I look over the kitchen counter at Leah kneeling by the sofa. As always, her position is flawless, but her fingers flutter nervously in her lap.
I want so badly to forget punishment and simply move on. Leah has been such a good girl all day and I feel bad for leaving her at the office without warning, but the truth is that our relationship and lifestyle is dependent on rules and discipline.
If I let her rule breaking slide, even if she broke the rule by accident, then our relationship wouldn't really be... good. I can't sustain a dom and sub relationship with a sub that I never discipline or hold accountable.
If Leah didn't want a dom and sub relationship then I would forget it, but she obviously does. She said it herself, she wants me to hold her to high expectations.
I put away the dishes slowly, giving her time to reflect on her situation and prepare herself for punishment.
Just like always, her punishment will be nothing too harsh, especially because Leah is already hyperactive.
I lean on the kitchen counter and watch her silently. I can see the wheels turning in her mind. She bites her lip nervously and takes harsh, nervous breaths.
I push myself from the counter and walk around to come and stand in front of her. She can only see my shoes, but my presence makes her more nervous.
"Leah, why are you being punished", I cross my arms over my chest. I keep my tone calm, going fully into dom mode.
"Be—cause because I wasn't taking care of mys—self," she spews out nervously. I hate seeing her stutter. She does it when she is nervous and she always finches like I will hit her for doing it.
"Take a deep breath and explain to me why you are being punished." I don't want her to be freaked out about this, punishment shouldn't be so nerve racking for her.
She takes a deep shaky breath and tries again, "I'm being punished bec—because I wasn't taking care of my hands Master."
I step back. "Kneel here." I point to the center of the living room.
She crawls over quickly and resumes her kneeling position. "Good girl."Even though this is a punishment, she still needs to be rewarded for listening.
I pace around her slowly, contemplating a punishment. The only punishment I have administered had been a spanking, but I don't want to give another punishment on top of her spanking from this morning.
An idea pops into my head and I know what I want to do, "I want you to get up. Go to the corner, and face the wall." I wait for her to complete each instruction. "You are going to stay there until I say differently." I leave to go set up her punishment.
I walk down the hall and into our playroom. I switch the lights on and dim them down. Her infraction was small, so I decide to use some ice before I move onto her reward for being good today.
I walk into the kitchen and ignore Leah as I pull out some ice from the fridge. I pour the ice in a bowl and fill it with some water too. "Color?" I ask on the way out.
"Green, Master."I smile and set the bowl of ice and water on a table in the playroom. I put my hand in and quickly pull it out.
It's cold. That's not gonna feel good. I walk over and dig through toys until I find a glass dildo. I drop it into the ice water and watch the ice melt.
Suddenly, I remember I haven't played with any toys besides a vibrator with her. Do I want a punishment to be her first experience with a toy?
I sigh and go dump the water into the hallway bathrooms sink. Peaking into the living room, I see Leah is nervously pacing between her two feet.
Maybe just having to stand there would be her punishment alone. How can I punish her without pain? Lucifer?
What if I took Lucifer away for a little bit?
She loves her stuffed cat dearly. Would that be over kill? I walk into our bedroom and look at the stuffed toy on the bed.
It's just a stuffed animal, right? Three days wouldn't kill her. I pick up Lucifer and bring him into the living room. "Leah, come kneel." I point to the same spot as before.
She turns around and I don't miss how she hesitates when she sees Lucifer in my arms. Leah obeys though, her eyes lingering on her stuffed animal.
I crouch down with him and I see the tears welling in her eyes. I hate to see her cry, but she needs to be punished, or else she won't learn. "For your punishment, I'm taking away Lucifer." She nods as tears run down her face. Leah wrings her hands in her lap and bites her lip angrily.
I stand up and sigh. She'll be fine, she will get over it. I take Lucifer into our bedroom and place him up on the top shelf where I know Leah can't reach him. When I come back into the living room, Leah is sobbing.
I sigh and pick her up. She has been punished and now it is time to comfort her.
For a second, I'm afraid she will push me away, but she sobs into my neck and squeezes onto me. I feel bad about taking her beloved cat away, I never knew it would upset her this much. "It's okay," I try to soothe her.
Her hands knot into my shirt and she shakes in my arms. I sit down on the sofa and cradle her to me. She calms down a little bit, tears still run down her face. "Do you want to go play now?"
