The alarm clock buzzed in the distance and I reached over to slap the snooze button, squinting at the iridescent hands.
At this very moment, I completely detested my so-called mystery man for keeping me up all night. Why did he have to be such engaging company? It was always so hard to just call it a night and put the phone away whenever I started conversing with him. And you know what the worst part was? I didn’t even know him from Adam?! I was so delusional or really lonely-maybe both.
The thing is, talking to him was like talking to a shrink. He drew you in and cracked your mind open like a blinking coconut. The guy was talented I tell you or he was a sorcerer or something.
Lately, I found myself wondering what it would be like to meet him in person? Over coffee, a drink, lunch or even dinner maybe? Maybe I was pushing it or getting into deep but he had sneaked into my heart and taken over my life. I couldn’t spend a day without texting the nameless guy- that I don’t even know what he looks like-even if we had to pass each other on the street -how lame or insane is that??! Gosh! I’m so gone... I need help but I keep telling myself we’re not hurting anyone right? It’s just a little harmless fun. This is just like having a pen-pal or something right? Come to think of it...I didn’t even know which state his from or where he lives... There’s something terribly wrong with me...
Maybe I should stop this madness before it goes too far but I really don’t want to. I like it. To be honest, I like him...a lot... more than a lot actually. What am I even saying?? I know love is blind but how can I be falling for a guy that I’ve never even seen? Call me crazy but he gets me. He really does. I just wish this could have been real. I wish I could meet him and talk to him in person,-look into his eyes as he smiles or dishes out his crass innuendos. I wish I could go on dates with him and maybe even take a swipe at the dreaded “R” word... Relationship.
What would it be like to have him as a boyfriend? We get along so well, like gas and fire but would that end up in an explosion, then I’ll be left to pick up the shattered pieces again.
I’m just so confused...
“Wakey-wakey....” Hailey said as she plopped on the side of the bed, ruffling my hair in the process.
“Go away...” I groaned into my pillow.
“Did the flirty mystery guy keep you awake all night with his naughty texts?” She asked, a smug smile on her lips.
“Something like that...” I struggled to sit up, rubbing my eyes before I yawned again.
Hailey rolled her eyes. “When are you two going to meet already? This has now exceeded its sell-by date.”
“Things are better this way Lee.”
“What if he’s married? A killer? A stalker-”
“He’s not a killer Lee. Stop being so dramatic.” My hand went to my neck, and I threw off the covers, crossing the cold tiled floor to the bathroom.
“Then he’s married!” She shouted before I shut the door. It was too early for this.
But what if she’s right? I thought to myself as I squirted shower gel on the sponge. Maybe he was married and was using me as a-a distraction. Gosh, I’m so stupid... Why hadn’t I seen this before? It was evident that he didn’t want more than a casual sext buddy.
I think it was time to end this charade. I would not be a home-wrecker and be the cause of breaking up someone’s happy home. I would end this-whatever it was-tonight.
I dressed hastily and went down to the kitchen and was almost done with breakfast when my phone heralded a message notification. It was him-the two-timing-wait why was I even angry? This guy didn’t belong to me, he owed me nothing and promised me just as much.
MM: Good morning kinky kitten. Did you dream about me? I definitely dreamt about you...
I glowered at the phone and squeezed it in my hand. I wasn’t going to play this game with him anymore.
“Look, Lynn...” Hailey reached over the counter as we ate, and put her warm hand over mine. “I’m sorry if I offended you. I just don’t want you to get in way over your head. You hardly know this guy and he hasn’t even made an effort to show you his face or at least tell you his name... Doesn’t that seem the least bit strange to you?”
I cast a forlorn look at my cereal and reluctantly turned toward her. “I know... but I’m just having a little harmless fun okay? I’m not hurting anyone.... but you’re right...” I nodded. “I’ll end it tonight.”
“I know you’re on the rebound but I’d prefer it if you found a real guy you know?” Her smile faded and her expression became ardent. “A guy that appreciates you and isn’t ashamed to show the world that you belong to him. You deserve that doll. You deserve so much more than what he or Tristan gave you.”
“I know...” I admitted quietly. “I’ll tell him later today. Promise.”
“Maybe you might meet someone in LA, when you’re at that Kylo King concert...” A pleased smile was on her lips again and her eyes held a glint of excitement. “When do you leave?”
“Tomorrow night...” I wasn’t trying to sound glum really, but I guess it came out that way.
“Great! We’ve got time to go shopping then,” she said as she slid off the stool. “Let’s meet after work? Gotta go doll,” she grabbed her car keys and rushed out. “Love you!”
MM: I hope you’re not ignoring me, sweet cheeks? Are you still sleeping? You better wake up or you’re going to be late....”
I threw my phone into my handbag without replying and left for work, feeling kinda down. Why was I letting this affect me? Why was I having withdrawals already? But this needed to be done I guess. There was no way I could continue like this. Hailey was right... I deserved better.