was living in New York. I didn’t think Mason knew it, but I did. About five years ago I saw her, she never saw me, but I saw her. I flew out to New York to see Mason. I tracked her down and happened to see her sitting in the park having lunch with some dushbag guy. I was going to go to her but when I saw her with someone. I just thought it was best to leave her be. She was even beautiful then. I watched her for a while. I watched her smile and laugh. My heart hurt even then. I missed her so much. I was a coward back then and still one to this day.
I was cleaning a few guns talking with Mr. Hans and his two young boys when I heard the bell go off from the front door. I looked up and my beautiful angel came walking in alone. Mason was not with her. She looked around my store for a moment before her eyes landed on mine. Fuck, I swear all the air in my lungs left. She gave me a small smile. She was in black leggings and a fur-lined black coat. I could see red fabric sticking out under her coat. Her hair was slicked down and she was breathtaking. I finished helping Mr. Hans and his boys. I said goodbye as they left the store. I walked around the counter and came close to her. She just stood there looking at me. I could tell she was nervous. I didn’t say anything to her. I just watched her for a moment. I knew she was trying to figure out what to say to me. I was an ass to her last night. I hated that she was nervous.
“Marcus...” She started to say. I cut her off and reached out and pulled her into my arms.