The most irritating thing about humans are that they are the most oblivious creatures to ever exist. They don't have any idea what's going on around them. But that wouldn't be so bad, if it was just that.
But with humans, it's never just that.
They don't know anything going on around them but pretend, or worse, believe they do. They are such know-it-alls that it gets on my nerves. They have neither the time nor the experience to know a thing about life. If they did, why did they waste every moment of it?
Esme shut her locker door and jumped.
"Ms. Anderson," the principal greeted. "Sorry to scare you."
"Oh Mrs. Sanchez! Sorry, I didn't see you. Did you need something?"
"Well yes, actually I did. We have a new student I would like you to show around."
Esme smiled. "I'd be glad to Mrs. Sanchez. Where should I meet them?"
The principal stepped aside to reveal a smiling Gal.
Esme was surprised. "Gal?"
Mrs. Sanchez looked between them and smiled before walking away.
"Hey buddy," Gal greeted. "Forgot I was coming here did you?"
She punched him playfully. "You should have told me you were starting today idiot."
He shrugged. "You never asked. Hasn't anyone taught you to ask more questions?" He teased with mock astonishment.
This earned him a harder punch. "Ouch," he moaned. "You can hit hard."
Esme laughed. "Yes I can. So don't mess with me okay?"
"Yes ma'am," Gal replied, saluting her. She laughed.
"How'd you like Mrs. Sanchez?" Esme asked.
Gal shuddered. "She's such a statue, it's kind of scary."
Esme grinned. "That's how you're gonna feel for a couple of days, that's all. She's the best teacher in the school. Now, what's your schedule. Lemme see." She snatched it from his hand, her finger skimming over it. "You have all the same classes as me, expect 7th period. Oh well."
She looked up at him. He was staring at her oddly. She lifted her eyebrows at him. "What?" She asked.
He shook his head. "Nothing. Shall we go?"
He started to walk and she ran after him. "What?" She whined. "You're not telling me what you were thinking!"
He smiled a little. "I'm not under any obligation to, am I?"
"I say you are," she declared. "Now tell me!" She slapped his arm.
"Stop hitting me!" He yelled, pushing her hand away. "And it's nothing big."
"Then why can't you just tell me?" She countered.
"Okay fine," he conceded. "I was just thinking about how you're different."
"Different?" She asked. "What do you mean 'different'?"
"I don't exactly know... There's something about you, I guess." He shrugged.
Esme suddenly felt rather fidgety, somewhat insecure. "Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"
He smiled as they walked into class. "It's a great thing,"
Esme shut the door to her room and jumped on to the bed. She pulled up her laptop and logged onto Skype. Robby was already online so she called immediately. He picked up on the first ring.
"Hey Es!" He literally screamed as his face popped up onto the screen. Esme laughed as he waved at her with the enthusiasm of a mad man.
"Hey to you too," she said back, simply. He pouted. "What?" She asked.
"Show a little energy would you? People wouldn't even know we're best friends with that greeting."
She knew he was being light hearted and she knew she owed him a better hi but all she could do was sigh. "Sorry. I have a lot on my mind."
He stared at her. "How was it yesterday?"
There was a moment of silence. "My mom didn't say a word. She just placed a rose and ran off. And I know I shouldn't be thinking this way-"
"-But you're questioning whether she cares about him or not?"
Esme nodded. "Look you don't have to lecture me. I know I'm not being rational."
He held his hand up to the screen. "If you know anything about me, you'll know I'm gonna lecture you. Not cause I want to lecture you particularly but because you need to hear what I'm going to say.
"You're telling me you know you're wrong but if you really did, you would not be thinking that way in the first place. Let me remind you of some things. Who was the woman who, when she heard about your dad's death, cried her eyes out for days and refused to touch any food? Who's the women who lost all sense of sanity during that time of your, and her life? Who's the women who sat with you one night and told you how scared she was, how much she loved the man and how she didn't know how anything was going to be okay? Most mothers don't do that. The stay strong for their kid. But this woman in particular, was driven so mad by the loss, that she told her daughter how she really felt. That's how much she loved him. It was enough for her to not be able to adjust to a world without him. She loved him enough for her to be his lover over your mother for one night.
"Now, when one's emotions are that strong, they need time. They can't face things that easily. If I'm being completely honest with you, I thought she'd bail on you. It's commendable that she didn't. So you, Esme Eve Anderson, need to tell that tiny voice in your head that she loved him more than you can ever imagine, still loves him more than you can ever imagine so that voice can shut it's trap and sit."
Esme laughed at how fired up he was getting. But she continued to smile not because of that but because he always knew exactly what to say.
She voiced her thoughts. "God only knows how you always know exactly what to say."
He smiled and Esme knew he wasn't done. "How were you Esme? Did you do okay?"
