Confession of a Gay Gangster

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chapter 6

//can’t upload chapter 5 due to explicit content

[isaiah]

Who would have thought that I’d find myself in this kind of situation, tied in a chair while being kept inside what seemed like a storage house? This was the kind of scene I’d usually watch in those corny telenovelas they kept playing every night, the same show that dad and I were addicted as they were stupid yet amusing.

I sighed inwardly, looking around the dark place. The only source of light was the hanging light bulb above me—how cliché was this, god damn it?! Were they some villains in movies, with thugs and all that would surround me looking menacing and shit?

True enough, five men came forward, emerging from the darkness like they were some cult. I looked at them, observing the tough stares they were giving me. I could see in their gazes the excitement they had and quite honestly, it’s funny to see them like this. They obviously think they could defeat a man tied in a chair, but little did they know that I could break out from these ropes in a second.

But just in case something interesting happen, let’s keep playing the victim.

“Is this the fag you ruined your date, Martinez?” the guy from the middle said. He wore a leather jacket that looked awfully hot that I almost felt sorry for the idiot.

I kept my mouth shut, resisting the urge to say something that would earn me a punch on the face.

Not yet, Iza. Calm down.

“Yeah, this is the guy.” Remus Martinez came forward, hands in his jean pockets while smoking a cigarette. He wasn’t playing the friendly, boy-next-door persona he had to fool Stephanie and possibly all the girls he’s been trying to hit online. That cold gaze he had only belonged to a person who had seen and done evil things. Smirking at me, he walked towards and said, “remember me, bitch?”

Count from one to three, Iza.

One.

Two.

Three.

“I do,” I said after successfully calming myself.

Control your temper, Iza.

“Acting pretty docile now, huh?” Remus said, snickering at me. All of a sudden, he grabbed a lock of my hair, forcing me to look up. “Too bad you’ve picked the wrong person to threaten,” he said through gritted teeth before blowing the smoke of the cigarette right on my face. “I’ll fuck you up.”

I gagged from his poor choice of words. He might be the last man on Earth and I’d still refuse to get close to him. Gross. “Get away from me,” I said, returning the smirk he had on his disgusting face, “your breath stinks.”

I heard some of the guys in the back stifle their laughs. Remus growled, hitting me straight on the face with a jab. It stung when his fist connected on my nose, but it wasn’t enough to break it.

Weak.

“You think this is funny?!” Remus yelled, his voice deep and animalistic. “I’ll fucking kill you!”

I rolled my eyes at him, letting my mouth free just to tease him. “Oh, come on,” I said, aggravating him further, “if you wanted to kill me, you should have done it.”

Another punch and he managed to make my nose bleed. I groaned, moving my jaw from side to side before giggling. “Man, you punch like a fag,” I commented, looking up at Remus who stared at me in disbelief. Blood trickled down my nose and I licked it, tasting the metal in my mouth. “Punch me like you mean it, Remus. Do it!”

“You—!”

“What are you doing?”

Remus was frozen, his eyes widening in fear as soon as he heard that voice. I tried to look who spoke because it sounded hot.

Wait, what?

Turning around to face the person who just arrived, his back straighten as he began to stammer nervously. “H-hey, boss! What are you doing here?”

It was too dark to see who it was, but I was getting desperate to see where that voice belonged to because it was a complete turn on. Unlike the others who sounded like they were going through puberty, the guy who talked had a dominating semblance to it, as if he was a person who had the face of a god.

What the hell, Iza?! You’re being tortured and all you can think of were hot guys?!

Finally, the man came out of the dark, and much to my surprise, it was the same person who bumped into me back when Stephanie and I were in the mall to meet this bastard.

My heart skipped a beat the second I saw him. Everyone just vanished as my gaze focused on him, observing his face like it was sculpted in precision, making sure everything was perfect and beautiful. His dark eyes fell on me and I gulped, feeling nervous all of a sudden. He blinked, confused why I was in this predicament.