She looks up at me with red and swollen eyes and shakes her head, "No". She breaks down into more tears and I hesitantly pull her into my lap again.
What does she mean she doesn't want to play?
She always wants to play?
"Since when does she not want to play?" I ask Troy in disbelief as we sit and have lunch. Troy just laughs and takes another bite of his sandwich.
I dropped Leah off with Melissa today when I went to work. She hadn't taken my punishment well and didn't seem to want me much anymore.
It hurts that she die want to be around me much. She didn't say that of course, but I could tell she was avoiding me. Last night she let me cuddle with her, but she didn't nuzzle up into my chest like always.
"Sounds like you fucked up," Troy says, shrugging. I scowl at him.
"I took away a damned stuffed animal. I never knew it would cause such problems, or I never would have bought it for her in he first place," I snap angrily.
Were me and Leah really fighting over a damn toy? I mean it's a toy, for kids.
"How long did you tell her you are taking it away?"
"I didn't specify. Thank God because I probably would have said I would give it back today, which is obviously not happening," I grumble in frustration. "I mean it was a gift. She didn't have anything and I thought it would be good, but I guess not."
"Well, maybe that's the problem," Troy says.
"What's the problem? Me buying her the damn thing, yeah probably."
"You said she didn't have anything. If that was the first gift she has ever received, then it was probably pretty important to her. You got her that before you collared her too, so that 'damn toy' means a lot to her. You have to remember, Rylan, that she probably never had a stuffed animal, or a comfort items before and you not giving a date for when you were giving it back probably made her think you were taking it away permanently," Troy says.
I stop chewing and think about what he had said. He was right. That was probably the first thing that she ever had, so me taking it away with out a date of return probably hurt her.
Even though it was just a toy to me, it was something that meant a lot to her; I failed to take that into account.
The look on my face must have spelled out my regret because Troy set down his food and tries to comfort me, "If it makes you feel any better, I really upset Melissa when we first met when I took away her collar. She never showed signs of liking it, so I thought taking it away for a little bit would be okay, but boy was I wrong. That collar cost me my sex privileges for months," Troy shivers as he remembers the event.
"What do I do?" I ask him seriously. I know I royally fucked up with Leah.
Troy shrugs, "I took Melissa to the lake when I realize what I had done. I gave it back to her and apologized."
"And that worked?"
Troy laughs and shakes his head, "No, she threw it off the dock and I had to buy her a new one. An expensive new one."
I rub the area between my brows. "What's up?" Sergeant Brant interrupts, walking over to us in the break room.
"Rylan fucked up royally with his sub," Troy chides happily.
The Sergeant turn to me angrily, "What did you do?" I groaned and Troy happily rats me out.
"He took away the first gift he had given her," Troy says like the snitch he is. Officer Brant laughs and sits down.
"It was a stuffed animal," I groan, slamming my head on the break room table. "I didn't know she would care so much."
"It's the first thing you gave her. Why wouldn't she care?" Sergeant Brant asks rhetorically while laughing up a storm. "My sub cried when the perfume I bought her on our first date ran out. I secretly refill that bottle every time I see it low now," he says in a whisper. His story makes he crack a smile. "So she's mad at you? What did she do? When my subs is mad at me, she burns my eggs on one side and the serves them to me, so I can't tell until I taste it".
I laugh and then groan, remembering my issue, "Leah is complex. I think she is mad. I mean if she is, then her version of mad consists of her not cuddling with me like usual and not meeting my eye."
"Oh. She's not mad at you. Something consistent with all women is that if they are mad at you, they will make damn sure you know it." Sergeant Brant slaps my back and stands up.
"Thanks Sergeant." He nods before leaving me and Troy.
I look over at Troy and he grins at me. "I'm just glad you finally realize how crazy these women are. For years I have told you and you never believed me–"
"Shut up." I say teasingly. He smirks at me and I can't help but grin back at him. I throw the rest of my lunch away, not really hungry to eat.
Yesterday Leah had been so excited to see me, I hope today won't be any different.
After sitting at my desk for an hour and still not being able to focus on my work, I get up and go knock on the Sergeant's door.
"Come in." I step inside his office. "Heading home early to go make amends with the sub?"
"How did you—"
"I can't work either when me and my sub are at odds," he admits with a shrug.
"Thank you." He simply nods and I head out towards my car.
