Chapter 1 (The Break Up)
It's really ridiculously flustering when the person who gives you all kinds of butterflies in your stomach and brings you all the good in the mornings would say the words, "I love you" yet ready to leave and let you go. I didn't even think that those words can also be an alternative for goodbyes!
Everything was exhilarating and there seems nothing horrible could separate us except the stupid class hours we need to take. My precious brain keeps on thinking—like what it does to get an A in every exaggerated exams. But this time it's thinking about something frivolously stupid. Did I do something unimpressive that makes him foolishly think about breaking up with a popular-intelligent-beautiful girl in the New York University? Am I not enough?
Great, I sound trite.
These are my dreadful thoughts to myself before everything fell apart.
As I sit in the couch, I thought of these unanswered questions while watching the rain debilitate my poor emotions. I look extremely terrible. My hair is like a hurricane went through a lot of cities and destroyed all buildings and houses, my eyes were like a deep hole with dark curves around it. Ugh, it's 4:48 in the morning and I just want to sleep peacefully at night but Ford is really getting into my nerves! That jerk got some unbelievable guts interfering even at my dreams—or should I say, my nightmare because he was there.
I really hate mentioning his name but dude, you can't blame me! Ford Yexelson is my ex-boyfriend who broke up with me over nothing—yes, over nothing! Who would have thought about that, right? I could most probably say that I am a perfect and Ideal one for him as he is to me because that jerk was also one of the popular hot and intelligent handsome guy around the campus. And I can't even deny that he is the sweetest and most adorable lad I've ever dated. And in fact, he was always elected as homecoming King. And oh, Don't even think of I to become his homecoming queen.
I hate those cheap crowns and fake diamonds.
As I prepare for the stuffs that I'll bring for school, my phone suddenly rang. I took it up while munching away some leftover chips in the fridge.
"Hey, Francine!" Sandy greeted me like it's always her first time to have an answered call.
"I'm on my way, where are you?" I sighed. "I have no sleep again."
Sandy is my high school bestfriend. She's a perfectly gorgeous Filipina with a beautiful and amazing personality that makes her one of the popular girls I adore and hang out with.
"For the nth time France, is it about Ford again, isn't it?" Sandy taunted.
I exhaled. "Come on, I really need to hurry up, let's meet at the coffee shop."
I arrived just on time because fabulous girls are always punctual. I wear my favorite red dress partnered with the necklace which my mom gave me on my 18th birthday.
I saw Sandy and two of my girls—Diane and Alexa chatting when they saw me, Diane beckoned in their way. They all look very beautiful and stunning, of course, no one is left behind!
"Hey girls, what's the catch?" I said while the waiter handed me the menu.
"Umm, I guess, I-I should tell... Should I?" Alexa stammered while looking with the girls. I narrowed my eyes on them. They were all excited yet skeptical to tell me.
"I don't wanna waste my brain cells thinking about how trivial your topic is, Alexa." I nonchalantly said while I ordered my favorite chocolate caramel presto black. Yes, I'm obsessed with sugar and sweets.
"It's not like gossips and such, France. It's about Ford."
What is it? Why is it about Ford? What happened to Ford? What makes you skeptical about Ford? Tell me... Tell me!!!
"What about Ford?" I said and I'm extremely freaking out inside but I need to act normal.
Diane cleared her throat as I wait for my coffee.
"I think Ford is really a Jerk. He dropped all his subjects and probably, he won't study at New York University anymore. " Diane said while sipping her black coffee.
"Oh that's—that's awful." I sighed. "I don't even care at all. If he wants to waste his opportunities or be some kind of drug addict and ruin his life, he's not my problem anymore." I forced myself to ignore the urge to asked why he left NYU.
"The thing is, he left you—" Sandy blurted.
"Jesus, Sandy. I know right." I said annoyingly.
Sandy rolled her eyes and looked at me. "Can you please let me finish my sentence? He left you—this letter. He said you should read that because it will make things clear between the both of you." Sandy said while I stare at her green garden-like beautiful eyes.
"The letter is pretty thick, how many folds did he do to it? I bet, he will win the 'best essay award' this time." Diane said.
Alexa and Sandra burst into laughter.
"Babe, this guy must be romantic enough to write you a very long letter." Sandy said while laughing off.
I rolled my eyes. "What's so romantic with a letter from an ex-boyfriend? Maybe this is some sort of how cheaters confess they're cheating or an 'It's not you, it's me' sort of a letter."
"How did you know if he cheated or something?" Alexa asked. "We all know how proud he is with you anywhere and we witnessed that anytime a random girl would talk to him, he refuses and would tell he has a girlfriend."
"Yes, we witnessed that. Remember the day we invited him to a party? A lot of girls are looking at him," Diane continued. "Your boyfriend is extremely a gorgeous man that night."
I sighed. Yes I can't deny that he is. "You already said that he's gorgeous—and what else could be the possible reason of our break up? His mom and dad like me, his sisters love hanging out with me. Believe it or not but we fought only once because of buying the wrong flavor of an ice cream. There is no way he would break up with me but girls."
"Okay," Sandy said. "But you can't just assume that he cheated on you or broke up with you because of another girl."
"Yes that's true, maybe there is more important reason of the break up thing." Diane said.
Alexa held my hand and gaze at the letter, then looked at me. "Maybe, you should really read that letter for your peace of mind."
I think for a second, then I opened it and I saw our picture back when we are at the beach for our first anniversary vacation.
Oh how I love that moment.
That picture was the best day of my life, I remember how we used to lay down at the beach near the seashore and let the sea salt touch our skin while we watch the calming shade of a dark sky with the beautiful vivid stars while wishing upon them.
Memories and emotions start to flow through my eyes like a raging sea. But before it happens, I started to wrap my things and stand up.
"Hey, we have to go. I've never been late in any of my first subject. See you at the cafeteria." We hugged each other and exchanged our goodbyes before we separate ways.
I walk my way through the parking lot and I can feel the pain throbbing my chest.
Why does he have to do this?
Why would he leave everything and run away?
Yes he left me without any reasons at all, but he is not likely to let his studies fall and just drop everything out. He won't do that, he will never do that.
But he did.
As I gather all my thoughts and confusion, I turned my attention back to the letter.
Is it another farewell that disguised as a letter?
Is it a paper that has ability to break me again into pieces?
I unfold again the letter as my tears bide to fall.
No, no, no, I won't cry.
I closed my eyes for a second and blinked twice, getting ready to read the letter.
I'm desperately asking for Batman's help to read the letter for me but, nevermind. Superman is still the best though. Or maybe, Wonderwoman can give me some pep talk before opening this letter.
Okay, I sound so stupid.
I saw a part of the letter saying, "I love you, my dear Francine. I'll be—" What the earth?
I never thought of hating those words, but I'm starting to hate it. Is it his favorite line? Saying goodbye using I love yous?
Come on Ford. You're such a pain in the ass.
Before I'll become insane, I folded the letter and drop it in my bag. I need to drive my way to school before getting insane because of a piece of paper.