"Can we not?" Esme whispered, scared of breaking down again. "I just..."
"It was that bad?" Robby asked. But there was no sympathy in his voice. And Esme loved him for that.
"No," she answered, accepting that it was okay to break down in front of Robby. Because it was Robby, for God's sake. "I spoke. For like ten minutes. After she left.
"People believe that when you speak to them, they listen to you. But I don't know what to believe. One thing was for sure though. I felt closer to him yesterday than I have for a whole year. And to tell you the truth Rob, it was kinda nice."
"And you're not a demon for feeling good about it," Robby said even before the voice in her head could take over. "I think it was a great step towards closure. And, Esme? I believe he's listening. Go there more often. Not just when you're in pain or when you're in extreme joy, but also just to talk. Whenever you would have gone to him if he was here, next to you. I believe he's listening."
Esme stared up at the ceiling, blinking back her tears. "God," she grunted. "This is hard."
Robby looked at her with guilt in his eyes. "I know. And I wish I was there with you in Hertford but I'm rotting here in stupid Seattle because of my silly mom's stupid job transfer and-"
"Woah Rob," Esme interrupted before he smashed something. "I love you for getting all riled up on my behalf and I miss you too but don't worry about it. You're still here, like right now. You have been since the day we met, when I was fallen on the road with a bleeding knee. We don't even need to stay close to be together. And besides, who knows what it would have been like even if you had stayed? I mean, people who aren't separated by distance still get separated."
He tilted his head. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"I'm talking about Jane," Esme stated. "Ever since Skyler, we haven't been talking as much. She's just been... Obsessed. I mean, I get it's new and exciting and all. But she can't just forget her old friends. And besides, I do not want to know all the gory details." She scrunched up her face in disgust, leaving Robby in fits of laughter. He nearly fell off his chair.
When he calmed down, he noticed she was sulking, not smiling. "Come on Esme. You must be dumber than I thought you were if you really think you two would separate. For God's sake! You're Esme and Jane! Jane and Esme. Nothing comes between the two of you. The only reason I'm happy to be in Seattle right now is because I don't have to third wheel the two best friends in the whole universe anymore. Don't get me wrong, I do love you both. But that's not my point. My point is you two are inseparable. You get that right?"
She thought about it for a moment. All the countless laughs and pranks, the tiny fights that only brought them closer together. That was Esme and Jane. They were inseparable. She knew that.
Of course she did.
So Esme and Robby continued to speak for the next two hours while I sighed in dismay. Esme had made her third mistake.
She believed those words.
Zac stood outside Esme's gate, staring up at her house. All he needed was the push to go in. But the person who was supposed to push him was sitting and chilling in his dad's house in Ohio. How great for Zac.
Through the first floor window, he could see Esme on her bed, laptop open. She had her hair in a messy bun and it fell all over her face as she laughed with the person on screen. Robby, no doubt.
Zac balled his fists and closed his eyes, willing himself to calm down. Esme had every right to talk to other guys. It's not like she was his. In fact, she had made it very clear recently that she was anything but his.
He'd done it to grab her attention as much as he had to get her out of his system. It somehow mattered so much that she didn't care that he existed. So he wanted to make a move that would make her really look at him. Notice him.
And he'd done that alright. But what he'd done had earned him her hatred. She now noticed him. Only now, when she saw him, she either glared with all that she had or ran as far as she could.
And he deserved everything he got for the way he treated her.
He thought back to the times when he was younger and had tried to find a way to talk to her. The opportunity had presented itself when she was lying on the street with a scraped knee.
But then Robby had to have gotten there before him. Robby had to be the one who picked her up and carried her home. It had to be Robby. That was when Zac really felt he'd lost his chance. When another person made an entrance.
The decisions he had made after that were no good. To forget her. All the casual flings and one night stands. All to forget her.
Clearly none of it worked. Because every time he looked at another girl, the only thing he could think of was how they were not Esme.
So he tried going for her. She beat him up better than he could beat anyone.
And now she noticed him alright. He had everything he had hoped for.
Expect, not really.
He hadn't wanted to hurt her. And even more so, he hadn't wanted her to hate him.
So Zac stood rooted there, thinking of ways to push himself forward to apologize. Maybe he should call his best friend over from Ohio...
No. He could do this on his own. He would do it. He took one step forward. And another. And another. He pushed himself until he was standing in front of her front door, hand on the knocker, ready to lift it up.
Now, all he had to do was pull it, and let go.
He stood there, staring at her door, rehearsing what he would say.
But suddenly, her face from the other day popped into his mind. The hate she held in her eyes as she looked at him in that classroom.
Before he knew it, he was running. Running out of her gate, out of that street and as far away as he could get from her.
As far away as he could get from the truth.
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