Walking upstairs I couldn't help but notice how quiet it was. I had been back at the shop a little over a week and Willow had yet to come to spend the night. I found it ironic how I used to hate when girls would try to spend the night with me or hint they wanted me to spend the night. I would avoid it like the plague. Willow however was a different story altogether.
I wasn't upset that she wasn't here, in fact I understood all too well. Her Aunt Maureen had taken a turn for the worst. The day I had moved back in the shop she Willow called me crying telling me she didn't know what to do. She didn't want me mad at her but she couldn't just leave her aunt.
Of course I did the right thing and told her to stay as long as she needed. Every day after work I stopped and brought her something to eat or picked up something she might need from the store. She was always grateful when I got there but seeing her exhausted bothered me.
I had offered to stay and help but she never let me stay more than a few minutes each time. Maureen had been in the living room tonight when I walked in with the groceries and the look she gave me was almost comical. Maureen still didn't like me much. In fact she would mutter under her breath the entire time I was there but I ignored it just to be around Willow.
The past week had been a little crazy. Rico had come and gone and left a whole path of destruction behind him. The night he arrived dad and him went missing for a couple of hours and the next morning we heard Andy's shop was no more. It along with all of his race cars had been burned to the ground.
Before he left Rico assured me he would get the info I needed to just give him a little time. I wasn't worried about him, I knew he would get back with me soon. The morning Rico left we had all ate breakfast together. He and dad had acted like nothing happened and it wasn't till later in the day that we had even found out about the fire.
I never asked Dad about that night and he never brought it up. The subject had come up once but it was just shrugged off as nothing important. Sometimes I guess it was just better not to dwell on the past.
Walking to the fridge I grabbed a beer and went to sit on the couch. I'd never really been big on tv, wasn't much of a gamer. To be honest I never really gave myself any downtime. If I wasn't at work, or racing I was helping dad with a car, practicing, or out doing shit I had no business doing.
Kicking my feet up on the coffee table I leaned back wondering if maybe I should go hand with the guys. Shaking my head I knew that wouldn't end well. They were probably at the bar playing pool which meant several of the girls I was currently having to block would be there. If Willow found out I could see her blowing a gasket and I didn't have time to argue with her. Not when she was at her Aunts who already hated me.
It wasn't late enough to go to bed so I gave in and turned the tv on. As I figured nothing was on, I ended up just turning the tv off. Sighing I reached down for my phone.
"I'm about to come sneak through your window," I sent Willow in a text.
She replied back, "are you trying to give my poor aunt a heart attack."
"I'm bored, " I sent her.
I smiled as I saw Willow's name pop up on my phone. "What do you want?"
She laughed, "my poor Maddox is bored. Have you tried reading a book?"
Snorting I took another drink of my beer, "you know it's not fair you come spend weeks with me never leaving my side then you just disappear."
Willow sighed, "I know I miss you too. I mean I don't even want to think about how things will be when I move back home."
"What?" I hadn't meant to say it out loud but my heart had just slammed down to the ground. I'd never even considered the fact that she would even want to go back home. She never talked about leaving. I guess I should have known but the news hit me like a ton of bricks.
"I mean you know I can't stay down here forever Maddox." She paused, "Aunt Maureen really isn't doing good. When she is no longer here then there will be no need for me either."
Letting out a sigh I didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything. I felt angry and I didn't know why. I mean I knew why. I was pissed the fuck off she thought she could just up and leave me after she broke down all my fucking walls. This was the exact reason I didn't let my guard down.
"Maddox," Willow said sighing, "there is nothing down here for me."
I couldn't control my anger anymore. "I'm fucking down here Willow. Am I not enough for you?"
Willow gasped shocked at the anger in my tone, "You know I love you Maddox but..."
"But what," I said.
"Maddox your whole life is here, mine isn't."
"Then where is it?" I sighed standing up, "you only came down here because you were running from your problems."
Willow groaned, "why are you so mad at me? You knew I wasn't planning on staying here forever."
"No the fuck I didn't," I said knowing I probably should have. "I didn't think you would barge your way into my life to just slam the door in my face."
"Excuse me," Willow said. "I didn't want anything to have anything to do with you but you wouldn't fucking let up."
"That's why you let me fuck you on the roof of my car in a barn in the middle of fucking nowhere."
Willow let out a cry of frustration, "I swear to God sometimes I hate you Maddox. You are so fucking selfish. Have you ever stopped and thought about how I felt. No, it's always about you isn't it."
I snorted, "bye Willow."
Hanging up I threw my beer bottle at the wall watching it crash into pieces as liquid spewed everywhere. Fuck, why the hell couldn't I have just gone to sleep? How was I being selfish? Because I didn't want her to leave? Then yeah, yeah I was selfish.
Sitting back down I closed my eyes ignoring the mess I had made. I didn't want to deal with that right now. Had I just fucked things up with Willow? Was it even worth it to try and smooth things over with her if she was just going to run and leave me in a few months?
Dad had let mom leave him once and he said it was the biggest mistake he had ever made. I didn't want to make that same mistake with Willow but I didn't know how to make her stay. How did you make someone stay if they didn't want to?
Getting up I went and cleaned the glass and beer up off the wall and floor before going and doing what I should have done all along. I went and got in the shower and took my ass to bed. Sleep, however, wasn't on my side and I just laid in bed staring out the window at the stars.
I wondered what Willow was doing. Was she upset about our fight? Hell she was probably pissed. I knew I had said things I shouldn't but I didn't know how to tell her any other way that I didn't want her to go. I mean I had asked her if I was enough and she had basically ignored me throwing in the generic you know I love you. Then damn it love me enough to stay with me.