Lighting Sparks #6
Mary Johnson POV
Once I came home after school, I realized that Hailee and Ben hadn't come home yet from work. They are probably working late today...
So I let the babysitter go and watched over my son and my niece. I strapped both of them in their baby highchairs for a little snack which is diced banana. I sit on the stool behind the counter and watch them eat making baby noises. I smile seeing both of them look at each other with weird faces like 'you look at me?' expressions. God, they are so adorable-
My thoughts are cut off bringing my full attention hearing the front door swing open and the sound of Ben walking in, "I am more than pissed Hailee..." I hear him say walking down the hall not even once looking this way towards the kitchen. I furrow my brows wondering what in the world is going on? Ben charges towards their room and opens the door, Hailee following behind him hot on his tail begging for him to listen to her.
"Ben I just found out about that and I am sorry-" her voice was cut off by her shutting the door behind them. I sit here for a while hearing nothing but the two of them fight behind the closed door down the hall. Voices muffled and continuously getting louder. I wonder what they are fighting about?
I look back over to the babies seeing that they are aimlessly playing with their food, not caring what's going on around them.
After a while, the bedroom door swings open, and here comes Ben walking this way. His face stern and lips pulled into a fine line; he looks pissed. Hailee quickly tries to catch up to his pace though once Ben opens the front door again, he leaves closing it shut behind him. Hailee abruptly stops at the front door with a deep frown. She finally looks over to me and kids, her eyes glossing over as if almost about to cry, "Is everything okay, Hailee?" I ask her.
Hailee shakes her head, "He just had a long day, that's it..." She trails off looking at the front door again, "Now that you're here we need to talk," she then adds. Oh great...
I knew what she wanted to talk about. I knew she read those messages from Andrew and me. I just wish she hadn't, "Talk about what?" I ask nonchalantly. She rolls her eyes at me in return.
"About everything Mary. This little secret we both kept...Well, it turned out to be a huge one, especially when it involves Ben's son. Know he is pissed because I lied to him, not telling him the full truth of the situation," She stresses out.
I frown sighing, "I'm sorry Hail, I didn't want this to affect you and Ben. Do I need to go talk to him?" I offer. I don't like being the problem in their marriage, and that's how I am feeling right now. Maybe, I should just give them a break of all this? Sometimes I feel like I just add extra attention, although, they haven't said it to my face, I feel it. I feel like a burden. They shouldn't have to deal with my problem let alone be apart of it.
Hailee shakes her head, "No," she simply replies, sounding rather uptight. She walks over to Izzie and picks her up out of the high chair, "I will be in my room it's almost getting late.".
I watch as she walks down the hallway with Izzie in her arms, once she closes the bedroom door, silence fills the air. I bend my head down thinking about how this is my fault. Having her keep things from her husband. Now that I think about it, I should have never asked of her to do that. I look over to Colton as he is about to close his eyes in his highchair. I get up off the barstool and grab Colton and make my way towards my bedroom. As soon as I was in the room and place him in his crib, I then reach under my bed and grab a big suitcase and my school bag. Opening the suitcase I hurriedly grab all my clothes and pajamas in it. I take out all Colton's clothes and stuff them into his diaper bag along with lotion and cream.
I send a text to Andrew without hesitation.
[Me] Will it be alright with you if Colton and I spend a couple of nights at your place? I feel as if I am not wanted here right now.
I put down my phone on the bed only to quickly pick it back up hearing it ping.
[Andrew] What do you mean? And of course.
[Me] I have a feeling you already know what I mean Andrew. They were just fighting about us and I don't want that. It's all my fault. So it's best if I give them space.
[Andrew] I'm sure they are not blaming you, sweetheart. I have to go house fire call
I mentally roll my eyes at the message then smile feeling my heart flutter just a bit on the 'sweetheart' part. I send a message back saying that I and Colton will be all set and ready whenever he gets off work.
My eyelids flutter open hearing my phone go off. I wipe my tired eyes squinting my eyes as I unlock my screen letting the harsh light glow in front of my face.
[Andrew] I'm outside.
My eyes widen seeing what time it is. I hastily get off my bed and grab all my bags and the diaper bag on the bed after sending him a text saying to come in and help with my stuff. After moments I hear my bedroom door open seeing Andrew peek his head in with a sheepish guilty smile. I furrow my brows seeing that his face is covered of what looks to be dirt and ash? "You look like you just came out of a chimney..." I comment.
Andrew grabs both bags from me and shrugs a shoulder, "There was a building on fire down West Main street, it took a while to put out the flames.".
Not giving into small chat I turn around and carefully pick up Colton from the crib and place him in the car seat that is on the ground before carrying it. We both walk out of my room quietly trying not to wake the people in the house. Once we made it out the door I notice that Ben is not home still? His car is not on the driveway...
Andrew Rogers POV
We made it to my place, it was only twenty minutes away from Ben's. I unlock my door opening it for Mary as she carries Colton in her arms. She walks in eyeing the place, "Wow, Andrew this is nice," She compliments my small little apartment. I shrug in response.