“Seriously, Martinez?” he said, his voice sounding even more sensual to me. Was it possible for a man to arouse me this much?! He was a walking sex god!

“Listen, boss,” Martinez said, waving his hands to explain what the situation was this guy. Whoever he was, I could easily tell he was respected and feared. Remus was acting like the boss a minute ago and now he’s yapping like a dog in front of its master. Pathetic. “This guy pissed me off!”

The guy rolled his eyes and I couldn’t help but smile at how adorable it was. Damn, I think I’m losing it. Was this the effect of Remus’ punch? “Didn’t I tell you not to cause any trouble while we’re outside?”

“But he’s annoying! And he deserved to be taught a lesson, Liam!”

I perked up, my eyes widening as soon as I heard what his name was. Liam, huh? It fits him.

With an exasperated sigh, Liam patted Remus’ shoulder. “Never involve a civilian, Martinez. Have you forgotten about that?”

Remus gulped, standing still like he was turned into a stone. “Y-yes, I’m sorry.”

“Clean this up,” Liam said, and the others began scampering away, turning the lights on and revealing to me where they took me exactly. Indeed, I was in a storage house, as there were dozens of boxes surrounding the place. I looked up and saw the tall curved ceiling that was made out of windows. It was dark, I wonder what time it was.

Wait.

Oh shit! Dad! He must be looking for me, fuck!

Easily ripping the ropes behind me, I saw Remus’ eyes bulged out of its sockets. The others also gasped watching me taking it off like it was made out of paper. I stood up from the chair and walked towards Remus, giving back the punch he just gifted me a while ago. But unlike his, I broke his nose which cracked against my knuckles. He cried out, blood spurting as he clutched his bloody nose. I was holding back my strength when I punched him the first time and it satisfied me to see him with a broken and bloody nose.

“That’s how you punch, bitch,” I said, smirking at him.

Remus collapsed on the floor, tears streaming from his eyes. “Y-you fucker!” he cried out.

I pouted at him and cooed, “aw, did that hurt? Aren’t you a man? Suck it up!”

Out of nowhere, Liam laughed. Everyone turned quiet as they watched their leader cackle, and I stared at him at awe. How could someone laugh so beautifully, I was almost enthralled?

Snapping out of my trance, I playfully glared at him. “What are you laughing at, huh?!”

“Sorry,” he muttered, stifling his laughter while Remus eyed him in misery, humiliated that his own boss was laughing instead of helping him. “It’s…it’s just my first time seeing someone so cool.”

I stared at him, my jaw dropping in confusion. “What? Aren’t people like you who belong to gangs supposed to be cool?”

Liam smiled and I swore I just melted. Why does he look so god damn handsome and beautiful at the same time, it’s unfair! “There’s nothing cool about people like us.” He walked towards me, motioning the others to pick Remus up from the floor and bring him away. They did and I watched the idiot get dragged by his friends, looking as pathetic as ever I almost felt sorry for him.

“I’m sorry about that,” Liam said, standing in front of me. He was a tad smaller than I was, but he looked intimidating now that he stood inches away from me. I tried to look like I wasn’t affected by how terrifying he was up close. He might have a calm aura, but I could see right through those bleak eyes how dangerous he truly was.

This guy wasn’t normal.

He wasn’t like Remus or the others who obviously belonged to a gang.

This one was in another league.

He’s scary.

“I need to teach my boys how to act like normal citizens,” he continued, smiling at me. “That’s what you get when you isolate them long enough. They tend to get wild.”

I swallowed the saliva stuck in my throat before opening my mouth. “Who are you?” I asked, mesmerized by those grey orbs that looked straight into mine.

Liam merely smiled, avoiding answering my question. “I’ll let someone bring you back,” he said, turning around to walk away from me. “I’ll also give you compensation from what Remus did. I hope you won’t press any charges. You won’t win anyway.”

He left me alone in the middle of the damn storage house, speechless.

“Wait, what?”