I slide into and sigh as I realize I still have no clue what I am gonna do. Am I gonna pick her up first? Or should I go get Lucifer, so I can give it back? Or should I go get her a different and bigger one?
There is no doubt in my mind that Leah and Melissa have talked about me taking away Lucifer. After all, the first thing Melissa asked when we came over to drop Leah off was, 'Where is Lucifer' as if I Leah hadn't been upset enough. Melissa's question pushed her over, making Leah respond with,'Gone'.
By the dirty look Melissa gave me, I know that Melissa will be taking Leah's side. The only question is if Leah will follow Melissa's example and become angrier at me?
I hope she doesn't, but I also understand if she did. After the fact, I realize my actions had been pretty shitty and unthoughtful.
I decide to prepare for the worst.
I drive to the mall and immediately make my way inside.
My first thought I'd chocolate strawberries. What if I made her chocolate covered strawberries? It would be sentimental and thoughtful!
A gift would be good too, so I buy a blanket for her and some girly hair scrunchies. This should be good.
I check my watch. I need to head home if I am gonna make us chocolate covered strawberries.
I quickly prep the bed for her, getting out her new blanket and all the fuzzy blankets, so she can cuddle with them later.
For a moment, I noticed all the mute and manly colors and wondered if Lucifer is so important to her too because in our home it is the only thing that really established her presence.
Every piece of furniture, decoration or picture I have is before her. I'm sure she feels very out of place having nothing of hers.
A picture of her lounging here on the bed in her undergarments eating chocolate strawberries flash's through my mind and I immediately become hard.
I shake the heavenly image out of my head and rush towards the kitchen to make the strawberries.
When I pull up to get Leah, Troy still isn't home yet. I contemplate waiting and just as I'm about to just go in anyway, he drives up.
He waves and smirks at me as I walk up towards his house. "So what is your game plan?" Troy asks, getting out of his car.
"I made chocolate covered strawberries, bought a new fuzzy blanket and have Lucifer waiting for us at home with a little girly gift," I say proudly, hoping the peace offering will be enough.
Leah has never been a particularly hard person to please, but I have never messed up with her before.
"So when are you going to get on your knees and grovel at her feet for forgiveness?" Troy asks and my smile falls quickly. "Oh did you think that because you're the dominant that she wouldn't make you beg and cry? That's what I thought at first too. It's a rookie mistake." Troy slapsmy back and leading the way inside.
Would I really have to do that? Would Leah make me beg her for forgiveness. I would if I had to, but I mean as a dominant.... that is like totally my last resort.
"Ladies! We are home!"
"Hello, Master," Melissa says happily. Then she look at me. "Hey Rylan," she says flatly.
I can tell Melissa is mad. My heart stabs in pain as I don't see Leah anywhere. Suddenly I hear a, "Master!!!"
My heart jumps in joy as Leah knocks into me, her frail body wrapping around mine.
She clings to me like a child and as soon as I realize it's her, I swing her into my arms and kiss her all over. She lights up in delight before blushing.
I put her down and look at her. Could she really have forgiven me already? "You ready to go home?" I ask hesitantly, a smile plastered on my face.
I know she is excited to see me, but that doesn't mean she wants to go home. I see her smile falter as the thought of home reminds her about being upset with me.
I smile encouragingly as I see her completely deflate. I hold out my hand and she takes it without resistance.
Melissa clears her throat which causes me to look over at her. "Master Rylan?" She tilts her head towards the living room, signaling she wants to talk with me.
I internally groan and follow her, preparing for myself to get chewed out. Melissa thrusts a box of tampons into my hands once we are in private. "She started her period."
"Oh." I say, realizing I don't have anything.
"Do you have feminine products for her? I'll take that as a no." She rolls her eyes when she sees my blank expression. She leaves the living room before coming back and handing me a box of pads.
"She needs to make sure she changes out her tampons every eight hours..."
"Melissa," I interrupt her. "Can't you tell her this? I really don't need to know."
Melissa doesn't look impressed. "I already told her and now I'm telling you, so you remember to remind her so she doesn't get very sick."
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry." I guess she was right. Leah would probably need a reminder or two. She wasn't quite self sufficient yet. "Listen, I just have to take Leah home."
Melissa waves her hand dismissively at me and I go hunt down Leah who is waiting by the front door.