I watch as she walks around my living room after I close the front door and place her belongings on the couch. Colton is fast asleep in her grasp, I smile staring at how loving and motherly Mary is. How her small hand lays softly on the top of the infant's head while one of her fingers twirl around his tiny strands of hair on the side. The sight causing my heartbeat to steadfast and eyes capturing a beautiful image; an image I want to stain and embed in my mind for a long-lasting memory. "Where do I and Colton sleep?" I hear her ask bringing me back from a haze.
My eyes meet hers and suddenly I am at a loss of words. I clear my throat looking to the side, "Down the hall first door on left. I was hoping we could finally talk about-"
"It's late Andrew...I have school in the morning.".
I close my mouth frowning, "Well, don't let me keep you waiting..." I grunt out walking in the direction while grasping her bags and making my way down the hallway, hearing her follow behind me. I open the door to the bedroom, "I have extra pillows for you and Colton in the laundry closet I'll go get them," I exclaimed leaving the two of them in the bedroom. After I give her a couple more pillows I see that she is already getting themselves ready for bed. Honestly, I am upset, upset because I needed to talk to her. To say what's on my mind...But, I leave them to rest and walk straight to the bathroom to take a shower to wash all today's grim and soot off of me.
(Okay now cue song 'Hard For Me' by Michelle Morrone. This song is deep and Morrone has a beautiful voice and talent also it has more meaning than that silly movie. I feel like this song speaks volumes for this scene.)
I start the shower feeling the lukewarm water cascade down. I step in and scrub my body in a vigours manner. I then close my eyes leaning my head back letting the water fall on to my face. I sigh out loudly now bending my head down and lean both my hands onto the tile wall.
After finishing my shower I wrap my waist with a white towel then run my fingers through my damp hair. I open the bathroom door and walk out heading towards my bedroom, only to stop, and turn my head over to where Mary is at. The door is half-open with the lights off. Taking a hesitant step I lift my hand to open the door wider seeing that Mary is sleeping soundly in the bed with Colton laying sideways with two pillows on each side of him so that way he couldn't move from his spot. I smile at how his chubby rolls take over his arms and legs as he sleeps quietly next to his mother.
I tighten the towel around my waist and walk closer to the side of the bed to take a seat on a chair that is sitting by the wall. Mary is laying on her side back facing me, her shoulders are slowly heaving up and down; which tells me she is indeed sleeping. The light from outside window of the full moon is flooding through the opened curtains making it easier to see her. I take in the silence before opening my mouth, "What I wanted to talk about is, is that if Colton wasn't mine..." I trail off at the end whispering. I swallow hard feeling nervous all of a sudden. Maybe it's because I usually don't share my thoughts or feelings as much. But, when it comes to Mary, I feel like the weight lifts upon my body and the world seems lighter, freer. "If Colton ends up not mine, I wouldn't mind. To be honest...I worry..." I whisper lowly feeling my throat contract with all these piling emotions. I find myself unable to breathe at this point, but, I need to say it...I need too.
"God, Mary. I worry because if he is mine...I-I'm afraid he will have demons. The ones I live with every day," I breathe out, voice cracking at the end. I lean a bit closer to her sitting at the edge of the chair, "I am afraid that he will be like me," I finally confess my thoughts about it.
I feel alone tear fall down my jawline once I finally speak up again, whispering, "But, apart of me wants to know if he is my son...If he isn't that doesn't change the fact that I am in love with you a-and I would love him just as much.".
Mary is still asleep with her back facing me still. I thought I noticed her breathing had stopped for a second but that was probably me just imagining it.
What I just said and confessed is true. From the first moment, I laid eyes on her when we bumped into each other at the school two years ago. I was simply taken by her beautiful caramel eyes as they held me captive and the way her pink plumped lips smile shyly. I wanted nothing more in this world but to find out who she was, and I have.
I get up off the chair and near her, I lean down slowly to place a chaste kiss on the side of her head, I whisper, "I don't want to waste your freedom. If it takes years to win back your heart then so be it. I know we said we can be friends again the other night, but, I think that will be the hardest part for me. Because I can't just be friends with you, Mary. I can't. I want all of you.".
With that, I quietly walk out of the room closing the bedroom door slightly. I wipe a tear-off from under my nose and went straight to my room and try to fall asleep.
I lay in my bed, trying so fucking hard to fall asleep. I toss and turn until I lay sideways facing my nightstands clock. It's 1:12 a.m.
I groan in annoyance.
I yank my pillow from underneath my head and slam it on top of my face, "Damn it," I grunt out., clenching my fist into the pillow atop of me, almost suffocating my own self.
'Someone watching you!'
'You are in the dark and they will get you!'
'You don't deserve anyone!'
I press the pillow further down on my face, literally wanting the voices to just stop now. "Ssshut upth pwease!" I shout into the pillow as it muffled my voice.
FUCK! Make it stop!
My body shakes and my mind overloads with whispers sneaking inside my thoughts. I quietly scream into the pillow once the voice becomes louder and louder until-
The voices had stopped once hearing her voice from outside of my bedroom door.
Author note: Hope you enjoyed it. My poor baby Andrew :(