As promised, someone from Liam’s group brought me back to my house. Throughout the ride, I was silent. The man who drove me appeared to be older than the rest of those guys and I figured he was their guardian or some sort?

Who were they exactly? I could tell Remus was in a gang, he acted as if he was. But Liam, he was different. Yes, he was the leader of whatever the gang was but it’s not just an ordinary group that deals with stuff that was weird but not enough to send them to jail. Whoever they were, they’re different from the gangs that I used to know.

I tried to calm my racing heart. It’s been so long since I felt this excited and scared, the exhilarating feeling of inserting myself into something so dangerous thrilled me. Was it normal to be like this, to be attracted to someone that obviously had a questionable background? It was like I’m a moth coming close to that fascinating ball of light only to kill me afterward.

Shit, calm down, Iza.

I’m acting like this just because Liam was my type.

It’s not because I loved the menace he carries.

That’s weird.

I’m not like that.

Right?

The man dropped me by my house, giving me a somber look without saying anything. I got out and stared at him driving away, disappearing into the darkness of the road. I stood in front of our house for a long time, remembering everything that happened tonight.

Holding my chest, I smiled to myself.

Liam, huh?

I wonder what kind of secrets he had.

I can’t wait to find out.

“Isaiah!” I gasped out loud, shocked to hear my little sister screaming my name. I turned around and saw her running towards me. “Where the hell have you been?!” she asked, her eyes red and swollen. Had she been crying?

“What?”

She sniffled, her face scrunching as she bawled. “D-dad’s been looking for you! He’s at the police station!”

I suddenly became cold. “Shit.”


I ran to the police station, my heart thumping out of my chest.

Shit, I’m so dead. So dead!

I barged inside the building, ignoring the drunk man who was sprawled on the floor. I saw Mr. Danilo, a police officer that was close to my dad as they were drinking buddies and neighbors. He saw me running to the front desk where he was and was surprised to see me.

“What the hell, Isaiah?!” he yelled, dropping the phone. “Where have you been?! Your father’s been looking all over for you!”

I could hear the chattering from inside the station where the prisoners were held momentarily before driving them to the penitentiary where they’d stay for a long time. It wasn’t my first time to be here as I was a frequent troublemaker who’d pick up fights against anyone who I see was causing havoc in our place.

“It’s a long story, sir,” I replied, panting from running.

Officer Danilo “Jesus, Isaiah, you—”

“Isaiah Julian!”

I lost all the color in my face, turning around to see dad marching towards me. His face was red, his eyebrows curled into an angry curve as he glared at me. “Where the hell have you been?!” he asked, grabbing my shirt collar.

It’s hopeless to even explain what happened to dad. If I tell him I was abducted by the guy who Stephanie dated for a day, not only would I be in trouble, but she too would be dragged into this messy situation. I didn’t want that.

“I-I’m sorry, dad,” I said, averting my gaze off him.

“When will you learn, when?!” he screamed.

Officer Danilo stepped in to pull dad away from me as he was close to punching me. But he stopped, seeing the blood on my shirt from my nose bleeding a while ago. Dad was horrified, and he shook me to demand where I got the blood. “How many times, Isaiah?! How many times did I tell you to behave?!”

“Calm down, Andres!” Officer Danilo yelled, preserving the police station’s peace. I was more than fortunate that we were in a place where dad wouldn’t be able to hurt me.

“How can I calm down when he’s being like this?!” dad retorted, his teeth grinding in sheer anger. I backed away, fearing for my life. “How can I calm down when my son is acting like his mother, risking his own life for others?!”

What he said hurt me. I always knew why dad was this strict with me and it’s because of what happened to mom. She died protecting other people, sharing the same strong integrity that she had, dad feared I might end up like her.

“I know, Andres,” his police friend, patting his back to calm him down.

Dad’s glare softened, seeing the terror in me after bringing up mom. His shoulders shrugged, and for the first time, he walked away from me rather than dragging me back home to discipline me.