"Bye Melissa," Leah whispers.
Troy walks us to the front door with Melissa still staring daggers at me. "Bye, Leah!"
Leah doesn't say anything to me as she walks out barefoot into a light drizzle. I internally scold her, not daring to reprimand her aloud.
I run over and open the door and she quietly thanks me and slides in.
It is a slow trip to insanity as we drive home in silence. Unlike usual, she just stares at her hands the whole trip instead of out the window.
I was happy when she was excited to see me, but I am starting to think I would have rather her tried to claw my eyes out instead of sitting in silence passively.
The worst part is that I don't even think she knows she is punishing me. Leah is smart, but she has never had a dom and sub relationship where it's okay for her to be angry at her dominant, so I don't think she would be doing this on purpose.
Leah just sits next to me, silently torturing me. "Did you have fun with Melissa?" I ask once I can no longer take the silence.
"I heard you started your period," I say in a chipper tone, trying to strike a conversation. Leah's brows furrow, "That's pretty cool," I elaborate and she looks out the window.
"What did you two do all day?" I change the subject.
A part of me hopes they did chores or something besides brood over my actions.
"We just talked, Master," she says quietly as we pull into the drive way.
Great, Melissa probably worked Leah up too when she was already 'PMS'ing.
"Oh, about anything in particular?" I help her out of the car and follow behind her as she goes inside. "Ummm maybe?" She admits softly, glancing up at me.
I know what they probably talked about, but I want verbal confirmation. "Let's go into our room and talk."
Leah obeys and I follow her down the hall. She starts to get down on all fours and I stop her, "You may walk," I say and she gets up.
Her eyes switch from the light switch I left off and the bed where blankets are piled.
I go over and open up the blinds, letting in the dim light and the sound of pattering rain outside. The rain is the only sound in the room. Leah stands awkwardly by the door, rubbing her arm as I take off my work belt and secure my gun and things into the gun safe.
"Come join me?" I ask hesitantly, patting the bed beside me hopefully. Leah shuffles over obediently.
She purses and then bites her lip as she sits down. I arrange the blankets around us, so she is wrapped up tightly in warmth and comfort. The new blanket I got her catches her eyes immediately and her brows furrow.
"I know you like fluffy things, so I thought you would like that." I explain after clearing my throat. She pulls it to her chest and buries her face into it.
"Thank you, Master." A small smile fall on her lips and I relax. I smile down at her and run a hand over her head.
She doesn't pull away, but she doesn't lean into me either. "Can I ask about what you and Melissa talked about?"
Leah hesitates too, but then nods before looking down. "I... I don't think I'm a bratty submissive."
That is all for a moment and I lift my brows.
"I haven't ever really been mad at my Master before...I know I shouldn't be. I know you have every right to take away whatever you want, but... I don't know. It made me mad that you took away Lucifer," she says quietly, sounding very conflicted and frustrated with her feelings.
I nod in understanding.
"I just don't know what to do because I'm upset you took Lucifer away, but Melisa says it's normal for me to be mad at you sometimes, but—but... I know I shouldn't be angry for you punishing me like that... but you, but you have everything," Leah says, looking up at me.
"I know all you did was take something away that wasn't even mine, but you could have anything, could have given me any other punishment. I would have given you anything, but you had to take the only toy I have ever had."
I can hear her frustration and internal battle in her tone. "I'm angry and I don't want to be. I'm mad and I shouldn't be."
I lean forward and caress her cheek and she lifts her head. "It's perfectly normal for you to be angry. I didn't think about what I was doing when I took away your stuffed animal," I try to explain.
"Did you already get rid of him?" Leah asks, her lower lip trembling.
"No, no of course not. I took him away with every intention of giving him back to you today or tomorrow," I say, pulling her into my lap.
"I wasn't so stupid to take him away permanently," I say with a chuckle, making her cry. "Can I go get him for you?"
"Lucifer?" She asks me and I nod. "Yes please, Master." She gets up and kneels on the edge of our bed. I get him as asked, bringing it back to her. I place it in her awaiting arms and she hugs onto him for dear life.
Was Lucifer really the only toy she had ever gotten?
"Thank you, Master," She says, hugging onto her stuffed cat with a vengeance.
"I'm so sorry if I hurt you, Love." I kiss her head. She smiles at me and snuggles into my arms, all her anger forgotten.