I stood in the police station, frozen. A woman entered, her eyes darting around only to find her husband on the floor, drunk and passed out. She began to squeal, berating him like a child. The officer tasked to look after him helped the woman release her husband, briefly rolling his eyes at how loud the woman was.

“Look, kid,” Officer Danilo started, getting my attention. I looked at him, perplexed. I didn’t know what to do. Seeing dad walk away from me scared me even more. It was as if he just gave up. “Your dad’s doing his best to protect you,” he said, smiling kindly at me. “He didn’t want what happened to your mom happening to you.”

My throat hurt, feeling the incoming tears. But I held it in, refusing to look weak in front of people. “I know that,” I said. “I’m sorry for the trouble I caused.”


Arriving back at the house, dad was already in his room. Sam greeted me, hugging me. She told me how frantic dad was after a neighbor told him that he saw me being dragged inside a van. I couldn’t imagine how scared he might have felt after hearing that, panicking that he could potentially lose another family.

I wanted to tell him what exactly happened, but I couldn’t. Explaining things to him would only add more fuel to the fire. He wouldn’t even believe me if I tell him I was involved in a fight because of Stephanie. I only wanted what’s best for my best friend.

But never did I expect it would lead to this; disappointing my dad and making him worried.

Fuck, I’m so stupid.

Every time I try to do the right thing, it’d only end up backfiring.

“Fight for what you think is right, Isaiah.”

Remembering mom’s words, I wondered if the right thing was to turn a blind eye when someone clearly needed my help. Should I just turn my back away when I could plainly see them getting stomped by those who had the power and money to do anything they wanted?

Could I do that?


Waking up at around four, I readied myself to go to school. I wanted to talk to dad last night but was afraid he might turn me away. I’d rather have him beat me up than to ignore me.

I was about to take a bath but noticed someone was in the dining room. I peeked at the doorway and saw dad sitting at the table, his arms crossed in front of him. He was buried in his thoughts.

Did he even sleep?

“Dad…?” I softly called, walking towards him as carefully as I could.

“Sit, Isaiah,” he beckoned.

I swallowed hard, my hands shaking while I pulled the chair. I sat down, facing dad. He was staring at me, his lips rigid and tight. I looked away, afraid that I’d cry out of frustration. I was up all night, thinking about how I could make it up to him. Should I buy something, maybe a cake as a consolation gift?

I was sorry, I really am. I shouldn’t have punched Remus. That was the start of everything. If I could have just bit my tongue and forced Stephanie to stop seeing that fucker, this wouldn’t have happened.

But it already did, and I’m regretting everything.

“What happened last night, dad, I—”

“Don’t bother, Isaiah,” dad interrupted, his glare as sharp as a knife. I sunk onto the seat, my lips quivering in fear. “It doesn’t matter what your reason is.”

He’s angry.

Of course, he would be.

“You really just can’t help it, can you?” The quietness of the room didn’t help. Dad’s voice was like a clap of thunder, frightening and startling me to the core. “No matter how many times I tell you to stay out of trouble, you just have to find your way back and involve yourself in things that can kill you.”

“Dad,” I called his name, not knowing what to say to defend myself. Because dad was right. I loved the thrill of danger, I seek it. The way I was back when Remus kidnapped me and tied me in that chair, I was desperate to show them what I got. I wanted to put them back in their place and make them bleed for thinking they could do whatever they wanted just because they could.

I wanted to hurt him, for misleading Stephanie and hurting her.

“I did everything, Isaiah. I want to trust you but every time I do, you always break it.” I was close to crying. I couldn’t handle the disappointment in dad’s voice. It hurt so much. “Your mom died protecting someone else.” I bit my lip, stopping myself from remembering that horrible day mom died. “Do you want that to happen to you too?”

“No,” I managed to reply amidst my throat getting dry.

Dad stared at me for a minute before heaving a sigh. “I’ve decided, Isaiah.”

“W-what?”

“You’re going to North Vale.”


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